Ray of Enfeeblement, a ray should target only a single creature, I'd go with wave.
Dwarven Ballista shouldn't be restricted to attacking and blocking creatures, thats whites thing. Also should probably deal 2 damage to you to balance.
Sage Advice, Presence of the Wise isn't exactly a powerhouse, a strictly better version should be fine try 2(G/W)
Goblin Lobbers is an incredibly powerful ability. Even as a 1/3 I'm hesitant to say it isn't too strong
Tree Serpent, I really like this card, but why Guile?
My point was (I should have been clearer about this) that we tend to get at least one meaningful character death per block – that is, a protagonist of some story significance dying onscreen. Villains, non-sapient beings (animals), and offscreen deaths don’t really count. Reanimated characters should not count if the character is still more or less the same person as before (Anafenza and Sidisi are like this, Mikaeus is not). That gives us:
SOM: Venser
INN: Mikaeus (reanimated but lost all personality and such in the process, unlike Sidisi and Anafenza)
RTR: Melek (relatively minor character, but still)
THS: Elspeth and Daxos (also reanimated later but lost his soul and most of his personality)
KTK: Shu Yun and Reyhan
ORI: Kiran Nalaar
BFZ: No one
SOI: Avacyn and Brisela (arguable: technically villains, but former protagonists)
KLD: No one
So we shifted from 6/6 before BFZ to 1/3 (or 0/3) since.
I think we might have a problem here, especially if Amonkhet is similarly lacking in death for our protagonists.
Mikaeus did not play a role in INN and Melek's only role was to stand still while Ral killed him. Daxos is gone though not dead so that counts but Elspeth has all but been assured to come back. Personally I don't count any of the people that were introduced in FRF because we knew they were all dead already, though we can count Shu Yun because they got a card and died on screen while Reyhan didn't get a card till later so it doesn't seem right to count. So with an average of 1 death per block we are well within the average for post origins with Avacyn, Gisela, and Bruna all dying in the same block. Once they have strayed form the average it would be time to worry about no one ever dying but until then these claims are premature at best.
Planeswalker deaths are probably a thing of the past, but if you look at legendary creature deaths too for the last few years, there is clearly some decline happening.
Deaths by block since SOM (offscreen deaths, villain deaths, animal deaths, and deaths followed by reanimation marked; characters without cards excluded):
SOM: Venser, Glissa compleated
INN: Mikaeus (reanimated), Griselbrand (villain)
RTR: Melek
THS: Polukranos (animal), Daxos (reanimated), Elspeth, Xenagos (villain)
KTK: Daghatar (offscreen), Shu Yun, Tasigur, Alesha (offscreen), Yasova (offscreen), Reyhan, Shidiqi (offscreen), Anafenza (offscreen, reanimated), Sidisi (offscreen, reanimated), Ugin (reanimated)
ORI: Kiran Nalaar, Kothoped (villain), Alhammaret (villain)
BFZ: Lorthos (animal, no new card), Ulamog (villain) and Kozilek (villain)
SOI: Avacyn and Brisela (both villains)
KLD: No one
I have some problems with this list. First, if a character gets a card but never plays a role in the story do they really count as a nonredshirt? Second, why are you counting Glissa who isn't dead? Third you are massively padding KTK's numbers by counting people who died 'offscreen' but thousands of years ago. As well as characters who are still 'active' and the same alligence though dead and characters who got cards after the set.
So other than KLD there don't appear to be any decline in deaths. Especially if you don't count the characters that death wasn't an end point.
Inspiring Statuary will let you tap artifacts to pay for an emerged Elder Deep-Fiend. However it will not help with Metalwork Colossus, though that is because the statue only gives improvise to non artifacts.
So one or two (or even five or six) main characters predictably surviving the conflict is forgivable. Dozens of side characters all coincidentally surviving the same (very lethal) conflict is not. Plot armor for a few (with practical reason) is acceptable, if a little uninteresting. Plot armor for every protagonist removes all sense of risk and unpredictability from the story. And that, in my opinion, is unacceptable.
I fully agree. I doubt audiences would have believed the risk of the assault on the Death Star if every Rebel pilot survived.
You know what I think this is? Wizards is being so gentle with the characters because they've taken the wrong lessons from the past. They've seen people get upset when fan-favorites like Venser or Elspeth get killed off, so now they just won't.
So like how every roil shaper died but Dolan? If all you want is countless redshirt dying then BFZ had plenty of that (that's about all it had). I don't remember Thalia's army having named characters to meaningfully die but that one vampire that almost seemed like they mattered died against Nahiri.
So based on what people said almost no running story regularly kills anyone of any significance, but they regularly kill irrelevant redshirts that they occasionally shine a spotlight on just before they die to trick you into thinking they aren't a redshirt.
I hate to bring this up again but it needs to be said: no one is dying. At all. Since Origins only four characters with cards have died: Avacyn, Brisela, Kozilek, and Ulamog. That's all. Only antagonists. And no one at all in Kaladesh.
It honestly feels like these stories are being written for eight year olds who can't handle any of their favorite characters dying. As the story needed anything else to make it feel more like a superhero comic for children than a legitimate fantasy story.
If no one is killed by Bolas in Amonkhet, not a single named character, then I'm done with the story.
I've never really understood this stance. What long running serializations kill off characters with any regularity(besides GoT Way too many people die in that, it seems more for shock than plot most times)?
I don't want to sound rude or condescending I'm honestly curious because enough people here have voiced such an opinion that it leads me to believe that (semi-main or important side)characters do in fact die fairly often in other stories that I simply don't read. I'm open to the possibility that I don't expose myself to the proper sources but currently it just sounds ridiculous that no one goes about killing important characters with any regularity(besides that one) and a significant number of people expect it here.
If you just mean significant consequences like death then I can understand where you're coming from a bit better, but considering we're still on only the third story it still seems rather premature.
OK, I get what your doing with dominion now. Though now that I understand I don't like it at all. I would like to offer a fix but it may change the functionality too much. So a clarification on how your using it. Do you only care when something has the highest dominion? Do you ever care about the specific amount of dominion? Do you care about positions other than highest?
If you only ever care who has the highest then the best rework I have is you scrap the dominion count and change it to a status like monarch that cares about colored permanents. That way cards will care if their color has dominion and it is backwards compatible.
If you use it in a wider range then I have no good fixes.
I forgot to mention plot, it is annoyingly complex. If you just want to add temporary draw to your set then it may be best to just copy Commune with Lava template and leave it at that.
Edit: I did not see the face down part of Plot. The actual rules for plot would need a mention of the fact that you can look at the face down cards otherwise you wouldn't be able to cast them. This is weird. I understand that you want it to be secret but it makes it incredibly awkward with the limited cast window. You can keep them face down but I really feel the need to push you towards letting you cast them immediately and until the end of your next turn. This will make the ability stronger but not significantly and add a very strong bluff feature to them which is quite exciting.
I'm going to ignore powerlevel because that looks tricky here.
I like everything about Brithright but the name. The name doesn't have the I care about others of my type feel to it, which is what the ability is. I don't currently have a suggestion to change it just pointing out the disconnect between flavor and function.
Contract looks good but I think it would open more design space if it triggered on any combat damage, not just to players. This makes it so your cards are more like Cinder Wall one shot combat effects but stapled onto a body with static abilities makes it more interesting.
I don't get Dominion's function on a card like Blade of the Hand. If I understood correctly which ever color has the most permanents on the battlefield has Dominion or Dominion is just the number of a color's permanents on the battlefield. So does Hand add two to the count of Dominion? If not then what? If so, is it worth it?
I'd like to help with this format but there are some big problems that fixing might ruin your format. So I think the best thing right now is for you to lay out exactly what you want your format to be.
The land problem is probably the biggest for this format. As is, mono color aggressive decks are king. Through most of, if not the entire game players will only be casting one spell a turn. Being locked into a single color, options are limited you either play all of the biggest creatures so you can play one every turn or you play all of the best removal so you can answer a creature every turn. Then the unlikely path of defensive creatures and mill. Though with how bad the creatures are the burn deck might be the best.
So back to the principle of the format. It seems that the main point is that nothing ever cost more than 2 with the majority of things costing 1. However forcing everyone to run one of each basic land sends the wrong message. Decks want to be mono color or at the absolute most 2 color but by forcing everyone to run all 5 lands it will confuses them.
If the goal was 5 color decks then you've gone about this the wrong way. Your rules massively favor mono color decks because they get their color and simply treat the 4 other lands in their deck as blank cards. For a weird 5 color format you might want to copy the mini-masters format where you run 3 of each basic along with every card from a single pack.
Edit: I assume this is played with normal rules on everything not mentioned. 20 starting life, seven card hand draw one card a turn.
Alas,no matter how Doug tries,he is not,and will never be a good storywriter.
It just seems that everything he writes ends up a little off. Too fast pacing. Too cheesy joke. Too descriptive moment,too bad dialogue. A word redundant here,missing there. And when you have the awesome work of Chris L'Etoile with the same characters to compare,this reads like a second-rate fanfic.
It would also help not trying to cram as many things as possible into one story...and if you really have to,then let someone else than Doug write it. This read a lot of like Battle of Thraben - resulting in not enough time for everything and important things happening too fast (death of Brisela,for example).
So Dovin just...planeswalked away. And Hungry Flames were just...toothless.
One thing left me wondering. We are practically at the end of story. Battle is next,and then epilogue (Dark Intimations). Aether Revolt hits shelves this Friday. WHAT are we supposed to read whole February and March?!
Hopefully? The Gatewatch characters going about their daily routines - I mean, what do these people do when they're not kicking Eldritch Abominations in the junk or getting swept up in societal powerstruggles?
I'd just like to see Jace do some Guildpact work, since that's kind of his job, and let the other five members just... hang out. Show us what they do when they're off the clock.
We got quite a good look at their daily routine in Homesick. It was more or less exactly what you would expect them to do in their down time, but I don't expect many of these types of stories simply because magic isn't telling a sitcom though the occasion break to the lighter mood is welcome.
It would probably be easier if you countered the ability rather than the "instead of resolving" line.
Remember (Whenever you activate a Cycling ability, you may counter that ability. If you do return this card from your graveyard to your hand.)
You counter the ability first to avoid getting all of your Remember cards back with a single cycle. If you still want the milling effect from dredge then it will look like this.
Remember 3 (Whenever you activate a Cycling ability you may put exactly three cards from the top of your library into your graveyard and counter that ability. If you do, return this card from your graveyard to your hand.)
You need the milling up with the counter to keep the functionality of being unable to dredge if you have no cards in library.
I think Arson should be an instant so you can make a tempo play. Sorcery speed makes it meh in my opinion.
I've always wanted a better red Walker, but Chandra, Torch of Defiance is close. I like the idea of a scalable Walker in red, think about this:
XRR
Enters the battlefield with X loyalty.
+1: Put a 3/1 Elemental token with Trample and Haste onto the battlefield. Sacrifice that token at the end of the next turn.
-2: Each player discards their hand hand draws four cards.
-X: Each player sacrifices X lands and ~ deals X damage to each creature and player.
Overall, it seems to do everything red is known for. Three mana for a Shock Elemental, four for a mini Wheel of Fortune, at five it is literally Wildfire.
The problem is that each of your example cards is over the curve and your putting all of them on one card with scaling. The idea is nice but finding a balance between bad, good, and broken is difficult.
This mechanic seems crazy powerful with each other these spells sitting in exile giving you quite a bit of advantage as you cast more of them. A great balancing effect could be instead of an increase cost if they choose not to cast it it goes to the graveyard, though that makes it more of a soft epic.
Dwarven Ballista shouldn't be restricted to attacking and blocking creatures, thats whites thing. Also should probably deal 2 damage to you to balance.
Sage Advice, Presence of the Wise isn't exactly a powerhouse, a strictly better version should be fine try 2(G/W)
Goblin Lobbers is an incredibly powerful ability. Even as a 1/3 I'm hesitant to say it isn't too strong
Tree Serpent, I really like this card, but why Guile?
So other than KLD there don't appear to be any decline in deaths. Especially if you don't count the characters that death wasn't an end point.
So based on what people said almost no running story regularly kills anyone of any significance, but they regularly kill irrelevant redshirts that they occasionally shine a spotlight on just before they die to trick you into thinking they aren't a redshirt.
I don't want to sound rude or condescending I'm honestly curious because enough people here have voiced such an opinion that it leads me to believe that (semi-main or important side)characters do in fact die fairly often in other stories that I simply don't read. I'm open to the possibility that I don't expose myself to the proper sources but currently it just sounds ridiculous that no one goes about killing important characters with any regularity(besides that one) and a significant number of people expect it here.
If you just mean significant consequences like death then I can understand where you're coming from a bit better, but considering we're still on only the third story it still seems rather premature.
If you only ever care who has the highest then the best rework I have is you scrap the dominion count and change it to a status like monarch that cares about colored permanents. That way cards will care if their color has dominion and it is backwards compatible.
If you use it in a wider range then I have no good fixes.
I forgot to mention plot, it is annoyingly complex. If you just want to add temporary draw to your set then it may be best to just copy Commune with Lava template and leave it at that.
Edit: I did not see the face down part of Plot. The actual rules for plot would need a mention of the fact that you can look at the face down cards otherwise you wouldn't be able to cast them. This is weird. I understand that you want it to be secret but it makes it incredibly awkward with the limited cast window. You can keep them face down but I really feel the need to push you towards letting you cast them immediately and until the end of your next turn. This will make the ability stronger but not significantly and add a very strong bluff feature to them which is quite exciting.
I like everything about Brithright but the name. The name doesn't have the I care about others of my type feel to it, which is what the ability is. I don't currently have a suggestion to change it just pointing out the disconnect between flavor and function.
Contract looks good but I think it would open more design space if it triggered on any combat damage, not just to players. This makes it so your cards are more like Cinder Wall one shot combat effects but stapled onto a body with static abilities makes it more interesting.
I don't get Dominion's function on a card like Blade of the Hand. If I understood correctly which ever color has the most permanents on the battlefield has Dominion or Dominion is just the number of a color's permanents on the battlefield. So does Hand add two to the count of Dominion? If not then what? If so, is it worth it?
That is interesting but with this deck I can't imagine a hand that doesn't kill in two turns even with resistance.
The land problem is probably the biggest for this format. As is, mono color aggressive decks are king. Through most of, if not the entire game players will only be casting one spell a turn. Being locked into a single color, options are limited you either play all of the biggest creatures so you can play one every turn or you play all of the best removal so you can answer a creature every turn. Then the unlikely path of defensive creatures and mill. Though with how bad the creatures are the burn deck might be the best.
So back to the principle of the format. It seems that the main point is that nothing ever cost more than 2 with the majority of things costing 1. However forcing everyone to run one of each basic land sends the wrong message. Decks want to be mono color or at the absolute most 2 color but by forcing everyone to run all 5 lands it will confuses them.
If the goal was 5 color decks then you've gone about this the wrong way. Your rules massively favor mono color decks because they get their color and simply treat the 4 other lands in their deck as blank cards. For a weird 5 color format you might want to copy the mini-masters format where you run 3 of each basic along with every card from a single pack.
Edit: I assume this is played with normal rules on everything not mentioned. 20 starting life, seven card hand draw one card a turn.
You counter the ability first to avoid getting all of your Remember cards back with a single cycle. If you still want the milling effect from dredge then it will look like this.You need the milling up with the counter to keep the functionality of being unable to dredge if you have no cards in library.