There is no ordinary way to reach this shop, nor a way to return without stumbling upon it again by chance. Such is the way of things.
The mysterious inn turns out to be… quite brightly lit and, frankly, not very ominous at all. The walls have been painted white, the counters and numerous item-lined shelves are a pinkish marble, and the door marked “Billiards” to the far left is a deep blue. The stairs leading up to the rooms, same side as the pool, are also bluish in color. The door on the other side, marked “PAWN”, is a gaudy orange. The front of the counter is no color at all, the clear glass that showcasing the various foodstuffs, libations, and other consumables the owner will happily stuff down your gullet in exchange for gold.
An older man happily waits behind the counter for anything you might wish to ask about. He greets you, of course, a friendly “Hello! Here to buy something? Collect tax money? Tax collectors can go home, I already paid.”
All in-gold purchases limited to one per section per customer per visit.
Stuff you Eat! **Eating food, very popular. All the young people are doing it. Our food? The BEST food. Be the talk of your city, town, and/or small collection of huts!
Spiced Alogean Haggis – 10g – Delectable haggis, made with the finest mystery spices this side of Bakara! May have temporary side effects! Wears off eventually, no worries!
Slab of Giant Gorion Steak with Whistle-Tater Fries – 15g – Delicious! Nutritious! May have temporary side effects! Be normal by the end of your next quest, no worries!
Elexian Onion Stew – 15g – “Made with the finest stolen ingredients! Unless you’re a peackeeper. Then it was made with finest technically legal ingredients! Inspiring!”
Seasonal Fare <Spring> Marbled Fowl with Stuffed Artichokes and Side Salad – 50g – Imported from the basement each day! Does stuff! Wonderful stuff! Can substitute giant mushrooms for artichokes.
Paragon Salad – 300g – Words cannot describe it. Everything. Best everything. WILL CHANGE YOU FOREVER!
Stuff you Drink! Like eating, but without the fattening solid-ness! Don’t like how you look? I suggest blindfold and alcohol.
All purchases can be upgraded to extra tall for just 10g more! Tall drinks come with a complementary Four Seasons mug!
Tall Glass of water – Free! – Glass is not free. Don’t return glass? I release hounds.
Greevan Ale – Pocket Change – Fine elven beverage! Discount on the first cup!
Fancy Named Wines – 10g – “So many names! So fancy! Pick a name, drink it! May have minor side effects. Will wear off, no worries!”
Captain Jack’s Mystery Brew – 20g – “The captain loved this brew! He made it all the time. So much, in fact, that I still have barrels full of the stuff lying around... Try some today! Let my overstock be your fantastic deal!”
Seasonal Fare <Spring> My’Kurrian Fruit Juice – 30g – A smooth blend of fruits and exotic plant-parts from the notable tropical island! But not the regular stuff! The really exotic stuff.
Sekoran Grove-Wine – 100g – Smooth. Textured. Calls up the natural world, says “This guy? This guy’s my best friend. Best friend. Hiccup.”
Medical Supplements! Trust issues? No worries! I’m a professional salesman!
Serpent Oil - Pocket Change - Does everything and anything! Effects may very.
Seasonal <Spring> Mind Trip Ticket - 40g - A thin vanilla wafer made with the finest potioning regents! Leaves your body out cold and your mind spiraling through a crazed journey of self discovery! Doesn't grant magic powers! Unless you consider being well-adjusted and free of past mental fetters a magical power! Become a new you today!
Collectibles and Other Fancy Stuff You Shouldn’t Eat **Like collecting things? We have things! Things that go with things we don’t sell! Because we care.**
Mysterious Masks – 60g each – Featureless! Half-Masks! Masks of all shapes, sizes, sexual preferences, etc, etc. With or without eyeholes!
Mysterious Boxes – 100g each – Comes in four different varieties! Ask me for more information! Information like “One of the boxes is a creamy white with dashes of frosted blues and reds. Like a cake! Except you can’t eat it!”.
Seasonal <Spring>
Insect Repellant – Pocket Change – “Dislike insects? Use this oil! Do not eat!”
Floral Print Umbrellas – 30g – “Made of sugar? Like singing in rain, don’t like dancing with it? Buy one of these! Fine ironwood umbrella bearing a beautiful leather-strength covering. Highly resistant to water, electricity, and fire. Grip can extrude a sticky sap to keep it from being blown away. We think of everything!
Garden Filly – 200g – A plant horse! Flesh of living ironwood, mane of flowing vines, soft moss in place of fur, strong emerald hooves, eyes that look like pools of water that bear a single lily of exquisite beauty. Will grow up to be very strong, very fast, very loyal!
Pawning! Go through the door, play a game of Rock, Paper, Scissors with the big man. You win? 150% Pawn! You lose? 25% Pawn! You tie? Normal (75%) Pawn!
**The old tenses with giddy excitement at the mention of gold. The excitement spreads to his voice as well, the man's words rushing past as though they were late for their own wedding.**
John - "15 gold! You could buy a whole meal for that! Buy five meals, feed some kids! Unless they're teens, maybe feed teens two meals each. Teens eat a lot!"
**The shopekeep's arm reflexively points towards the orange door when Jakari mouths the word "sell", the rest of the shopkeep's body taking a moment longer to digest the information.**
John - "The man in the next room over buys many things! He's quite insistent on playing rock-paper-scissors to determine how good the deal is, perhaps you will show your skill!"
**Before him lies a large room, completely empty save for the man sitting upon the large beige mat resting upon the ground. Calling him a man might be inaccurate; the garr looks more like a hill with eyes than anything else.**
Ro - "Present each item in turn. I will tell you base pawning amount. You may accept or decline. If you accept, we will play a single game of rock paper scissors. If we tie, I will pay you the base amount. If you win, I will pay you double the base amount. If you lose, I will pay you one third the base amount."
**Another door is off to the side, it presumably leads to the storage room(s).**
Ro - "Deals offered do not need to be deals taken, but it is also true that deals rejected do not need to be replaced by deals offered. Decide as you will."
He stared with steely eyes into the garr's eyes as he made his move. He figured that a man who relied on tricks to make his money off of travelers was likely a cheat anyway. He made his demeanor as intimidating as possible. He threw rock. If the garr blinked in the face of his intimidation and threw paper then the jakari would change to scissors.
**Ro had initially appeared somewhat bored with the whole affair, but his mood had perked up a bit at the Jakari's intimidation attempt. Granted, that probably wasn't what Jakari was hoping for.
In anycase, the garr throws out a fist that stays a fist; Rock.**
Ro - "I enjoy it; The game can have a surprising amount of depth to it."
**Ro tossed Jakari the initial 75g on his way out.
The door was apparently built to slowly close on its own unless kept open, a soft 'click' leaving the jakari alone in the first room with the older man behind the counter.**
John - "Perhaps eating would make you feel better?"
**John vanishes into the back room, reappearing some 20 minutes later with a delicious looking meal of swan meat, stuffed artichokes, and a tantalizingly fresh side salad. That must be some basement.**
**He receives it! The meal tastes every bit as good as it looks, if not better. One would call it downright magical, in fact.**
Spring in Your Step - Jakari is currently filled with vim and vigor, his body resistant to disease and his injuries healing a bit faster than usual. Flowers occasionally pop out of the ground in the wake of his footsteps, becoming especially thick and beautiful in moments of joy or excitement. Grander still will be the flowers that blossom after a great success, this ability fading away with that final majestic bloom.
The mysterious inn turns out to be… quite brightly lit and, frankly, not very ominous at all. The walls have been painted white, the counters and numerous item-lined shelves are a pinkish marble, and the door marked “Billiards” to the far left is a deep blue. The stairs leading up to the rooms, same side as the pool, are also bluish in color. The door on the other side, marked “PAWN”, is a gaudy orange. The front of the counter is no color at all, the clear glass that showcasing the various foodstuffs, libations, and other consumables the owner will happily stuff down your gullet in exchange for gold.
An older man happily waits behind the counter for anything you might wish to ask about. He greets you, of course, a friendly “Hello! Here to buy something? Collect tax money? Tax collectors can go home, I already paid.”
All in-gold purchases limited to one per section per customer per visit.
Stuff you Eat!
**Eating food, very popular. All the young people are doing it. Our food? The BEST food. Be the talk of your city, town, and/or small collection of huts!
Bowl of Gruel – Pocket Change – Delicious, mouth-watering gruel. Mmh-Hmm!
Spiced Alogean Haggis – 10g – Delectable haggis, made with the finest mystery spices this side of Bakara! May have temporary side effects! Wears off eventually, no worries!
Slab of Giant Gorion Steak with Whistle-Tater Fries – 15g – Delicious! Nutritious! May have temporary side effects! Be normal by the end of your next quest, no worries!
Elexian Onion Stew – 15g – “Made with the finest stolen ingredients! Unless you’re a peackeeper. Then it was made with finest technically legal ingredients! Inspiring!”
Seasonal Fare <Spring>
Marbled Fowl with Stuffed Artichokes and Side Salad – 50g – Imported from the basement each day! Does stuff! Wonderful stuff! Can substitute giant mushrooms for artichokes.
Paragon Salad – 300g – Words cannot describe it. Everything. Best everything. WILL CHANGE YOU FOREVER!
Stuff you Drink!
Like eating, but without the fattening solid-ness! Don’t like how you look? I suggest blindfold and alcohol.
All purchases can be upgraded to extra tall for just 10g more! Tall drinks come with a complementary Four Seasons mug!
Tall Glass of water – Free! – Glass is not free. Don’t return glass? I release hounds.
Greevan Ale – Pocket Change – Fine elven beverage! Discount on the first cup!
Fancy Named Wines – 10g – “So many names! So fancy! Pick a name, drink it! May have minor side effects. Will wear off, no worries!”
Captain Jack’s Mystery Brew – 20g – “The captain loved this brew! He made it all the time. So much, in fact, that I still have barrels full of the stuff lying around... Try some today! Let my overstock be your fantastic deal!”
Seasonal Fare <Spring>
My’Kurrian Fruit Juice – 30g – A smooth blend of fruits and exotic plant-parts from the notable tropical island! But not the regular stuff! The really exotic stuff.
Sekoran Grove-Wine – 100g – Smooth. Textured. Calls up the natural world, says “This guy? This guy’s my best friend. Best friend. Hiccup.”
Medical Supplements!
Trust issues? No worries! I’m a professional salesman!
Seasonal <Spring>
Mind Trip Ticket - 40g - A thin vanilla wafer made with the finest potioning regents! Leaves your body out cold and your mind spiraling through a crazed journey of self discovery! Doesn't grant magic powers! Unless you consider being well-adjusted and free of past mental fetters a magical power! Become a new you today!
Collectibles and Other Fancy Stuff You Shouldn’t Eat
**Like collecting things? We have things! Things that go with things we don’t sell! Because we care.**
Mysterious Masks – 60g each – Featureless! Half-Masks! Masks of all shapes, sizes, sexual preferences, etc, etc. With or without eyeholes!
Mysterious Boxes – 100g each – Comes in four different varieties! Ask me for more information! Information like “One of the boxes is a creamy white with dashes of frosted blues and reds. Like a cake! Except you can’t eat it!”.
Seasonal <Spring>
Insect Repellant – Pocket Change – “Dislike insects? Use this oil! Do not eat!”
Floral Print Umbrellas – 30g – “Made of sugar? Like singing in rain, don’t like dancing with it? Buy one of these! Fine ironwood umbrella bearing a beautiful leather-strength covering. Highly resistant to water, electricity, and fire. Grip can extrude a sticky sap to keep it from being blown away. We think of everything!
Garden Filly – 200g – A plant horse! Flesh of living ironwood, mane of flowing vines, soft moss in place of fur, strong emerald hooves, eyes that look like pools of water that bear a single lily of exquisite beauty. Will grow up to be very strong, very fast, very loyal!
Pawning!
Go through the door, play a game of Rock, Paper, Scissors with the big man. You win? 150% Pawn! You lose? 25% Pawn! You tie? Normal (75%) Pawn!
Nervada - 98% fat free, high in fiber.
Eizen - Collected
Yack - Walking
Miko Wydberg
Tanya
Jakari - "I'm only in possession of fifteen gold."
Go ahead and run, you'll only die tired.
Those who might never meet are pooled together
John - "15 gold! You could buy a whole meal for that! Buy five meals, feed some kids! Unless they're teens, maybe feed teens two meals each. Teens eat a lot!"
Nervada - 98% fat free, high in fiber.
Eizen - Collected
Yack - Walking
Miko Wydberg
Tanya
JakariI - "Thinking of selling some things. don't really want to keep these things anyway."
Go ahead and run, you'll only die tired.
Those who might never meet are pooled together
John - "The man in the next room over buys many things! He's quite insistent on playing rock-paper-scissors to determine how good the deal is, perhaps you will show your skill!"
Nervada - 98% fat free, high in fiber.
Eizen - Collected
Yack - Walking
Miko Wydberg
Tanya
Go ahead and run, you'll only die tired.
Those who might never meet are pooled together
Ro - "Present each item in turn. I will tell you base pawning amount. You may accept or decline. If you accept, we will play a single game of rock paper scissors. If we tie, I will pay you the base amount. If you win, I will pay you double the base amount. If you lose, I will pay you one third the base amount."
**Another door is off to the side, it presumably leads to the storage room(s).**
Nervada - 98% fat free, high in fiber.
Eizen - Collected
Yack - Walking
Miko Wydberg
Tanya
Go ahead and run, you'll only die tired.
Those who might never meet are pooled together
Ro - "Deals offered do not need to be deals taken, but it is also true that deals rejected do not need to be replaced by deals offered. Decide as you will."
Nervada - 98% fat free, high in fiber.
Eizen - Collected
Yack - Walking
Miko Wydberg
Tanya
He pulled the sac off of his back and set it on the counter.
Go ahead and run, you'll only die tired.
Those who might never meet are pooled together
Ro - "That is.. an interpretation, but fine. I accept. My base offer for the voidsatchel is 75 gold."
Nervada - 98% fat free, high in fiber.
Eizen - Collected
Yack - Walking
Miko Wydberg
Tanya
Go ahead and run, you'll only die tired.
Those who might never meet are pooled together
**The hands are cast!**
Nervada - 98% fat free, high in fiber.
Eizen - Collected
Yack - Walking
Miko Wydberg
Tanya
He stared with steely eyes into the garr's eyes as he made his move. He figured that a man who relied on tricks to make his money off of travelers was likely a cheat anyway. He made his demeanor as intimidating as possible. He threw rock. If the garr blinked in the face of his intimidation and threw paper then the jakari would change to scissors.
Go ahead and run, you'll only die tired.
Those who might never meet are pooled together
**Ro had initially appeared somewhat bored with the whole affair, but his mood had perked up a bit at the Jakari's intimidation attempt. Granted, that probably wasn't what Jakari was hoping for.
In anycase, the garr throws out a fist that stays a fist; Rock.**
Nervada - 98% fat free, high in fiber.
Eizen - Collected
Yack - Walking
Miko Wydberg
Tanya
Jakari - "Let's go again."
He set his pistol on the counter and waited for the appraisal.
Go ahead and run, you'll only die tired.
Those who might never meet are pooled together
Nervada - 98% fat free, high in fiber.
Eizen - Collected
Yack - Walking
Miko Wydberg
Tanya
Go ahead and run, you'll only die tired.
Those who might never meet are pooled together
**Ro throws down another Rock.**
Nervada - 98% fat free, high in fiber.
Eizen - Collected
Yack - Walking
Miko Wydberg
Tanya
Jakari - "Damn game is boring anyway."
We walked out and sat against the counter grumbling something about a cheater."
Go ahead and run, you'll only die tired.
Those who might never meet are pooled together
**Ro tossed Jakari the initial 75g on his way out.
The door was apparently built to slowly close on its own unless kept open, a soft 'click' leaving the jakari alone in the first room with the older man behind the counter.**
John - "Perhaps eating would make you feel better?"
Nervada - 98% fat free, high in fiber.
Eizen - Collected
Yack - Walking
Miko Wydberg
Tanya
Jakari - "I'm having a hell of a day, why not... I'll have the spring special."
He tossed 50 gold onto the counter.
Go ahead and run, you'll only die tired.
Those who might never meet are pooled together
**John vanishes into the back room, reappearing some 20 minutes later with a delicious looking meal of swan meat, stuffed artichokes, and a tantalizingly fresh side salad. That must be some basement.**
John - "Any libations?"
Nervada - 98% fat free, high in fiber.
Eizen - Collected
Yack - Walking
Miko Wydberg
Tanya
Go ahead and run, you'll only die tired.
Those who might never meet are pooled together
Spring in Your Step - Jakari is currently filled with vim and vigor, his body resistant to disease and his injuries healing a bit faster than usual. Flowers occasionally pop out of the ground in the wake of his footsteps, becoming especially thick and beautiful in moments of joy or excitement. Grander still will be the flowers that blossom after a great success, this ability fading away with that final majestic bloom.
Nervada - 98% fat free, high in fiber.
Eizen - Collected
Yack - Walking
Miko Wydberg
Tanya