MTG Salvation

I wrote this sometime ago and wanted to share it with you guys. I just came across this thread and I think it is a wonderful idea! So here it goes, i hope you guys like it.

Can you honestly say that you have experienced true fear, true sadness, and true hatred? I’ve experienced it. I’ve seen it. I’ve lived it. With head in hands I ponder, and I weep, reminding myself of the things that I’ve done, things I’ve seen, and things that I’ve become. All of which are things I wish not to dwell on. But I must, it is reality, it is truth. What have you become? If you are reading this, I’m sure you are alive and remember when all of this started happening. You vaguely recall when normalcy began to wither away with time. It haunts me, as it probably does you, day in and day out, and has for nearly a year. Earlier in the year I had a support system, friends, loved ones, and people to tell me everything will be alright. I was a fool to believe that….but I did. Now I am sitting all alone in a condemned building with an empty clip in my gun and a dull knife on my hip trying to figure out what I did wrong, the Mindless wandering all around me. I wonder if I should have been a better father to my daughter Allison. I did all I could, if only I had left to get food at another time. I should have!!! If I would have then she would………. Welcome to my first thought every day. Just thinking about it makes me nauseous. Allison will never forgive me for that but she still accepted me because I kept her safe from the “stinkies”. That is what she called them, “stinkies”. She was only 5 when she was taken from me. Second thought; the woman I love. Her name was Sheryl. Sheryl was the woman I had an affair with for 3 months before my wife and I split up. I wonder if Kelly survived…..I really did still love her, I just loved Sheryl more. Sheryl was a strong woman, always willing to put up a fight no matter what came up. Kelly lacked that, kind of a push over. But she was the mother of my child…..oh, Allison…..not a day goes by that I don’t think about you. In the evenings when I rock myself to sleep to the haunting sounds of forever, I hold Truman tight against me and weep. He was all that was left of you when I came back that day. There was Truman and your mangled corpse. He only has one eye now and most of his stuffing has withered away, void of a soul, much like I am. But that isn’t what is important obviously, it’s because he reminds me of you. I’ve done this throughout the year, kept keepsakes of those I have met and lost and also those that I had loved and lost. Allison’s bear, Kelly’s charm bracelet, Jacob’s empty can of dip, just to name a few. I always did give him a hard time about doing that. I encourage you to do the same, Cherish those you are with. Hopefully you are with others and not static in a run-down building trying to convince the voices in your head that you did all that you could. I’m fighting those demons now. I have nothing else, no one else. Only those that dwell inside me that have coerced me into thinking that I failed and that they are the best I got, and I believe them……….I believe them. Third thought; those that understand me.