A guy moved to our school the other year from Singapore, and my friend group decided to take him in so he wasn't all by himself. Over the past couple of years we've come to realise that there's something wrong with him.
First and foremost, he's 19 years old (a year older than the rest of us) and has spoken English his whole life, so it's not some sort of language barrier.
He has a MASSIVE tendency to be both unbelievably socially awkward and to fall in love with people way too young for him. It has gotten to the stage where he falls in love with 14 year old girls that he has observed daily at the train station and after a couple of years of doing nothing now on a couple of occassion he has run up to them, said he loves them and then literally run away. He doesn't realise how weird that is, no matter how much we tell him.
Secondly, his level of thinking and maturity is unbelievably... low. For example, its as if recently he has discovered how to make jokes. But... really basic ones which he finds hilarious. For example, I have a friend named Simon Green... "Hey... why was Simon green? BECAUSE HE WAS SIMON GREEN!" or my friend Rachael Baker... "Hey... why was Rachael making bread? BECAUSE RACHAEL BAKER!".
My friends and I have tolerated this for a couple of years now, but we really don't know what we should be doing about this. What would you guys suggest?
I want to stop all the advice for a second and open the question because the answers given so far assume too much.
What about marketing attracts you and why do you like it?
What role in the field of marketing do you want to play?
What type of marketing?
What is marketing in your opinion?
I like the creative aspect of things, and if I'm going to be honest, I guess there's a "sadistic" side of me that enjoys trying to convince people to purchase a product/service.
I'd prefer to be involved with promotion - advertising and that sort of thing.
Creative marketing? - I guess I'm not well enough educated about the field to make a proper response to that.
Management of all aspects of a product, its placement, pricing etc. to tailor it towards the target market and increase market share/profits?
I've always been super interested in, and wanted to go into marketing as a profession. I know this might be the commonly sprouted line, but my interest lies predominantly in creative marketing.
Going into Uni next year, the course that looks attractive to me is a double degree: Bachelor in Commerce (majoring in Marketing) and Psychology.
While this is certainly what interests me most, I spose I should consider my potential for getting employed after Uni - do any of you with more experience than myself in the area of business and particularly marketing have anything to say about my degree idea?
Lately I've noticed that the website Twitter does not load on my phone or computer (connected to the home WiFi) at night, starting at a seemingly random time. Tonight neither Twitter nor Facebook will load. I have spoken to my dad who says that he hasn't put any restrictions or blocks in to the router that would do this, which makes sense seeing the time they stop working throughout the night seems to be rather random.
I'm doing my VERY best not to lead her on (and I know, the longer before I send any strong signals the worse it gets). But I really don't feel like being that blunt is the best thing to do.
So this is a weird situation for me, but of course it's very common. There's this girl I met VERY briefly at a music festival the other day. She was my best friend's sister's friend which adds a layer of weirdness. Anyway, I get home and she's added me on Facebook. Fair enough. Then she messaged me to ask me how I enjoyed the festival. I replied, we talked music briefly. Fair enough. Then she said something like, "Apart from having great taste in music and being incredibly humourous, what else do you do?" And I could see what was gonna happen from there in! I tried to end the convo, and said I was going to bed. Today at school around midday she messages me to tell me how she went in an assignment. We never discussed school or anything to do with said assignment once! Then I got home, congratulated her and we kept talking and just then she told me that her data was running out so I should text her, then she gave me her number.
I told her I was just on my way out to do some football training (first thing I thought of), and she said that I should text her whenever then.
I have no idea how to KINDLY let her know I'm not interested. I really feel bad just doing something rash like ignoring her or something because I've been in her position before. Right now I have another girl I went out with once, and another girl who I have a lot of history with and everyone thinks we're basically married but the truth is way more complicated and I constantly switch between hating and loving her [another story for another time]. In other words, I have enough girl problems as there is! I'm slightly freaking out about what to do now.
I tried this ONCE, and although things seemed to be going well - in the end I was just her emotional sponge, someone to dump all of her negative energy on (while I made her feel better about herself etc.) and then when she was done she got another boyfriend that wasn't me. A waste of your time and energy.
If my GF started working at City beach, supre, red zoo or any of those stores filled with idiotic girls I would tell her to stay true to herself
You can imagine my pain when she says she's gonna start working their five days a week for the next four weeks... I feel like she might just turn into a different person!
So my girlfriend works at City Beach - a clothes store. Now I'll preface everything by saying that OF COURSE I know it really shouldn't matter what I think about where she works, it's her life, but that doesn't mean I feel any better about it nor want to do something about it. So let me dive into my complaints.
Firstly and fore-mostly, this job and the people she works with have tainted her. Oh yes, how judgemental of me to say so -but it's what I feel. The girls she works with are all, dare I say it, "****ty" and as being as much is basically part of her job description its starting to rub off on her. She's started hanging out with her friends from work more and more than her friends from school (who generally seem to be nicer people and care about her more). Her friends from work are the kind to go out and get drunk and rowdy in the city on a weekend, and my girlfriend - although undoubtedly the most awesome person I've ever met - has started to slip a little bit into the sort of girl that I usually just can't stand and worries me.
It's not just the girls - there are a few other shifty people there. She recently got high with her boss in a park... the next month her boss got fired and prosecuted for STEALING $10 000 from the business. It just seems that no-one from that store is a good influence, and usually the opposite. And yes, I feel bad just typing this - who am I to tell her who her friends should be? But I still feel like there must be some way I can get her to see this, because I know she can do better.
Secondly, and on a different note completely, she's starting to work WAY too much. We're coming into our final year of school here in Australia - ahead of us are the most important 3 terms of our lives... and yet she's taking on more workload than ever.
Now, while I am quite proud of how hard she's working and how she's speeding up the hierarchy at work, I feel like she should reassess her priorities for now. She's a very talented girl and very smart too - she can go well in school when she puts her mind to it - but she has lost confidence in herself. She's almost given up on her High School Certificate already. During January she's accepted a temporary promotion which will have her working full time for 4 weeks. This is during the holidays, which is no real problem in terms of school but it does reflect her attitude to everything. She's given up on school and is completely jumping head first into more and more work - money is starting to rule her world.
I understand that this could be the path she wants to take with life - but I know her, and I know deep down it isn't. She had dreams, but now she's forgotten about them and has become a slave to money and debt. I want to get her back on track, AT LEAST for this final 3 terms of school so she can have no regrets and do her best.
I'm not sure what I can do, or perhaps more importantly IF I SHOULD do anything about either of these two things. I know it's her life, and her decisions but I care for her and it's still eating me up.
I think I played it off by also doing the teeth thing and then asking her what she would call that and moving on from there.
Something I left out is the fact that the formal is next year! She was being really preemptive...
I feel like she doesn't like me. I know for sure that if I liked a girl I wouldn't go on to her about all the cute injokes and dates I had with another girl. **** that. I'm sick of constantly falling into her trap... I can't even ask her out because of this whole grounded thing she's got going...
Don't fall into the trap that a number of people think every time a topic like this pops up.
What do you say is doubtful? And what trap.
Ugh... there was even a moment where she was like, "A friend who saw us just then just texted me and said, 'good work' - she thinks we're together [then she did this weird inhaling thing through her teeth], and when I I dropped my bags off at work my boss thought we were together too and I was like [she did the noise thing again, aha, it's hard to explain]." I kinda played along, not knowing what the right thing is to do there.
Guys, while I've read all of and appreciate the comments - and a lot of your optimism, I feel like I'm just a friend.
We ran into each other today and walked around and talked for an hour or so - almost the first discussion we had was about an injoke she has with the other guy. Later on I find out they're going to the movies this week. I asked her to the movies a few days ago, but she is grounded and said that she was only allowed to goto one movie which she was already going to - I didn't know it was with the other guy until today. I guess I'm just her ticket to my school's formal. It annoys me that she can lead me on so much and not even realise it...
First and foremost, he's 19 years old (a year older than the rest of us) and has spoken English his whole life, so it's not some sort of language barrier.
He has a MASSIVE tendency to be both unbelievably socially awkward and to fall in love with people way too young for him. It has gotten to the stage where he falls in love with 14 year old girls that he has observed daily at the train station and after a couple of years of doing nothing now on a couple of occassion he has run up to them, said he loves them and then literally run away. He doesn't realise how weird that is, no matter how much we tell him.
Secondly, his level of thinking and maturity is unbelievably... low. For example, its as if recently he has discovered how to make jokes. But... really basic ones which he finds hilarious. For example, I have a friend named Simon Green... "Hey... why was Simon green? BECAUSE HE WAS SIMON GREEN!" or my friend Rachael Baker... "Hey... why was Rachael making bread? BECAUSE RACHAEL BAKER!".
My friends and I have tolerated this for a couple of years now, but we really don't know what we should be doing about this. What would you guys suggest?
I like the creative aspect of things, and if I'm going to be honest, I guess there's a "sadistic" side of me that enjoys trying to convince people to purchase a product/service.
I'd prefer to be involved with promotion - advertising and that sort of thing.
Creative marketing? - I guess I'm not well enough educated about the field to make a proper response to that.
Management of all aspects of a product, its placement, pricing etc. to tailor it towards the target market and increase market share/profits?
I've always been super interested in, and wanted to go into marketing as a profession. I know this might be the commonly sprouted line, but my interest lies predominantly in creative marketing.
Going into Uni next year, the course that looks attractive to me is a double degree: Bachelor in Commerce (majoring in Marketing) and Psychology.
While this is certainly what interests me most, I spose I should consider my potential for getting employed after Uni - do any of you with more experience than myself in the area of business and particularly marketing have anything to say about my degree idea?
Cheers!
Lately I've noticed that the website Twitter does not load on my phone or computer (connected to the home WiFi) at night, starting at a seemingly random time. Tonight neither Twitter nor Facebook will load. I have spoken to my dad who says that he hasn't put any restrictions or blocks in to the router that would do this, which makes sense seeing the time they stop working throughout the night seems to be rather random.
Does anyone know what this could be?
Cheers.
I told her I was just on my way out to do some football training (first thing I thought of), and she said that I should text her whenever then.
I have no idea how to KINDLY let her know I'm not interested. I really feel bad just doing something rash like ignoring her or something because I've been in her position before. Right now I have another girl I went out with once, and another girl who I have a lot of history with and everyone thinks we're basically married but the truth is way more complicated and I constantly switch between hating and loving her [another story for another time]. In other words, I have enough girl problems as there is! I'm slightly freaking out about what to do now.
Advice would be appreciated, cheers.
It was more the fact that she was with her boss - which seems like a terrible idea.
You can imagine my pain when she says she's gonna start working their five days a week for the next four weeks... I feel like she might just turn into a different person!
Firstly and fore-mostly, this job and the people she works with have tainted her. Oh yes, how judgemental of me to say so -but it's what I feel. The girls she works with are all, dare I say it, "****ty" and as being as much is basically part of her job description its starting to rub off on her. She's started hanging out with her friends from work more and more than her friends from school (who generally seem to be nicer people and care about her more). Her friends from work are the kind to go out and get drunk and rowdy in the city on a weekend, and my girlfriend - although undoubtedly the most awesome person I've ever met - has started to slip a little bit into the sort of girl that I usually just can't stand and worries me.
It's not just the girls - there are a few other shifty people there. She recently got high with her boss in a park... the next month her boss got fired and prosecuted for STEALING $10 000 from the business. It just seems that no-one from that store is a good influence, and usually the opposite. And yes, I feel bad just typing this - who am I to tell her who her friends should be? But I still feel like there must be some way I can get her to see this, because I know she can do better.
Secondly, and on a different note completely, she's starting to work WAY too much. We're coming into our final year of school here in Australia - ahead of us are the most important 3 terms of our lives... and yet she's taking on more workload than ever.
Now, while I am quite proud of how hard she's working and how she's speeding up the hierarchy at work, I feel like she should reassess her priorities for now. She's a very talented girl and very smart too - she can go well in school when she puts her mind to it - but she has lost confidence in herself. She's almost given up on her High School Certificate already. During January she's accepted a temporary promotion which will have her working full time for 4 weeks. This is during the holidays, which is no real problem in terms of school but it does reflect her attitude to everything. She's given up on school and is completely jumping head first into more and more work - money is starting to rule her world.
I understand that this could be the path she wants to take with life - but I know her, and I know deep down it isn't. She had dreams, but now she's forgotten about them and has become a slave to money and debt. I want to get her back on track, AT LEAST for this final 3 terms of school so she can have no regrets and do her best.
I'm not sure what I can do, or perhaps more importantly IF I SHOULD do anything about either of these two things. I know it's her life, and her decisions but I care for her and it's still eating me up.
I think I played it off by also doing the teeth thing and then asking her what she would call that and moving on from there.
Something I left out is the fact that the formal is next year! She was being really preemptive...
I feel like she doesn't like me. I know for sure that if I liked a girl I wouldn't go on to her about all the cute injokes and dates I had with another girl. **** that. I'm sick of constantly falling into her trap... I can't even ask her out because of this whole grounded thing she's got going...
What do you say is doubtful? And what trap.
Ugh... there was even a moment where she was like, "A friend who saw us just then just texted me and said, 'good work' - she thinks we're together [then she did this weird inhaling thing through her teeth], and when I I dropped my bags off at work my boss thought we were together too and I was like [she did the noise thing again, aha, it's hard to explain]." I kinda played along, not knowing what the right thing is to do there.
We ran into each other today and walked around and talked for an hour or so - almost the first discussion we had was about an injoke she has with the other guy. Later on I find out they're going to the movies this week. I asked her to the movies a few days ago, but she is grounded and said that she was only allowed to goto one movie which she was already going to - I didn't know it was with the other guy until today. I guess I'm just her ticket to my school's formal. It annoys me that she can lead me on so much and not even realise it...