Keep doing what you're doing daytripper, and girls will eventually catch on and shut you out. Instead of standing up and being true, you'll still be drinking, drugging, and diddling your way to the bottom. It may be loathsome to you to be gay, but for everyone else around you, it's much worse that you just use people to maintain the illusion that you're not. That's strictly worse than being a closeted gay. You're a veritable Countess Bathory desperately maintaining her illusion of youth and beauty by preying on innocent teenage girls. What if you catch something and spread it to another girl in your quest for self-pity?
Get help, sooner the better. Talk to a professional about your negative feelings. If you're gay and you know it, give yourself a hug and proceed with conviction and providence. I don't know or care what your objection to homosexuality is based on, but it can't be more important than the breach of ethics you're committing now.
My uncle just came out to all of us. and all he did was sat down with a few family members at a time and told each of us. he finally did this after 21 years. So i would say just sit down the people who would take it the easest and then tell the others, just think about the people that already know as backup but dont do it becasue you have to , do it be casue you want to! ... Opps didnt read all the posts , i see you have already. Your dad will be mad for a bit , just give it time, my poppy was mad at 1st but he came around.
I know exactly what you are going through. My mother and the rest of the family disowned me when I told them. I grew up in a very strict religious family. To the point if you did not go to church 3 times a week you were kicked out of the house. (Don’t know why they would have takin the good news as good and not bad lol)
Eventually my mother started coming around. I think a lot of it had to do with I was not begging to be taken back and let it be known if they cant except me for me I wanted no part of the family. Even though my mother and I were speaking. She still to her dieing day thought it was just a phase.
Long story short it sucks it really does, but water is sometimes thicker then blood.
Don’t walk on egg shells around your parents. If they are having a heard time that’s truly there problem not yours. If it’s a religious thing, maybe they need to 2nd guess this all loving religion they are following if having a son they love changes they way they look at them if they turn out to be gay.
Wow I find it so odd that people actually have negative reactions to people coming out. Then again my coming out was comedic so it went will with the family. Friends were a different story, some of them, took it really really badly, so I looked them in the eye and told them, "You will get over it, go insane or stop talking to me. Whichever you chose will be fine with me." So far I only lost 1 friend, well more like I misplaced him.
One friends by carried a pocket bible with him, those small ones that require a magnifying glass to read. He opened it with a creek, he used it that often. And started to preach unfortunately only one of us had actually read it and it wasn't him. He soooo lost that round.
The one person who took it wierdest is my homophobic older brother, he's working on that. Luckily since I go both ways, we can still exchange porn and that is the important thing.
How should I go about coming out? I have finally worked up the courage, and I want to do it, but I just can't for the life of me think of how. If anybody who has gone through this has any tips for me, they would be greatly appreciated. Thank you.
Discreetly ask people what they think of gays in general, make anonymous comments about a "friend" or a "friend of a friend", make sure other people are looking/watching/listening/hearing when talking about your opinions about it...then get your author or their publicist to out you at a book-reading.
Worked for Dumbledore.
Seriously...everything but the last part is what I'm doing now, and I'm in a loving heterosexual relationship that nevertheless people who know me publicly might find a bit odd.
EDIT: mikeyg - while I accept you have the power of life or death over me and I am not trying to do what you suggest, I think Jolon made a good point about a "social conservative" being unwelcome on many forums. He was an idiot, bigot and homophobe and should not have posted at all, but as someone of 66 I have less socially liberal views on things - mostly the existance of absolute right and wrong rather than infinite shades of grey - which might under some circumstances be assumed to be someone trolling. His comment about finding it hard to state an opposite point of view was valid and should have been allowed to have been debated. However let me put it on record that my private views on sex are MUCH MORE socially liberal than anyone who knows me merely through the public eye and Jolon's posts, while crass and bigoted, should have been respected and be taken issue with rather than ignored and chased away. Making him edit them for content and judgement rather than banning him just because he appeared to be disagreeing with most of the thread's opinions was what I would have done. Without an opposite opinion we are not able to debate and examine our own, and thus we become just as bigoted as Jolon was. - Mikey H.
OP - I hope whatever you do goes well. It is always difficult doing something that you know others will disapprove of, but as long as you do it tactfully and with respect to others' feelings and needs then I am sure they will come round. GOOD LUCK and may the force be with you. Don't be like the Tin Street Hooligan and knock people flat and break stuff...like Jolon did.
Michael Howard MP - former Conservative Leader and current Bird Wizard (:2mana::symu::symw: 3/3 Flying, Echo :symu::symw:, when M comes into play destroy target Fox, Cat or Rat)
Thank you to R&Doom for the amazing sig banner and Le_Gambit for the wonderful avatar.
"He took the balls from many clerks/And hung them from a branch "When he struck us with feet and hands/It made Volpone dance!" - The Ballad of Dentling Nick, by Mr Owl
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Get help, sooner the better. Talk to a professional about your negative feelings. If you're gay and you know it, give yourself a hug and proceed with conviction and providence. I don't know or care what your objection to homosexuality is based on, but it can't be more important than the breach of ethics you're committing now.
thanks to Zaphod and High~Light Studios
Eventually my mother started coming around. I think a lot of it had to do with I was not begging to be taken back and let it be known if they cant except me for me I wanted no part of the family. Even though my mother and I were speaking. She still to her dieing day thought it was just a phase.
Long story short it sucks it really does, but water is sometimes thicker then blood.
Don’t walk on egg shells around your parents. If they are having a heard time that’s truly there problem not yours. If it’s a religious thing, maybe they need to 2nd guess this all loving religion they are following if having a son they love changes they way they look at them if they turn out to be gay.
One friends by carried a pocket bible with him, those small ones that require a magnifying glass to read. He opened it with a creek, he used it that often. And started to preach unfortunately only one of us had actually read it and it wasn't him. He soooo lost that round.
The one person who took it wierdest is my homophobic older brother, he's working on that. Luckily since I go both ways, we can still exchange porn and that is the important thing.
Control is the ultimate expression of power.
Discreetly ask people what they think of gays in general, make anonymous comments about a "friend" or a "friend of a friend", make sure other people are looking/watching/listening/hearing when talking about your opinions about it...then get your author or their publicist to out you at a book-reading.
Worked for Dumbledore.
Seriously...everything but the last part is what I'm doing now, and I'm in a loving heterosexual relationship that nevertheless people who know me publicly might find a bit odd.
EDIT: mikeyg - while I accept you have the power of life or death over me and I am not trying to do what you suggest, I think Jolon made a good point about a "social conservative" being unwelcome on many forums. He was an idiot, bigot and homophobe and should not have posted at all, but as someone of 66 I have less socially liberal views on things - mostly the existance of absolute right and wrong rather than infinite shades of grey - which might under some circumstances be assumed to be someone trolling. His comment about finding it hard to state an opposite point of view was valid and should have been allowed to have been debated. However let me put it on record that my private views on sex are MUCH MORE socially liberal than anyone who knows me merely through the public eye and Jolon's posts, while crass and bigoted, should have been respected and be taken issue with rather than ignored and chased away. Making him edit them for content and judgement rather than banning him just because he appeared to be disagreeing with most of the thread's opinions was what I would have done. Without an opposite opinion we are not able to debate and examine our own, and thus we become just as bigoted as Jolon was. - Mikey H.
OP - I hope whatever you do goes well. It is always difficult doing something that you know others will disapprove of, but as long as you do it tactfully and with respect to others' feelings and needs then I am sure they will come round. GOOD LUCK and may the force be with you. Don't be like the Tin Street Hooligan and knock people flat and break stuff...like Jolon did.
Thank you to R&Doom for the amazing sig banner and Le_Gambit for the wonderful avatar.
"He took the balls from many clerks/And hung them from a branch
"When he struck us with feet and hands/It made Volpone dance!" - The Ballad of Dentling Nick, by Mr Owl