Florida has a FARK tag for a reason

I'm back to using sources!

So movies seem to be a huge way for state governments and municipalities to make money. The filming of them, anyway. So it's not unexpected for governments to offer tax breaks to filmmakers, whether those governments be states within the USA, or foreign governments abroad. Florida seems to have some strange way of "courting" the Hollywood types, though. Currently, Florida offers filmmakers a 2% tax break. But there's a bill barrelling through the legislature that would increase that to a 5% tax break, BUT that could be rescinded if the movie isn't "family-friendly" enough. What does this mean? Let's look at the language of the bill:

"...do not exhibit or imply any act of smoking, sex, nudity, nontraditional family values, gratuitous violence, or vulgar or profane language. Under the current incentive program, review of the final release version is not required and nontraditional family values, gratuitous violence, and implied acts do not exclude a film from receiving this additional credit."

What the ☺☺☺☺ are you smoking, Florida? Take a look at movies released this past year. The top three critically acclaimed movies all had at least the violence and language in them (I'm coming out and saying the top 3 are Avatar, The Hurt Locker, and Inglorious Basterds). If you want to keep out all movies that contain none of the above, all you're going to have are G-rated animated movies, and guess what? Travelling to Florida isn't required for that! You say you want to entice moviemakers to your state, but at the same time you fail to realize what goes into a movie these days. But you don't want to pay attention to the 21st century, do you? You want to:

“Think of it as like Mayberry,” Rep. Precourt said. “That’s when I grew up — the ’60s. That’s what life was like. I want Florida to be known for making those kinds of movies: Disney movies for kids and all that stuff. Like it used to be, you know?”

Sure, the 60s. Back when blacks were second-class citizens, at best. When women were paid pennies compared to men. When we had riots everywhere. These ☺☺☺☺ing MORONS just can't stand that time is moving forward, and they are trying like hell to pull it back.

But you want to go back to "traditional values"? Like those espoused in the ☺☺☺☺ing Bible? Fine then. Incest is legal. Rape isn't only legal, it's encouraged. In fact, we can combine the two! Slavery is fine as well! We can stone for "coveting thy neighbor's goods", right? Oh, wait, if we were able to do that then we'd have to stone the ☺☺☺☺ out of everybody, because that commandment goes against capitalism! Finally, let's peruse just a sampling of the ☺☺☺☺ that goes on in your "Bible":

Lot ☺☺☺☺ed his daughters after getting drunk. He also allowed them to get gang-raped in order to save a couple of people he never even ☺☺☺☺ing met. Ham gets cast out because Porky saw him naked. Blacks are said to be descended from Cain, and we all know what Cain did.

I guess my point to all this is: Florida is just a large pile of moronic asshats. You know what? I should get down there ASAP so I can film Brokeback Mountain II: Scissoring Sand-Filled Bitches.


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