I feel like people are being overly harsh. Having a card that dodges board wipes and provides card advantage (not just card quality like copter, but actual CA) has potential, especially at only 2 cmc. Imagine playing a fairly creature-light control deck with lots of wipes - this could be a good way to swing in and get cards after a wipe, while putting on some pressure. And there are a lot of wipes in standard right now...
Not saying it's amazing, but I wouldn't say it's terrible.
Honestly the reality of today's control is mostly creatureless, unless you are running Thief, at which point you wouldn't trade it's two power and effect for this submarine. This card is somehow a really terrible vehicle and would have been bad at colorless but at double blue, it's just actively trying to be bad
Assuming we get one for each God, Vizier of the Locust would have to be Red and Vizier of the Scarab would have to be blue, to maintain color balance, unless all viziers are naturally black. Locust granting haste would make sense and be reminiscent of the actual God. Who knows what Scarab would get
This isn't as high powered for a colored vehicle as we anticipated. Pretty high ceiling, pretty okay floor. Even then, I love that colored vehicles is where it's at now.
The reality is that we will probably get some minor bolas support in his colors ALA Dark Intimations. The only reason difference is they aren't being subtle about Bolas' involvement this time around so instead of minor support, it may be something more overt ala another Cruel Ultimatum variant that doesn't hit bolas (Hour of Devastation) or it may be something that helps in a Bolas deck (Augur of Bolas that can find a bolas card too)
If they do anything unique beyond the "loads of walkers" suspected theme (which would honestly be pretty fun in itself), I would be shocked
Honestly, if we can get a 2/1 white or red mentor one drop, then an actual Boros curve can grow out from there. I expect to see a 2/1 soldier of some kind with just mentor as an upside, and that's honestly all we need. If it's monowhite and a knight? Then we can build out some cross block synergy. This has uses but it really depends on how well we can support it
And here is Selesnya's value answer to Aggro, Control, and pretty much anything else. A 4/3 for 3 when you need a beater, a Reclamation Sage when you want it and a Lone Missionary when you need some life. This is honestly much better than I could have expected. Enchantment based removal is going to be hard pressed to run rampant if this is around
While I want to distance myself from your tone a little bit, you're right in that the current issue is how horrid answers are.
How are answers horrid? Unlicensed Disintegration destroys any creature except Hazoret or the random Rhonas that someone might be playing while Vraska's Contempt deals with anything that isn't hexproof--we might see some more Jade Guardians being played because of extra Merfolk support but there aren't many Carnage Tyrants running around. Some decks even have answers before the cards are even played--do you know how difficult it is for a God-Pharaoh's Gift deck to win after a turn 3 Dispossess has exiled all copies of the artifact? They might as well scoop.
Anyway...back to the ban announcement...Standard will become Pummeler and RDW, both of which can attain victory on turn 4 without answers in hand.
You're talking about 3 and 4 mana removal when the best threats are either 3 mana and below, or force you to play 4 mana removal to remove them on the the first place. I'm not sure you really understand the "standard has bad answers" argument since you are arguing against it when Wizards themselves have admitted the answers in standard were weak. Nobody runs dispossess in the main and in games 2-3 it's not like their curve goes above 5 mana anyway. They have no real reason to scoop.
It's weird you argue against bad answers in standard but then present two decks that you lose to if you don't have answers until turn 4
The card looks okay as a sorcery honestly.
If this was a 4/4 for 5 mana that dealt 4 damage when it came down, drained life, and milled 4, maybe we would look at it differently.
Honestly the reality of today's control is mostly creatureless, unless you are running Thief, at which point you wouldn't trade it's two power and effect for this submarine. This card is somehow a really terrible vehicle and would have been bad at colorless but at double blue, it's just actively trying to be bad
If they do anything unique beyond the "loads of walkers" suspected theme (which would honestly be pretty fun in itself), I would be shocked
You're talking about 3 and 4 mana removal when the best threats are either 3 mana and below, or force you to play 4 mana removal to remove them on the the first place. I'm not sure you really understand the "standard has bad answers" argument since you are arguing against it when Wizards themselves have admitted the answers in standard were weak. Nobody runs dispossess in the main and in games 2-3 it's not like their curve goes above 5 mana anyway. They have no real reason to scoop.
It's weird you argue against bad answers in standard but then present two decks that you lose to if you don't have answers until turn 4