@ the_sid4: Chuck Norris. I don't know...I am not sure that sounds like a well-formed sentence. And it would sound weird using him as an adjective. "I ran away from the Chuck Norris squirrel."
If you get into that territory you run the risk of people saying "Boros Deck Wins is so Chuck Norris!"
Chuck Norris chuck norrised those unchuck norrises....Ok maybe not every word in the sentence but with a few round house kicks to the English Language, I'm sure Chuck could change that
Intersting conversation the over day let to this statement:
Them - "You can't go chuck norris on Chuck Norris! Chuck Norris would do twice as much chuck norris to your chuck norris that your chuck norris would ever hope to do to Chuck Norris!"
Me - "Probably right"
Chuck Norris defeated two of the five Nephilim, got bored, and left Ravnica forever. Everyone thought it was Niv-Mizzet, because no one could bear to watch who was doing the roundhouse kicks on the Nephilim, and The Firemind took the moment to boost his ego.
In a related story, the reason why we never see Niv-Mizzet again is because Chuck Norris did not like him taking the glory, and promptly roundhouse kicked the Firemind in the face.
Chuck Norris can run the full length of an Autochthon Wurm in two minutes, and then kill it with a roundhouse kick.
The reason the Golgari keep spreading is because Chuck Norris secretly kills 90% of Ravnica in his spare time with roundhouse kicks. The only reason it’s still a secret is because House Dimir takes all the credit.
That Which Was Taken originally belonged to Chuck Norris. The Kami were so scared he might get angry at them, they rushed to get it back from Konda, Lord of Eiganjo, resulting in the Kami War.
If someone made a Stuffy Doll target Chuck Norris, Chuck could roundhouse kick and destroy it without maiming himself. Then he would roundhouse kick the guy who made the doll.
WhenVisara the Dreadful looks at Chuck Norris, she is the one who turns to stone.
I participate yearly in a survival challenge in which I am dropped off in the wilderness with 1 days rations, a knife, and no other supplies, and have to find my way home. This is typically several weeks hiking from civilization.
I have personally killed several bears in the course of this challenge, with the use of snares and other traps.
We live in a country were ~50% of the populace believe public schooling is a socialist conspiracy and that being called Einstein is an insult. We could try and fix it, but unfortunately the other 50% don't believe in euthanasia.
Chuck Norris Can Roundhouse kick his own butt (but he wouldnt want to tell you how. Its a Chuck Norris Secret)
Chuck Norris saw Makihito Mihara playing Dragonstorm and he roundhouse Kicked his deck to release the 4 hellkites that suddenly turned into Dragon Whelps because of Chuck Norris' killer smile
Chuck Norris became so powerful that he destroyed Super Saiyan 4 Gogeta in DragonBall Z
Chuck Norris was so wise that he beat confucius out of mah-jong
Chuck Norris was so good in fighting that the UFC decided not to make him join. Not even step into the audience area because he might roundhouse kick anyone there.
CHuck Norris was so good in this roundhouse kick that he could do it with his both legs at tha same time.
Chuck Norris realized how powerful he was so he decided to join the dark side of the force
Chuck Norris was the one who taught yoda how to use a lightsaber
Chuck Norris was the one who saved mankind from the smallpox disease because of the roundhouse kick he made with the virus
Chuck Norris made superman melt even if superman was the man of steel
Chuck Norris made besfriends with Michael Jackson and he showed MJ how to do the roundhouse moonwalk.
Chuck Norris had a sneeze and made Texas Disappear from the US map.
Chuck Norris named his roundhouse kick "death"
There is no such word as invincible before. Chuck Norris invented the word writing it in blood.
Chuck Norris once heard a song "Eye of the Tiger" and roundhouse kicked a Siberian Tiger until it popped its eyes out. Chuck Norris ate them for lunch.
Chuck Norris saw Krosan Cloudscraper And shouted "Shivan Meteor"!. The Meteor fell from the skies dealing 13 damage to the krosan Cloudscraper. Tsk Tsk Tsk. Poor thing.
well, got think more..Lets make this the funniest thread ever.;)
When a scientist found the cure for cancer, Chuck Norris roundhouse kicked the entire lab, destroying it and killing the scientist. Why? Because he felt death by cancer was more humane than death by Chuck Norris.
Someone once told Chuck Norris the roundhouse kick was not the most effective way to kill a man. This is widely regarded by historians as the worst mistake in human history.
Chuck Norris doesn't go hunting; "hunting" implies the possibility of failure. Chuck Norris goes killing.
Chuck Norris was so damn strong that the Gods Of Olympus wouldnt even dare to go down to earth.
Chuck Norris tried decided to go to CHina and seconds later, The great wall was destroyed by a roundhouse kick.
CHuck Norris' greatest roundhouse kick is when he showed it off for the world record. His roundhouse kick have beaten the world record of the Earth's equator.
Chuck Norris looked at a guy and with the blink of an eye the guy was pulverized by an invisible strike.
Chuck Norris was accused for making the tower of Pisa lean..
While Chuck Norris was asleep, somone tried to kill him. That guy is having his eternal sleep right now.
Chuck Norris looked at the sun and a solar eclipse suddenly came.
Chuck Norris looked at the moon and a lunar eclipse suddenly came.
Chuck Norris wanted to use his fists for a while. Suddenly he invented the roundhouse punch.
Chuck Norris played magic and demanded to have a Split Second Instant card called "Roundhouse kick" that enabled a player to automatically win the game.
Chuck Norris greatest music hits are "Ill roundhouse you to dust", "Roundhouse to Nuthouse" and "Let me see you dance to my roundhouse"
Chuck Norris was banned in the breakdancing career because all he ever did was a roundhouse kick that merely killed many dancers.
Chuck Norris edited the movie "the karate kid". And instead of the kid using the tiger kick stance, it showed the roundhouse kick of Chuck Norris
Chuck Norris was the one who taught Elvis Presley to dance.
Chuck Norris defeated Ruby Weapon in Final Fantasy 7.
Chuck Norris was the front page of a fighting magazine and all the people ever see in the cover is a striking foot directly at the reader's face.
Chuck Norris jumped off a 100 storey building and flew like a helicopter using his roundhouse kick as a propeller.
I'm sorry if you've heard this one but here goes...
In the average American room, there are over 40 things that can be used to kill you. Chuck Norris can use every last one of those 40 things plus the room itself to kill you.
Good one. wanna know the 41st thing that can be used to kill you? Its Chuck Norris himself. He doesnt even need a thing to kill. One roundhouse and its the end of the world.
Chuck Norris has flying, first strike, trample, haste, protection from all colors, protection from colorless, Double strike Split second, Cant be countered, Flash, Vigilance. Has an ability called R:Roundhouse kick storm(Chuck Norris does a roundhousek kick. When you do this ability, copy it for each spell played before it this turn)
Chuck Norris is the reason why Bruce Lee is history. Jet Li and Jackie Chan are the next ones in Norris's list
Chuck Norris once saw a guy trying to imitate CHuck's roundhouse kick. Seconds later, that guy now tries to assemble his jaw.
Chuck Norris once entered a boxing match. Irritated on not using his legs, he roundhouse kicked a referee and it made millions of fighting fans request for another kind of fighting match. This is now called UFC.
Chuck Norris was the one who discovered the human spleen.
Chuck Norris, like any US president, was tried to be assassinated. Now, Assassins gave their full respect to Chuck Norris, for how could they forget that the word "assassinate" was roundhouse kicked by Chuck into Webster's dictionary.
Chuck Norris was the founder of Ninjutsu, and other kinds of martial arts and fighting styles. But he never taught the forbidden technique. I guess you know what that is.
Chuck Norris asked for a one minute miracle. He couldnt do the Roundhouse kick for exactly one whole minute.
Chuck Norris was the best escape artist of them all. Even better than houdini. He roundhouse kicked every handcuffs and locks all throughout his body.
CHuck Norris snapped his fingers and instantaneously, someone was burned into dust. This made Flame Alchemist of full metal alchemist popular.
Chuck Norris tried to shave his beard, but his beard actually shaved the razor.
Chuck Norris tried to pull one hair from his beard. He called it "Lethal Weapon"
Chuck Norris was the reason why dragons were considered a fairy tale. It actually existed until Chuck Norris slayed them all with roundhouse kicks. And btw, Chuck was the one who has firebreathing abilities, not the dragons.
Chuck Norris defeated Ruby Weapon in Final Fantasy 7.
What makes this especially impressive is that he did so simply by staring at the screen. Chuck Norris is the only person in the world who is feared by digital objects.
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Quote from Scott Adams »
Nothing defines humans better than their willingness to do irrational things in the pursuit of phenomenally unlikely payoffs.
This is the principle behind lotteries, dating, and religion
Quote from *sigh...* *dreamy smile* »
She's a two-faced ****rag ***** bucket with NO grasp on reality or objectivity let alone sincerity or humanity!!! She FEEDS on drama, all day every day, like a ****ing prostitute feeds on STDs--- in much the same way, mind you...
A man once told Chuck Norris the laws of physics would not let him grow any bigger or stronger. He then roundhouse kicked physics so many times he can now grow as big and as strong as he wants whenever he wants.
A man once told Chuck Norris the laws of physics would not let him grow any bigger or stronger. He then roundhouse kicked physics so many times he can now grow as big and as strong as he wants whenever he wants.
HAHAHA!! This is a good one!!! definitely to be remembered!
Here's some add ons:
Chuck Norris is a cooking Machine. He has a list of Ingredients, swallows them all, then vomit it, and VOILA!!! RECIPE DONE!
Chuck Norris as a boy was teased as "Chuckle Chicken". He immediately destroyed those who teased him by a blinding strike. He discovered his ultimate power: The Roundhouse Kick
Some guy said that Chuck Norris was not the first one to do the roundhouse kick. That guy now writes the sentence "Chuck Norris is the only being in the world who knows the roundhouse kick." in the blackboard repeatedly for 17 years.
Chuck Norris always knew when someone was trying to attack him. Even a person's thought of it didnt escape, Chuck Norris had a mind power that can make people have never ending nightmares of Chuck Norris bashing their faces of millions of Roundhouse kicks.
Before there was only heaven. But when Chuck Norris visited, he roundhouse kicked Heaven's garage deep down into the Earths atmosphere. The garage was renamed "HELL"
The 7 wonders of the World were made created by Chuck Norris, the 8th wonder of the world.
Michael Jackson's Color change was not caused by surgeries or any kind of medicine. The unknown truth is, Chuck Norris Roundhouse kicked black MJ until he turned white.
Chuck Norris tried to roundhouse kick himself. He was the only person in the world to have evaded a strike that's 11 times faster than the speed of light.
Chuck Norris was the record holder of everything..
Chuck Norris was bitten by a black mamba. The Black mamba died even before it could release its venom. the reason why is because any living creature who have contact with Chuck Norris will die because of a skin-venom that's even worse than ten times the biological weaponry of Russia. He even had a mutant daughter named Rougue.
Chuck Norris was the only person in the world to see Atlantis and El Dorado, both of them roundhouse kicked by Chuck into some place we wil never, EVER see.
Chuck Norris Jokes could be about Bruce Lee, but then they wouldn't be jokes.
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Invites for mee?! 69 posts at 7:23PM, June 1st, 2007, Eastern US. YaYa!!
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Q: Will America's missile shield over Europe affect prices of foreign cards? A: It will. WotC will use its Magic Online programming team to hack into the missile shield control center. This will cause the control center to crash frequently . One of those crashes will lead to the bombing of every distributor in Europe. I'm afraid the effect on card prices will be catastrophic.
Chuck Norris chuck norrised those unchuck norrises....Ok maybe not every word in the sentence but with a few round house kicks to the English Language, I'm sure Chuck could change that
Intersting conversation the over day let to this statement:
Them - "You can't go chuck norris on Chuck Norris! Chuck Norris would do twice as much chuck norris to your chuck norris that your chuck norris would ever hope to do to Chuck Norris!"
Me - "Probably right"
Chuck Norris is the 5th element
Chuck norris can kick his own ass-literally and figuratively.
chuck norris can have an orgasm at will.
Chuck Norris knows Rosewaters secret agenda for Future Sight
Chuck Norris is also Mr. Linderman.
Note to self: Your mafia theories are usually wrong, so don't act on them.
Chuck Norris saved the cheerleader and saved the world.
Chuck Norris is so awesome, just thinking that "he's so awesome" is enough to roundhouse kick you senseless.
Note to self: Your mafia theories are usually wrong, so don't act on them.
Someone was offended by this. Warning.
Chuck Norris can destroy a Darksteel Colossus with a single roundhouse kick.
When Chuck Norris touches Phage the Untouchable, she is the one who dies.
A Squire was once trained by Chuck Norris. He later became known as Gerrard Capashen.
The only reason Marit Lage is frozen in her Dark Depths is because she is hiding from Chuck Norris.
One of the most iconic words in Magic was inspired by Chuck Norris: Planeswalker.
Chuck Norris eats Black Lotuses for breakfast.
Chuck Norris defeated two of the five Nephilim, got bored, and left Ravnica forever. Everyone thought it was Niv-Mizzet, because no one could bear to watch who was doing the roundhouse kicks on the Nephilim, and The Firemind took the moment to boost his ego.
In a related story, the reason why we never see Niv-Mizzet again is because Chuck Norris did not like him taking the glory, and promptly roundhouse kicked the Firemind in the face.
Chuck Norris can run the full length of an Autochthon Wurm in two minutes, and then kill it with a roundhouse kick.
The reason the Golgari keep spreading is because Chuck Norris secretly kills 90% of Ravnica in his spare time with roundhouse kicks. The only reason it’s still a secret is because House Dimir takes all the credit.
Chuck Norris uses Umezawa’s Jitte as a dinner fork.
That Which Was Taken originally belonged to Chuck Norris. The Kami were so scared he might get angry at them, they rushed to get it back from Konda, Lord of Eiganjo, resulting in the Kami War.
If someone made a Stuffy Doll target Chuck Norris, Chuck could roundhouse kick and destroy it without maiming himself. Then he would roundhouse kick the guy who made the doll.
When Visara the Dreadful looks at Chuck Norris, she is the one who turns to stone.
Source: http://breakingthemagic.com/index.php?comicID=2
How well do you do against one?
Shouldn't chuck norris cost -infinate. So when he comes into play, he gives you infinate mana.
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Note to self: Your mafia theories are usually wrong, so don't act on them.
Chuck Norris saw Makihito Mihara playing Dragonstorm and he roundhouse Kicked his deck to release the 4 hellkites that suddenly turned into Dragon Whelps because of Chuck Norris' killer smile
Chuck Norris became so powerful that he destroyed Super Saiyan 4 Gogeta in DragonBall Z
Chuck Norris was so wise that he beat confucius out of mah-jong
Chuck Norris was so good in fighting that the UFC decided not to make him join. Not even step into the audience area because he might roundhouse kick anyone there.
CHuck Norris was so good in this roundhouse kick that he could do it with his both legs at tha same time.
Chuck Norris realized how powerful he was so he decided to join the dark side of the force
Chuck Norris was the one who taught yoda how to use a lightsaber
Chuck Norris was the one who saved mankind from the smallpox disease because of the roundhouse kick he made with the virus
Chuck Norris made superman melt even if superman was the man of steel
Chuck Norris made besfriends with Michael Jackson and he showed MJ how to do the roundhouse moonwalk.
Chuck Norris had a sneeze and made Texas Disappear from the US map.
Chuck Norris named his roundhouse kick "death"
There is no such word as invincible before. Chuck Norris invented the word writing it in blood.
Chuck Norris once heard a song "Eye of the Tiger" and roundhouse kicked a Siberian Tiger until it popped its eyes out. Chuck Norris ate them for lunch.
Chuck Norris saw Krosan Cloudscraper And shouted "Shivan Meteor"!. The Meteor fell from the skies dealing 13 damage to the krosan Cloudscraper. Tsk Tsk Tsk. Poor thing.
well, got think more..Lets make this the funniest thread ever.;)
Monogreen 2007 | Jund Aggro MTGO 2013
Once I saw Chuck Norris directly to the eye; after 10 years of therapy, I still think I am a duck... and the roundhouse kick scar is still in my face.
Chuck Norris doesn't go hunting; "hunting" implies the possibility of failure. Chuck Norris goes killing.
Winner of the Weekly Signature & Avatar Contest Weeks 51, 59, 78, & 118.
I don't care if I was framed for murder if I only got a warning I would let it go.
Chuck Norris tried decided to go to CHina and seconds later, The great wall was destroyed by a roundhouse kick.
CHuck Norris' greatest roundhouse kick is when he showed it off for the world record. His roundhouse kick have beaten the world record of the Earth's equator.
Chuck Norris looked at a guy and with the blink of an eye the guy was pulverized by an invisible strike.
Chuck Norris was accused for making the tower of Pisa lean..
While Chuck Norris was asleep, somone tried to kill him. That guy is having his eternal sleep right now.
Chuck Norris looked at the sun and a solar eclipse suddenly came.
Chuck Norris looked at the moon and a lunar eclipse suddenly came.
Chuck Norris wanted to use his fists for a while. Suddenly he invented the roundhouse punch.
Chuck Norris played magic and demanded to have a Split Second Instant card called "Roundhouse kick" that enabled a player to automatically win the game.
Chuck Norris greatest music hits are "Ill roundhouse you to dust", "Roundhouse to Nuthouse" and "Let me see you dance to my roundhouse"
Chuck Norris was banned in the breakdancing career because all he ever did was a roundhouse kick that merely killed many dancers.
Chuck Norris edited the movie "the karate kid". And instead of the kid using the tiger kick stance, it showed the roundhouse kick of Chuck Norris
Chuck Norris was the one who taught Elvis Presley to dance.
Chuck Norris defeated Ruby Weapon in Final Fantasy 7.
Chuck Norris was the front page of a fighting magazine and all the people ever see in the cover is a striking foot directly at the reader's face.
Chuck Norris jumped off a 100 storey building and flew like a helicopter using his roundhouse kick as a propeller.
Whew, more ideas comin!;)
Monogreen 2007 | Jund Aggro MTGO 2013
In the average American room, there are over 40 things that can be used to kill you. Chuck Norris can use every last one of those 40 things plus the room itself to kill you.
Chuck Norris has flying, first strike, trample, haste, protection from all colors, protection from colorless, Double strike Split second, Cant be countered, Flash, Vigilance. Has an ability called R:Roundhouse kick storm(Chuck Norris does a roundhousek kick. When you do this ability, copy it for each spell played before it this turn)
Chuck Norris is the reason why Bruce Lee is history. Jet Li and Jackie Chan are the next ones in Norris's list
Chuck Norris once saw a guy trying to imitate CHuck's roundhouse kick. Seconds later, that guy now tries to assemble his jaw.
Chuck Norris once entered a boxing match. Irritated on not using his legs, he roundhouse kicked a referee and it made millions of fighting fans request for another kind of fighting match. This is now called UFC.
Chuck Norris was the one who discovered the human spleen.
Chuck Norris, like any US president, was tried to be assassinated. Now, Assassins gave their full respect to Chuck Norris, for how could they forget that the word "assassinate" was roundhouse kicked by Chuck into Webster's dictionary.
Chuck Norris was the founder of Ninjutsu, and other kinds of martial arts and fighting styles. But he never taught the forbidden technique. I guess you know what that is.
Chuck Norris asked for a one minute miracle. He couldnt do the Roundhouse kick for exactly one whole minute.
Chuck Norris was the best escape artist of them all. Even better than houdini. He roundhouse kicked every handcuffs and locks all throughout his body.
CHuck Norris snapped his fingers and instantaneously, someone was burned into dust. This made Flame Alchemist of full metal alchemist popular.
Chuck Norris tried to shave his beard, but his beard actually shaved the razor.
Chuck Norris tried to pull one hair from his beard. He called it "Lethal Weapon"
Chuck Norris was the reason why dragons were considered a fairy tale. It actually existed until Chuck Norris slayed them all with roundhouse kicks. And btw, Chuck was the one who has firebreathing abilities, not the dragons.
More ideas comin up!
Monogreen 2007 | Jund Aggro MTGO 2013
What makes this especially impressive is that he did so simply by staring at the screen. Chuck Norris is the only person in the world who is feared by digital objects.
Avatar courtesy of the wondermous Lord Tirian.
Winner of the Weekly Signature & Avatar Contest Weeks 51, 59, 78, & 118.
I don't care if I was framed for murder if I only got a warning I would let it go.
HAHAHA!! This is a good one!!! definitely to be remembered!
Here's some add ons:
Chuck Norris is a cooking Machine. He has a list of Ingredients, swallows them all, then vomit it, and VOILA!!! RECIPE DONE!
Chuck Norris as a boy was teased as "Chuckle Chicken". He immediately destroyed those who teased him by a blinding strike. He discovered his ultimate power: The Roundhouse Kick
Some guy said that Chuck Norris was not the first one to do the roundhouse kick. That guy now writes the sentence "Chuck Norris is the only being in the world who knows the roundhouse kick." in the blackboard repeatedly for 17 years.
Chuck Norris always knew when someone was trying to attack him. Even a person's thought of it didnt escape, Chuck Norris had a mind power that can make people have never ending nightmares of Chuck Norris bashing their faces of millions of Roundhouse kicks.
Before there was only heaven. But when Chuck Norris visited, he roundhouse kicked Heaven's garage deep down into the Earths atmosphere. The garage was renamed "HELL"
The 7 wonders of the World were made created by Chuck Norris, the 8th wonder of the world.
Michael Jackson's Color change was not caused by surgeries or any kind of medicine. The unknown truth is, Chuck Norris Roundhouse kicked black MJ until he turned white.
Chuck Norris tried to roundhouse kick himself. He was the only person in the world to have evaded a strike that's 11 times faster than the speed of light.
Chuck Norris was the record holder of everything..
Chuck Norris was bitten by a black mamba. The Black mamba died even before it could release its venom. the reason why is because any living creature who have contact with Chuck Norris will die because of a skin-venom that's even worse than ten times the biological weaponry of Russia. He even had a mutant daughter named Rougue.
Chuck Norris was the only person in the world to see Atlantis and El Dorado, both of them roundhouse kicked by Chuck into some place we wil never, EVER see.
More ideas comin'
Monogreen 2007 | Jund Aggro MTGO 2013
69 posts at 7:23PM, June 1st, 2007, Eastern US. YaYa!!
Bruce Lee was, in fact, even stronger than Chuck Norris. That's why he's dead.
In the beginning, the universe was only empty, black infinity. Chuck Norris roundhouse kicked it, then there was life.
Chuck Norris can build a plane from air molecules. he turns them solid as he builds.
Chuck Norris can shoot bowling balls from his navel and elephants from his ears.
God said, "let there be light". Chuck Norris answered "Okay."
The Bible was originally called "Chuck Norris and Friends."
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Member of the UIZZET!R Apprentice of Time Manipulation