Who would they be? What would they do? You know what I mean....in a party environment you have the loud party animals, the quiet fringe people, the wise older statesmen that's seen it all. Which would a planeswalker be? Would Sorin be the loud alcoholic or goth kid? Would Elspeth be the sad weeping drunk? Would Jace be the math nerd that the other planeswalkers finally convinced to do a keg stand to ruinous results?
Tell us, Blind Eternities, what your mighty avatars would do at a college kegger.
Private Mod Note
():
Rollback Post to RevisionRollBack
"Some say that time is cyclical and that history inevitably repeats. My will is my own. I won't bow to fate."
Ooh, this sounds like fun But this is going to be much harder than the previous "shove-a-planeswalker-into-guild" thread.
Ajani -- Just watches from the sides, occasionally checking on his close friends (such as Elspeth). Jace -- Party? No, he's not coming. What's that? The fruit punch's gone already? Must be that party animal Tibalt or Xenagos who drank them all. Liliana -- She'll probably head the drinking game. Or host the strip poker. Though maybe she won't be playing herself. Chandra -- I reckon she's gonnabe the standard party girl. Garruk -- I don't think he'll be coming. Unless Liliana is in there, in which case we need more bouncers. Elspeth -- Poor girl's probably gonna get cajoled into drinking despite her protests. Hope Ajani's nearby. Tezzeret -- He'll pick the best desserts first, probably. That, and being a party-pooper if you talk to him. Sarkhan -- The big eater, maybe. Sorin -- If the party doesn't have gourmet cuisine, he's out. Nissa -- If the party doesn't have elven dishes, she probably won't stick in. Gideon -- He may end up playing bouncer despite being in the party XD. Koth -- Hard to say... he'll probably just enoy the party as is without doing anything extraordinary. Venser -- Go for him for cocktails. Karn -- Sits and relaxes and occasionally intervenes in case something bad is about to happen. Tibalt -- Hope the bouncers can get him out, otherwise it's gonna get messy. Tamiyo -- She'll be writing a recipe book out of all the dishes XD. Vraska -- Plucks someone else's cupcake when they're not looking. Ral -- Be on stage showing off. Xenagos -- I don't know. Anything. Seriously. Ashiok -- A lurker in the shadows.... Much like Jace, I'd reckon.
Ooh, this sounds like fun But this is going to be much harder than the previous "shove-a-planeswalker-into-guild" thread.
Ajani -- Just watches from the sides, occasionally checking on his close friends (such as Elspeth). Jace -- Party? No, he's not coming. What's that? The fruit punch's gone already? Must be that party animal Tibalt or Xenagos who drank them all. Liliana -- She'll probably head the drinking game. Or host the strip poker. Though maybe she won't be playing herself. Chandra -- I reckon she's gonnabe the standard party girl. Garruk -- I don't think he'll be coming. Unless Liliana is in there, in which case we need more bouncers. Elspeth -- Poor girl's probably gonna get cajoled into drinking despite her protests. Hope Ajani's nearby. Tezzeret -- He'll pick the best desserts first, probably. That, and being a party-pooper if you talk to him. Sarkhan -- The big eater, maybe. Sorin -- If the party doesn't have gourmet cuisine, he's out. Nissa -- If the party doesn't have elven dishes, she probably won't stick in. Gideon -- He may end up playing bouncer despite being in the party XD. Koth -- Hard to say... he'll probably just enoy the party as is without doing anything extraordinary. Venser -- Go for him for cocktails. Karn -- Sits and relaxes and occasionally intervenes in case something bad is about to happen. Tibalt -- Hope the bouncers can get him out, otherwise it's gonna get messy. Tamiyo -- She'll be writing a recipe book out of all the dishes XD. Vraska -- Plucks someone else's cupcake when they're not looking. Ral -- Be on stage showing off. Xenagos -- I don't know. Anything. Seriously. Ashiok -- A lurker in the shadows.... Much like Jace, I'd reckon.
You forgot Domri Rade, he's outside trying to get past Gideon the Bouncer with a fake ID.
The scene everyone’s making is Nicol Bolas’s twenty-thousandth and twenty first birthday, and expense has been bloodied and brought to her knees in making sure that this is a memorable occasion. They’ve rented out Volrath’s Stronghold for it, hired Asmoranomardicadaistinaculdacar to cater and invited anyone who’s anyone in the multiverse.
And once everybody is here, what might they be doing? Are Jace and Chandra throwing back liquid courage with the promise of renewing their legendary rivalry? No, friends, Jace is drinking slowly tonight, wondering how bad Ravnica will look when he gets back, which guild will have killed another guild’s leader. It’s like being a babysitter, but the parents never get home, and Jace stares deep into his amber refuge. Chandra meanwhile is walking back and forth on the patio (out by all the mogg corpses), increasingly drunk, struggling to work up the courage to say something, anything to Gideon. How can she say what’s in her heart when they haven’t seen each other since Zendikar? The night will end with silent tears, nothing expressed but a final, longing gaze at Mr. Jura.
So what is Gideon doing here, anyway? Our straight-laced lawbringer is throwing them back with Garruk, memories of long-over battles drifting in their minds. Do these men have troubles? It’s an understatement. And slowly develops into a contest of clinking ice and set chins. The curtain will close with them slumping on their stools until one of them, we cannot tell who, slips off to the floor in blurry defeat.
But what party is without its animals? Are those notorious wild children Liliana, Tybalt and Sarkhan getting wrecked, getting naked, getting the place raided? No, my friends, things are never quite what we expect at this sort of party. Liliana Vess has sequestered herself in the only bathroom (Volrath didn't need more than that, everyone else could 'go' in the Death Pits), makeup smeared, veil askew, her clothes covered in swiftly-drying vomit as she wonders who she can call to pick her up before anyone finds out she tossed her cookies after one drink. Tybalt, of course, is abstaining this evening. Liquor and fatty food dull the senses to pain. He finds something light to eat and a nice, hard-backed chair, and plots against the poor souls of Innistrad for shunning his work. As for Sarkhan Vol? Standing on the furniture, bemoaning the death of decent dragons to anyone who will hear. Nobody does. It scarcely matters though, since this party is coming out of Vol's paycheck, much to his surprise when he checks his balance at Unbroken Alara Financial Group. "What do you mean I'm overdrawn? Bolas!" He screams to the sky, shaking his impotent fist.
The real party is happening with Nissa and Elsepth. with the music cranked in every room, they're prepared to cut loose. Weeks before the party, they conconted their plan to shed these good girl personas, and show the multiverse just how crazy they could be. Elsepth arrives, gets a drink in each hand and someone makes sure they stay filled. Within an hour, she's thrown off her hood, cape and fifty pounds of armor, is dancing in her panties, sweating madly and gyrating atop a flowstone bust of Vhati-il-Dal. When she is escorted out in handuffs, face shiny with booze, Elsepth will wonder what happened to Nissa. The elf maiden of Zendikar, however, did not throw inhibition to the wind. Instead she concludes that none of these people are elves, and their opinions of her are thus irrelevant. The night draws on, and finds her sneaking away with Koth of the Hammer. Daddy will be so, so pissed (obviously because Koth's human, not elvish.)
Xenagos will stub the carpet with his hooves, jealous as hell, muttering about how his parties are always way better than this, and how once he's a god, everyone will see what a real bash looks like. The Reveler leaves early to tell all his friends how much the party sucked.
Tamiyo is telling Venser's corpse about her latest trip to Rabiah the Infinite, which is of course, a misnomer. She mistakes his decomposition for rapt interest, and spends hours detailing her latest research paper to be published in The Muraganda Review, "Wildfire: Being a Historically Condesnded Account of the Political and Sociological Resolutions Guiding Hierarchical Structure amongst Djinn, Efreeti, Marids, et al." Her own parents won't even read it.
Lying down in Volrath's old bedroom is Karn, having wicked flashbacks, cursing every bad decision he's ever made, wondering why he even came to this stupid party. Ajani, decent soul, will check in on the silver golem occasionally, but quickly forget when he learns Ral Zarek is setting the drinks on fire. Not one to listen to bipedal albino lion-men, Ral will delight in his mischief, irritating everyone until somebody accidentally knocks him into the Furnace of Rath.
In a distant corner of the Stronghold, Tezzeret and Vraska are having a deep, penetrating conversation. Bonding over greasy canapes, they will learn how much they have in common, and make plans neither will keep in spite of their connection. Vraska has difficulty with commitment and Tezzeret needs to get his apron back on before someone reminds him the help isn't supposed to fraternize.
Our man Sorin, an ageless, decadent vampire, will see Ashiok across the room, look at his list, find 'faceless, sinister, ambiguous entity', check it off with force, and stride casually over to start up a conversation that will end much later in rumpled clothes, specatacular moans and a smoky taste left in one's mouth.
Domri Rade will not attend. After being forbidden to go, sneaking out and getting caught, he is grounded until the next decamillenium.
But we cannot forget Nicol Bolas, the dragon of the hour. Unfortunately, he's forgotten his own party. Time has taken its toll on the elder dragon, and while the media may craft stories of his intricate plots, webs and webs of lies that run deep and strong, the truth is that Bolas has spent the last several years in the Shady Sakura Kamigawa Nursing Home. He would be angry, if he remembered how. Sadly though, all the most ancient of evils can do is struggle against the rising tide, the slow march that spares no one, planeswalker, dragon, leonin, or silver golem. Nicol Bolas will be told it was a killer party, understand nothing, and sink back into his blissful, growing haze.
Somewhere far away, in a nameless tavern on a nameless plane, Baltrice nurses a glass of fireball whiskey. "***** stole my schtick," she mutters. "Fire elementals? My thing." She takes another sip, feeling the alcohol burn as it flows through her. "Thinks she's so pretty, posing in pinups with that whore Vess, flouncing around the multiverse in that tight chainmail and those stupid goggles like some kind of welder debutante."
The barkeep, a minotaur with a symphathetic ear and a limited vocabulary, pours her another drink. "On house," he snorts. She doesn't seem to notice.
"I shoulda been at that party!" she bellows. "If that uptight jerk Gideon got an invite, I shoulda gotten one too. Thinks he's better than me because he's not stuck in backwater questionable canon, with his two cards and ties to Ravnica and that stupid whipy thing."
A bedraggled man with crazy eyes puts his arm around her. "I know that feels," Ramaz sighs, "believe me I know."
She doesn't know if it's the whiskey or the loneliness, but she feels a warmth in her heart that's been absent far too long. She sees in Ramaz a kindred spirit. They clink their glasses, and throw back another whiskey. "Why don't we move this party up to my room?" she whispers, taking his hand.
I'm not saying it's a good book, or that it should be taken seriously, or that it isn't directly responsible for killing printed Magic books; I'm just saying that was a thing that was said, was it not?
I'm not saying it's a good book, or that it should be taken seriously, or that it isn't directly responsible for killing printed Magic books; I'm just saying that was a thing that was said, was it not?
What the hell is blinkmoth serum? I meant more along the lines of Potters Gin or Listerine. Venser doesn't care. The guy would drink gasoline if it got him back to normal.
Private Mod Note
():
Rollback Post to RevisionRollBack
"Some say that time is cyclical and that history inevitably repeats. My will is my own. I won't bow to fate."
Right, I forgot Domri. But yeah, I guess little mister underaged would get barred and try to sneak in after that
As for Xenagos, maybe I was too brief; what I meant was hey, it's a party, he'll do anything worth doing in a party
Maybe the other planeys should get a guess too:
Dack -- He's probably going to be in the guard post. Looking at the security cams Sifa -- BDSM-time, baby Kiora -- Might serve as a nice, if wild, party-goer. Just don't offer her seafood.
What the hell is blinkmoth serum? I meant more along the lines of Potters Gin or Listerine. Venser doesn't care. The guy would drink gasoline if it got him back to normal.
I don't know why Wizards is so sanitary with their portrayal of planeswalkers. They're obviously a loose group of discontented, bitter individuals who just happen to be able to make good travel arrangements.
Liliana Vess doesn't actually like posing in costumes for Steve Argyle altered cards or floating through Innistrad with her chest laced up tight and her thong hanging out. She probably doesn't even care about chasing down demons any longer. But Wizards won't keep marketing her if she suddenly gains a pound, so she continues down a road of beeble-flavored laxative abuse and moral unfulfillment.
Planeswalkers are awful, unhappy people you would avoid in real life, much less go to a party they were attending. The old planeswalkers were probably a lot more fun. Imagine a celebrity roast, with Urza nudging his brother in the ribs over their 'little scuffle' in Argoth. Dignified, amusing drunks who tell off-color jokes and occasionally forget their lines. You don't mind, though. You're too busy remembering how funny Leshrac used to be, not focusing on his current struggle to pronounce "Freyalise" without passing out.
The scene everyone’s making is Nicol Bolas’s twenty-thousandth and twenty first birthday, and expense has been bloodied and brought to her knees in making sure that this is a memorable occasion. They’ve rented out Volrath’s Stronghold for it, hired Asmoranomardicadaistinaculdacar to cater and invited anyone who’s anyone in the multiverse.
And once everybody is here, what might they be doing? Are Jace and Chandra throwing back liquid courage with the promise of renewing their legendary rivalry? No, friends, Jace is drinking slowly tonight, wondering how bad Ravnica will look when he gets back, which guild will have killed another guild’s leader. It’s like being a babysitter, but the parents never get home, and Jace stares deep into his amber refuge. Chandra meanwhile is walking back and forth on the patio (out by all the mogg corpses), increasingly drunk, struggling to work up the courage to say something, anything to Gideon. How can she say what’s in her heart when they haven’t seen each other since Zendikar? The night will end with silent tears, nothing expressed but a final, longing gaze at Mr. Jura.
So what is Gideon doing here, anyway? Our straight-laced lawbringer is throwing them back with Garruk, memories of long-over battles drifting in their minds. Do these men have troubles? It’s an understatement. And slowly develops into a contest of clinking ice and set chins. The curtain will close with them slumping on their stools until one of them, we cannot tell who, slips off to the floor in blurry defeat.
But what party is without its animals? Are those notorious wild children Liliana, Tybalt and Sarkhan getting wrecked, getting naked, getting the place raided? No, my friends, things are never quite what we expect at this sort of party. Liliana Vess has sequestered herself in the only bathroom (Volrath didn't need more than that, everyone else could 'go' in the Death Pits), makeup smeared, veil askew, her clothes covered in swiftly-drying vomit as she wonders who she can call to pick her up before anyone finds out she tossed her cookies after one drink. Tybalt, of course, is abstaining this evening. Liquor and fatty food dull the senses to pain. He finds something light to eat and a nice, hard-backed chair, and plots against the poor souls of Innistrad for shunning his work. As for Sarkhan Vol? Standing on the furniture, bemoaning the death of decent dragons to anyone who will hear. Nobody does. It scarcely matters though, since this party is coming out of Vol's paycheck, much to his surprise when he checks his balance at Unbroken Alara Financial Group. "What do you mean I'm overdrawn? Bolas!" He screams to the sky, shaking his impotent fist.
The real party is happening with Nissa and Elsepth. with the music cranked in every room, they're prepared to cut loose. Weeks before the party, they conconted their plan to shed these good girl personas, and show the multiverse just how crazy they could be. Elsepth arrives, gets a drink in each hand and someone makes sure they stay filled. Within an hour, she's thrown off her hood, cape and fifty pounds of armor, is dancing in her panties, sweating madly and gyrating atop a flowstone bust of Vhati-il-Dal. When she is escorted out in handuffs, face shiny with booze, Elsepth will wonder what happened to Nissa. The elf maiden of Zendikar, however, did not throw inhibition to the wind. Instead she concludes that none of these people are elves, and their opinions of her are thus irrelevant. The night draws on, and finds her sneaking away with Koth of the Hammer. Daddy will be so, so pissed (obviously because Koth's human, not elvish.)
Xenagos will stub the carpet with his hooves, jealous as hell, muttering about how his parties are always way better than this, and how once he's a god, everyone will see what a real bash looks like. The Reveler leaves early to tell all his friends how much the party sucked.
Tamiyo is telling Venser's corpse about her latest trip to Rabiah the Infinite, which is of course, a misnomer. She mistakes his decomposition for rapt interest, and spends hours detailing her latest research paper to be published in The Muraganda Review, "Wildfire: Being a Historically Condesnded Account of the Political and Sociological Resolutions Guiding Hierarchical Structure amongst Djinn, Efreeti, Marids, et al." Her own parents won't even read it.
Lying down in Volrath's old bedroom is Karn, having wicked flashbacks, cursing every bad decision he's ever made, wondering why he even came to this stupid party. Ajani, decent soul, will check in on the silver golem occasionally, but quickly forget when he learns Ral Zarek is setting the drinks on fire. Not one to listen to bipedal albino lion-men, Ral will delight in his mischief, irritating everyone until somebody accidentally knocks him into the Furnace of Rath.
In a distant corner of the Stronghold, Tezzeret and Vraska are having a deep, penetrating conversation. Bonding over greasy canapes, they will learn how much they have in common, and make plans neither will keep in spite of their connection. Vraska has difficulty with commitment and Tezzeret needs to get his apron back on before someone reminds him the help isn't supposed to fraternize.
Our man Sorin, an ageless, decadent vampire, will see Ashiok across the room, look at his list, find 'faceless, sinister, ambiguous entity', check it off with force, and stride casually over to start up a conversation that will end much later in rumpled clothes, specatacular moans and a smoky taste left in one's mouth.
Domri Rade will not attend. After being forbidden to go, sneaking out and getting caught, he is grounded until the next decamillenium.
But we cannot forget Nicol Bolas, the dragon of the hour. Unfortunately, he's forgotten his own party. Time has taken its toll on the elder dragon, and while the media may craft stories of his intricate plots, webs and webs of lies that run deep and strong, the truth is that Bolas has spent the last several years in the Shady Sakura Kamigawa Nursing Home. He would be angry, if he remembered how. Sadly though, all the most ancient of evils can do is struggle against the rising tide, the slow march that spares no one, planeswalker, dragon, leonin, or silver golem. Nicol Bolas will be told it was a killer party, understand nothing, and sink back into his blissful, growing haze.
This was too many kinds of awesome. i want to do one of these of my own now. I salute you
Lying down in Volrath's old bedroom is Karn, having wicked flashbacks, cursing every bad decision he's ever made, wondering why he even came to this stupid party.
Yeah, I can't imagine that being in Volrath's Stronghold would be very conducive to bringing back happy memories for Karn. He really shouldn't have gone to that party.
Yeah, I can't imagine that being in Volrath's Stronghold would be very conducive to bringing back happy memories for Karn. He really shouldn't have gone to that party.
Karn is a self-destructive sourball. He insists he's a pacifist who would never hurt anyone, but goes to a lot of trouble to put himself in situations where danger is imminent. "Oh, I didn't mean to kill that mogg! Now I'm sad and I'll just stand here being sad while the minotaur I'm with gets punched in the crotch."
Just like he never 'meant' for the Mirari to be used for evil, didn't 'mean' to bring Phyrexian oil to Mirrodin. And the worst part is he knows someone will bail him out, so he never learns to accept responsibility. Because of Karn, Venser's dead, Koth is probably dead and Elspeth wrote her this-is-a-cry-for-help letter to Ajani before escaping to Theros.
So maybe Karn shouldn't have gone to the party, but nothing was going to stop him from being there. What would he do with his life if there wasn't anything to complain about?
Well, how about we list some of the oldie walkers in the house too? I mean, they're planeswalkers, so they still fit the topic
Teferi -- For the love of Barrin, do NOT invite him. He's caused enough problems in the classroom when someone's supervising him. Bo Levar -- A fine cigar in the mouth, a glass of martini in hand. A picture of party perfection. In fact, maybe he and Sorin would get along in a party seeing that they fit the high-class-men type. Nicol Bolas -- Maybe HE'S the one in the security guard post watching the security cam footages Jaya -- Either enjoying the party or doing a stand-up comedy. She's a pro snarker, right? Urza -- Rambles on and on about how these potential talents are wasting their time away in the party. Guff -- Rambles on and on about... eh, I don't know what XD. Maybe conversing with Urza too.
Tell us, Blind Eternities, what your mighty avatars would do at a college kegger.
Volrath the FallenB Empress GalinaU Oona, Queen of the FaeBUAgrus Kos, Wojek VeteranRW
Ajani -- Just watches from the sides, occasionally checking on his close friends (such as Elspeth).
Jace -- Party? No, he's not coming. What's that? The fruit punch's gone already? Must be that party animal Tibalt or Xenagos who drank them all.
Liliana -- She'll probably head the drinking game. Or host the strip poker. Though maybe she won't be playing herself.
Chandra -- I reckon she's gonnabe the standard party girl.
Garruk -- I don't think he'll be coming. Unless Liliana is in there, in which case we need more bouncers.
Elspeth -- Poor girl's probably gonna get cajoled into drinking despite her protests. Hope Ajani's nearby.
Tezzeret -- He'll pick the best desserts first, probably. That, and being a party-pooper if you talk to him.
Sarkhan -- The big eater, maybe.
Sorin -- If the party doesn't have gourmet cuisine, he's out.
Nissa -- If the party doesn't have elven dishes, she probably won't stick in.
Gideon -- He may end up playing bouncer despite being in the party XD.
Koth -- Hard to say... he'll probably just enoy the party as is without doing anything extraordinary.
Venser -- Go for him for cocktails.
Karn -- Sits and relaxes and occasionally intervenes in case something bad is about to happen.
Tibalt -- Hope the bouncers can get him out, otherwise it's gonna get messy.
Tamiyo -- She'll be writing a recipe book out of all the dishes XD.
Vraska -- Plucks someone else's cupcake when they're not looking.
Ral -- Be on stage showing off.
Xenagos -- I don't know. Anything. Seriously.
Ashiok -- A lurker in the shadows.... Much like Jace, I'd reckon.
You forgot Domri Rade, he's outside trying to get past Gideon the Bouncer with a fake ID.
Volrath the FallenB Empress GalinaU Oona, Queen of the FaeBUAgrus Kos, Wojek VeteranRW
@_kaburi_ on Twitter
Special thanks to Serrot_29 for Catbug'mrakul!
And once everybody is here, what might they be doing? Are Jace and Chandra throwing back liquid courage with the promise of renewing their legendary rivalry? No, friends, Jace is drinking slowly tonight, wondering how bad Ravnica will look when he gets back, which guild will have killed another guild’s leader. It’s like being a babysitter, but the parents never get home, and Jace stares deep into his amber refuge. Chandra meanwhile is walking back and forth on the patio (out by all the mogg corpses), increasingly drunk, struggling to work up the courage to say something, anything to Gideon. How can she say what’s in her heart when they haven’t seen each other since Zendikar? The night will end with silent tears, nothing expressed but a final, longing gaze at Mr. Jura.
So what is Gideon doing here, anyway? Our straight-laced lawbringer is throwing them back with Garruk, memories of long-over battles drifting in their minds. Do these men have troubles? It’s an understatement. And slowly develops into a contest of clinking ice and set chins. The curtain will close with them slumping on their stools until one of them, we cannot tell who, slips off to the floor in blurry defeat.
But what party is without its animals? Are those notorious wild children Liliana, Tybalt and Sarkhan getting wrecked, getting naked, getting the place raided? No, my friends, things are never quite what we expect at this sort of party. Liliana Vess has sequestered herself in the only bathroom (Volrath didn't need more than that, everyone else could 'go' in the Death Pits), makeup smeared, veil askew, her clothes covered in swiftly-drying vomit as she wonders who she can call to pick her up before anyone finds out she tossed her cookies after one drink. Tybalt, of course, is abstaining this evening. Liquor and fatty food dull the senses to pain. He finds something light to eat and a nice, hard-backed chair, and plots against the poor souls of Innistrad for shunning his work. As for Sarkhan Vol? Standing on the furniture, bemoaning the death of decent dragons to anyone who will hear. Nobody does. It scarcely matters though, since this party is coming out of Vol's paycheck, much to his surprise when he checks his balance at Unbroken Alara Financial Group. "What do you mean I'm overdrawn? Bolas!" He screams to the sky, shaking his impotent fist.
The real party is happening with Nissa and Elsepth. with the music cranked in every room, they're prepared to cut loose. Weeks before the party, they conconted their plan to shed these good girl personas, and show the multiverse just how crazy they could be. Elsepth arrives, gets a drink in each hand and someone makes sure they stay filled. Within an hour, she's thrown off her hood, cape and fifty pounds of armor, is dancing in her panties, sweating madly and gyrating atop a flowstone bust of Vhati-il-Dal. When she is escorted out in handuffs, face shiny with booze, Elsepth will wonder what happened to Nissa. The elf maiden of Zendikar, however, did not throw inhibition to the wind. Instead she concludes that none of these people are elves, and their opinions of her are thus irrelevant. The night draws on, and finds her sneaking away with Koth of the Hammer. Daddy will be so, so pissed (obviously because Koth's human, not elvish.)
Xenagos will stub the carpet with his hooves, jealous as hell, muttering about how his parties are always way better than this, and how once he's a god, everyone will see what a real bash looks like. The Reveler leaves early to tell all his friends how much the party sucked.
Tamiyo is telling Venser's corpse about her latest trip to Rabiah the Infinite, which is of course, a misnomer. She mistakes his decomposition for rapt interest, and spends hours detailing her latest research paper to be published in The Muraganda Review, "Wildfire: Being a Historically Condesnded Account of the Political and Sociological Resolutions Guiding Hierarchical Structure amongst Djinn, Efreeti, Marids, et al." Her own parents won't even read it.
Lying down in Volrath's old bedroom is Karn, having wicked flashbacks, cursing every bad decision he's ever made, wondering why he even came to this stupid party. Ajani, decent soul, will check in on the silver golem occasionally, but quickly forget when he learns Ral Zarek is setting the drinks on fire. Not one to listen to bipedal albino lion-men, Ral will delight in his mischief, irritating everyone until somebody accidentally knocks him into the Furnace of Rath.
In a distant corner of the Stronghold, Tezzeret and Vraska are having a deep, penetrating conversation. Bonding over greasy canapes, they will learn how much they have in common, and make plans neither will keep in spite of their connection. Vraska has difficulty with commitment and Tezzeret needs to get his apron back on before someone reminds him the help isn't supposed to fraternize.
Our man Sorin, an ageless, decadent vampire, will see Ashiok across the room, look at his list, find 'faceless, sinister, ambiguous entity', check it off with force, and stride casually over to start up a conversation that will end much later in rumpled clothes, specatacular moans and a smoky taste left in one's mouth.
Domri Rade will not attend. After being forbidden to go, sneaking out and getting caught, he is grounded until the next decamillenium.
But we cannot forget Nicol Bolas, the dragon of the hour. Unfortunately, he's forgotten his own party. Time has taken its toll on the elder dragon, and while the media may craft stories of his intricate plots, webs and webs of lies that run deep and strong, the truth is that Bolas has spent the last several years in the Shady Sakura Kamigawa Nursing Home. He would be angry, if he remembered how. Sadly though, all the most ancient of evils can do is struggle against the rising tide, the slow march that spares no one, planeswalker, dragon, leonin, or silver golem. Nicol Bolas will be told it was a killer party, understand nothing, and sink back into his blissful, growing haze.
Volrath the FallenB Empress GalinaU Oona, Queen of the FaeBUAgrus Kos, Wojek VeteranRW
Really!? Xenagos' character is entirely defined as a fratboy that became disilusioned with the truth, for crying out loud!
He'd probably be going through the motions, but inwardly feel emptiness and bitterness.
The barkeep, a minotaur with a symphathetic ear and a limited vocabulary, pours her another drink. "On house," he snorts. She doesn't seem to notice.
"I shoulda been at that party!" she bellows. "If that uptight jerk Gideon got an invite, I shoulda gotten one too. Thinks he's better than me because he's not stuck in backwater questionable canon, with his two cards and ties to Ravnica and that stupid whipy thing."
A bedraggled man with crazy eyes puts his arm around her. "I know that feels," Ramaz sighs, "believe me I know."
She doesn't know if it's the whiskey or the loneliness, but she feels a warmth in her heart that's been absent far too long. She sees in Ramaz a kindred spirit. They clink their glasses, and throw back another whiskey. "Why don't we move this party up to my room?" she whispers, taking his hand.
@_kaburi_ on Twitter
Special thanks to Serrot_29 for Catbug'mrakul!
Didn't Quest for Karn state that he was an abuser of Blinkmoth Serum?
Level 1 Judge
I write flavor articles for RoxieCards.
I play and judge at Giga Bites Cafein Marietta, Georgia.
Quest for Karn stated a lot of things.
@_kaburi_ on Twitter
Special thanks to Serrot_29 for Catbug'mrakul!
Level 1 Judge
I write flavor articles for RoxieCards.
I play and judge at Giga Bites Cafein Marietta, Georgia.
Yes it did say that (Venser's addiction that is).
Level 1 Judge
I write flavor articles for RoxieCards.
I play and judge at Giga Bites Cafein Marietta, Georgia.
Volrath the FallenB Empress GalinaU Oona, Queen of the FaeBUAgrus Kos, Wojek VeteranRW
As for Xenagos, maybe I was too brief; what I meant was hey, it's a party, he'll do anything worth doing in a party
Maybe the other planeys should get a guess too:
Dack -- He's probably going to be in the guard post. Looking at the security cams
Sifa -- BDSM-time, baby
Kiora -- Might serve as a nice, if wild, party-goer. Just don't offer her seafood.
It's Hip to be a Square
Ral is an attention whore through and through, he would have to be at the center of everything and woe be it to anyone who took that away from him.
Dack is making out with other people's girlfriends and stealing wallets from the coat rack.
Serum made from Blinkmoths, I'd imagine.
Level 1 Judge
I write flavor articles for RoxieCards.
I play and judge at Giga Bites Cafein Marietta, Georgia.
Liliana Vess doesn't actually like posing in costumes for Steve Argyle altered cards or floating through Innistrad with her chest laced up tight and her thong hanging out. She probably doesn't even care about chasing down demons any longer. But Wizards won't keep marketing her if she suddenly gains a pound, so she continues down a road of beeble-flavored laxative abuse and moral unfulfillment.
Planeswalkers are awful, unhappy people you would avoid in real life, much less go to a party they were attending. The old planeswalkers were probably a lot more fun. Imagine a celebrity roast, with Urza nudging his brother in the ribs over their 'little scuffle' in Argoth. Dignified, amusing drunks who tell off-color jokes and occasionally forget their lines. You don't mind, though. You're too busy remembering how funny Leshrac used to be, not focusing on his current struggle to pronounce "Freyalise" without passing out.
This was too many kinds of awesome. i want to do one of these of my own now. I salute you
You can check out my artwork here and here
Yeah, I can't imagine that being in Volrath's Stronghold would be very conducive to bringing back happy memories for Karn. He really shouldn't have gone to that party.
Karn is a self-destructive sourball. He insists he's a pacifist who would never hurt anyone, but goes to a lot of trouble to put himself in situations where danger is imminent. "Oh, I didn't mean to kill that mogg! Now I'm sad and I'll just stand here being sad while the minotaur I'm with gets punched in the crotch."
Just like he never 'meant' for the Mirari to be used for evil, didn't 'mean' to bring Phyrexian oil to Mirrodin. And the worst part is he knows someone will bail him out, so he never learns to accept responsibility. Because of Karn, Venser's dead, Koth is probably dead and Elspeth wrote her this-is-a-cry-for-help letter to Ajani before escaping to Theros.
So maybe Karn shouldn't have gone to the party, but nothing was going to stop him from being there. What would he do with his life if there wasn't anything to complain about?
Teferi -- For the love of Barrin, do NOT invite him. He's caused enough problems in the classroom when someone's supervising him.
Bo Levar -- A fine cigar in the mouth, a glass of martini in hand. A picture of party perfection. In fact, maybe he and Sorin would get along in a party seeing that they fit the high-class-men type.
Nicol Bolas -- Maybe HE'S the one in the security guard post watching the security cam footages
Jaya -- Either enjoying the party or doing a stand-up comedy. She's a pro snarker, right?
Urza -- Rambles on and on about how these potential talents are wasting their time away in the party.
Guff -- Rambles on and on about... eh, I don't know what XD. Maybe conversing with Urza too.
Not sure about the rest