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The End of an Era
  • posted a message on [Offtopic] Community Thread
    Quote from asteriskreaper
    Because it's morning here GMT-6


    As I mentioned, I fell asleep and it should be quite logical that I never set my alarm clock. When I woke up, it was about 2 PM here. Thankfully, today is Thursday and I had no lessons to attend, only self-studying.

    ... Though I'm starting to get more and more anxious due to my English presentation next week and I have managed to get nothing done for it, I don't even have a topic yet. ("Anything" our teacher said, but my mind is blank.)
    Posted in: Commander (EDH)
  • posted a message on [Offtopic] Community Thread
    Quote from asteriskreaper
    wait dont you live in europe or some place?


    Yeah, in Northern Europe, next to Russia, in a country called Finland. (GMT +2).
    How come?
    Posted in: Commander (EDH)
  • posted a message on [Offtopic] Community Thread
    The feeling when you wake up in the morning in front of your computer and community thread open...
    Posted in: Commander (EDH)
  • posted a message on [Offtopic] Community Thread
    I prefer poisons over knifes and fists, when it comes to dealing with annoying people.
    Posted in: Commander (EDH)
  • posted a message on [Offtopic] Community Thread
    Quote from asteriskreaper
    that's not what he is asking, he is asking how is it your fault at all?


    I really, really doubt anyone wants to/is even remotely interested in hearing me ranting about my life.

    But if there really is someone who really insists to hear about it, here is a post wrote to another site a week-or-so ago:
    I lie and deceive. And I am not talking about those little white lies, but I don't intend my lies to cause harm. To others. I lie to myself, I lie to others. I'm betraying myself.

    I act cheerful and happy all the time when I'm around other people, but behind the closed doors I just fall apart. I'm always doing everything I can to hide my true self from others, no matter what it may cost me. I've been maintaining this facade for years now. I haven't been honest to myself for years now, I always seek to please other people at the cost of myself, I'm always changing my own opinions to fit with the others' opinions. I'm never truthful to myself or others, I never do what I want to do, all I'm doing is pleasing others: my parents, my teachers, my classmates, my "friends".

    Now you may ask why "friends", not friends. To be honest that even though there are people who might think they are close to me, I rarely feel that I'm "connected" to them in anyways, I just feel like I'm no one to anyone else. I'm just filled with expectations, and nothing else. I don't have anyone I feel that I can talk to about things like this. I'm surrounded by people but still alone. You get what I'm talking about?

    Also, you might wonder how I ever ended up in a situation like this? Answer is simple: Bullying. I was bullied while I was still in upper comprehensive school, I was called with names, I faced violence towards me EVERY SINGLE DAY, and the worst of all, no one seemed to care. "Boys will be boys". Every PE lesson I was beaten up, locked up in a storeroom, and once I was almost drowned in a swimming pool and if I ever said anything to a teacher, either they didn't care, or "He's just making things up, we never did anything". I wasn't against a person or two. I was against a whole class. I had no one, I was alone. My parents were busy and were thinking about divorcing (they never did in the end, but it was close), I had no friends, teachers didn't care.

    So I tried to escape this all somehow, I gave my everything to my studies. I became the A student (I was good in school in elementary school, but still), and became the student with the best grades in the whole class. This only caused others to bully my more and more and harder. Things just got worse along with time. And it didn't end until I graduated and began my studies in an upper secondary school in another town (where I also currently live). Things never got much better after that. Sure, I haven't been bullied ever since, but still to this day, I pretty much have no one to whom I could talk about things like this. Even nowadays every morning is a challenge to me, whether or not I manage to wake up and get off my bed or not.

    But that's it. I'm going to go to bed now, it's almost 5AM here... One more night spent in MTGS-forums. *sigh*
    Posted in: Commander (EDH)
  • posted a message on [Offtopic] Community Thread
    Quote from Jivanmukta
    What do you mean 66% your fault?


    I guess it should've been 67%, where "6" presents a nice that is also 3! and "7" denotes that the percentage is made on the spot.
    Posted in: Commander (EDH)
  • posted a message on [Offtopic] Community Thread
    Quote from asteriskreaper
    do i have to state the obvious ?


    Lack of Social Skills + Social Awkwardness + Mental Health Problems + Lack of Self-respect = Nothing good. (And this applies to us both. She's opened up to me about all her problems with life, things like anorexia and deep depression).

    But yes, I know that it's 66% my fault caused by my other problems I have in my life. (I have really bad relationship with my parents, I'm having hard time struggling with my depression and suicidal thoughts.)
    Posted in: Commander (EDH)
  • posted a message on [Offtopic] Community Thread
    Quote from rhakee
    [QUOTE=Bursama;/comments/4799754]It was aimed at me only, she had told that she didn't want ANYONE to be in contact with her for a month. Though I just flat out ignore her request and visited her place, only to find out that she was on the verge of a breakdown due stress caused by her upcoming entrance exams... Even though she has place at any college she'd apply already (She's one of the best students and has placed on the top places in every nation-wide competition she has participated...). She running with pure coffee, she barely had slept...

    You should really just give her a hug. Like on of those cinematic romantic camera hugs! Just do it!


    When I said she hangs around with me at times, I meant this:

    (And then she flat out ignores me, forgets things I told her or just happens to be 1½ hours late from appointments...)
    Posted in: Commander (EDH)
  • posted a message on [Offtopic] Community Thread
    Quote from rhakee
    So what if she is weird and exiled you for a month from talking to her... which is odd... but so what, we appreciate people and look beyond their flaws, right?


    It was aimed at me only, she had told that she didn't want ANYONE to be in contact with her for a month. Though I just flat out ignore her request and visited her place, only to find out that she was on the verge of a breakdown due stress caused by her upcoming entrance exams... Even though she has place at any college she'd apply already (She's one of the best students and has placed on the top places in every nation-wide competition she has participated...). She running with pure coffee, she barely had slept...

    Quote from asteriskreaper
    wait... your putting up with this and NOT getting any? are you in to her?


    After living 19 with a mother that reads your e-mails and text messages and checks you phone call logs, and spies with whom I speak with and about what, I can put up with pretty much anything. She's made me want to rip my hair couple of times, but that's it.
    Posted in: Commander (EDH)
  • posted a message on [Offtopic] Community Thread
    Quote from rhakee
    To be blunt (I can't believe I'm saying this) you must have some sort of sexual relations with this girl in order for her behavior to be worth your time (according to the meaning of that specific English euphemisms)... Thats actually a interesting way of looking at it. Huh.


    Well, answer for that is no. The relationship (if it can be called as that) is based on intellectual relations. Haven't you ever met someone who is on the same level when it comes to your interests and intellectual level. She is the only one I can speak with about deeper things without having to explain every other term I say. (She's the only one so far with whom I've managed have 1½ hours long deep talk about the symbolism of the magical items in fantasy literature of 20th century.)

    It's just that I'm apparently only one who visit at her home on something that could be called regular basis (bimonthly) and makes sure she hasn't died somewhere behind the stacks of her school books and homework and stuff. (At time I get the feeling that I didn't go there and literally drag her out of her house, she wouldn't get to see the sunlight...)

    EDIT:
    Quote from asteriskreaper
    thanks
    ps. euphemism is singular, not plural


    Your credibility as grammar Nazi is near to naught; Sentences are supposed to be started with capital letters as well as "I" is supposed to be written always with capital letters...
    Posted in: Commander (EDH)
  • posted a message on [Offtopic] Community Thread
    Quote from asteriskreaper
    then you better be getting some, man.


    I fail to understand what you mean ("some" is quite vague expression), though I am not sure I even want to know.
    (I hate English euphemisms, I really don't get the most of the time.)
    Posted in: Commander (EDH)
  • posted a message on [Offtopic] Community Thread
    Quote from asteriskreaper
    your girlfriend?


    Short answer: Relationships are complicated.

    Long answer: Not...? Things are really quite complicated, she acts nice and mellow (and is literally attached to me, I mean she acts like super-glue) at times and then are the periods she flat out ignores my existence. (She told me last month she doesn't want to see me for about month because "she otherwise can't study for her exams 12 hours per day".)

    Also, she has made it quite sure that she hates the idea that I'd be her boyfriend and much to her chagrin her parents have started to call me "son-in-law". Oh, and apparently I'm the only one who can talk to her brother who has reached "the rebellious teenage" -phase without shouting, I'm the only one who he apparently treats with respect and doesn't curse at.)

    TL;DR: Things are quite complicated, and I have no idea what the hell is going on.
    Posted in: Commander (EDH)
  • posted a message on YMTC 22: Power and Toughness Poll
    Quote from ShinyMan »
    It'd be extremely lame for a card with this ability to be small and has higher T than P since nobody would play it.


    Talk for yourself. I and I'd assume quite many other control-players would play it.

    Besides, WotC really doesn't print much aggressive creatures with controllish abilities. Please, name one from the last few years: A creature with aggressive P/T and still very controllish abilities.
    Posted in: Custom Card Contests and Games
  • posted a message on [Offtopic] Community Thread
    Quote from rhakee
    THEY'RE LANGUAGE IS SO COOL!!!!! I'm gonna do it =D

    A little sample can be found here!


    "Their", not "they're". /grammar nazi

    This in why people think that native English speakers are the one who can speak English the worst. (Though I'm still afraid of the day when The Spirit of EDH someone will completely crush the last remains of my confidence that I can speak English and tell me "your English is horribly broken and sucks".)

    Also, anyone been in that nasty situation where you end being the intermediate between a girl and her mother in their fights? (Whenever you are present and they end up fighting, it all ends up in the situation where they both stare at you and demand you to tell which one of them is right...)
    Posted in: Commander (EDH)
  • posted a message on [Offtopic] Community Thread
    Quote from Kittens
    I know who I'm getting it done by. The only problem is finding her, though I guess I could get my brother to find her for me.


    Thankfully, I don't have that problem. I'm apparently only one capable of getting in contact with her, so that most of her friends turn to me when they can't find her. (Apparently, she rarely answer phone calls unless I or her mother calls to her. Also, I'm apparently one of the something like her 3 acquaintances who knows her address... Yeah, it's pretty weird.)
    Posted in: Commander (EDH)
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