But I despise the notion that mythics need be great cards - heck, they don't even need to be good cards.
They don't have to be good, but they should be fun. This card isn't going to spark joy in anyone. A Pest token and a Fractal token would've changed the whole card. It's both a flavor fail and a power-level fail. That's fine at common, but not at the top rarity. I despise it when people defend WotC regardless of the company's obvious fail.
You could say, “they don’t have to be good but they should be fun” about literally every card in the set. Yeah, theoretically, that should be the criteria but it’s also a criteria that’s impossible to achieve for every card and for every player since fun is subjective.
What I’m against is a practice that drives up the price of the game for players. What you’re against is something easily overlooked given the hundreds of other cards in the set and the fact that this is one of the least likely cards to encounter. Seems like an easy decision to me lol.