Another one for the "why hasn't this been printed yet" category.
Stir the Cemetery5BB
Sorcery (R)
Return all creature cards from your graveyard to the battlefield. "I think I've demonstrated, brother, that quantity is sometimes preferable to quality." -- Gisa
Wild Gathering3RG
Enchantment (R)
You may cast creature cards as though they had flash.
At the beginning of each end step, Wild Gathering deals X to target creature or player, where X is the number of creatures that entered the battlefield under your control this turn.
Cavalier's Mount2W
Creature -- Horse (U)
Knight creatures you control get +1/+1. 1: Another target creature gains first strike and becomes a Knight until end of turn.
2/3
Spellstinger Hornet2R
Creature -- Insect (R)
Flying
Whenever you cast a spell that targets a player, Spellstinger Hornet deals 1 damage to target creature or player.
3/1
Baloth Whelp1GG
Creature -- Beast (U)
Trample
When Baloth Whelp is countered by a spell or ability an opponent controls, you may draw a card. Life can be slowed, but it can't be stopped.
3/3
Tepsukh, Death's Sting1BRG
Legendary Creature -- Scorpion (M)
Deathtouch
Other Scorpion, Spider and Insect creatures you control have deathtouch.
Whenever a creature an opponent controls dies, if it was dealt damage by a Scorpion, Spider or Insect this turn, draw a card and that player loses 1 life. G: Target Scorpion, Spider or Insect gains vigilance and indestructible until end of turn. "Her venom burns hotter than the sun itself." -- Nefsi, elder of Naktamun
3/4
Clinging Cadaver1B
Creature -- Zombie (U)
Clinging Cadaver can't block.
Whenever Clinging Cadaver is put into your hand from your graveyard, you may return target creature card not named Clinging Cadaver from your graveyard to your hand. 2B: Return Clinging Cadaver from your graveyard to your hand.
1/1
Immortal Vassal1BB
Creature -- Vampire Knight (R)
Deathtouch, indestructible
Whenever Immortal Vassal is dealt damage, you lose that much life.
At the beginning of your upkeep, if your life total is 5 or less, put a -1/-1 counter on Immortal Vassal. "I suffer, and have no choice but to endure."
5/5
Monstrous RuseW
Instant (C)
Any number of target creatures lose all creature types and become Humans until end of turn.
Draw a card. Nothing to see here.
Votes: netn10, Antiantiserum (I think it'd be even cooler in mono-white)
Relicbane HydraxG
Creature -- Hydra (R)
Relicbane Hydra enters the battlefield with X +1/+1 counters on it. 2, Remove a +1/+1 counter from Relicbane Hydra: Destroy target artifact or enchantment.
0/0
Black Lagoon
Land -- Swamp (U) (t: Add B to your mana pool.)
Black Lagoon enters the battlefield tapped. t: Add 1 mana of any color to your mana pool. Spend this mana only to cast Horror spells.
Its terrors are as innumerable as they are unknowable.
Soilturner Wurm5BG
Creature -- Zombie Wurm (R)
Trample
Whenever Soilturner Wurm deals combat damage to a player, you may put a creature card from your hand or graveyard onto the battlefield.
Madness Seeker1BR
Creature -- Human Wizard (R)
At the beginning of your upkeep, if you have three or more cards in hand, you may discard your hand. If you do, return target instant or sorcery card from your graveyard to your hand. (The card you return can't be one of the ones you discarded.)
At the beginning of your end step, exile an instant or sorcery card from your graveyard.
2/3
Remuneration1R
Sorcery (U)
Destroy up to two target artifacts you don't control. For each artifact destroyed this way, its controller creates a Treasure artifact token with "t, Sacrifice this: Add one mana of any color to your mana pool."
To a pirate, there's no wrong gold can't put right.
Votes: Rudyard (absolutely love this one!), netn10
Stir the Cemetery 5BB
Sorcery (R)
Return all creature cards from your graveyard to the battlefield.
"I think I've demonstrated, brother, that quantity is sometimes preferable to quality." -- Gisa
Votes: void_nothing, Indighost
Enchantment (R)
You may cast creature cards as though they had flash.
At the beginning of each end step, Wild Gathering deals X to target creature or player, where X is the number of creatures that entered the battlefield under your control this turn.
Votes: netn10, Subject16
Creature -- Horse (U)
Knight creatures you control get +1/+1.
1: Another target creature gains first strike and becomes a Knight until end of turn.
2/3
Votes: Link, netn10
Creature -- Insect (R)
Flying
Whenever you cast a spell that targets a player, Spellstinger Hornet deals 1 damage to target creature or player.
3/1
Votes: netn10, antiantiserum
Creature -- Beast (U)
Trample
When Baloth Whelp is countered by a spell or ability an opponent controls, you may draw a card.
Life can be slowed, but it can't be stopped.
3/3
Votes: Link, netn10
Legendary Creature -- Scorpion (M)
Deathtouch
Other Scorpion, Spider and Insect creatures you control have deathtouch.
Whenever a creature an opponent controls dies, if it was dealt damage by a Scorpion, Spider or Insect this turn, draw a card and that player loses 1 life.
G: Target Scorpion, Spider or Insect gains vigilance and indestructible until end of turn.
"Her venom burns hotter than the sun itself." -- Nefsi, elder of Naktamun
3/4
Votes: Antiantiserum, Ruggley
Creature -- Zombie (U)
Clinging Cadaver can't block.
Whenever Clinging Cadaver is put into your hand from your graveyard, you may return target creature card not named Clinging Cadaver from your graveyard to your hand.
2B: Return Clinging Cadaver from your graveyard to your hand.
1/1
Votes: Antiantiserum, Indighost
Creature -- Vampire Knight (R)
Deathtouch, indestructible
Whenever Immortal Vassal is dealt damage, you lose that much life.
At the beginning of your upkeep, if your life total is 5 or less, put a -1/-1 counter on Immortal Vassal.
"I suffer, and have no choice but to endure."
5/5
Votes: Moonleaf, Indighost (HM: void_nothing)
Instant (C)
Any number of target creatures lose all creature types and become Humans until end of turn.
Draw a card.
Nothing to see here.
Votes: netn10, Antiantiserum (I think it'd be even cooler in mono-white)
Creature -- Hydra (R)
Relicbane Hydra enters the battlefield with X +1/+1 counters on it.
2, Remove a +1/+1 counter from Relicbane Hydra: Destroy target artifact or enchantment.
0/0
Votes: Ruggley, netn10
Land -- Swamp (U)
(t: Add B to your mana pool.)
Black Lagoon enters the battlefield tapped.
t: Add 1 mana of any color to your mana pool. Spend this mana only to cast Horror spells.
Its terrors are as innumerable as they are unknowable.
Votes: PhyrexianBolas, Flatline
Instant (U)
Choose one --
Votes: Moonleaf, Rudyard
Creature -- Zombie Wurm (R)
Trample
Whenever Soilturner Wurm deals combat damage to a player, you may put a creature card from your hand or graveyard onto the battlefield.
6/6
Votes: Flatline, Rudyard
Creature -- Human Wizard (R)
At the beginning of your upkeep, if you have three or more cards in hand, you may discard your hand. If you do, return target instant or sorcery card from your graveyard to your hand. (The card you return can't be one of the ones you discarded.)
At the beginning of your end step, exile an instant or sorcery card from your graveyard.
2/3
Votes: Indighost, netn10
Sorcery (U)
Destroy up to two target artifacts you don't control. For each artifact destroyed this way, its controller creates a Treasure artifact token with "t, Sacrifice this: Add one mana of any color to your mana pool."
To a pirate, there's no wrong gold can't put right.
Votes: Rudyard (absolutely love this one!), netn10