MTG Salvation

Rage time.

First is Kosakosa. WHY IN THE NAME OF THE NINE DIVINES WOULD YOU SHOOT THE GUY WHO GAVE YOU A VIG SHOT.

AND WHY WOULDN'T YOU SHOOT ON LYLO.

Sorry about that, I just had to get it off my chest.

But the bigger problem was the setup as a whole. There is no world in which the scum can control two whole lynches with no outside help if one of them is also kill immune.

I am not counting this as a loss in my statistics because this game is so horrendously imbalanced.

YOURS TRULY stares at the PRINTOUTS. It couldn't be right, none of the VERACULAR SIMULATIONS could account for this.

Far away, the VICEROY sits watching AGENT DAWKINS, as the latter nibbles upon the CLOVER in the very inner chamber of the spun-down ORRERY. He moves the ROOK to E4.

YOURS TRULY notes the move, and flips the KING.

The VICEROY bolts upright. "Watch the place while I'm out, will you DAWKINS? That's a good AGENT."

He pulls on his ROGUISH BLAZER and makes his way among the chambers of the increasingly labyrinthine ORRERY. He left only a few chambers still active, but he had correctly foresaw the use of the WARP ROOM.

He enters and quickly adjusts KNOBS and DOODADS. He pulls a LEVER, and vanishes from the ORRERY.

YOURS TRULY welcomes the VICEROY to HELVETICA. "I just wish it were under different circumstances."

"Ragnor's defeat has led the ORRERY to become rather boring. I welcome the change of pace."

"Might I conjecture from events that you have a new PROPHECY?"

"Indeed, and this one may prove even more difficult to fulfill."

"Ah, but I welcome a good challenge."

"As do I. Did I mention how repetitive it gets when all there is to do is watch a bunny eat the carpet?"

---

Meanwhile, in the city of TOWN PORT, the NAUGHTILUS has just made port. Its SHRILL WHISTLE shrieks, and the PASSENGERS disembark.

NAUGHTILUS CAPTAIN SERGEI (NCS) surveys the city before him from the AFT DECK. A CREW MEMBER walks up to him after a moment. "A MISSIVE, sir, from DER KONIG."

NCS takes the MISSIVE and reads it over. "Ready th' rest o' th' crew. I be wantin' to parlay wi' th' mayor."

"Aye aye, sir." A CREW MEMBER scurries off.

NCS leaves the NAUGHTILUS.

----------------

Welcome to JURASSIC PARK ADVENTURE 2 MAFIA: FLAWLESS RIPE ORANGE!

> NEW GAME
> CONTINUE
> OPTIONS
> JURASSIC PARK ADVENTURE 1
> EXIT

What do you do?

>

Cirno is the strongest of all fairies, a feat which does not excuse her from having a spell card with a safe zone mere inches in front of her.

When fighting monsters, be sure to have a monster lord on your side.

Aliens are having teatime in the Earth Branch.

Why not bring back the PCQ as the overflow valve?

I've had a lot of fun playing with you, Void. Get well soon!

Quote from Prophylaxis

As a epilogue to my Steins;Gate ramblings over in the spectator chat...

Just watched the first episode and it looks good.

It only gets better.

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I for one welcome our new robot overlords. Or Mecha Shiva anyway.

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I'mma let you finish but Kanye West is scum IRL so expect my vote.

Click the image.

I use this:

The mysterious message arrived on your phone and flashed on the screen.

"Take the next flight to Paris. Opportunity of a lifetime. Not a hoax. Be there at 1800 hours local time. 15 others like you."

What the hell is this garbage? Some spam, promotional material? Probably advertising property or a new cruise line or something.

You move your thumb to the trash can icon, but pause.

The number.

There's no reply number.

Whatever. Probably some hacker bull**** or something. You start to press the delete button, when suddenly, the message changes before your very eyes.

"Don't touch that button. You are about to receive the greatest offer you could imagine."

Okay, now you're curious. How the hell did that message change? You scan your inbox, making sure you didn't just open another message without realizing it. Nope, nothing like that.

Intriguing.

You call up the airline company.

"Hello. I'd like to book the next flight to Paris."

-

You touch down in Paris, and another message lights up your phone.

"Meet at the Cafe des deux Moulins. Upstairs."

You go through customs uninhibited, grab your luggage, and call a cab. It's time to get to the bottom of this.

-

You enter the deserted cafe. Weird, isn't this place usually packed? You climb the staircase to the office space above the establishment and enter a room.

...

You count the people.

15. Just like the message said.

Everyone is chattering away, each apparently just as curious as you about the mysterious messages.

You hear a tapping noise and someone clear their throat. The chatter subsides

A man sitting in a high-backed office chair swivels around at a desk and turns to face all of you.

The man is a tad portly, with a blue pinstriped suit, a thin handlebar-styled moustache pointing slightly upwards, and a bowler hat that matched the suit.

He beams.

"I'm sure you're wondering why I've brought you all here."

Instantly, the questions begin. The man holds up his hands and the talk eventually fades again.

"Many of you have heard of the end of the world, I'm sure. Well, I have good news and bad news for you."

Pause.

"The bad news is, it's all true. Everyone is going to die."

The people in the room grew visibly angry and began to shout more questions. The man held his hands up again.

"-However, you have a chance to affect that. All of you are about to take a defining role in the history of humanity. I've selected 4 of you semi-randomly based on your, ah...talents...to serve me as my Horsemen. Famine, War, Pestilence, Death. 4 of you will gain the powers of the endtimes. The other 12...well, if you can weed out the ones I've chosen, congratulations. You save the earth for another 100 years until I decide to do this again. However, if you fail, the consequences will affect all of you and everyone you know (and even those you don't)."

One of the people stepped forward defiantly.

"And if we refuse?"

The man in the chair stood up, leaned on his elbows towards the speaker, and smiled again, his eyes flashing with a mischievous wickedness.

"You can't say no to me. I'm Apocalypse."

-

I can see it now, with dC multiquoting people in the same message.

I hate all of you.