i'm a gay man wanting straight men's perspectives about friendship. i've been heartbroken over a failed friendship at school; i can see that i've been repressing the hurt which i can't access. it's all unclear and a muddle to me.
sometimes i tell myself that i should "just get over it", or i would tell myself many other typical things people would say. but it hasn't been helping; i feel more like i'm scolding myself or shaming myself, rather than touching a place that "rings true" or rings with clarity when i tell myself these things.
sexual attraction, for me, has always been kind of fluid and mixed in with feelings of platonic attraction, to the point where it's hard for me to completely see these things as separate non-related concepts.
`
um..
what i want to know is
if straight guys can feel
attachment, attraction, admiration, or a sense of "he /knows/ me" or "we /relate/ to each other" or "we /matter/ to each other" or "i'm not alone in this world" or "i'm made stronger because he is /okay/ with me"..
` to another guy
` to the point where
` if the friendship fails over him rejecting you, and no communication happens and you're cut off..
` that it can devastate you?
can straight men feel another guy to be that important to them? (even to the point of heartbreak many months later, upon rejection?)
can (platonic) friendships have that strong and essential a quality to them?
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Goblins have poor impulse control. Don't click this link!!
some of my favourite flavour text:
Wayward Soul "no home no heart no hope"
—Stronghold graffito
Raging Goblin He raged at the world, at his family, at his life. But mostly he just raged.
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sometimes i tell myself that i should "just get over it", or i would tell myself many other typical things people would say. but it hasn't been helping; i feel more like i'm scolding myself or shaming myself, rather than touching a place that "rings true" or rings with clarity when i tell myself these things.
sexual attraction, for me, has always been kind of fluid and mixed in with feelings of platonic attraction, to the point where it's hard for me to completely see these things as separate non-related concepts.
`
um..
what i want to know is
if straight guys can feel
attachment, attraction, admiration, or a sense of "he /knows/ me" or "we /relate/ to each other" or "we /matter/ to each other" or "i'm not alone in this world" or "i'm made stronger because he is /okay/ with me"..
` to another guy
` to the point where
` if the friendship fails over him rejecting you, and no communication happens and you're cut off..
` that it can devastate you?
can straight men feel another guy to be that important to them? (even to the point of heartbreak many months later, upon rejection?)
can (platonic) friendships have that strong and essential a quality to them?
Goblins have poor impulse control. Don't click this link!!
some of my favourite flavour text:
Wayward Soul
"no home no heart no hope"
—Stronghold graffito
Raging Goblin
He raged at the world, at his family, at his life. But mostly he just raged.