Well, here it is. The story atleast one or two of you have been waiting to see... again. I'm still not sure how this got to be such a popular story. Perhaps it was the ethical and moral arguments it started the first time around. Either way, here it is.
Me and Charlie have been best friends for a long time. We've usually succeeded in whatever we've set out to do (aldeit with much dificulty) due to our diversity. Charlie is strong and athletic, and believes strongly in common sence. I am calculating and considered to be the brains of the outfit (even though Charlie owns me at chess for some reason) We are both equals at Magic in diferent ways: He likes big creatures, I like cheap counterspells. We also share the same view on an ideal called vengeance. Most people see it as "You do to me, I do to you", others see it as "You do to me, I do to you twice over", we see it as "Just don't do it to us". We've been to our fair share of card shops and we've come to learn that it's not the products that make the shop. Even the small ones with little to offer in merchandise had nice owners that we could chat with and people hanging out that we could play and trade with. Welcome to the exception...
I invited Charlie on a trip up to California with me for a couple weeks. After we got settled we began scanning the phone book for a card shop. We found one. It was only about a mile away from my grandparent's house so we walked. It was a small place, very cramped, and the only people there were the shop owner and his son. The owner was a big guy who looked like he hated everybody, a point he made clear through the mouth hidden under his long, unkempt beard. When we got there he stated that we had to first show him that we had money, or leave. I flashed a couple 20's and we were good. We listened to his 13 year old son tell us how skilled he was with a 9mm and that he could propobly pick us off from any distance, and that the sword on the wall was sharp enough to kill us in an istant. We decided to splurge and put our money together to box a Judgment booster box, $100 even. We hand him the money and he takes it, but instead of getting our box, we get a nice look down the barrel of the rifle he keeps in his store for "protection". He tells us to get the Hell out 'cause he "see us stillin stuff" and we aint gettin' our money back. We tried to argue until we heard the rifle lock and saw the kid reaching under a desk for something. So, we leave.
Later that night I come up with a crazy idea. I tell Charlie it'll be the biggest thing we've ever done. Let's hit the shop. At first he laughs at me and calls me an idiot, saying we'll never pull it off. I know he wants to, after reminding him about his stolen $50, a gun to the head, and basically being treated like crap from someone we've never met (and his son). Finally, I convince him. We'll do it Saturday night. My grandparents went to bed around 10:00, and we left at midnight. We brought two backpacks, a duffle bag, small screwdrivers for lock-picking, and two chocolate Slimfasts because they taste good. So, right off the bat we're breaking curfew laws by walking down the freeway at 12:00 in the morning. We finally arrive. The shop is in a shopping center and every store in the center has a back garage-like door, leading to their respective storage rooms. We go around back to find that every light back there is out, except for the one right above the card shop's backdoor. Luckily, the lock on the door was already damaged... however it was the only door with a lock on it. We realize that picking the lock is no good and that we need different tools. We go back home. After getting the tools we need (and a drink) we set off again, arriving at about 2:30 AM. This time the lock comes off, but not with out a huge bang. We run behind a dumpster and wait awhile, then get to work on the now unlocked door. For one, the handle had been broken off, so we had to lift from the bottom. Second, boxes had wedged the shut from the inside! We push until a box moves and the door flies up with another bang! We hide, and come back to find that the door has only gone up about two feet. This process repeats for about an hour. With the door lifted only about four feet, and a wall of boxes behind it, we sit in defeat and disgrace. Leave it to Charlie to lean against a box and knock it over revealing a crawlspace right into the shop! The "unloading" process only take about 3 minutes (we were scared!) then we're off. Imagine if you, two suspicious looking teenagers walking down a California highway with packed dufflebags at 3:30 in the morning. We actually walked passed two vacant cop cars. We get home at about 4:00 and start dividing the bounty. Then, just as we finish hiding it away, my grandma comes out and, get this, we all go to church. Needless to say we didn't leave the house again for the remainder of the trip. All-in-all we came out with:
2 Scourge Boxes
2 Legions Boxes
1 Judgement Box (Which we technically paid for)
2 Boxes of Onslaught Pre-cons
3 Boxes of Oddessy Expert packs
1 Box of 7th Ed
1 Box of 6th Ed
About 180 rares, none worth mentioning
And 6 of those long cardboxes full of commons and uncommons (and hidden rares) of every color...
Understandable and will be taken into consideration. However those threads will still be closed, and warnings will be issued a) To those who spammed the thread or b) If the thread was spam to start. I wont be heartless, but I wont let this end up like 'news either.
For the time being I'm going to be pretty lenient on rules in the humor forums. HOWEVER, that doesn't mean there wont be any. All rules of the forums apply here, and I'll be keeping a close watch on all threads that are made here. My ground rules are:
-Anything posted here that is NOT YOUR OWN WORK must be credited to the place you got it from. I like to promote creativity here, but if you must, give credit.
-I'll be keeping a VERY close watch on #### threads. If one gets out of hand, the culprits will recieve a spam warning and the thread will be closed.
-Critism is welcome, but only if it's constructive! "Your story sucked!" wont fly. "Your story sucked, here's why, here's what you can do to make it better" is fine. Flamers will indeed recieve flame warnings.
-Please, try to keep all humor at a PG-13 level
As for now, that's about it. Just be smart and have fun.
Me and Charlie have been best friends for a long time. We've usually succeeded in whatever we've set out to do (aldeit with much dificulty) due to our diversity. Charlie is strong and athletic, and believes strongly in common sence. I am calculating and considered to be the brains of the outfit (even though Charlie owns me at chess for some reason) We are both equals at Magic in diferent ways: He likes big creatures, I like cheap counterspells. We also share the same view on an ideal called vengeance. Most people see it as "You do to me, I do to you", others see it as "You do to me, I do to you twice over", we see it as "Just don't do it to us". We've been to our fair share of card shops and we've come to learn that it's not the products that make the shop. Even the small ones with little to offer in merchandise had nice owners that we could chat with and people hanging out that we could play and trade with. Welcome to the exception...
I invited Charlie on a trip up to California with me for a couple weeks. After we got settled we began scanning the phone book for a card shop. We found one. It was only about a mile away from my grandparent's house so we walked. It was a small place, very cramped, and the only people there were the shop owner and his son. The owner was a big guy who looked like he hated everybody, a point he made clear through the mouth hidden under his long, unkempt beard. When we got there he stated that we had to first show him that we had money, or leave. I flashed a couple 20's and we were good. We listened to his 13 year old son tell us how skilled he was with a 9mm and that he could propobly pick us off from any distance, and that the sword on the wall was sharp enough to kill us in an istant. We decided to splurge and put our money together to box a Judgment booster box, $100 even. We hand him the money and he takes it, but instead of getting our box, we get a nice look down the barrel of the rifle he keeps in his store for "protection". He tells us to get the Hell out 'cause he "see us stillin stuff" and we aint gettin' our money back. We tried to argue until we heard the rifle lock and saw the kid reaching under a desk for something. So, we leave.
Later that night I come up with a crazy idea. I tell Charlie it'll be the biggest thing we've ever done. Let's hit the shop. At first he laughs at me and calls me an idiot, saying we'll never pull it off. I know he wants to, after reminding him about his stolen $50, a gun to the head, and basically being treated like crap from someone we've never met (and his son). Finally, I convince him. We'll do it Saturday night. My grandparents went to bed around 10:00, and we left at midnight. We brought two backpacks, a duffle bag, small screwdrivers for lock-picking, and two chocolate Slimfasts because they taste good. So, right off the bat we're breaking curfew laws by walking down the freeway at 12:00 in the morning. We finally arrive. The shop is in a shopping center and every store in the center has a back garage-like door, leading to their respective storage rooms. We go around back to find that every light back there is out, except for the one right above the card shop's backdoor. Luckily, the lock on the door was already damaged... however it was the only door with a lock on it. We realize that picking the lock is no good and that we need different tools. We go back home. After getting the tools we need (and a drink) we set off again, arriving at about 2:30 AM. This time the lock comes off, but not with out a huge bang. We run behind a dumpster and wait awhile, then get to work on the now unlocked door. For one, the handle had been broken off, so we had to lift from the bottom. Second, boxes had wedged the shut from the inside! We push until a box moves and the door flies up with another bang! We hide, and come back to find that the door has only gone up about two feet. This process repeats for about an hour. With the door lifted only about four feet, and a wall of boxes behind it, we sit in defeat and disgrace. Leave it to Charlie to lean against a box and knock it over revealing a crawlspace right into the shop! The "unloading" process only take about 3 minutes (we were scared!) then we're off. Imagine if you, two suspicious looking teenagers walking down a California highway with packed dufflebags at 3:30 in the morning. We actually walked passed two vacant cop cars. We get home at about 4:00 and start dividing the bounty. Then, just as we finish hiding it away, my grandma comes out and, get this, we all go to church. Needless to say we didn't leave the house again for the remainder of the trip. All-in-all we came out with:
2 Scourge Boxes
2 Legions Boxes
1 Judgement Box (Which we technically paid for)
2 Boxes of Onslaught Pre-cons
3 Boxes of Oddessy Expert packs
1 Box of 7th Ed
1 Box of 6th Ed
About 180 rares, none worth mentioning
And 6 of those long cardboxes full of commons and uncommons (and hidden rares) of every color...
...And they pure disbelief of success!
-Anything posted here that is NOT YOUR OWN WORK must be credited to the place you got it from. I like to promote creativity here, but if you must, give credit.
-I'll be keeping a VERY close watch on #### threads. If one gets out of hand, the culprits will recieve a spam warning and the thread will be closed.
-Critism is welcome, but only if it's constructive! "Your story sucked!" wont fly. "Your story sucked, here's why, here's what you can do to make it better" is fine. Flamers will indeed recieve flame warnings.
-Please, try to keep all humor at a PG-13 level
As for now, that's about it. Just be smart and have fun.
-Wolfwood