I been building a Feather Commander deck and its been neat that it encourages cards you wouldn't normally play, especially in it's colors. In that same vein, here are some ideas:
Farogar of Faarwood2RGW
Legendary Creature - Beast Spirit (M)
Each Nontoken creature you control with no abilities enters the battlefield with 3 additional +1/+1 counters.
Creatures you control with a +1/+1 counter have haste, trample, and vigilance.
4/4
Vareer, Machination of Eons1UBR
Legendary Creature - Zombie Wizard (M)
Whenever you cast an instant or sorcery spell, scry 2. 2, T: Discard a Trap card. Create a copy of the discarded card. You may cast the copy without paying its mana cost.
2/4
Yegoloth, the Sea Spanner6UG
Legendary Creature - Octopus (M)
~ can't be countered.
Spells you control with a converted mana cost 8 can't be countered.
Whenever you cast a spell with a converted mana cost 8, you may untap up to 4 nonland permanents you control.
8/8
...And slightly off theme:
Bobyl, Infamous Gambler2UR
Legendary Creature - Human Advisor (M)
At the beginning of each upkeep, roll two dice. If the total is exactly 7, you draw three cards. Otherwise, discard a card. "Sounds risky. Just my style."
3/3
Tharin Dragon3RR
Creature - Dragon (R)
As an additional cost to cast Tharin Dragon, sacrifice two lands.
Flying
Tharin Dragon enters the battlefield with a +1/+1 counter on it for each land card in your graveyard.
3/3
Breed Infiltrator3U
Creature - Shapershifter (U)
Changeling
Creatures you control can't be blocked as long as they all share a creature type.
2/3
VollupoxXXBB
Sorcery (U)
Each player discards X cards and sacrifices X creatures and planeswalkers they control. Then each player loses 1 life for each card they discarded or sacrificed this way.
Living Peaks1GW
Legendary Snow Enchantment (R)
Snow lands you control are 2/2 creatures in addition to their other types.
Whenever a snow creature you control attacks, you may tap target permanent.
Arterak, the Compleator3GB
Legendary Artifact Creature - Human Wizard (M)
Infect
Whenever you would put one or more -1/-1 counters on a creature, you may choose one:
- Put that many +1/+1 counters on that creature instead.
- Destroy that creature.
3/4
The psuedo-unblockable ability that Thorn Elemental has is pretty strictly green, so making it in green/red is a pretty large bend. uncommon is viable for that ability, but this could ALMOST be a common for power.
I'm not going to nitpick some of your other points, but while the Thorn Elemental ability is green, my card also has fire breathing, so of course it's going to be both green and red. That's the classic example of how multicolor cards work. I really don't understand your argument.
Also, I've noticed a general trend lately with judges scoring Uniqueness. There have been a lot of french vanilla cards getting full points or 2.5s simply on the fact that the combination of keywords "hasn't been done before". A big part of what uniqueness is supposed to be about is creativity and exploring design space. It doesn't make sense to give cards like that full points and the rubric was written to penalize french vanilla cards in this specific section. So let's work on that. I know several judges these days were not involved in writing or the edits to rubric, but the points you're supposed to consider are all there.
Varfex, Rushflow Initiator2RR
Legendary Creature - Elemental (M)
Partners with Paleska, Flow Surveyor
Haste
Instant and sorcery spells you control cost 2 less to cast while ~ is attacking.
5/4
Paleska, Flow Surveyor2UU
Legendary Creature - Faerie Wizard (M)
Partners with Varfex, Rushflow Initiator
Flying, Prowess
When Paleska enters the battlefield, return target instant or sorcery card from your graveyard to your hand.
When you cast your second instant or sorcery spell on a turn, if you both own and control Paleska, Flow Surveyor and a creature named Varfex, Rushflow Initiator, exile them, then meld them into Parfex the Skyflow.
2/2
Parfex the Skyflow
(••) Legendary Creature - Avatar (M)
Flying, haste, prowess
Whenever an instant or sorcery would be put into your graveyard from anywhere, exile it.
When ~ attacks you may cast a copy of any number of instant and sorcery cards exiled with it without paying their mana cost.
6/7
You already break the general rule by making the keyword abilities of the Eidolon different then what it is enchanting. I feel if you're already ok breaking it, there are more intuitive ways to do it closer to my suggestion.
I like the concept, but I feel this does too many things and over-complicates. Nixing some of the extra abilities and getting rid of the "become a spirit" clause (it's already a spirit) would help. Something like:
Kluxion, Eidolon of VengeanceWBR
Legendary Enchantment Creature - Spirit (M)
Bestow 2WBR
Enchanted creature gets -4/-4 and attacks each turn if able.
Kluxion, Eidolon of Vengeance attacks each turn if able. WBR: Kluxion becomes an aura enchantment with enchant creature attached to target creature. It becomes a creature again if it's not attached to a creature.
4/4
Harox, City of Corpses
Legendary Land (M) T: Add C. B, T, Sacrifice Harox, City of Corpses: Add CC.
When Harox, City of Corpses enters the battlefield, if you unearthed it, it becomes a 10/10 black Zombie Giant in addition to it's other types.
Unearth 6BBB
Pyre-Hoof Kronch2RG
Creature — Beast (U) R: Pyre-Hoof Kronch gets +1/+0 until end of turn.
Whenever Pyre-Hoof Kronch becomes blocked, you may have it assign its combat damage to another creature or planeswalker of your choice this turn. Kronch Stomp
—Wrangler phrase meaning
"Changing your mind at the last instant"
1/4
Arenvol, Contract Binder2WB
Legendary Creature - Human Advisor (M)
At the beginning of each opponents upkeep, they choose friend or foe.
* Friend - That opponent gains 3 life and draws a card. Prevent all damage sources they control would deal to you and permanents you control until your next turn.
* Foe - That opponent loses 3 life and discards a card at random.
3/4
Trelzaya, Planar Conscious2WUG
Legendary Creature - Avatar (M)
Vigilance
At the beginning of your upkeep, each opponent chooses strength, knowledge, or health.
* Strength - You and that opponent create a 3/3 green Beast Token.
* Knowledge - You and that opponent draw a card.
* Health - You and that opponent gain 4 life.
4/5
Krenton, Mastermind for Hire1WUB
Legendary Creature - Veldalken Artificer (M)
At the beginning of your upkeep, each player may bid life. You start the bidding with a bid of any number. In turn order, each player may top the high bid. The bidding ends if the high bid stands. The high bidder loses life equal to the high bid. If you have the high bid, create a X/X colorless Doomsday artifact creature token with indestructible and trample, where X is the life lost this way.
4/4
Vraska, Empress of Rot2BG
Legendary Planeswalker - Vraska (M)
Vraska, Empress of Rot can be your commander.
+2: Create a 1/1 black Assassin creature token with deathtouch.
-XX: Exile target nonland permanent with a converted mana cost X or less. If X is 3 or greater, you draw a card.
-10: Target opponents life total becomes 1.
5
Kaya, Master of Demise3WB
Legendary Planeswalker - Kaya (M)
Kaya, Master of Demise can be your commander.
0: Exile Kaya and up to one target creature. Return those cards to the battlefield under their owner's control at the beginning of your next upkeep.
-2: Opponents and permanents they control lose shroud and hexproof and can't gain shroud or hexproof until your next turn. Each opponent discards a card.
-4: Exile target graveyard. It's owner loses 1 life for each card exiled this way.
5
Domri, Agent of Rampage3GR
Legendary Planeswalker - Domri (M)
Domri, Agent of Rampage can be your commander.
+2: Creature spells you cast cost 2 less until end of turn.
-2: Target creature gets +1/+0 and gains haste and double strike until end of turn.
-8: Search your library for a creature card and put it onto the battlefield. It deals damage equal to its power to each creature your opponents control. Shuffle your library.
4
Ral, Lord of Lightning3UR
Legendary Planeswalker - Ral (M)
Ral, Lord of Lightning can be your commander.
+1: Ral, Lord of Lightning, deals 2 damage to any target. Untap target permanent.
-2: Scry 2, then draw two cards.
-8: Until end of turn, whenever you cast an instant or sorcery spell, copy it for each other instant and sorcery spell you've cast before it this turn. You may choose new targets for the copies.
5
Dovin, Sculpter of Ordinance2WU
Legendary Planeswalker - Dovin (M)
Dovin, Sculpter of Ordinance can be your commander.
+1: Until your next turn at the beginning of each opponents end step, if you lost no life that turn, put a loyalty counter on Dovin.
-1: Target permanent's activated abilities can't be activated until your next turn. If it's a creature, it has 0 power until your next turn.
-XX: You gain X life and draw X cards.
4
Instant and sorcery one is insane - once you ritual into turnabout you get to copy it infinite times (literally any ritual being your 3rd spell is infinite mana), if it's boomerang you bounce the field, if it draws cards in any capacity it draws you deck, if it is lightning bolt you win, etc. It needs a limit of once per turn or mana cost or something.
You're right, I missed this when changing it from a triggered ability to an activated one. Fixed.
Razorgort cannot trigger on discarding a card that the opponent can't discard - if the trigger event occurs then clearly the intervening if-clause fails. This is a pretty unique effect. "Whenever a spell or ability would cause a player to dicard a card, if they can't," etc. Maybe?
You're probably right. I was basing the wording off of Urgoros, the Empty One but there probably needs to be a clause the refers to spells and abilities. Edited.
I think reylt not being green is fine, as it doesn't "add" counters per-say it moves them. Removing all counters at once feels black, especially with the -1/-1 counters it starts with. Also white for doublestrike.
I'm going to reimagine Telvera.
The Timing Gap in Noquarian is odd and is a feels bad for a mroe casual commander. Maybe if I switch it to be it static in play ability and make it "tap or destroy tapped" ability Eminence? And yes the flavor wizards usually goes with doesn't include whales, but could be a fun adjustment.
Farogar of Faarwood 2RGW
Legendary Creature - Beast Spirit (M)
Each Nontoken creature you control with no abilities enters the battlefield with 3 additional +1/+1 counters.
Creatures you control with a +1/+1 counter have haste, trample, and vigilance.
4/4
Vareer, Machination of Eons 1UBR
Legendary Creature - Zombie Wizard (M)
Whenever you cast an instant or sorcery spell, scry 2.
2, T: Discard a Trap card. Create a copy of the discarded card. You may cast the copy without paying its mana cost.
2/4
Yegoloth, the Sea Spanner 6UG
Legendary Creature - Octopus (M)
~ can't be countered.
Spells you control with a converted mana cost 8 can't be countered.
Whenever you cast a spell with a converted mana cost 8, you may untap up to 4 nonland permanents you control.
8/8
...And slightly off theme:
Bobyl, Infamous Gambler 2UR
Legendary Creature - Human Advisor (M)
At the beginning of each upkeep, roll two dice. If the total is exactly 7, you draw three cards. Otherwise, discard a card.
"Sounds risky. Just my style."
3/3
Tharin Dragon 3RR
Creature - Dragon (R)
As an additional cost to cast Tharin Dragon, sacrifice two lands.
Flying
Tharin Dragon enters the battlefield with a +1/+1 counter on it for each land card in your graveyard.
3/3
Breed Infiltrator 3U
Creature - Shapershifter (U)
Changeling
Creatures you control can't be blocked as long as they all share a creature type.
2/3
Vollupox XXBB
Sorcery (U)
Each player discards X cards and sacrifices X creatures and planeswalkers they control. Then each player loses 1 life for each card they discarded or sacrificed this way.
Living Peaks 1GW
Legendary Snow Enchantment (R)
Snow lands you control are 2/2 creatures in addition to their other types.
Whenever a snow creature you control attacks, you may tap target permanent.
Arterak, the Compleator 3GB
Legendary Artifact Creature - Human Wizard (M)
Infect
Whenever you would put one or more -1/-1 counters on a creature, you may choose one:
- Put that many +1/+1 counters on that creature instead.
- Destroy that creature.
3/4
I'm not going to nitpick some of your other points, but while the Thorn Elemental ability is green, my card also has fire breathing, so of course it's going to be both green and red. That's the classic example of how multicolor cards work. I really don't understand your argument.
Also, I've noticed a general trend lately with judges scoring Uniqueness. There have been a lot of french vanilla cards getting full points or 2.5s simply on the fact that the combination of keywords "hasn't been done before". A big part of what uniqueness is supposed to be about is creativity and exploring design space. It doesn't make sense to give cards like that full points and the rubric was written to penalize french vanilla cards in this specific section. So let's work on that. I know several judges these days were not involved in writing or the edits to rubric, but the points you're supposed to consider are all there.
Legendary Creature - Elemental (M)
Partners with Paleska, Flow Surveyor
Haste
Instant and sorcery spells you control cost 2 less to cast while ~ is attacking.
5/4
Paleska, Flow Surveyor 2UU
Legendary Creature - Faerie Wizard (M)
Partners with Varfex, Rushflow Initiator
Flying, Prowess
When Paleska enters the battlefield, return target instant or sorcery card from your graveyard to your hand.
When you cast your second instant or sorcery spell on a turn, if you both own and control Paleska, Flow Surveyor and a creature named Varfex, Rushflow Initiator, exile them, then meld them into Parfex the Skyflow.
2/2
Parfex the Skyflow
(••) Legendary Creature - Avatar (M)
Flying, haste, prowess
Whenever an instant or sorcery would be put into your graveyard from anywhere, exile it.
When ~ attacks you may cast a copy of any number of instant and sorcery cards exiled with it without paying their mana cost.
6/7
Kluxion, Eidolon of Vengeance WBR
Legendary Enchantment Creature - Spirit (M)
Bestow 2WBR
Enchanted creature gets -4/-4 and attacks each turn if able.
Kluxion, Eidolon of Vengeance attacks each turn if able.
WBR: Kluxion becomes an aura enchantment with enchant creature attached to target creature. It becomes a creature again if it's not attached to a creature.
4/4
Legendary Land (M)
T: Add C.
B, T, Sacrifice Harox, City of Corpses: Add CC.
When Harox, City of Corpses enters the battlefield, if you unearthed it, it becomes a 10/10 black Zombie Giant in addition to it's other types.
Unearth 6BBB
Creature — Beast (U)
R: Pyre-Hoof Kronch gets +1/+0 until end of turn.
Whenever Pyre-Hoof Kronch becomes blocked, you may have it assign its combat damage to another creature or planeswalker of your choice this turn.
Kronch Stomp
—Wrangler phrase meaning
"Changing your mind at the last instant"
1/4
Legendary Creature - Human Advisor (M)
At the beginning of each opponents upkeep, they choose friend or foe.
* Friend - That opponent gains 3 life and draws a card. Prevent all damage sources they control would deal to you and permanents you control until your next turn.
* Foe - That opponent loses 3 life and discards a card at random.
3/4
Trelzaya, Planar Conscious 2WUG
Legendary Creature - Avatar (M)
Vigilance
At the beginning of your upkeep, each opponent chooses strength, knowledge, or health.
* Strength - You and that opponent create a 3/3 green Beast Token.
* Knowledge - You and that opponent draw a card.
* Health - You and that opponent gain 4 life.
4/5
Krenton, Mastermind for Hire 1WUB
Legendary Creature - Veldalken Artificer (M)
At the beginning of your upkeep, each player may bid life. You start the bidding with a bid of any number. In turn order, each player may top the high bid. The bidding ends if the high bid stands. The high bidder loses life equal to the high bid. If you have the high bid, create a X/X colorless Doomsday artifact creature token with indestructible and trample, where X is the life lost this way.
4/4
Vraska's (-) ability now targets nonland permanents to make her more green. All loyalty number adjusted accordingly.
Kaya had her plurals already fixed.
Domri already had the type corrected to be two less.
Ral now deals 2 damage but untaps a permanent as well.
Dovin reversed.
Legendary Planeswalker - Vraska (M)
Vraska, Empress of Rot can be your commander.
+2: Create a 1/1 black Assassin creature token with deathtouch.
-XX: Exile target nonland permanent with a converted mana cost X or less. If X is 3 or greater, you draw a card.
-10: Target opponents life total becomes 1.
5
Kaya, Master of Demise 3WB
Legendary Planeswalker - Kaya (M)
Kaya, Master of Demise can be your commander.
0: Exile Kaya and up to one target creature. Return those cards to the battlefield under their owner's control at the beginning of your next upkeep.
-2: Opponents and permanents they control lose shroud and hexproof and can't gain shroud or hexproof until your next turn. Each opponent discards a card.
-4: Exile target graveyard. It's owner loses 1 life for each card exiled this way.
5
Domri, Agent of Rampage 3GR
Legendary Planeswalker - Domri (M)
Domri, Agent of Rampage can be your commander.
+2: Creature spells you cast cost 2 less until end of turn.
-2: Target creature gets +1/+0 and gains haste and double strike until end of turn.
-8: Search your library for a creature card and put it onto the battlefield. It deals damage equal to its power to each creature your opponents control. Shuffle your library.
4
Ral, Lord of Lightning 3UR
Legendary Planeswalker - Ral (M)
Ral, Lord of Lightning can be your commander.
+1: Ral, Lord of Lightning, deals 2 damage to any target. Untap target permanent.
-2: Scry 2, then draw two cards.
-8: Until end of turn, whenever you cast an instant or sorcery spell, copy it for each other instant and sorcery spell you've cast before it this turn. You may choose new targets for the copies.
5
Dovin, Sculpter of Ordinance 2WU
Legendary Planeswalker - Dovin (M)
Dovin, Sculpter of Ordinance can be your commander.
+1: Until your next turn at the beginning of each opponents end step, if you lost no life that turn, put a loyalty counter on Dovin.
-1: Target permanent's activated abilities can't be activated until your next turn. If it's a creature, it has 0 power until your next turn.
-XX: You gain X life and draw X cards.
4
I'm going to reimagine Telvera.
The Timing Gap in Noquarian is odd and is a feels bad for a mroe casual commander. Maybe if I switch it to be it static in play ability and make it "tap or destroy tapped" ability Eminence? And yes the flavor wizards usually goes with doesn't include whales, but could be a fun adjustment.