Gray Merchant of Asphodel sure came a long long way from past attempts to make that effect playable. That said, if this would hit every player, I might consider playing it in a dedicated lifedrain deck.
I know it was a mechanically skewed set, but I loved MM block. Great art portrayls, some excellent flavor text, and awesome card names. To bad this one wasn't a bit better.
I like the pseudohaste effect, but at four mana for a 2/2, it's kind of bad. Blackcleave Goblin is similar with infect and haste, and a good rule of thumb is, "infect creature without infect" means "limited at best". Most infect creatures went through some rejiggering because you don't want to make it easy to do 10 damage just like that.
Card advantage is not the same thing as card draw. Something for 2B cannot be strictly worse than something for BBB or 3BB. If you're taking out Swords to Plowshares for Plummet, you're a fool. Stop doing these things!
There's surprisingly little redundancy for this kind of effect (i.e. creatures that cause loss of life or deal damage to opponents when they enter the battlefield), but this is pretty bad. Gary isn't necessarily strictly better (since it costs B more) but may as well be since it hits all opponents and thus gains way more life even if you have no other black symbols to count. Bloodhunter Bat is more or less strictly better though, with the creature type being a small potatoes thing for adding flying and an easier cost. Even then, it'd be hard to justify either card even in a durdly Alesha, Who Smiles at Death Aristocrats list especially with something like Fire Imp or the triggers of Zulaport Cuththroat and Purphoros, God of the Forge serving better. Side note- for people that like to deal small amounts of damage with EtB triggers over and over and over, Theros was a Godsend. Purphy, Gary, Fanatic of Mogis, the terrible but existent Pharagax Giant...
I think even in a theoretical Mercenary commander list, I'd rather jam Conspiracy and Gray Merchant. 1/10.
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Sufferer of EDHD
Commander - Currently Playing: RCRDaretti: Superfriends Forever RCR WGBDoran: Ent-mootWBG GGGMultani: Group Bear HugGGG GB(B/G)The Gitrog Monster: Dredgefall DurdleGB(B/G) RGWGahiji, the Honored Group Hug MonsterRGW UB(U/B)Yuriko, Ninja Trinket AggroUB(U/B) WUBRGAtogatog: Assembling a OHKOWUBRG
Made it into my first ever deck, mono black with evasion, removal, and life drain. Respectable in limited, even without mercenaries to tutor for it, but bad otherwise. Interesting to note that I think the formula for making mercenaries a good tribe, or at least playable, was written all over this guy and barely missed. Rebels let you spend more mana than their CMC to tutor up a potentially larger Rebel, so it made sense to take a Rebel out of play from attacking for a turn to upgrade on size, often to a rebel that could itself upgrade on size, and it meant that you could get started on the chain immediately, as there was a 1 drop that could tutor for a 2 drop and so on. Mercenaries, on the other hand, let you spend one less mana than their CMC to tutor a smaller mercenary. That meant that you couldn't start the chain right away, and it meant that you had to defer attacking to get a smaller creature on the board, which wasn't worth it. Wasn't worth it unless, of course, the smaller creature gained you additional value or the larger creature wasn't good at attacking. Mercenaries should have been an ETB centric tribe, so tutoring for a smaller creature would have made sense because the value of your creatures would have been in what they did when they came into play rather than their combat stats. Highway Robber should have had the mercenary ability to tutor for a 3 drop, and you should have been getting him off of a 5 drop that made an opponent discard two or sac a creature. And there should have been a legend to mirror Lin Sivvi. Alas, it never was. Still hoping we one day get one in a supplemental product. Maybe Conspiracy 3? Seems a good as place as any to revisit Rebels and Mercenaries.
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The Meaning of Life: "M-hmm. Well, it's nothing very special. Uh, try and be nice to people, avoid eating fat, read a good book every now and then, get some walking in, and try and live together in peace and harmony with people of all creeds and nations"
Onering's 4 simple steps that let you solve any problem with Magic's gameplay
Whether its blue players countering your spells, red players burning you out, or combo, if you have a problem with an aspect of Magic's gameplay, you can fix it!
Step 1: Identify the problem. What aspect of Magic don't you like? Step 2: Find out how others deal with the problem. How do players deal with this aspect of the game when they run into it? Step 3: Do what those players do. Step 4: No more problem. Bonus: You are now better at Magic. Enjoy those extra wins!
Gray Merchant of Asphodel sure came a long long way from past attempts to make that effect playable. That said, if this would hit every player, I might consider playing it in a dedicated lifedrain deck.
It's not very good but hey, it's Arnold Schwarzenegger.
Yeah, Gary outclasses this guy in every way except manacost. Size, creature type relevance 95% of the time, abuseability, total output. But that's understandable because Gary is really good.
I'd only consider it if I was really pushing the Mercenary theme.
A shame that this only targets one player, otherwise it would be a very interesting drain effect. I ran this in one of my first decks, a super trashy mono black deck stuffed with is even-worse nightmare twin Soul Scourge and his superior brother Laquatus's Champion.
I'd actually like to see more variants of this ability where it scales the way Gary does. Like, for creatures in the graveyard, or the number of vampires you control, or the number of swamps you control, or something.
The obvious other way this ability works is to trigger off something else, the way Blood Artist is a death trigger.
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Card advantage is not the same thing as card draw. Something for 2B cannot be strictly worse than something for BBB or 3BB. If you're taking out Swords to Plowshares for Plummet, you're a fool. Stop doing these things!
Chandra, Torch of Defiance - Oops! All Chandras.
Prime Speaker Zegana - Draw for Power.
Pir & Toothy - Counterpalooza.
Arcades, the Strategist - Another Brick in the Wall.
Zacama, Primal Calamity - Calamity of Double Mana.
Edgar Markov - Vampires Don't Die.
Child of Alara - Dreamcrusher.
OK against artifacts that tap or sac themselves, but realistically it just slows them down while also slowing you down. It costs 1 so its a target for Yisan the first time you tap him?
Also, if it weren't for Kitchen Finks, Ouphes would be competing with homarids for the title of the most clownshoes creature type. Yeah, Gilder Bairn and Dusk Urchins are sort of useful, but so is Homarid Shaman.
The Meaning of Life: "M-hmm. Well, it's nothing very special. Uh, try and be nice to people, avoid eating fat, read a good book every now and then, get some walking in, and try and live together in peace and harmony with people of all creeds and nations"
Onering's 4 simple steps that let you solve any problem with Magic's gameplay
Whether its blue players countering your spells, red players burning you out, or combo, if you have a problem with an aspect of Magic's gameplay, you can fix it!
Step 1: Identify the problem. What aspect of Magic don't you like? Step 2: Find out how others deal with the problem. How do players deal with this aspect of the game when they run into it? Step 3: Do what those players do. Step 4: No more problem. Bonus: You are now better at Magic. Enjoy those extra wins!
I'm a fan of Ouphe Vandals for the "green artifact stifle" effect. It's one-time use, but it also destroys the artifact so they can't try again.
Rust is also nice, since they don't see it coming (just like Stifle, but in a color they're not expecting it from)
Def not the place, but I'm going to anyway(what authoritah?), does this counter the shuffle trigger on TheCollossi? The cards you have listed, that is.
Either way, it's not really that bad. I guess it's just that it's in a color that has access to better options. However, this was printed original Mirrodin, the block where Indestructible was first keyworded, so El Naturál just wasn't going to cut it. I mean, I wouldn't be surprised if this saw play in all honesty. Imagine, in Christmas land mind you, flashing this onto the battlefield with haste, maybe the 'ole Sneak Attack(pun intended), to counter their Aetherflux Reservoir. Now, wouldn't that just be ouphish.
Also, I want there to be an upcoming block that is dedicated to these "strange" creature types. I'd almost go so far as to say that maybe that idea is what inspired Lorwyn(obvious spitballing here, but hear me out.), the setting was correct. They did expand Kithkin, Treedolk and Fae in a somewhat significant manner, the latter by a more significant amount, but probably somewhere along the way marketing was involved and they realized that the setting, art design and mechanics were already going to be a "shock" that they opted for some tried and true CT's. Either way. Yeah, more Ouphes, Hommorids, Gargoyles and the like.
Def not the place, but I'm going to anyway(what authoritah?), does this counter the shuffle trigger on TheCollossi? The cards you have listed, that is.
There are several reasons why they wouldn't work, the first being that neither Ouphe Vandals nor Rust cant target a triggered ability and the second being that even if they could, Blightsteel Colossus and Darksteel Colossus don't have triggered abilities anyway, they are replacement effects.
As for the Brown Ouphe I could see it in something like Edric, where it could do some decent work keeping an Oblivion Stone at bay or some such.
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"The Ancients teach us that if we can but last, we shall prevail."
—Kaysa, Elder Druid of the Juniper Order
Hmm, it is repeatable, but then reanimating Caustic Caterpillar isn't that hard and at least it's a Naturalize on legs. But for recurring artifact / enchantment hate on a body, I always have a soft spot for Nullmage Advocate, since it's also political and that's what you want when three of you gang up on the Stax deck.
This guy's trying hard, and I might side him in if I was desperate, but not better than lukewarm.
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Given the artifact density of EDH, I'm sure this guy bounces around the table a LOT. Zedruu tech?
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My Commander decks:
Chandra, Torch of Defiance - Oops! All Chandras.
Prime Speaker Zegana - Draw for Power.
Pir & Toothy - Counterpalooza.
Arcades, the Strategist - Another Brick in the Wall.
Zacama, Primal Calamity - Calamity of Double Mana.
Edgar Markov - Vampires Don't Die.
Child of Alara - Dreamcrusher.
Yeah, Zedruu. Even then, I'm sure he'll get sac'd by the first player to have a sac outlet available.
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Card advantage is not the same thing as card draw. Something for 2B cannot be strictly worse than something for BBB or 3BB. If you're taking out Swords to Plowshares for Plummet, you're a fool. Stop doing these things!
If it was an ETB trigger instead of a cast trigger, this might've actually been a decent card in Dromoka/Ojutai Dragon decks. As is, I don't know if I'd ever truly consider it.
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My Commander decks:
Chandra, Torch of Defiance - Oops! All Chandras.
Prime Speaker Zegana - Draw for Power.
Pir & Toothy - Counterpalooza.
Arcades, the Strategist - Another Brick in the Wall.
Zacama, Primal Calamity - Calamity of Double Mana.
Edgar Markov - Vampires Don't Die.
Child of Alara - Dreamcrusher.
I know it was a mechanically skewed set, but I loved MM block. Great art portrayls, some excellent flavor text, and awesome card names. To bad this one wasn't a bit better.
See also
Giant Spider/Blightwidow
Metathran Soldier/Blighted Agent
Bog Imp/Plague Stinger
Standing Troops/Priests of Norn
Willow Elf/Glistener Elf
3/10 I like the idea. It might go in my nonexistent mercenary deck that I have no plans to build ever.
On phasing:
I think even in a theoretical Mercenary commander list, I'd rather jam Conspiracy and Gray Merchant. 1/10.
RCRDaretti: Superfriends Forever RCR
WGBDoran: Ent-mootWBG
GGGMultani: Group Bear HugGGG
GB(B/G)The Gitrog Monster: Dredgefall DurdleGB(B/G)
RGWGahiji, the Honored Group Hug MonsterRGW
UB(U/B)Yuriko, Ninja Trinket AggroUB(U/B)
WUBRGAtogatog: Assembling a OHKOWUBRG
Onering's 4 simple steps that let you solve any problem with Magic's gameplay
Step 1: Identify the problem. What aspect of Magic don't you like? Step 2: Find out how others deal with the problem. How do players deal with this aspect of the game when they run into it? Step 3: Do what those players do. Step 4: No more problem. Bonus: You are now better at Magic. Enjoy those extra wins!
The Unidentified Fantastic Flying Girl.
EDH
Xenagos, the God of Stompy
The Gitrog Monster: Oppressive Value.
Marchesa, Marionette Master - Undying Robots
Yuriko, the Hydra Omnivore
I make dolls as a hobby.
It's not very good but hey, it's Arnold Schwarzenegger.
Shu Yun, the Silent Tempest WUR Voltron Control
Temmet, Vizier of Naktamun WU Unblockable Mirror Trickery
Ra's al Ghul (Sidar Kondo) and Face-Down Ninjas
Brudiclad, Token Engineer
Vaevictis (VV2) the Dire Lantern
Rona, Disciple of Gix
Tiana the Auror
Hallar
Ulrich the Politician
Zur the Rebel
Scorpion, Locust, Scarab, Egyptian Gods
O-Kagachi, Mathas, Mairsil
"Non-Tribal" Tribal Generals, Eggs
I'd only consider it if I was really pushing the Mercenary theme.
The obvious other way this ability works is to trigger off something else, the way Blood Artist is a death trigger.
On phasing:
Great anti-Sol Ring tech except it isn't.
Chandra, Torch of Defiance - Oops! All Chandras.
Prime Speaker Zegana - Draw for Power.
Pir & Toothy - Counterpalooza.
Arcades, the Strategist - Another Brick in the Wall.
Zacama, Primal Calamity - Calamity of Double Mana.
Edgar Markov - Vampires Don't Die.
Child of Alara - Dreamcrusher.
OK against artifacts that tap or sac themselves, but realistically it just slows them down while also slowing you down. It costs 1 so its a target for Yisan the first time you tap him?
Also, if it weren't for Kitchen Finks, Ouphes would be competing with homarids for the title of the most clownshoes creature type. Yeah, Gilder Bairn and Dusk Urchins are sort of useful, but so is Homarid Shaman.
Onering's 4 simple steps that let you solve any problem with Magic's gameplay
Step 1: Identify the problem. What aspect of Magic don't you like? Step 2: Find out how others deal with the problem. How do players deal with this aspect of the game when they run into it? Step 3: Do what those players do. Step 4: No more problem. Bonus: You are now better at Magic. Enjoy those extra wins!
8.RG Green Devotion Ramp/Combo 9.UR Draw Triggers 10.WUR Group stalling 11.WUR Voltron Spellslinger 12.WB Sacrificial Shenanigans
13.BR Creatureless Panharmonicon 14.BR Pingers and Eldrazi 15.URG Untapped Cascading
16.Reyhan, last of the Abzan's WUBG +1/+1 Counter Craziness 17.WUBRG Dragons aka Why did I make this?
Building: The Gitrog Monster lands, Glissa the Traitor stax, Muldrotha, the Gravetide Planeswalker Combo, Kydele, Chosen of Kruphix + Sidar Kondo of Jamuraa Clues, and Tribal Scarecrow Planeswalkers
Rust is also nice, since they don't see it coming (just like Stifle, but in a color they're not expecting it from)
Two Score, Minus Two or: A Stargate Tail
(Image by totallynotabrony)
Def not the place, but I'm going to anyway(what authoritah?), does this counter the shuffle trigger on The Collossi? The cards you have listed, that is.
Either way, it's not really that bad. I guess it's just that it's in a color that has access to better options. However, this was printed original Mirrodin, the block where Indestructible was first keyworded, so El Naturál just wasn't going to cut it. I mean, I wouldn't be surprised if this saw play in all honesty. Imagine, in Christmas land mind you, flashing this onto the battlefield with haste, maybe the 'ole Sneak Attack(pun intended), to counter their Aetherflux Reservoir. Now, wouldn't that just be ouphish.
Also, I want there to be an upcoming block that is dedicated to these "strange" creature types. I'd almost go so far as to say that maybe that idea is what inspired Lorwyn(obvious spitballing here, but hear me out.), the setting was correct. They did expand Kithkin, Treedolk and Fae in a somewhat significant manner, the latter by a more significant amount, but probably somewhere along the way marketing was involved and they realized that the setting, art design and mechanics were already going to be a "shock" that they opted for some tried and true CT's. Either way. Yeah, more Ouphes, Hommorids, Gargoyles and the like.
There are several reasons why they wouldn't work, the first being that neither Ouphe Vandals nor Rust cant target a triggered ability and the second being that even if they could, Blightsteel Colossus and Darksteel Colossus don't have triggered abilities anyway, they are replacement effects.
As for the Brown Ouphe I could see it in something like Edric, where it could do some decent work keeping an Oblivion Stone at bay or some such.
—Kaysa, Elder Druid of the Juniper Order
This guy's trying hard, and I might side him in if I was desperate, but not better than lukewarm.
Given the artifact density of EDH, I'm sure this guy bounces around the table a LOT. Zedruu tech?
Chandra, Torch of Defiance - Oops! All Chandras.
Prime Speaker Zegana - Draw for Power.
Pir & Toothy - Counterpalooza.
Arcades, the Strategist - Another Brick in the Wall.
Zacama, Primal Calamity - Calamity of Double Mana.
Edgar Markov - Vampires Don't Die.
Child of Alara - Dreamcrusher.
On phasing:
If it was an ETB trigger instead of a cast trigger, this might've actually been a decent card in Dromoka/Ojutai Dragon decks. As is, I don't know if I'd ever truly consider it.
Chandra, Torch of Defiance - Oops! All Chandras.
Prime Speaker Zegana - Draw for Power.
Pir & Toothy - Counterpalooza.
Arcades, the Strategist - Another Brick in the Wall.
Zacama, Primal Calamity - Calamity of Double Mana.
Edgar Markov - Vampires Don't Die.
Child of Alara - Dreamcrusher.