Escape Hatch 0
Artifact
:symtap:, sacrifice Escape Hatch: Target white or green creature you control gains protection from black until end of turn.
:symtap:, sacrifice Escape Hatch: Return target red or blue creature you control to its owner's hand.
Neoling 1G
Creature--Elemental
4/4
When Neoling enters the battlefield, choose a non-legendary creature an opponent controls. That player puts a token copy of that creature onto the battlefield.
Combative Furlough 3R
Creature--Human Soldier
4/4
When Combative Furlough enters the battlefield, it battles target creature. (Each deals damage equal to its power to the other.) "Some vacation! We walk into a bar to relax...turns out there are jerks there too!"
Escalating Misfortune R
Enchantment--Aura
Enchant creature
At the beginning of your upkeep, put a charge counter on Escalating Misfortune, then it deals X damage to enchanted creature and X damage to enchanted creature's controller, where X is the number of charge counters on it.
Ingenious Apes 1G
Creature--Ape Shaman
2/2
Whenever an opponent casts an instant spell with converted mana cost less than Ingenious Apes's power, you may copy that spell and you may choose new targets for the copy. The apes don't so much study enemy magic as stare it into submission.
Brilliant Apes 1G
Creature--Ape Shaman
2/2
Whenever an opponent activates a non-mana ability, you may pay 1UR. If you do, gain control of that ability and you may change its targets. If you're the second species on your world to gain sentience, your mind evolves a talent for co-option.
Spellshort Rod 1U
Artifact 2U,T: Counter target activated ability from a permanent source unless its controller pays that permanent's mana cost. (Mana abilities can't be targeted.)
(This is also a small tricky hose for nonbasic lands with nonmana abilities...)
(no its not, since a lands CMC is 0, thus why artifact lands become 0/0 creatures when march of the machines comes out)
Yes, it is. A land's converted mana cost is 0, but its mana cost is undefined, and thus can't be paid. Old war story: when asked to make a "subtle token hoser" for a WotC contest, I used the same trick, only be told that was way, way too subtle.
Since that renders Smelting Furnace impotent, I'll hose both it and the card it was meant to hose.
Clever Apes 1G
Creature--Ape Shaman
2/2
Clever Apes has the activated abilities of all artifacts opponents control. You may spend as though it were any color of mana to activate these abilities. For them, imitation is the sincerest form of repudiation.
Fairness in Hell 1B
Enchantment
Whenever a creature enters the battlefield under an opponent's control, you may return a creature card with power less than or equal to that creature's power from your graveyard to the battlefield. Hellbent - As long as your hand is empty, you may cast instants and sorceries from your opponent's graveyard. If a card you cast this way would be put into a graveyard, exile it instead.
Giants' Plague 1B
Enchantment
Enchantments you control have wither.
Whenever a creature deals 5 or more combat damage, you may have Giants' Plague deal 2 damage to it.
Gruul Church-raiders RG
Creature--Goblin Elf Warrior
1/1
Bloodthirst 1
Red creatures you control have protection from white.
Green creatures you control have protection from black.
0
Artifact
:symtap:, sacrifice Escape Hatch: Target white or green creature you control gains protection from black until end of turn.
:symtap:, sacrifice Escape Hatch: Return target red or blue creature you control to its owner's hand.
Make a card called Long For This World.
1G
Creature--Elemental
4/4
When Neoling enters the battlefield, choose a non-legendary creature an opponent controls. That player puts a token copy of that creature onto the battlefield.
Make a card called Long For This World.
3R
Creature--Human Soldier
4/4
When Combative Furlough enters the battlefield, it battles target creature. (Each deals damage equal to its power to the other.)
"Some vacation! We walk into a bar to relax...turns out there are jerks there too!"
Make a card called Long For This World.
R
Enchantment--Aura
Enchant creature
At the beginning of your upkeep, put a charge counter on Escalating Misfortune, then it deals X damage to enchanted creature and X damage to enchanted creature's controller, where X is the number of charge counters on it.
Make a card called Long For This World.
1G
Creature--Ape Shaman
2/2
Whenever an opponent casts an instant spell with converted mana cost less than Ingenious Apes's power, you may copy that spell and you may choose new targets for the copy.
The apes don't so much study enemy magic as stare it into submission.
Make a card called Long For This World.
1G
Creature--Ape Shaman
2/2
Whenever an opponent activates a non-mana ability, you may pay 1UR. If you do, gain control of that ability and you may change its targets.
If you're the second species on your world to gain sentience, your mind evolves a talent for co-option.
Make a card called Long For This World.
Yes, it is. A land's converted mana cost is 0, but its mana cost is undefined, and thus can't be paid. Old war story: when asked to make a "subtle token hoser" for a WotC contest, I used the same trick, only be told that was way, way too subtle.
Since that renders Smelting Furnace impotent, I'll hose both it and the card it was meant to hose.
Clever Apes
1G
Creature--Ape Shaman
2/2
Clever Apes has the activated abilities of all artifacts opponents control. You may spend as though it were any color of mana to activate these abilities.
For them, imitation is the sincerest form of repudiation.
Make a card called Long For This World.
1U
Enchantment
Whenever a library is shuffled, you may pay UU. If you do, counter target spell or ability.
Make a card called Long For This World.
1B
Enchantment
Whenever a creature enters the battlefield under an opponent's control, you may return a creature card with power less than or equal to that creature's power from your graveyard to the battlefield.
Hellbent - As long as your hand is empty, you may cast instants and sorceries from your opponent's graveyard. If a card you cast this way would be put into a graveyard, exile it instead.
Make a card called Long For This World.
UG
Creature--Mutant Beast
3/3
Graft 3
Creatures with +1/+1 counters can't attack or block.
Make a card called Long For This World.
1B
Enchantment
Enchantments you control have wither.
Whenever a creature deals 5 or more combat damage, you may have Giants' Plague deal 2 damage to it.
Make a card called Long For This World.
RG
Creature--Goblin Elf Warrior
1/1
Bloodthirst 1
Red creatures you control have protection from white.
Green creatures you control have protection from black.
Make a card called Long For This World.
3B
Instant
Until end of turn, if target opponent would draw a card, he or she draws four cards instead.
Flashback--Sacrifice three creatures.
Make a card called Long For This World.
RR
Creature--Elemental
7/1
Haste, trample, Champion an Elemental
Sacrifice Sudden Fury at the beginning of your end step.
Make a card called Long For This World.
4
Artifact
:symtap:: Name a card, then reveal the top card of your library. If it's the named card, draw it.
Make a card called Long For This World.