Emo blog post is emo

ok, blog post #2.

life is slow, starting my second semester of college. trying to work on some MTG art banners, and mildly failing at it Slant

also, i'm becoming more and more obsessive over the thought of my ex-gf. i just can't get her out of my head. whenever i'm not focused on something and let my mind wander she comes up. i start thinking about how happy i used to be, how i used to smile, and how i used to like life. genuinely. now i wander between ok mood, to emo depressive past thoughts, to self evaluating crying session. i just can't seem to bring myself to be happy. when i used to be with her. when life was truly happy, liveable, and genuinely good. how far i've fallen, how far down i've gone.... i can't seem to let this one go. even worse, from what i can tell of talking to her, she's not looking back for me at all. last time i talked to her (IM) she talked about a new guy she's liked for a long time, and how she longs to be with him. but can't because he's a military guy. *sigh

and so my mood and self-esteem continue to plummet. but i doubt anyone will read my blog, or especially this far so this might all be a mute point.

and if anyone reads this and cares/wants to know. i'm not unemotional. this post should tell that. also Crying


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