Nodding Bellsnake4GG
Creature - Wurm (U)
If Nodding Bellsnake attacks, untap all creatures defending player controls.
If Nodding Bellsnake is blocked by a Wurm, you and the controller of that wurm may put a 2/2 green Wurm creature token into play tapped. GGG: Regenerate Nodding Bellsnake. Wormriders have tried muffling the sound their worms make, but the worms made it clear as a bell they didn't like that one bit.
4/5
Dang, I keep forgetting to name the next card. Not this time!
Forest Fire3R
Enchantment - Aura (C)
Enchant Forest
Black Forests generate B instead of G.
Enchanted land has "T: add R to your mana pool".
At end of turn, enchanted land becomes black. Attach Forest Fire to another target Forest. "Not just a common occurrence in Emberlyn. The whole of Port Noe seems highly combustable of late." - Noeal ranger
Hope Springs Eternal3WW
Enchantment (R)
Hope Springs Eternal cannot be the target of spells or abilities.
If any creature's thoughness would drop to zero or less, it becomes 1 instead.
If any spell or ability would resolve that mentions a card type (plural or singular) in its rules text, remove it from game instead. (Flavor text doesn't count as rules text.) "This time no half-ass black spell's gonna ruin my perfect day!" Hellierant, archangel
Graverobber's PromiseB
Sorcery (U)
You may play this at any time any player could play a sorcery.
Take from any graveyard an artifact that was sacrificed this turn, and put it into play under your control.
Buyback - Sacrifice an artifact. "I promise you nothing, he said. And that's exactly what a graverobber's promise is worth." - Serek Jen, master archaeologist
Leeching Fluke2GB
Creature - wurm (U) G: Leeching Fluke loses all abilities and becomes an Aura with Enchant Creature and gains "0: Regenerate enchanted creature. It gets -1/-1 until end of turn." and "G: End the effect that created this ability." Attach Leeching Fluke to target creature. "I never felt this good and this disgusted at the same time." - fluked patient
2/3
Jagged Arrowworm2GU
Creature - Wurm (U)
Whenever Jagged Arrowworm blocks or becomes blocked by a creature, you may put a -1/-1 counter on that creature at end of combat.
Jagged Arrowworm cannot be blocked by creatures with -1/-1 counters on them. For every jagged tooth it leaves behind in its victims, a sharper one grows back.
3/3
Photographic Memory6UUU
Permanent (R)
You play with the top card of your library face-up. U: If the top card of your library is an instant or sorcery, you may put a copy of that spell on the stack. then put that card on the bottom of your library. U: If the top card of your library is a permanent, you may put a token into play that's a copy of that permanent. then put that card on the bottom of your library. "I'm an excellent driver." - Rainman
EDIT: made this card a tiny bit less preposterous. Now it actually costs you to play it
YHVH3WW
Legendary Creature - Avatar 0: Put into play a 1/1 white Adam legendary creature token. It has creature type Human. 0: At end of next turn, if YHVH is still in play, the game ends. I am the Alpha and the Omega
Wishmaster7BB
Legendary Creature - Djinn Avatar (R)
Sacrifice a djinn, Pay half your life (rounded up), T: Choose a card you own from outside the game, reveal that card, and put it into your hand. If you haven't played it by the end of this turn, you lose the game.
6/7
Fish Bowl1UUWW
Enchantment (R)
Players cannot be targeted by spells or abilities they do not control.
Creatures cannot be targeted by spells or abilities their controllers do not control. Don't tap the glass, son. They go scared like that.
S****eper ThrullUBB
Creature - Thrull (U)
Flying
Sacrifice S****eper Thrull: put a +3/+4 counter on target flying creature. Then, that creature loses flying.
3/4 It's beyond me how those things manage to stay airborne.
Cesspool Junction
Legendary Land - Swamp Forest (R) (T: Add B or G to your mana pool.)
At the beginning of your precombat main fase, remove a creature card in your graveyard from the game. If you can't, sacrifice Cesspool Junction.
Whenever Cesspool Junction is sacrificed add X mana in any combination of green and/or black to your mana pool, where X is the total converted mana cost of all creatures removed from the game with Cesspool Junction. According to Golgari myth, this is where the very first waste dump ever was made. The tangible stench that originates here, is the oldest and most potent of all stink in Ravnica.
Next1U
instant (R)
Counter target creature spell. If it's countered this way, both you and the controller of that spell may search their library for a creature card, reveal it, and put it in their hand.
Buyback - Discard a creature card. (You may choose and discard a creature card in addition to any other costs when you play this spell. If you do, put it into your hand instead of your graveyard as part of the spell's effect.)
Don't call us, we'll call you.
Stack Dump0
Permanent
You cannot play this from your hand.
Other spells and abilities on the stack cannot resolve.
If a player would win or lose the game, instead sacrifice Stack Dump. 00a9abe4 00e14440 009ff118 00000000 0000001f 00da8c80 00000000 ...
Nodding Bellsnake 4GG
Creature - Wurm (U)
If Nodding Bellsnake attacks, untap all creatures defending player controls.
If Nodding Bellsnake is blocked by a Wurm, you and the controller of that wurm may put a 2/2 green Wurm creature token into play tapped.
GGG: Regenerate Nodding Bellsnake.
Wormriders have tried muffling the sound their worms make, but the worms made it clear as a bell they didn't like that one bit.
4/5
Forest Fire 3R
Enchantment - Aura (C)
Enchant Forest
Black Forests generate B instead of G.
Enchanted land has "T: add R to your mana pool".
At end of turn, enchanted land becomes black. Attach Forest Fire to another target Forest.
"Not just a common occurrence in Emberlyn. The whole of Port Noe seems highly combustable of late." - Noeal ranger
Next: Noeal Ranger
Enchantment (R)
Hope Springs Eternal cannot be the target of spells or abilities.
If any creature's thoughness would drop to zero or less, it becomes 1 instead.
If any spell or ability would resolve that mentions a card type (plural or singular) in its rules text, remove it from game instead. (Flavor text doesn't count as rules text.)
"This time no half-ass black spell's gonna ruin my perfect day!" Hellierant, archangel
Sorcery (U)
You may play this at any time any player could play a sorcery.
Take from any graveyard an artifact that was sacrificed this turn, and put it into play under your control.
Buyback - Sacrifice an artifact.
"I promise you nothing, he said. And that's exactly what a graverobber's promise is worth." - Serek Jen, master archaeologist
Creature - wurm (U)
G: Leeching Fluke loses all abilities and becomes an Aura with Enchant Creature and gains "0: Regenerate enchanted creature. It gets -1/-1 until end of turn." and "G: End the effect that created this ability." Attach Leeching Fluke to target creature.
"I never felt this good and this disgusted at the same time." - fluked patient
2/3
Creature - Wurm (U)
Whenever Jagged Arrowworm blocks or becomes blocked by a creature, you may put a -1/-1 counter on that creature at end of combat.
Jagged Arrowworm cannot be blocked by creatures with -1/-1 counters on them.
For every jagged tooth it leaves behind in its victims, a sharper one grows back.
3/3
Permanent (R)
You play with the top card of your library face-up.
U: If the top card of your library is an instant or sorcery, you may put a copy of that spell on the stack. then put that card on the bottom of your library.
U: If the top card of your library is a permanent, you may put a token into play that's a copy of that permanent. then put that card on the bottom of your library.
"I'm an excellent driver." - Rainman
EDIT: made this card a tiny bit less preposterous. Now it actually costs you to play it
Legendary Creature - Avatar
0: Put into play a 1/1 white Adam legendary creature token. It has creature type Human.
0: At end of next turn, if YHVH is still in play, the game ends.
I am the Alpha and the Omega
Legendary Creature - Djinn Avatar (R)
Sacrifice a djinn, Pay half your life (rounded up), T: Choose a card you own from outside the game, reveal that card, and put it into your hand. If you haven't played it by the end of this turn, you lose the game.
6/7
Fish Bowl 1UUWW
Enchantment (R)
Players cannot be targeted by spells or abilities they do not control.
Creatures cannot be targeted by spells or abilities their controllers do not control.
Don't tap the glass, son. They go scared like that.
Creature - Thrull (U)
Flying
Sacrifice S****eper Thrull: put a +3/+4 counter on target flying creature. Then, that creature loses flying.
3/4
It's beyond me how those things manage to stay airborne.
Splat
Legendary Land - Swamp Forest (R)
(T: Add B or G to your mana pool.)
At the beginning of your precombat main fase, remove a creature card in your graveyard from the game. If you can't, sacrifice Cesspool Junction.
Whenever Cesspool Junction is sacrificed add X mana in any combination of green and/or black to your mana pool, where X is the total converted mana cost of all creatures removed from the game with Cesspool Junction.
According to Golgari myth, this is where the very first waste dump ever was made. The tangible stench that originates here, is the oldest and most potent of all stink in Ravnica.
instant (R)
Counter target creature spell. If it's countered this way, both you and the controller of that spell may search their library for a creature card, reveal it, and put it in their hand.
Buyback - Discard a creature card. (You may choose and discard a creature card in addition to any other costs when you play this spell. If you do, put it into your hand instead of your graveyard as part of the spell's effect.)
Don't call us, we'll call you.
Next: Crystal Gazing
Permanent
You cannot play this from your hand.
Other spells and abilities on the stack cannot resolve.
If a player would win or lose the game, instead sacrifice Stack Dump.
00a9abe4 00e14440 009ff118 00000000 0000001f 00da8c80 00000000 ...