sorry for the confusion. My initial critique was incorrect, as I was trying to finish those off quickly, and did not want to explain myself as much as I ought to. My response in this thread was less a contradiction than an explanation. I quite like your designs over the course of this project, and I was not trying to delegitize your design style. I am, as you said, a noob, and still trying to figure out the etiquette of critiques.
That is still an excessive amount of set up and probably card disadvantage, as well as costing you the board presence you need to y'know, actually get value out of his first. Not to mention that that was one of many problems I had with this card, such as why he is abzan. All of his mechanics are G/B.
Yes, then you need to run sac outlets in your presumably mill/counters based deck, sac two non-token creatures on your turn, be okay with having one of them bounced to your hand and effectively losing your draw to set up nissa, voice of zendikar's -2. I am not trying to be sarcastic, and the card has some interesting ideas, especially with flavor, but the abilities seem to be pulling in four opposing directions at once. Setting up the Ult I can kind of see, however the only thing you really get out of that is repeating ETBs, at the cost of reducing your graveyard size (for the ult) and board presence (for the first).
She has basically nothing aside from her backstory to distinguish her from any Chandra, who even herself is considered the most unoriginal of the Gatewatch. Not only is she a spellslinger, she is burn-oriented spellslinger. The mechanics are ok, but nothing terribly flavorful or original.
I like the second passive ability. It is an interesting and creative way of having a plus ability, without having an actual plus ability. However, the ability to ult him the turn you cast him fairly easily combined with an I-win ult just seems unfun even at seven. Karn makes you work far harder for his wincon ult, and I hear few complaints that he is underpowered.
The flavor is strong with this one. I like how he uses X for something other than loyalty counters, and hints at an interesting outside mechanic (ice), without depending on external counter sources. My only real complaint is the keyword salad; detain and exert felt unnecessary.
I how you tied your character to canon, without breaking the rules of the challenge. The theme of 4 is a nice bit of design elegance as well, and she aptly captures the feel of the Azorius. My main issue is the similarity to Dovin Baan, especially in the ultimate.
Good beastmaster flavor, and the ult setting the power of all of your creatures to 5 is a great callback to Naya. The second abilityis my favorite, it makes me envision Shalin just lassoeing some monster. The exert is used well here, to add a controlling white element to a classic red effect, as well as the green buff. However, the first ability is a tad clunky for basically an emergent growth
This has a decent idea, an Aven from Tarkir digging into the past, however it is plagued by little issues that add up. Firstly,
why is he Abzan? Not only is self-mill odd in white, it explicitly belongs to another clan, the Sultai. Nonetheless, the first ability uses it well and ties it to the abzan theme, +1/+1 counters. The second ability suffers from the fact that it looks like it want to synergize with the first or ultimate, but in actuality, unless you can do it at instant speed, you will draw the creature before you mill it. Aside from that failed synergy, it does not otherwise connect to the flavor or mechanics of the card. The ult is kind of interesting, however the fact that it pulls from the library instead of the graveyard puts it at odds with what the card is about. Portost seems like he wants you to take time crafting your GY, only to use your deck instead where it counts.
Gerula, the Incompleat 1BR
Legendary Planeswalker-Gerula MR
+1: Until your next turn, whenever you or Gerula are dealt damage, you may draw a card. If you do, discard a card.
-X: Put a creature card from your hand with converted mana cost X or less onto the battlefield. That creature gains haste. Sacrifice the creature at the beginning of the next end step.
-4: You get an emblem with "Creatures you control have haste. You may cast creature cards from your graveyard. At the beginning of your end step, sacrifice all creatures you control."
[3]
Gerula's Tormentor 2BR
Creature-Nightmare Horror (U)
Whenever you pay life, Gerula's Tormenter deal 1 damage to each opponent
Pay 2 life: Gerula's Tormentor gains lifelink until end of turn. Activate this ability only once each turn. You will become what you have fled. So run, and leave a trail of oil shining in your wake. -Azax-Azog
3/4
Gerula, the Incompleat 1BR
Legendary Planeswalker-Gerula MR
+1: Until your next turn, whenever you or Gerula are dealt damage, you may draw a card. If you do, discard a card.
-X: Put a creature card from your hand with converted mana cost X or less onto the battlefield. That creature gains haste. Sacrifice the creature at the beginning of the next end step.
-4: You get an emblem with "Creatures you control have haste. You may cast creature cards from your graveyard. At the beginning of your end step, sacrifice all creatures you control."
[3]
Name: Gerula Shadrach
Race: Neurok (mostly)
Plane: New Phyrexia
Ineffable Blessing 1G
enchantment R
When Ineffable Blessing enters the battlefield, choose flavorful or bland
The entire UB faction is inspector gadget/austin powers.
why is he Abzan? Not only is self-mill odd in white, it explicitly belongs to another clan, the Sultai. Nonetheless, the first ability uses it well and ties it to the abzan theme, +1/+1 counters. The second ability suffers from the fact that it looks like it want to synergize with the first or ultimate, but in actuality, unless you can do it at instant speed, you will draw the creature before you mill it. Aside from that failed synergy, it does not otherwise connect to the flavor or mechanics of the card. The ult is kind of interesting, however the fact that it pulls from the library instead of the graveyard puts it at odds with what the card is about. Portost seems like he wants you to take time crafting your GY, only to use your deck instead where it counts.
2 RaikouRider
3 Antiantiserum
Legendary Planeswalker-Gerula MR
+1: Until your next turn, whenever you or Gerula are dealt damage, you may draw a card. If you do, discard a card.
-X: Put a creature card from your hand with converted mana cost X or less onto the battlefield. That creature gains haste. Sacrifice the creature at the beginning of the next end step.
-4: You get an emblem with "Creatures you control have haste. You may cast creature cards from your graveyard. At the beginning of your end step, sacrifice all creatures you control."
[3]
Gerula's Tormentor 2BR
Creature-Nightmare Horror (U)
Whenever you pay life, Gerula's Tormenter deal 1 damage to each opponent
Pay 2 life: Gerula's Tormentor gains lifelink until end of turn. Activate this ability only once each turn.
You will become what you have fled. So run, and leave a trail of oil shining in your wake. -Azax-Azog
3/4
Legendary Planeswalker-Gerula MR
+1: Until your next turn, whenever you or Gerula are dealt damage, you may draw a card. If you do, discard a card.
-X: Put a creature card from your hand with converted mana cost X or less onto the battlefield. That creature gains haste. Sacrifice the creature at the beginning of the next end step.
-4: You get an emblem with "Creatures you control have haste. You may cast creature cards from your graveyard. At the beginning of your end step, sacrifice all creatures you control."
[3]
Name: Gerula Shadrach
Race: Neurok (mostly)
Plane: New Phyrexia