MTG Salvation

I came up with a fun deckbuilding game today and wanted to see if someone can create something more complicated than I did.

Welcome to the Primevals' Glorious Rebirth games!

The goal is simple: After casting Primevals' Glorious Rebirth, you must find the most convoluted way to win a game against 3 other players.

Note: Since killing with combat is easy (Godo, Bandit Warlord + Helm of the Host + Hammer of Nazahn), try to make it as complex as possible.

Rules:
1- Your entire deck is in the graveyard.
2- Your only cards in play are Norin the Wary, and enough lands to cast Primevals' Glorious Rebirth.
3- Your hand only contains Primevals'.
4- Standard Commander rules. (Banlist, Singleton)
5- Your commander is of no importance. (Since you have around 80 cards to play with.)

Bonus points if you manage to:
1- Kill enemies with different means.
2- Use Norin to win.

Example of a complex win:


Step 0) As the sorcery resolves, opponent cannot cast any spells (Teferi) and your creatures are protected from red sweeper on creatures (Akroma's Memorial)
Step 1) EtB effect on Titania returns Mirrorpool in play tapped. Helm of the Host attaches on Titania due to Hammer of Nazahn.
Step 2) Use Nissa, Koth and Garruk to produce mana. (Garruk specifically untapping Mirrorpool amongst his two lands.)
Step 3) Tap Feldon (Haste due to Hammer of Purphoros) to create your token #1 of Biovisionary.
Step 4) Use Saheeli Rai to make a token of Helm of the Host. This token attaches onto the Biovisionary.
Step 5) Pass to combat phase. Titania, Brudiclad and the Biovisionary trigger. Biovisionary #2, Brudiclad copies the Biovisionaries (#3) and Titania creates a copy (Recovering a Waste.) (I realized while writing that this Titania token could become #4 but let's keep going)
Step 6) Use the Amber, the remaining mana from the Planeswalkers and the Waste to tap Mirrorpool and create the token #4 with the token ability.
Step 7) Skip to End of Turn, you win.

Step 0) Dosan the Falling Leaf, to prevent spells from being cast to interact with you.
Step 1) Dralnu, Lich Lord with Anger in graveyard targeting Replenish.
Step 2) Teferi, Temporal Archmage targets 4 lands to cast Replenish.
Step 3) Replenish brings back Enchanted Evening, Opalescence, Parallax Wave, Nether Void, Purphoros, God of the Forge.
Step 4) Remove all opponent's permanents with Parallax Wave targeting them (as they are creatures). While the remove triggers are on the stack remove the Parallax Wave to it's own ability and all the targeted permanents will be permanently removed, except for the Parallax Wave, which you'll be able to use all over again.

All lands are removed, opponents can't use lands as they immediately die being 0/0 creatures with Enchanted Evening + Opalescence. Can't cast any spells because of Nether Void, so can't get any traction with Moxes, etc.

Step 5) Simply attack with Norin each turn to die via Purphoros.
You can of course just attack with your enchantment creatures, but I wanted bonus points.


If you wanted to go with more style points, then you could add Barren Glory and Fanatical Devotion as an enchantment to return with Replenish. Removing all your permanents, other than Barren Glory with Parallax Wave and Opalescence. You have to use the Fanatical Devotion to sacrifice the Parallax Wave while you have all your permanents set to be removed, this way the Parallax Wave will not come back into play.
You don't have cards in hand so at the beginning of next upkeep you win the game..yah.

[EDIT]
I realized that entire deck is in graveyard so won't get "turns" to attack with Norin. So it would have to be the Barren Glory -OR- going for maximum points...



Step 0) Dosan the Falling Leaf, to prevent spells from being cast to interact with you.

Step 1) Liliana, Death's Majesty return's Archaeomancer.

Step 2) Archaeomancer get's Open the Vaults.

Step 3) Teferi, Temporal Archmage untaps 4 lands.

Step 4) Use Aminatou, the Fateshifter to blink Teferi, Temporal Archmage to get more mana for casting Open the Vaults.

Step 5) Cast Open the Vaults returning Enchanted Evening, Opalescence, Parallax Wave, Nether Void, Isochron Scepter, Sol Ring.

Step 6) Remove all opponent's permanents with Parallax Wave targeting them (as they are creatures). While the remove triggers are on the stack remove the Parallax Wave to it's own ability and all the targeted permanents will be permanently removed, except for the Parallax Wave, which you'll be able to use all over again.

Step 7) Feldon's Cane to put your graveyard into your library to give you enough turns to...

Step 8) In your next turn, use Parallax Wave to actually blink Archaeomancer and get Trickbind from graveyard.

Step 9) Use Aminatou, the Fateshifter to blink the Isochron Scepter and exile Trickbind with it.

Step 10) Sol Ring pays for Isochron Scepter, cancelling the exile ability of Norin the Wary when he attacks, literally killing opponents with Norin, ahhh yeah.

Trickbind'ing Norin is so gangster. As for how to fix the "You will deck yourself next turn" problem, Memory's Journey or Krosan Reclamation are there to help.

Here is a new, even more crazy list, that kills every opponent (3) in a different way: Mill, Damage and Game Lost.



Passively: Akroma's Memorial gives Haste, Teferi protects all, Kongming gives +1/+1 to all our creatures.
Step 0) Enter the Battlefields: Sharuum brings Strionic Resonator into play, Gonti's Aether Heart gives way enough energy to be sac'ed. Titania grabs Crystal Quarry for fixing.
Step 1) Nissa untaps 4 lands, Teferi 4 more, tap Nykthos on blue devotion. (7 mana available +9 blue)
Step 2) Hanna targets Followed Footstep, then strionic resonator on Paradox Haze. (6 mana + 5 blue)
Step 3) Memory's Journey, returning unimportant card, Mind Grind, Time Sieve on the bottom of the empty library. (5 mana available + 5 blue)
Step 4) Play Paradox Haze on yourself, using the floating blue.
Step 5) Pass to combat (wasting 1 blue), attacking with Alesha, trigger on Clever Impersonator. Refuse to target with Clever Impersonator. It survives due to Kongming making it a 1/1.
Step 6) Second main phase, spend all 5 remaining mana on Followed Footsteps, targetting Clever Impersonator.
Step 7) Vivien Reid kills the Ugin's Nexus, giving you an extra turn. Pass to extra turn.
Step 8) Upkeeps, paradox haze gives us a second upkeep. Each upkeep, Clever Impersonator is copied, transforming into Paradox Haze on entry. (3 Paradox Hazes in play) Red Honden pings one player for 8. (4 Shrines in play)
Step 9) Using Garruk to untap Crystal Quarry and Nykthos a second time, pay WWUUBBRRGG for Door to Nothingness, killing one player. (2 left)
Step 10) Crack Gonti's Aether Heart for another extra turn.
Step 11) Upkeeps (4), same target, make 4 new Paradox Haze, dome the same player for 16 damage (24 total from the shrines).
Step 12) If you haven't drawn Time Sieve, use Teferi to grab it (first ability) then use Krosan Reclamation on random cards to avoid decking.
Step 13) Play Time Sieve, sac Breya, her two thopters, Sharuum and Strionic resonator to the Sieve, extra turn.
Step 14) Next turn, Upkeeps, create tokens of the Red Honden to deal a grand total of 64 damage to one player's face since the combo started.
Step 15) If the previous step didn't force you to kill two players, use all your Nykthos mana to Mind Grind the remaining player to dust (for around 60 lands.)

Congrats, you just wasted an hour of everyone's time, killed someone with damage, shown someone the door and ground a third person's mind to dust.

I would take advantage of the fact that Planeswalkers are now Legendary, creating all sorts of cool options for PW-based shenanigans.

I think the way to go so that you win with Norin the Wary is to create infinite Purphoros, God of the Forge copies. That way, when Norin comes back at end of turn, it will trigger all the Purph copies and kill everyone. Of course, it would just be easier to include Purphoros and 98 other Legendary creatures, but we are not going for easy here.

So to go for the more convoluted 'Rube Goldberg' approach, I think the best way to go is to have Mirror Gallery in play, and use Saheeli Rai to copy Purphoros. The issue then becomes needing to activate Saheeli multiple times, so we include The Chain Veil in the equation as well. We need to then be able to repeatedly activate The Chain Veil and have enough mana to activate it, so we include Garruk Wildspeaker and Nissa, Genesis Mage to untap 4 lands and a Ral Zarek to untap the Veil.

So the idea would be to -2 Saheeli, then +1 Saheeli over and over including Pir, Imaginative Rascal to speed up the process. This will also help out with the next problem of not wanting to kill them with Saheeli activations. I figure we can give our opponent a Urza's Armor, by including some sacrificial legendary artifacts that generate some mana like Mox Opal, Mox Amber, and Pyromancer's Goggles, then use the -2 on Daretti, Scrap Savant to weld in the Urza's Armor, then use the mana and Zedruu the Greathearted to donate it to the opponent.

Of course, we need to give all of your opponents an Urza's Armor, so we'll need to use the first few iterations of the Saheeli cycle to create plenty of copies of it, then we'll need to make sure we have enough mana to activate Zedruu multiple times to give them all away. So we could use Daretti similar to Shaeeli in a -2 then +2 (discarding nothing and drawing nothing) so that we can continue to weld stuff in and out (preferably things we can tap for colored mana each time like Gilded Lotus), or perhaps we just weld in Caged Sun to double up on our mana production through lands.



1) Cast Primeval's Glorious Rebirth, exiling Norin the Wary and putting Purphoros, God of the Forge, Saheeli Rai, The Chain Veil, Garruk Wildspeaker, Nissa, Genesis Mage, Ral Zarek, Pir, Imaginiative Rascal, Mox Opal, Mox Amber, Pyromancer's Goggles, Daretti, Scrap Savant, and Zedruu the Greathearted onto the battlefield. All the PW's would ETB with an additional Loyalty counter thanks to Pir and each opponent would take 2 damage thanks to Pir triggering Purph.

2) Use Daretti to weld out the Goggles to get Mirror Gallery into play. Garruk and Nissa to untap 4 lands, use the mana to activate Veil, then + Ral Zarek to untap Veil. We can +2 Saheeli while we're at it (damaging each opponent). We also start netting an additional 4 mana each loop.

3) Use the +2 (now +3 thanks to Pir) on Daretti to discard zero and draw zero. Garruk and Nissa to untap 4 lands, use the mana to activate Veil, then + Ral Zarek to untap Veil.

4) Use Daretti to weld out a Mox to get Caged Sun into play. Garruk and Nissa to untap 4 lands, use the mana to activate Veil, then + Ral Zarek to untap Veil.

5) Use Daretti again to weld out another Mox to get Urza's Armor into play, use Saheeli -2 to copy the Urza's Armor, use Garruk and Nissa to untap 4 lands, use the mana to activate Veil and Donate the copy via Zedruu to an opponent.

6) Use Garruk, Nissa, Ral Zarek, Veil loop to + Saheeli

7) Once every opponent has an Urza's Amor and we know that plussing Saheeli won't kill them, we start using the loop to make copies of Purphoros.

8) Once enough Purph copies are in play, we move to our end of turn step. Make sure that the Norin the Wary trigger goes on the stack last so that it resolves first, entering the battlefield to trigger all the Purphoros copies before they go away. GG.

Obviously, you pass up a ton of easier ways to kill the opponent along the way, but this is the way I would do it if I were trying to do something silly.