MTG Salvation

Yeah, another poem. And comment please, it's not that bad, right?



Surreal

A rush;
Of silent sirens and imagined bars
A pistol lickng the dewdrop of sweat
from the cashier's frightened eyes

A scream;
Of lunatic desperation for a reprieve
Frantically reaching for my heaven
A mere needle-point away

A trail;
Of smoke lost in starlit skies
Along with the remains of my life
A pact signed with tearstained joy

A bullet;
Silver in its unbearable intensity
Shot in my heart, bleeding black
Flowing into sewers of my soul

A dream;
Unable to wake, unable to die
A hurricane of rising insanity
Lost in my own deluded paranoia
Surviving only by the hearbeat
Felt in the hand holding mine.

I know nothing of and am terrible at poetry, so I usually do not comment on it, but I like this poem. It seems to flow together pretty well, and unlike other poems, it actually makes some sense! I can sort of tell what it's about. Unfortunately, I can offer no ways to improve it because I am terrible at poetry...

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Well, the poem is supposed to be about my life, and how it's all actually an illusion in my mind. Each stanza is supposed to portray a scene in my life. They go (in this order): A robbery, getting high, smoking, a break-up, and the last one's just to tie it together. I actually haven't experienced any of these things, but eh....