Adventures in Segovia This is not a stable time loop.
What a mess. You finally get your reports in, and you can sense them being put into a file without even being read. The only response? "We've got some new locations for you to look at."
Sighing, you each make your way to a new plane, to produce more paperwork that undoubtedly won't be looked at, either...
The poll will close shortly after 2pm Pacific, Thursday, November 8th. May the best evaluator win!
Our final three is:
The plane of Tombstone is home to goblin cowboys, angel snipers, and demons of all alignments. Unfortunately, it's also home to the nastiest range war you've ever seen, between the forces of the dwarven Governor of Butte County, Dougal MacAngus, and the gang known only as The Shadows...
Butte Country Gunslinger1RR
Creature - Dwarf Warrior (R)
First strike, protection from white
Whenever Butte Country Gunslinger deals combat damage to a player, add RR to your mana pool at the beginning of your next main phase.
2/2
Shadow Gunslinger1WW
Creature - Human Warrior (R)
First strike, protection from red
Whenever Shadows Gunslinger deals combat damage to a player, that player can't cast spells during his or her next turn unless he or she pays 2 before that turn.
2/2
Wings of the Fiend1WB
Sorcery (U)
Target creature gets +2/+2 and gains flying until end of turn. When that creature dies this turn, each of its controller's opponents puts a 5/5 black Demon creature token with flying onto the battlefield.
Fish in a Barrel2R
Enchantment - Aura (U)
Enchant creature
Creatures you control have ":symtap:: This creature deals 2 damage to the creature Fish in a Barrel is enchanting."
Haber's Goldmine
Legendary Land (R) T: Add 1 to your mana pool. T, Sacrifice Haber's Goldmine: Add one mana of any color to your mana pool.
Tap two untapped creatures you control: Return Haber's Goldmine from your graveyard to the battlefield.
Steed of the ShadowsWUBRG
Legendary Creature - Horse Avatar (M)
Trample
At the beginning of your upkeep, put a +1/+1 counter on Steed of the Shadows, then target opponent sacrifices a permanent for each +1/+1 counter on Steed of the Shadows.
4/4
It's hard to believe that magic would still thrive in a world like Anguya - a world not too far off Earth in the 1970s. Here, the main fight is between organized crime, corrupt politicians and policemen, and private investigators like Samuel Shortman, a giant with a taste for candy and a need for justice.
Taking care of this now before the hurricane takes me out.
The Prompt: It's hard to believe that magic would still thrive in a world like Anguya - a world not too far off Earth in the 1970s.
Here, the main fight is between organized crime, corrupt politicians and policemen, and private investigators like Samuel Shortman,
a giant with a taste for candy and a need for justice.
The Cards:
Blameless Bureaucrat :symb::symb:
Creature - Giant Advisor (U)
Intimidate
If damage would be dealt to Blameless Bureaucrat, prevent that damage. Target creature you control gets -X/-X until end of turn, where X is equal to the amount of damage prevented in this way. "There are only two kinds of people as far as the bureaucrats are concerned: the pawns and the scapegoats." - Samuel Shortman, Private Eye
2/2
Courageous Cop :symw::symw:
Creature - Giant Soldier (U)
Vigilance
If damage would be dealt to another creature you control, you may prevent that damage. If you do, Courageous Cop gets -X/-X until end of turn, where X is equal to the amount of damage prevented in this way. "Not all the cops are bad, sure, but the good ones don't usually last long." - Samuel Shortman, Private Eye
2/2
Arcanum Pistol
Artifact - Equipment (U)
Equipped creature has ":symtap:: Put two charge counters on Arcanum Pistol."
Equipped creature has ":symtap:, Remove a charge counter from Arcanum Pistol: Arcanum Pistol deals 1 damage to target creature or player."
Equip :sym2r::sym2r:
Giant's Frenzy :symr::symg:
Instant (U)
Put a +1/+1 counter on target creature. It gains double strike until end of turn. "Alright, who took my candy?" - Samuel Shortman,
City Hall
Land (R)
:symwb:, :symtap:: Reveal the top three cards of your library. For each Plains or Swamp card revealed in this way, you may sacrifice a permanent. If you do, put that card onto the battlefield. Put the rest into your graveyard. "Any objections to the new zoning laws? Good." - Mayor Tanney, first council session following the funeral of Alderman Lansig
Municipal Power Core :sym2w::sym2u::sym2b::sym2r::sym2g:
Artifact (M)
:2mana:: Add one mana of any color to your mana pool.
:4mana:: Untap up to four target permanents.
:6mana:, Sacrifice Municipal Power Core: Destroy all nonland permanents. They can't be regenerated. "Our engineers assure me that it is perfectly safe." - Mayor Tanney
You get stuck with all the bad assignments. This time, you're stuck on a world where everything is kind of slimy. In fact, everything is composed of oozes of varying sizes, which can join together to form larger creatures. This is the world of Tewuru...
Wow, I'm really surprised that I got this far! Tough challenge Denham but I see where you are coming from with your idea for my plane (I have seen your old card designs regarding it).
Good luck with the hurricane PenguinTod. I quite like some of your cards
Now onto my entry. Please regard or disregard as much of the story precis as you like before each pair of cards, it is merely there to frame the ideas I had behind the cards.
Tewuru
You get stuck with all the bad assignments. This time, you're stuck on a world where everything is kind of slimy. In fact, everything is composed of oozes of varying sizes, which can join together to form larger creatures. This is the world of Tewuru...
I arrive where I need to be. Looking around I see why I'm the one who has been sent here by the consortium. There is slime everywhere. From the trees and plants of the forest around me gunk of all colours of the spectrum exits the stems and trunks like an infected pus. Just outside the treeline I can see a city of some kind and even there I can see the buildings are shimmering in the sunlight. As I attempt to start out towards it I look down and see my boots encompassed in slime that comes from pores in the ground. It moves as though it has some kind of rudimentary intelligence and I expect that if I don't do something soon I will be immobilised completely. I summon up my most protective magics to attack the slime that is enveloping me, causing it to slop down onto the ground in a limp and hopefully lifeless form. I scoop up some of the slime and examine it. It quickly crusts up in my hands turning harder than leather and I experiment with its uses to protect me from the further threat of ground attack.
(An instant/sorcery removal spell and an enchantment/artifact combat enhancer pair)
Personal Shield1W
Instant (C)
Destroy all creatures blocking or being blocked by target creature you control. "I have to complete this mission and I refuse to let you get in the way." - Gideon Jura
Slime Soled Boots2
Artifact - Equipment (C)
Equipped creature gets +1/+1.
If there is an Ooze card in your graveyard, equipped creature gets +1/+1 and has trample.
Equip 1
After a trek through the forest with little further incident I find the city I'd seen earlier. Much to my surprise it is totally deserted. I walk up to the nearest building and scrape away at the wall. Below the irridescent grime I see clay bricks much like I'd seen on other worlds indicating that the buildings are at least man made. Something must have forced them to flee as I don't see any corpses around, nothing but this horrible muck everywhere. I continue searching the city, scraping at the walls until I find what I was hoping for, a large building denoted as a library by a plaque on the front. I need to find out what happened here before it happens to me. After a lengthy search I find some scraps of scientific paper that shed some light on the matter. As I'm reading, my mouth agape, I don't hear the slithering of the creatures. Just as I see a humanoid like monster jump up from the floor, something drops onto my back from above.
(A mirrored pair of creatures)
Tome Eater3UU
Creature - Human Mutant (U)
Flash
Exile an instant or sorcery card in your graveyard: Tome Eater gets +1/+1 and gains flying until end of turn. The remnants of previous meals still inspire it to learn.
3/3
Bone Eater3BB
Creature - Human Mutant (U)
Lifelink
Exile a creature card in your graveyard: Bone Eater gets +1/+1 and gains intimidate until end of turn. The remnants of previous meals still inspire it to feed.
3/3
After a fierce battle with the horrific creatures I just about survive with my life, and with a few scraps of information from the paper I'd found. It's clear that the slime has the capability to mutate the natural life around it so I can't stay here long. I followed the trail to the laboratory of the paper's author, Dr Lanessa Vitrion. I finally find the Algaré lab and start to search around for further information. Vitrion, and in fact the whole of Tewuru used to be an average plane it seems before one of her genetic engineering experiments went wrong. She was working on a way to advance evolution beyond the natural and produce a living, intelligent being that could withstand all conditions and could be bred for any scenario. From the records it seems the experimentation escaped and bred, absorbing living things around it, killing everyone that couldn't escape. It mutated, evolved and reproduced until it covered the entire land. That explains the city, the library and the forest that I have experienced so far. It appears different types of the goo have mutated into different forms based on where they are. Just then I hear a massive roar and the entire building shakes. The previously covered windows are abruptly cleared, letting the sunlight in. I run outside to see the slime from the entire city shifting and pooling like quicksilver into the central square.
(A five colour spell with unique text and a land that does something rare)
Genetic Culmination2WUBRG
Legendary Creature - Ooze (M)
Protection from all colours.
Genetic Culmination's power and toughness are both equal to the total power of all creature cards in all graveyards.
As long as Genetic Culmination is on the battlefield, it has all activated abilities of all creature cards in all graveyards.
*/*
Vitriona's Laboratory
Legendary Land (M)
Vitriona's Laboratory enters the battlefield tapped.
T: Add 1 to your mana pool.
T: Put a charge counter on Vitriona's Laboratory, then if it has three or more charge counters on it sacrifice it. If you do, destroy all nonland permanents. They can't be regenerated. Activate this ability only as a sorcery.
Seeing the entire landscape shift into one gigantic being sends a jolt of fear through my body. The amalgam of every piece of rotten slime seems to be totally unstoppable to me alone. This reminds me of the time I had to stare Emrakul, the dreaded Eldrazi square in the face and decided on the fate of an entire plane. I swore that I would never leave a plane to be destroyed like that again, even if I had to put my own life at stake. I run into the lab again and after scrabbling through every last desk draw and filing cabinet in the place I find a set of keys that lead me to a sealed off basement. Underneath the lab is an array of generators, power conduits and hydraulic systems that have been protected from the various escaped experiments and still appear to be working. The plan to overload the equipment and cause an explosion that would rip the plane in half, destroying the horrific monster goes off, but I can't tell if it works because I have to planeswalk away from this horrible place. Using every last shred of my energy in the explosion I only have enough left to strain through the blind eternities and end up anywhere else. Not even enough energy to guide myself to a known place, it will be a while before I can report back to the consortium...
Not much longer to vote, and we have a tie at the moment.
I think ced got the coolest prompt, but he did it justice with strong cards. The mirrored knights are cool. Wings of the Fiend is interesting, although I'm not sure if it would play well. Fish in a Barrel is creative removal and could be a combo piece. The Goldmine is great, but the Steed seems like a pretty safe 5-color design instead of trying for something new.
PenguinTod, I'm not sure why the mirrored pair uses -X/-X instead of just redirecting damage, but it's a cool mirror. Something feels off about Arcanum Pistol, maybe could be interesting with more tweaks, like getting a variable amount of counters or being able to spend more than one counter at a time. Giant's Frenzy is ok. I'm not sure what City Hall is trying to do, or why the Power Core should be colored.
Big_Cal, Personal Shield seems awfully good compared to Divine Verdict, but I guess it does require you to have a guy. I was really hoping to see a mechanic that allowed creatures to stick together, the graveyard route isn't bad but it's a well-worn path. I think the land is too good, it's a Planar Cleansing with Suspend 3 for free, or mana if you need it. Nice flavor output though.
MDenham will break the tie if necessary. I did actually vote for ced pretty early on (in case you weren't aware, you can click the names in a public poll to see who voted for whom). All of you had some good ideas though!
Okay, here I am, five minutes late. Let's break this tie. (As a result, I won't bother with a critique of PenguinTod's cards.)
ced395: Fish in a Barrel is kind ofreally awkward. I'm not sure there's actually a good wording for the effect you want (the closest I can come up with is "Tap an untapped creature you control: That creature deals 2 damage to enchanted creature.", which isn't quite the same as it lets you use creatures that entered the battlefield this turn as well). Shadow Gunslinger has the same issue with awkward wording, this time in the service of... well... I'm not sure what. I think I'd rather just see it as "Whenever ~ deals combat damage to a player, that player may pay 2. If that player doesn't, he or she can't cast spells during his or her next turn." It's functionally different in multiplayer, but it's more readable.
The rest of the cards are decent, though I think Haber's Goldmine might be slightly underpowered. It'd require playtesting, obviously.
Big_Cal: Slime-Soled Boots should word its second ability "As long as..." rather than "If". Genetic Culmination... oh boy. I'm not quite sure what happens if there's one of it in the graveyard. (I believe the power and toughness of the one in the graveyard would be equal to twice the total power of creature cards below it, plus the total power of creature cards above it, based on an assumption that the order of cards in your graveyard can be substituted for timestamp ordering. It may be twice the total power of all creature cards in your graveyard, or it may be infinite instead.)
Also, you destroyed the plane. On the plus side, I like the rest of your cards better than the rest of ced's.
I'm going to have to award the win to...
We are highly disappointed in your decision to destroy the plane of Tewuru. However, based on your report, it becomes painfully obvious that this was the only choice to avoid another Eldrazi-class event so soon on the heels of what happened on Zendikar.
You have our grudging support for your promotion to a less problematic desk job, Big_Cal.
Signed,
Board of Directors, Infinite Consortium
and Nicol Bolas
As for Genetic Culmination, since they're both power and toughness setting effects they'll be redundant in multiples
Maybe I explained it badly.
Let's say you've got one on the battlefield, and one in the graveyard, along with Progenitus in the 'yard. If you didn't have the second one in the graveyard, this would be simple - the one on the battlefield is a 10/10, since Progenitus is the only thing for it to work from.
The power and toughness of the one in the graveyard is where things get problematic, because characteristic-defining effects (like P/T-determination effects, for example) work in all zones. Looking at the rules (specifically, CR613.6 and 613.7), it looks like the correct answer is "its power and toughness are equal to twice the sum of the powers of everything below it in your graveyard, plus the sum of the powers of everything above it in your graveyard", or possibly just "its power and toughness are equal to the sum of the powers of everything except Genetic Culmination in your graveyard".
I'm honestly not sure which of those is correct, but the root of the problem is that in the graveyard, it tries to count its own power as part of its power and toughness.
So in the situation with one in the graveyard, you have either a 20/20 in the 'yard and therefore a 30/30 on the battlefield, or a 10/10 in the 'yard and therefore a 20/20 on the battlefield.
Adventures in SegoviaThis is not a stable time loop.
What a mess. You finally get your reports in, and you can sense them being put into a file without even being read. The only response? "We've got some new locations for you to look at."
Sighing, you each make your way to a new plane, to produce more paperwork that undoubtedly won't be looked at, either...
FINAL CHALLENGE: Repeat the Rounds 1-3 challenges for a set based on the prompt in the spoiler below. Round 1 - mirrored pair of creatures; Round 2 - instant/sorcery + enchantment/artifact, one is removal and the other helps combat performance; Round 3 - an odd land and a five-color spell
The poll will close shortly after 2pm Pacific, Thursday, November 8th. May the best evaluator win!
Our final three is:
(Probably NSFW) So you may have heard I'm trying to write a TV series...
I'll try to get comments up at some point too.
I think ced got the coolest prompt, but he did it justice with strong cards. The mirrored knights are cool. Wings of the Fiend is interesting, although I'm not sure if it would play well. Fish in a Barrel is creative removal and could be a combo piece. The Goldmine is great, but the Steed seems like a pretty safe 5-color design instead of trying for something new.
PenguinTod, I'm not sure why the mirrored pair uses -X/-X instead of just redirecting damage, but it's a cool mirror. Something feels off about Arcanum Pistol, maybe could be interesting with more tweaks, like getting a variable amount of counters or being able to spend more than one counter at a time. Giant's Frenzy is ok. I'm not sure what City Hall is trying to do, or why the Power Core should be colored.
Big_Cal, Personal Shield seems awfully good compared to Divine Verdict, but I guess it does require you to have a guy. I was really hoping to see a mechanic that allowed creatures to stick together, the graveyard route isn't bad but it's a well-worn path. I think the land is too good, it's a Planar Cleansing with Suspend 3 for free, or mana if you need it. Nice flavor output though.
ced395: Fish in a Barrel is
kind ofreally awkward. I'm not sure there's actually a good wording for the effect you want (the closest I can come up with is "Tap an untapped creature you control: That creature deals 2 damage to enchanted creature.", which isn't quite the same as it lets you use creatures that entered the battlefield this turn as well). Shadow Gunslinger has the same issue with awkward wording, this time in the service of... well... I'm not sure what. I think I'd rather just see it as "Whenever ~ deals combat damage to a player, that player may pay 2. If that player doesn't, he or she can't cast spells during his or her next turn." It's functionally different in multiplayer, but it's more readable.The rest of the cards are decent, though I think Haber's Goldmine might be slightly underpowered. It'd require playtesting, obviously.
Big_Cal: Slime-Soled Boots should word its second ability "As long as..." rather than "If". Genetic Culmination... oh boy. I'm not quite sure what happens if there's one of it in the graveyard. (I believe the power and toughness of the one in the graveyard would be equal to twice the total power of creature cards below it, plus the total power of creature cards above it, based on an assumption that the order of cards in your graveyard can be substituted for timestamp ordering. It may be twice the total power of all creature cards in your graveyard, or it may be infinite instead.)
Also, you destroyed the plane.
I'm going to have to award the win to...
You have our grudging support for your promotion to a less problematic desk job, Big_Cal.
Signed,
Board of Directors, Infinite Consortium
and Nicol Bolas
(Probably NSFW) So you may have heard I'm trying to write a TV series...
Let's say you've got one on the battlefield, and one in the graveyard, along with Progenitus in the 'yard. If you didn't have the second one in the graveyard, this would be simple - the one on the battlefield is a 10/10, since Progenitus is the only thing for it to work from.
The power and toughness of the one in the graveyard is where things get problematic, because characteristic-defining effects (like P/T-determination effects, for example) work in all zones. Looking at the rules (specifically, CR613.6 and 613.7), it looks like the correct answer is "its power and toughness are equal to twice the sum of the powers of everything below it in your graveyard, plus the sum of the powers of everything above it in your graveyard", or possibly just "its power and toughness are equal to the sum of the powers of everything except Genetic Culmination in your graveyard".
I'm honestly not sure which of those is correct, but the root of the problem is that in the graveyard, it tries to count its own power as part of its power and toughness.
So in the situation with one in the graveyard, you have either a 20/20 in the 'yard and therefore a 30/30 on the battlefield, or a 10/10 in the 'yard and therefore a 20/20 on the battlefield.
(Probably NSFW) So you may have heard I'm trying to write a TV series...