The world doesn't revolve around me but the threads have been going up at pretty early lately and not just since indie has returned. Today's went up ~7:20PM for me on May 3rd. That's still internet prime time. I doubt we're missing out on anyone but it's an observation I thought was worthing sharing positive vibes
Fgurative: The going rate for vanilla land-destruction is 2R, but there's usually an upside that bumps the cost to CMC4. In this case, it's a downside, and has a much more prohibitive cost. The second choice is a far better value, and is actually undercosted. If choice #1 was "Destroy target land", and the mana cost was 2RR, I'd be totally behind this card. Ruggley: I'd totally play this card, but don't the 2 halves of fuse cards typically synergize with each other somehow? It's kind of a flavor fail, though I like the card otherwise. (But what's the rarity?) BlackTempleGuardian: Lol, Prodigal Ballista. Great concept, but 5 mana for a double-pinger that can hit players with no downsides is too good. Also, what's the rarity? netn10: Like an Orzhov From Beyond. I can dig it. Recurring it for less than its CMC might be a bit too good, and the ability cost being just black might make the whiteness of the mana cost irrelevant. Still, it goes in any white or black limited deck fairly well. ...OK, I talked myself into it. Tim1137: Know what every Vintage deck needs? 5 chances for a turn-1 Black Lotus. *softly cries* IlGreven: Pretty nifty. At worst, it eats cheap removal or forces a couple of awkward blocks, and gets better from there. You didn't specify rarity, though. I'd like it better as a 2/3 with first strike at uncommon. Like an Anaba Bodyguard with an upside. Groovelord: Idunno, man... I see this getting out of hand REALLY quickly. If it's any good at all, it'll be broken all to hell. Even the turn you play it, you get a free lightning bolt during combat. Immediate and incremental value on the same card is scary. entombedhydra: The templating of Cobble is clunky as all hell, but I do like the mechanic. CMC6 for a 4/4 with evasion and 2 upsides that synergize with each other is maybe too good for uncommon. But I like the card a lot anyway. atogstorm: The only other 2CMC "exile target creature" spell at instant is Reality Shift, and it immediately gives the opponent a replacement creature that they might be able to upgrade later. I'm thinking a clue token isn't a comparable condolence gift. However... omg flavor win. Ebontail: This could take over games really, really quickly. I think it should be a tad bit easier to kill in combat, or maybe it makes 2/2 wolves instead of copies, or maybe it's a regular death trigger. Idunno, it just seems busted as-is. Indighost: Ooh. Star Wars flavor on a simple, good card. I'm on-board. Good rarity, too. I like this at uncommon.
Sorry for the awful planeswalker yesterday. Contests just aren't fun for me unless I take it less seriously every so often.
Does anyone else find it hard to vote for cards that would never get made for a technical reasons? Like a color that is doing something it doesnt do in the actual game?
Im looking at you, people exiling creatures in black. Black occasionally exiles cards from hand, counter and even tokens on rare occasion, but the one thing it doesnt do is exile creatures for removal, at least not as any kind of normal thing. Its a philosophical thing, black is all about death. Ive seen a couple of great cards the past few days that woulda had my vote id they just destroyed a creature rather than exiling it, or if it had incorporated white mana in the cost.
Another question, what do you guys use to determine your votes?
I first ask myself is this technically doable (ie color pie infractions, rules conflicts, etc. then i ask myself is it formated correctly or at least in a manner thats grokable if its a unique case. Then i look at power level, which generally speaking everyone seems to have a good grasp on, havet seem a OP fanboy card yet, but if someone is selling me a 55 angel with keywords and no drawbacks for 4 mana im gonna pass. And lastly i aks my self, "Would i play this?" Bonus points for clean and elegant design.
Essentially i eliminate anything i think wouldnt get made for technical reasons and then i screen out the OP stuff and then i pick my favorite of whats left, and i favor clean design. Not to say i wouldnt vote for a wordy card but the cards i think are the best, are the ones that make me say, "wait, they didnt make this already? I have to check gatherer... Huh, no $#!t."
design is usually more important to me than development, so i tend to give cards that are poorly costed or weirdly worded a pass if the idea they're going for is interesting enough
For voting, I typically work off of a bar system. There's a nebulous standard in my head for what a printable card looks like, and only the cards that meet it are considered for the top 2. I take the few that do, and compare their originality, efficiency, and balance, with flavor as a tie-breaker.
The surest way to get my eyes rolling at a card is bad or ambiguous grammar, most often in the name of the card. A thesaurus can be a great tool, but you should still only use words and sentence structures that you understand. Also, I dabbled in card design in High School. Anything that resembles anything I made back then is an automatic no. There's a balance to be struck between boring design and juvenile design. A lot of the time, people seem to be way overshooting "novel" into "ridiculous" territory. Dumb flavor text is a pet peeve of mine, too, but I try not to be biased by that. My motto is, if I can't think of the perfect way to season the card with flavor text within the first 30 seconds or so, maybe it doesn't need any.
the one time i dont post an explanation of the card...
Faithful Geyser
Land (R)
t: Add two mana of any color to your mana pool. Return Faithful Geyser to your hand.
Why this doesnt ETB tapped.
untapped you get: if you play:
turn 1 - 2 mana (Geyser)
turn 2 - 2 mana (Geyser)
turn 3 - 2 mana (Geyser)
turn 4 - 2 mana (Geyser)
turn 5 - 2 mana (Geyser)
turn 6 - 2 mana (Geyser)
ETB untapped w/ basic lands
turn 1 - 2 mana (Geyser)
turn 2 - 1 mana (basic)
turn 3 - 3 mana (Geyser)
turn 4 - 2 mana (basic)
turn 5 - 4 mana (Geyser)
turn 6 - 3 mana (basic)
ETB tapped w/ another geyser
turn 1 - 0 mana (Geyser1)
turn 2 - 2 mana (Geyser2)
turn 3 - 2 mana (Geyser1)
turn 4 - 2 mana (Geyser2)
turn 5 - 2 mana (Geyser1)
turn 6 - 2 mana (Geyser2)
ETB tapped w/ basic lands
turn 1 - 0 mana (Geyser)
turn 2 - 3 mana (basic)
turn 3 - 1 mana (Geyser)
turn 4 - 4 mana (basic)
turn 5 - 2 mana (Geyser)
turn 6 - 5 mana (basic)
This 2 mana source is NOT Sol Ring. Sol ring is deadly cus it is 2 mana every turn, get it out early enuf and you get a huge mana advantage over the course if a game.
Yes this will give you 2 mana turn one but it dooms you to basicslly 2 mana from your land untik you decuse to stop playing it.
ETB tapped only amounts to the difference of the 2 mana from turn one if alternated with another geyser.
When alternated with a basic land
ETB tapped amounts to the same amount of mana overall, just distributed differently. Yes you can get 2 mana turn 1 but youll only get 1 mana turn 2.
2 mana turn one is nice, but thats only one more than youd have if you played a basic. Whats more its not persistent, 2 mana turn 1 does not equate to 3 or 4 mana turn 2, 4 to 6 man on turn 3 etc.
ETB tapped when played with a single mana producing land actually begins to give you access to more mana, starting turn 4, than if you used the Geyser every turn.
Returning it to your hand is actually a nasty penalty for a land. Remember you usually only only play one per turn so this csrd csn trap you into destroying your own tempo.
If it ETB tapped i think it would actually have to tap for 3 mana. I think you might be able to do ETB untapped and tap for 3 colorless mana if the environment was designed to not have overly powerful 3 drop artifacts.
Insane Slaughterbully1BR
Creature - Minotaur Warrior
Lifelink, menace
At the beginning of your upkeep, Insane Slaughterbully deals 2 damage to each creature you control.
2/3
It lifelinks from all your creatures and from itself. Effeftively 2/1 menace.
Private Mod Note
():
Rollback Post to RevisionRollBack
MtG is where you can hate white players or black players, and still not be racist.
Force of Anger
Instant (MR)
You may pay 1 life and exile a red card from your hand rather than pay Force of Anger's mana cost.
Force of Anger deals 4 damage to target creature or player.
OppressWWUU
Instant (M)
When you cast Oppress, if it isn't on the stack, take an extra turn after this one.
Choose one:
— Your opponents can't cast spells or activate abilities this turn.
— your opponents can't attack you or planeswalkers you control this turn.
Draw a card.
If it's countered, you'll take an extra turn instead of hosing your opponents. The draw effect is not one of the choices. You'll draw regardless of your choice.
I love the idea of a card that gives you a different effect if it is countered; unfortunately, as written, the triggered ability will never go off for a couple of reasons. Due to it being an intervening "if" clause, it checks the "if" when it would trigger to see if it should trigger at all and since the moment you cast a spell it MUST be on the stack as part of casting that spell, it will never see itself as off the stack when the ability is trying to trigger. Additionally, all your opponent would have to do to keep you from gaining the extra turn while also countering the spell would be to let the trigger (assuming it somehow happened in the first place) resolve, and then counter the spell; this is because on cast triggers will always go on the stack after the spell it came from and as such will always resolve first.
So, I would propose a solution: simply change the trigger condition to check for when the spell is countered by another spell or ability (or just countered at all if you want to include fizzling due to the game rules). Overall I really like the idea behind it and would love to see more cards with that "mechanic" as that would soften the impact of counterspells. One thing to keep in mind is that the "countered" effect must be weaker than the normal effect, otherwise your opponent would be incentivized to simply not counter it to keep you from getting a stronger effect (barring specific situations where letting you get the original effect would somehow be worse than a stronger but different effect).
Nicaetinismo: Yes, I pinched that one off in a hurry, realized what a trainwreck it was, and replaced it soon after. I might rework the concept for future designs, but this was clearly hilariously bad implementation.
War Preparations2RW
Enchantment (R)
Each nonland card in your hand has "Cycling 2". (2, discard that card: Draw a card.)
Sacrifice War Preparations: Creatures you control get +2/+0 and gain first strike and haste until end of turn. "There is never only one good attack plan."
—Kenjek, captain of the Thousand Swords
Card by Stoner
How good is the effect of giving cards in your hand Cycling 2?
How good is the effect of giving cards in your hand Cycling 2?
It's Compulsion++ because cycling triggers and easier cost, and also Fluctuator makes the wombo combo and basically gives you your winning hand. I'd say this is a solid rare and well worth four mana.
Internal InconsistencyUB
Enchantment - Aura (R)
Enchant player
Enchanted player cannot cast two spells in a row that do not share a color, unless he or she pays 2 and 3 life. (As an additional cost to cast a spell)
Crazy fun concept. I just want to make a stab an alternate wording, since "in a row" isn't currently supported in the rules.
"Enchanted player can't cast a spell that doesn't share a color with the last spell that player cast, unless he or she pays 2 and 3 life as additional costs to cast it."
To be clear, I had no doubts about its power or anything (because I'm not the guy that knows that stuff yet lol). I did, however, want to know how good it was because, shhh don't tell Stoner but, I want to design some cards around it and I wanted to know if it was going to be too good before I whipped up some first drafts I've been thinking about the design space around Cycling recently and really enjoyed your card Thanks for responding Stone
Adapative Planning1U
Enchantment (R)
Noncreature spells you control can't be countered by spells or abilities.
Whenever a noncreature spell you control is countered by fizzling, return it to its owner's hand intsead of putting it into its owner's graveyard. "Wait! So the Ur-Dragon isn't some god-like progenitor of all dragon-kind? This is very upsetting. No matter, a quick name change and my fanfiction shall remain canon compliant! Muhahaha!"
Y'know... I've shied away from this design space, but actually, the world is ready for "fizzle" to be a game term. The reminder text for the first couple of sets afterwards could be, "A spell or ability fizzles if it is countered by the game rules instead of resolving" (or something like that). That way, this card's text could just read, "Whenever a noncreature spell you control fizzles..."
Perfect then no biggie. It's not hampering me in any way anyway
Ruggley: I'd totally play this card, but don't the 2 halves of fuse cards typically synergize with each other somehow? It's kind of a flavor fail, though I like the card otherwise. (But what's the rarity?)
BlackTempleGuardian: Lol, Prodigal Ballista. Great concept, but 5 mana for a double-pinger that can hit players with no downsides is too good. Also, what's the rarity?
netn10: Like an Orzhov From Beyond. I can dig it. Recurring it for less than its CMC might be a bit too good, and the ability cost being just black might make the whiteness of the mana cost irrelevant. Still, it goes in any white or black limited deck fairly well. ...OK, I talked myself into it.
Tim1137: Know what every Vintage deck needs? 5 chances for a turn-1 Black Lotus. *softly cries*
IlGreven: Pretty nifty. At worst, it eats cheap removal or forces a couple of awkward blocks, and gets better from there. You didn't specify rarity, though. I'd like it better as a 2/3 with first strike at uncommon. Like an Anaba Bodyguard with an upside.
Groovelord: Idunno, man... I see this getting out of hand REALLY quickly. If it's any good at all, it'll be broken all to hell. Even the turn you play it, you get a free lightning bolt during combat. Immediate and incremental value on the same card is scary.
entombedhydra: The templating of Cobble is clunky as all hell, but I do like the mechanic. CMC6 for a 4/4 with evasion and 2 upsides that synergize with each other is maybe too good for uncommon. But I like the card a lot anyway.
atogstorm: The only other 2CMC "exile target creature" spell at instant is Reality Shift, and it immediately gives the opponent a replacement creature that they might be able to upgrade later. I'm thinking a clue token isn't a comparable condolence gift. However... omg flavor win.
Ebontail: This could take over games really, really quickly. I think it should be a tad bit easier to kill in combat, or maybe it makes 2/2 wolves instead of copies, or maybe it's a regular death trigger. Idunno, it just seems busted as-is.
Indighost: Ooh. Star Wars flavor on a simple, good card. I'm on-board. Good rarity, too. I like this at uncommon.
Sorry for the awful planeswalker yesterday. Contests just aren't fun for me unless I take it less seriously every so often.
Nope.
My one hint is that I might be playing another game on this forum in DCC during this month.
Im looking at you, people exiling creatures in black. Black occasionally exiles cards from hand, counter and even tokens on rare occasion, but the one thing it doesnt do is exile creatures for removal, at least not as any kind of normal thing. Its a philosophical thing, black is all about death. Ive seen a couple of great cards the past few days that woulda had my vote id they just destroyed a creature rather than exiling it, or if it had incorporated white mana in the cost.
I first ask myself is this technically doable (ie color pie infractions, rules conflicts, etc. then i ask myself is it formated correctly or at least in a manner thats grokable if its a unique case. Then i look at power level, which generally speaking everyone seems to have a good grasp on, havet seem a OP fanboy card yet, but if someone is selling me a 55 angel with keywords and no drawbacks for 4 mana im gonna pass. And lastly i aks my self, "Would i play this?" Bonus points for clean and elegant design.
Essentially i eliminate anything i think wouldnt get made for technical reasons and then i screen out the OP stuff and then i pick my favorite of whats left, and i favor clean design. Not to say i wouldnt vote for a wordy card but the cards i think are the best, are the ones that make me say, "wait, they didnt make this already? I have to check gatherer... Huh, no $#!t."
The surest way to get my eyes rolling at a card is bad or ambiguous grammar, most often in the name of the card. A thesaurus can be a great tool, but you should still only use words and sentence structures that you understand. Also, I dabbled in card design in High School. Anything that resembles anything I made back then is an automatic no. There's a balance to be struck between boring design and juvenile design. A lot of the time, people seem to be way overshooting "novel" into "ridiculous" territory. Dumb flavor text is a pet peeve of mine, too, but I try not to be biased by that. My motto is, if I can't think of the perfect way to season the card with flavor text within the first 30 seconds or so, maybe it doesn't need any.
Also Helpthys the white legend got a different name in the effects. That was not the reason I did not vote for it though.
Faithful Geyser
Land (R)
t: Add two mana of any color to your mana pool. Return Faithful Geyser to your hand.
Why this doesnt ETB tapped.
untapped you get: if you play:
turn 1 - 2 mana (Geyser)
turn 2 - 2 mana (Geyser)
turn 3 - 2 mana (Geyser)
turn 4 - 2 mana (Geyser)
turn 5 - 2 mana (Geyser)
turn 6 - 2 mana (Geyser)
ETB untapped w/ basic lands
turn 1 - 2 mana (Geyser)
turn 2 - 1 mana (basic)
turn 3 - 3 mana (Geyser)
turn 4 - 2 mana (basic)
turn 5 - 4 mana (Geyser)
turn 6 - 3 mana (basic)
ETB tapped w/ another geyser
turn 1 - 0 mana (Geyser1)
turn 2 - 2 mana (Geyser2)
turn 3 - 2 mana (Geyser1)
turn 4 - 2 mana (Geyser2)
turn 5 - 2 mana (Geyser1)
turn 6 - 2 mana (Geyser2)
ETB tapped w/ basic lands
turn 1 - 0 mana (Geyser)
turn 2 - 3 mana (basic)
turn 3 - 1 mana (Geyser)
turn 4 - 4 mana (basic)
turn 5 - 2 mana (Geyser)
turn 6 - 5 mana (basic)
This 2 mana source is NOT Sol Ring. Sol ring is deadly cus it is 2 mana every turn, get it out early enuf and you get a huge mana advantage over the course if a game.
Yes this will give you 2 mana turn one but it dooms you to basicslly 2 mana from your land untik you decuse to stop playing it.
ETB tapped only amounts to the difference of the 2 mana from turn one if alternated with another geyser.
When alternated with a basic land
ETB tapped amounts to the same amount of mana overall, just distributed differently. Yes you can get 2 mana turn 1 but youll only get 1 mana turn 2.
2 mana turn one is nice, but thats only one more than youd have if you played a basic. Whats more its not persistent, 2 mana turn 1 does not equate to 3 or 4 mana turn 2, 4 to 6 man on turn 3 etc.
ETB tapped when played with a single mana producing land actually begins to give you access to more mana, starting turn 4, than if you used the Geyser every turn.
Returning it to your hand is actually a nasty penalty for a land. Remember you usually only only play one per turn so this csrd csn trap you into destroying your own tempo.
If it ETB tapped i think it would actually have to tap for 3 mana. I think you might be able to do ETB untapped and tap for 3 colorless mana if the environment was designed to not have overly powerful 3 drop artifacts.
Turn 1 : geyser, pass
Turn 2 : Use Geyser, Play Geyser (again) 4 Mana.
Thats helluva strong on not green decks.
Insane Slaughterbully 1BR
Creature - Minotaur Warrior
Lifelink, menace
At the beginning of your upkeep, Insane Slaughterbully deals 2 damage to each creature you control.
2/3
It lifelinks from all your creatures and from itself. Effeftively 2/1 menace.
Uh?
I̟̥͍̠ͅn̩͉̣͍̬͚ͅ ̬̬͖t̯̹̞̺͖͓̯̤h̘͍̬e͙̯͈̖̼̮ ̭̬f̺̲̲̪i͙͉̟̩̰r̪̝͚͈̝̥͍̝̲s̼̻͇̘̳͔ͅt̲̺̳̗̜̪̙ ̳̺̥̻͚̗ͅm̜̜̟̰͈͓͎͇o̝̖̮̝͇m̯̻̞̼̫̗͓̤e̩̯̬̮̩n͎̱̪̲̹͖t͇̖s̰̮ͅ,̤̲͙̻̭̻̯̹̰ ̖t̫̙̺̯͖͚̯ͅh͙̯̦̳̗̰̟e͖̪͉̼̯ ̪͕g̞̣͔a̗̦t̬̬͓͙̫̖̭̻e̩̻̯ ̜̖̦̖̤̭͙̬t̞̹̥̪͎͉ͅo͕͚͍͇̲͇͓̺ ̭̬͙͈̣̻t͈͍͙͓̫̖͙̩h̪̬̖̙e̗͈ ̗̬̟̞̺̤͉̯ͅa̦̯͚̙̜̮f͉͙̲̣̞̼t̪̤̞̣͚e̲͉̳̥r͇̪̙͚͓l̥̞̞͎̹̯̹ͅi͓̬f̮̥̬̞͈ͅe͎ ̟̩̤̳̠̯̩̯o̮̘̲p̟͚̣̞͉͓e͍̩̣n͔̼͕͚̜e̬̱d̼̘͎̖̹͍̮̠,͖̺̭̱̮ ̣̲͖̬̪̭̥a̪͚n̟̲̝̤̤̞̗d̘̱̗͇̮͕̳͕͔ ͖̞͉͎t̹̙͎h̰̱͉̗e̪̞̱̝̹̩ͅ ̠̱̩̭̦p̯̙e͓o̳͚̰̯̺̱̰͔̘p̬͎̱̣̼̩͇l̗̟̖͚̠e̱͉͔̱̦̬̟̙ ̖͚̪͔̼̦w̺̖̤̱e͖̗̻̦͓̖̘̜r̭̥e͔̹̫̱͕̦̰͕ ̗͔̠p̠̗͍͍̱̳̠r̰͔͎̰o͉̥͓̰͚̥s̟͚̹̱͔̣t͉̙̳̖͖̪̮r̥̘̥͙̹a͉̟̫̟̳̠̟̭t͈̜̰͈͎e̞̣̭̲̬ ͚̗̯̟͙i͍͖̰̘̦͖͉ṇ̮̻̯̦̲̩͍ ̦̮͚̫̤t͉͖̫͕ͅͅh͙̮̻̘̣̮̼e͕̺ ͙l͕̠͎̰̥i̲͓͉̲g̫̳̟͈͇̖h̠̦̖t͓̯͎̗ ̳̪̘̟̙̩̦o̫̲f̙͔̰̙̠ ̹̪̗͇̯t͖̼̼͉͖̬h̹͇̩e͚̖̺̤͉̹͕̪ ͚͓̭̝̺G͎̗̯̩o̫̯̮̟̮̳̘d̜̲͙̠-̩̳̯̲̗̜P̹̘̥͉̝h͍͈̗̖̝ͅa͍̗̮̼̗r̜̖͇̙̺a̭̺͔̞̳͈o̪̣͓̯̬͙̯̰̗h̖̦͈̥̯͔.͇̣̙̝
It could easily be a 2/1 with "deals 2 damage to each other creature you control." which would be easier to understand, but nix 2 life from you.
I love the idea of a card that gives you a different effect if it is countered; unfortunately, as written, the triggered ability will never go off for a couple of reasons. Due to it being an intervening "if" clause, it checks the "if" when it would trigger to see if it should trigger at all and since the moment you cast a spell it MUST be on the stack as part of casting that spell, it will never see itself as off the stack when the ability is trying to trigger. Additionally, all your opponent would have to do to keep you from gaining the extra turn while also countering the spell would be to let the trigger (assuming it somehow happened in the first place) resolve, and then counter the spell; this is because on cast triggers will always go on the stack after the spell it came from and as such will always resolve first.
So, I would propose a solution: simply change the trigger condition to check for when the spell is countered by another spell or ability (or just countered at all if you want to include fizzling due to the game rules). Overall I really like the idea behind it and would love to see more cards with that "mechanic" as that would soften the impact of counterspells. One thing to keep in mind is that the "countered" effect must be weaker than the normal effect, otherwise your opponent would be incentivized to simply not counter it to keep you from getting a stronger effect (barring specific situations where letting you get the original effect would somehow be worse than a stronger but different effect).
Enchantment (R)
Each nonland card in your hand has "Cycling 2". (2, discard that card: Draw a card.)
Sacrifice War Preparations: Creatures you control get +2/+0 and gain first strike and haste until end of turn.
"There is never only one good attack plan."
—Kenjek, captain of the Thousand Swords
Card by Stoner
How good is the effect of giving cards in your hand Cycling 2?
It's Compulsion++ because cycling triggers and easier cost, and also Fluctuator makes the wombo combo and basically gives you your winning hand. I'd say this is a solid rare and well worth four mana.
I̟̥͍̠ͅn̩͉̣͍̬͚ͅ ̬̬͖t̯̹̞̺͖͓̯̤h̘͍̬e͙̯͈̖̼̮ ̭̬f̺̲̲̪i͙͉̟̩̰r̪̝͚͈̝̥͍̝̲s̼̻͇̘̳͔ͅt̲̺̳̗̜̪̙ ̳̺̥̻͚̗ͅm̜̜̟̰͈͓͎͇o̝̖̮̝͇m̯̻̞̼̫̗͓̤e̩̯̬̮̩n͎̱̪̲̹͖t͇̖s̰̮ͅ,̤̲͙̻̭̻̯̹̰ ̖t̫̙̺̯͖͚̯ͅh͙̯̦̳̗̰̟e͖̪͉̼̯ ̪͕g̞̣͔a̗̦t̬̬͓͙̫̖̭̻e̩̻̯ ̜̖̦̖̤̭͙̬t̞̹̥̪͎͉ͅo͕͚͍͇̲͇͓̺ ̭̬͙͈̣̻t͈͍͙͓̫̖͙̩h̪̬̖̙e̗͈ ̗̬̟̞̺̤͉̯ͅa̦̯͚̙̜̮f͉͙̲̣̞̼t̪̤̞̣͚e̲͉̳̥r͇̪̙͚͓l̥̞̞͎̹̯̹ͅi͓̬f̮̥̬̞͈ͅe͎ ̟̩̤̳̠̯̩̯o̮̘̲p̟͚̣̞͉͓e͍̩̣n͔̼͕͚̜e̬̱d̼̘͎̖̹͍̮̠,͖̺̭̱̮ ̣̲͖̬̪̭̥a̪͚n̟̲̝̤̤̞̗d̘̱̗͇̮͕̳͕͔ ͖̞͉͎t̹̙͎h̰̱͉̗e̪̞̱̝̹̩ͅ ̠̱̩̭̦p̯̙e͓o̳͚̰̯̺̱̰͔̘p̬͎̱̣̼̩͇l̗̟̖͚̠e̱͉͔̱̦̬̟̙ ̖͚̪͔̼̦w̺̖̤̱e͖̗̻̦͓̖̘̜r̭̥e͔̹̫̱͕̦̰͕ ̗͔̠p̠̗͍͍̱̳̠r̰͔͎̰o͉̥͓̰͚̥s̟͚̹̱͔̣t͉̙̳̖͖̪̮r̥̘̥͙̹a͉̟̫̟̳̠̟̭t͈̜̰͈͎e̞̣̭̲̬ ͚̗̯̟͙i͍͖̰̘̦͖͉ṇ̮̻̯̦̲̩͍ ̦̮͚̫̤t͉͖̫͕ͅͅh͙̮̻̘̣̮̼e͕̺ ͙l͕̠͎̰̥i̲͓͉̲g̫̳̟͈͇̖h̠̦̖t͓̯͎̗ ̳̪̘̟̙̩̦o̫̲f̙͔̰̙̠ ̹̪̗͇̯t͖̼̼͉͖̬h̹͇̩e͚̖̺̤͉̹͕̪ ͚͓̭̝̺G͎̗̯̩o̫̯̮̟̮̳̘d̜̲͙̠-̩̳̯̲̗̜P̹̘̥͉̝h͍͈̗̖̝ͅa͍̗̮̼̗r̜̖͇̙̺a̭̺͔̞̳͈o̪̣͓̯̬͙̯̰̗h̖̦͈̥̯͔.͇̣̙̝
"Enchanted player can't cast a spell that doesn't share a color with the last spell that player cast, unless he or she pays 2 and 3 life as additional costs to cast it."
Y'know... I've shied away from this design space, but actually, the world is ready for "fizzle" to be a game term. The reminder text for the first couple of sets afterwards could be, "A spell or ability fizzles if it is countered by the game rules instead of resolving" (or something like that). That way, this card's text could just read, "Whenever a noncreature spell you control fizzles..."