I welcome any and all comments, criticisms, praise, suggestions, etc. on this. Also, please LMK if you enjoy it and I will consider posting the first chapter.
----------------------------------------------------------------------- The Need for Nothing: Consolidation
Introduction
Fireworks erupted in the clear night sky of the war-ravaged capital. Men and women alike shielded their ears, but their eyes remained delighted at the wide spectrum of brilliant colors overhead. The children, meanwhile, stood motionless on the shattered sidewalks of the city; this was the most glorious celebration they had ever witnessed. A chorus of cheers rang out from the rooftops, providing a hearty background noise for the sirens of police cars and ambulances speeding through the residential district as a sign of triumph and jubilation. Armored vehicles with mounted machine guns paraded down the streets, bearing a newfound sense of confidence, the feeling that the resolve of the people to achieve victory in this struggle was growing, not diminishing. In the commercial district, a contagious wave of joy broke out among the storeowners and vendors. It was at once both an invigorating emotion and a stupefying one. So overcome where they with the mood of the moment that they dashed home to their wives and children with alarming haste, leaving their shops unattended. Everything was free for the taking. No one took anything.
The nation had won its first major battle in months, in a war that had seemed more and more like a stalemate with each passing second. The outcome of the battle was a signal to the world: success in this conflict was no longer seen as impossible; it was, instead, well within their grasp.
The President, congressmen and high ranking military and intelligence officials were being flown to the convention center to celebrate this accomplishment and to give praise to the one man in particular who made it all possible. The populace watched on intently, eager to witness the honoring of their hero of the day.
I like it, though it's really hard to judge it on what's posted.
I'd read it if more was put up, though.
Private Mod Note
():
Rollback Post to RevisionRollBack
Sing lustily and with good courage.
Be aware of singing as if you were half dead,
or half asleep:
but lift your voice with strength.
Be no more afraid of your voice now,
nor more ashamed of its being heard,
than when you sang the songs of Satan.
I must say I didn't get a good feel of the world. Is it contemporary, futuristic, historic? Hard to tell. I'd definitely read more though, and reserve my opinions till I do so.
Private Mod Note
():
Rollback Post to RevisionRollBack
To post a comment, please login or register a new account.
-----------------------------------------------------------------------
The Need for Nothing:
Consolidation
Introduction
Fireworks erupted in the clear night sky of the war-ravaged capital. Men and women alike shielded their ears, but their eyes remained delighted at the wide spectrum of brilliant colors overhead. The children, meanwhile, stood motionless on the shattered sidewalks of the city; this was the most glorious celebration they had ever witnessed. A chorus of cheers rang out from the rooftops, providing a hearty background noise for the sirens of police cars and ambulances speeding through the residential district as a sign of triumph and jubilation. Armored vehicles with mounted machine guns paraded down the streets, bearing a newfound sense of confidence, the feeling that the resolve of the people to achieve victory in this struggle was growing, not diminishing. In the commercial district, a contagious wave of joy broke out among the storeowners and vendors. It was at once both an invigorating emotion and a stupefying one. So overcome where they with the mood of the moment that they dashed home to their wives and children with alarming haste, leaving their shops unattended. Everything was free for the taking. No one took anything.
The nation had won its first major battle in months, in a war that had seemed more and more like a stalemate with each passing second. The outcome of the battle was a signal to the world: success in this conflict was no longer seen as impossible; it was, instead, well within their grasp.
The President, congressmen and high ranking military and intelligence officials were being flown to the convention center to celebrate this accomplishment and to give praise to the one man in particular who made it all possible. The populace watched on intently, eager to witness the honoring of their hero of the day.
I like it, though it's really hard to judge it on what's posted.
I'd read it if more was put up, though.
Be aware of singing as if you were half dead,
or half asleep:
but lift your voice with strength.
Be no more afraid of your voice now,
nor more ashamed of its being heard,
than when you sang the songs of Satan.