Kaalia is mean, heartless, and cruel. She has a grudge against everyone, and won’t let a little thing like “politics” get in her way. She has a horde of angels, demons, and dragons at her back, after all. Who would dare stand up to her?
More than any of that, though, Kaalia doesn’t play by the rules. Who pays retail when you could get a creature for free? Not Kaalia, that’s for sure! In addition, Kaalia loves doing that more than once a turn! Multiple attack steps are fine by her! Add in a Sword and everything is pure AWESOME.
The plan of this deck is to beat down fast and hard. It has the removal package to offer political answers as well, in case the game gets too long. The main plan is to attack! I like this deck because I get to play all of my favorite fatties, and the flavor… it tastes like EPIC.
Card Choices
Kaalia Targets
Angels Karmic Guide - Recursion is good. She’s probably my weakest creature offensively, but the creature she gets back sure won’t be! Angelic Skirmisher - I won’t usually be cheating her in with Kaalia, but she is relatively cheap to hard-cast. She can give lifelink or vigilance on my turn, and first strike on everyone else’s so I don’t have to worry as much about trading. Aurelia, the Warleader - Again, I won’t cheat her in with Kaalia’s trigger, as she’s more useful when she attacks on her own. Again, she’s relatively cheap. Deathless Angel - She will at the very least protect your best guy. As long as they aren’t wearing greaves! Darksteel Plate might be better in this slot, but that is currently in Ashling. Angel of Despair - Vindicate onnastick. I’m rarely disappointed by this topdeck. Angel of Serenity - Gets three guys out of the way (bonus: get someone to destroy her while the trigger’s on the stack for a pretty good permanent answer to problem guys) or gets three guys back, or a little of both. Gisela, Blade of Goldnight - One of the best creatures in the deck. Naturally, one of the biggest targets, too. Don’t drop it until you win the game. Demons Bloodgift Demon - Any extra draws off of him are gravy, but I expect him to be removed or stolen, really. Ob Nixilis, the Fallen - He gets out of hand quickly. Move the Greaves or Boots to him if you can manage it. Harvester of Souls - If he gets dropped right before a wrath, he has the potential to draw you a great deal of cards (just not off the Rhys player, unfortunately). Remember his trigger! Oni of Wild Places - Not a bad size, and he has haste. Also, he serves as an Erratic Portal for the next guy… Rakdos the Defiler - Old Rakdos, Kaalia’s bff. Best saved for someone who draws your ire, so as not to make enemies early on. Don’t hesitate to sac some lands and swing if given the opportunity. Life’s more fun that way! Lord of the Void - One of the awesome Gatecrash additions to the deck. Swing once, he’s good. Swing twice, you’re probably winning. Rune-Scarred Demon - Drop him, tutor and cast Savage Beating, gg. Dragons Hellkite Charger - Like his buddy Aurelia, he doesn’t like being cheated in as much. Give him Sword of Feast and Famine for giggles. Hellkite Tyrant - Those are nice mana rocks. Mind if I borrow them? Forever? That’s right, your opponents don’t get their stuff back if they kill him. Seems fair. Hoard-Smelter Dragon - Typically, I will use him purely for artifact removal. He’s scary enough to some to draw removal, but if he is cheated in, you will typically have enough mana to take something down with him. Oros, the Avenger - I haven’t had a chance to play him yet, but he is in here for flavor reasons as much as he is here for board-wipe potential. Fun fact: most of the small guys in the deck are white. Ryusei, the Falling Star - He really wishes he was Kokopuffs, but he is fun nonetheless. Steel Hellkite - One of the most versatile creatures in the deck. You can pick off a problem permanent, or a horde of tokens. He is a pretty big removal target. Balefire Dragon - Targeted wrath? Don’t mind if I do! Scourge of Kher Ridges - I haven’t had a chance to use him yet, but his flexibility makes him a really attractive member of the team. Utvara Hellkite - His ability is activated by dragons. This deck plays dragons. No brainer, really (but his ability isn’t triggered by Kaalia-aided attacks, unfortunately)
Other Creatures
You might have noticed all of the non-Angel/Demon/Dragon creatures have the subtype of Cleric. So does Kaalia! Pretty neat, huh? Mother of Runes - Rarely ever lives long enough to do her job well, but she draws removal pretty handily and can easily result in a 2-for-1. Also c’mon, she’s MOM Weathered Wayfarer - I have loved this guy twice as much ever since I found out he was a Human Soldier Cleric. Like Mom, he typically doesn’t stick around long, but that is typically long enough to at least grab a Reliquary Tower if I need one. Also a mini-beatstick if the rest of your opponents are mana-screwed. Grand Abolisher - Counterspells? No thanks! A bit of a nostalgia factor here as well, but he can also get rid of a piece of removal early game… not on my turn, of course~ Doomed Necromancer - Honestly haven’t used him yet, but I like him enough to include him anyway. Mikaeus, the Unhallowed - This deck isn’t packing the persist creatures to really abuse him, but allowing my meaty guys to survive a Wrath is pretty cool. He’s also a beating on his own.
Other Spells
Sol Ring, Boros Signet, Orzhov Signet, Rakdos Signet, Darksteel Ingot - Mana rocks. Signets over cluestones or keyrunes because they get Kaalia out a turn faster, which their Standard counterparts don’t Lightning Greaves, Swiftfoot Boots - Pretty standard. Greaves is better than Boots because of the lower equip cost, but it’s nice to have redundancy. I typically won’t play Kaalia (except maybe early game if there is very little removal about) without having one of these out first. Sword of Feast and Famine - Very good for this deck. Combos with Charger and Relentless Assault occasionally for LOTS of attacks, but I prefer spreading the love rather than going infinite. The possibility is there, though Sword of War and Peace - Considering most non-Wrath board wipes are red and damage-based, this provides protection to a key creature. The lifegain is pretty nice, too. Quicksilver Amulet - If Kaalia is too expensive, I will end up hard-casting most of my fatties. This takes some of the strain off of my mana requirements. Instant speed is another benefit. Seize the Day, Waves of Aggression, World at War, Savage Beating - Multiple attack steps are very, very fun! With Aurelia, I can get at least three attacks. Savage Beating can win a game on its own, entwined. Aggravated Assault[/card] - This is the one I can reuse most efficiently (unlike Waves, which requires that I have lands in hand) Fervent Charge - Mostly here for flavor reasons, as it is the only non-legendary Oros card, but also because it can get insane if there are multiple attack steps in a turn. Unburial Rites - Believe it or not, this stuff gets dead a lot. Being able to pick them out of my graveyard when it’s convenient for me is nice. Doing it twice a turn (as opposed to Beacon of Unrest) is good too. Syphon Mind - Card draw. I haven’t really focused on this aspect of the deck so far. It definitely isn’t the best card for the price, especially one on one, but in multiplayer (which is what this deck typically plays), it’ll draw me at least three Hallowed Burial, Merciless Eviction, Blasphemous Act - Wraths. I especially like how Hallowed Burial and Eviction get past things like undying and indestructibility, and Eviction’s multiple modes. Act never costs me more than :r:, ever, and sometimes I just want to reset the board. Boros Charm - I have never used this for anything other than indestructibility Rakdos Charm - All of its modes are useful in my opinion Path to Exile, Terminate, Dismember, Mortify, Unmake, Chaos Warp, Oblation - Removal. Chaos Warp and Oblation have the benefit of tucking generals as well. Wear/Tear, Orim's Thunder, Return to Dust - All of these are very versatile disenchant effects. Nice to get rid of an inconvenient O-ring AND someone’s Gilded Lotus! Ghostway - I just added this card, but I’ve seen it in action in another deck. I figure that I’m not playing tokens, so why not? Stranglehold - We've all been in a game where that guy takes seven turns and plays with himself for a half an hour. At least my extra attack steps are for delivering beats only.
Lands
Blackcleave Cliffs, Blood Crypt, Dragonskull Summit, Caves of Koilos, Godless Shrine, Isolated Chapel, Clifftop Retreat, Sacred Foundry, Command Tower - Say it with me: mana fixing! Evolving Wilds, Terramorphic Expanse - Early game, they fix mana. Late game, they activate Ob Nixlis’ landfall more than once a turn is pretty neat Cavern of Souls - Typically on Cleric, as they are probably my most mana-intensive tribe early. Also saves Kaalia from being Spell Crumpled or Hindered Vault of the Archangel - My guys are so fat that the lifegain alone is worth it Hall of the Bandit Lord, Slayers' Stronghold - Haste on Kaalia or anything else is pretty neat Reliquary Tower - I don’t draw a lot of cards, but if there’s a Group Hug player (or someone pretending to be one. I’m onto you guys), it is worth fetching with Weathered Wayfarer Spinerock Knoll - I'm surprised this card is so cheap…I got my copy for free! One swing for Kaalia will activate it, or one swing from someone else at the table even Bojuka Bog - I don’t like running the bouncelands required to really abuse this card, but it is nice to have anyway. Vivid Meadow - To be honest, I got a Russian copy as a gift. This could just as easily be another basic land
6 Mountain, 7 Plains, 5 Swamp[/card] - Basic lands are always nice, especially since most Group Hug players run green to allow us to fetch them!
Wishlist
Sneak Attack - If not for anything else but flavor. It’s pretty spendy though… Sword of Light and Shadow - The recursion is pretty valuable to this deck Scrubland, Badlands, Plateau, Arid Mesa, Marsh Flats, Bloodstained Mire - Since they are just for mana fixing, I don’t see a need for them right now. If I ever get ahold of them, though, you can bet I will play the heck out of them Enlightened Tutor - Most of the key cards in my deck are enchantments or artifacts Legion’s Initiative - Could work well as a second Ghostway or something. Or just make my guys bigger! Kokusho, the Evening Star - I wish he wasn’t so expensive. Kokopuffs would definitely increase my security, life total wise
Other things, when I think of them
Credit where credit is due: I got an idea of how the deck was supposed to run from the primer of 3drinks here and also blueram’s here.
EDH
(paper) Competitive Prime Speaker Zegana - Explosive Ashling
(MODO) Kangee, Aerie Keeper Bird Tribal - Sisters of Stone Death Lady Tribal - Jeleva, Nephalia's Scourge something or another - Isperia Supreme Judge Control
More than any of that, though, Kaalia doesn’t play by the rules. Who pays retail when you could get a creature for free? Not Kaalia, that’s for sure! In addition, Kaalia loves doing that more than once a turn! Multiple attack steps are fine by her! Add in a Sword and everything is pure AWESOME.
Without further ado, here is the decklist:
The Army
1 Mother of Runes
1 Weathered Wayfarer
2 Grand Abolisher
3 Doomed Necromancer
5 Bloodgift Demon
5 Karmic Guide
5 Ob Nixilis, the Fallen
6 Angelic Skirmisher
6 Aurelia, the Warleader
6 Deathless Angel
6 Harvester of Souls
6 Hellkite Charger
6 Hellkite Tyrant
6 Hoard-Smelter Dragon
6 Mikaeus, the Unhallowed
6 Oni of Wild Places
6 Oros, the Avenger
6 Rakdos the Defiler
6 Ryusei, the Falling Star
6 Steel Hellkite
7 Angel of Despair
7 Angel of Serenity
7 Balefire Dragon
7 Gisela, Blade of Goldnight
7 Lord of the Void
7 Rune-Scarred Demon
8 Scourge of Kher Ridges
8 Utvara Hellkite
1 Sol Ring
2 Boros Signet
2 Orzhov Signet
2 Rakdos Signet
2 Lightning Greaves
2 Swiftfoot Boots
3 Darksteel Ingot
3 Sword of Feast and Famine
3 Sword of War and Peace
4 Quicksilver Amulet
The Artillary
1 Path to Exile
2 Boros Charm
2 Terminate
2 Rakdos Charm
3 Chaos Warp
3 Dismember
3 Ghostway
3 Mortify
3 Oblation
3 Unmake
3 Wear/Tear
4 Orim's Thunder
4 Return to Dust
4 Savage Beating
4 Seize the Day
4 Syphon Mind
5 Hallowed Burial
5 Unburial Rites
5 Waves of Aggression
5 World at War
6 Merciless Eviction
9 Blasphemous Act
3 Aggravated Assault
4 Fervent Charge
4 Stranglehold
The Battleground
0 Blackcleave Cliffs
0 Blood Crypt
0 Bojuka Bog
0 Cavern of Souls
0 Caves of Koilos
0 Clifftop Retreat
0 Command Tower
0 Dragonskull Summit
0 Evolving Wilds
0 Godless Shrine
0 Hall of the Bandit Lord
0 Isolated Chapel
0 Reliquary Tower
0 Sacred Foundry
0 Slayers' Stronghold
0 Spinerock Knoll
0 Terramorphic Expanse
0 Vault of the Archangel
0 Vivid Meadow
6 Mountain
7 Plains
5 Swamp
Card Choices
Kaalia Targets
Karmic Guide - Recursion is good. She’s probably my weakest creature offensively, but the creature she gets back sure won’t be!
Angelic Skirmisher - I won’t usually be cheating her in with Kaalia, but she is relatively cheap to hard-cast. She can give lifelink or vigilance on my turn, and first strike on everyone else’s so I don’t have to worry as much about trading.
Aurelia, the Warleader - Again, I won’t cheat her in with Kaalia’s trigger, as she’s more useful when she attacks on her own. Again, she’s relatively cheap.
Deathless Angel - She will at the very least protect your best guy. As long as they aren’t wearing greaves! Darksteel Plate might be better in this slot, but that is currently in Ashling.
Angel of Despair - Vindicate onnastick. I’m rarely disappointed by this topdeck.
Angel of Serenity - Gets three guys out of the way (bonus: get someone to destroy her while the trigger’s on the stack for a pretty good permanent answer to problem guys) or gets three guys back, or a little of both.
Gisela, Blade of Goldnight - One of the best creatures in the deck. Naturally, one of the biggest targets, too. Don’t drop it until you win the game.
Demons
Bloodgift Demon - Any extra draws off of him are gravy, but I expect him to be removed or stolen, really.
Ob Nixilis, the Fallen - He gets out of hand quickly. Move the Greaves or Boots to him if you can manage it.
Harvester of Souls - If he gets dropped right before a wrath, he has the potential to draw you a great deal of cards (just not off the Rhys player, unfortunately). Remember his trigger!
Oni of Wild Places - Not a bad size, and he has haste. Also, he serves as an Erratic Portal for the next guy…
Rakdos the Defiler - Old Rakdos, Kaalia’s bff. Best saved for someone who draws your ire, so as not to make enemies early on. Don’t hesitate to sac some lands and swing if given the opportunity. Life’s more fun that way!
Lord of the Void - One of the awesome Gatecrash additions to the deck. Swing once, he’s good. Swing twice, you’re probably winning.
Rune-Scarred Demon - Drop him, tutor and cast Savage Beating, gg.
Dragons
Hellkite Charger - Like his buddy Aurelia, he doesn’t like being cheated in as much. Give him Sword of Feast and Famine for giggles.
Hellkite Tyrant - Those are nice mana rocks. Mind if I borrow them? Forever? That’s right, your opponents don’t get their stuff back if they kill him. Seems fair.
Hoard-Smelter Dragon - Typically, I will use him purely for artifact removal. He’s scary enough to some to draw removal, but if he is cheated in, you will typically have enough mana to take something down with him.
Oros, the Avenger - I haven’t had a chance to play him yet, but he is in here for flavor reasons as much as he is here for board-wipe potential. Fun fact: most of the small guys in the deck are white.
Ryusei, the Falling Star - He really wishes he was Kokopuffs, but he is fun nonetheless.
Steel Hellkite - One of the most versatile creatures in the deck. You can pick off a problem permanent, or a horde of tokens. He is a pretty big removal target.
Balefire Dragon - Targeted wrath? Don’t mind if I do!
Scourge of Kher Ridges - I haven’t had a chance to use him yet, but his flexibility makes him a really attractive member of the team.
Utvara Hellkite - His ability is activated by dragons. This deck plays dragons. No brainer, really (but his ability isn’t triggered by Kaalia-aided attacks, unfortunately)
Mother of Runes - Rarely ever lives long enough to do her job well, but she draws removal pretty handily and can easily result in a 2-for-1. Also c’mon, she’s MOM
Weathered Wayfarer - I have loved this guy twice as much ever since I found out he was a Human Soldier Cleric. Like Mom, he typically doesn’t stick around long, but that is typically long enough to at least grab a Reliquary Tower if I need one. Also a mini-beatstick if the rest of your opponents are mana-screwed.
Grand Abolisher - Counterspells? No thanks! A bit of a nostalgia factor here as well, but he can also get rid of a piece of removal early game… not on my turn, of course~
Doomed Necromancer - Honestly haven’t used him yet, but I like him enough to include him anyway.
Mikaeus, the Unhallowed - This deck isn’t packing the persist creatures to really abuse him, but allowing my meaty guys to survive a Wrath is pretty cool. He’s also a beating on his own.
Lightning Greaves, Swiftfoot Boots - Pretty standard. Greaves is better than Boots because of the lower equip cost, but it’s nice to have redundancy. I typically won’t play Kaalia (except maybe early game if there is very little removal about) without having one of these out first.
Sword of Feast and Famine - Very good for this deck. Combos with Charger and Relentless Assault occasionally for LOTS of attacks, but I prefer spreading the love rather than going infinite. The possibility is there, though
Sword of War and Peace - Considering most non-Wrath board wipes are red and damage-based, this provides protection to a key creature. The lifegain is pretty nice, too.
Quicksilver Amulet - If Kaalia is too expensive, I will end up hard-casting most of my fatties. This takes some of the strain off of my mana requirements. Instant speed is another benefit.
Seize the Day, Waves of Aggression, World at War, Savage Beating - Multiple attack steps are very, very fun! With Aurelia, I can get at least three attacks. Savage Beating can win a game on its own, entwined.
Aggravated Assault[/card] - This is the one I can reuse most efficiently (unlike Waves, which requires that I have lands in hand)
Fervent Charge - Mostly here for flavor reasons, as it is the only non-legendary Oros card, but also because it can get insane if there are multiple attack steps in a turn.
Unburial Rites - Believe it or not, this stuff gets dead a lot. Being able to pick them out of my graveyard when it’s convenient for me is nice. Doing it twice a turn (as opposed to Beacon of Unrest) is good too.
Syphon Mind - Card draw. I haven’t really focused on this aspect of the deck so far. It definitely isn’t the best card for the price, especially one on one, but in multiplayer (which is what this deck typically plays), it’ll draw me at least three
Hallowed Burial, Merciless Eviction, Blasphemous Act - Wraths. I especially like how Hallowed Burial and Eviction get past things like undying and indestructibility, and Eviction’s multiple modes. Act never costs me more than :r:, ever, and sometimes I just want to reset the board.
Boros Charm - I have never used this for anything other than indestructibility
Rakdos Charm - All of its modes are useful in my opinion
Path to Exile, Terminate, Dismember, Mortify, Unmake, Chaos Warp, Oblation - Removal. Chaos Warp and Oblation have the benefit of tucking generals as well.
Wear/Tear, Orim's Thunder, Return to Dust - All of these are very versatile disenchant effects. Nice to get rid of an inconvenient O-ring AND someone’s Gilded Lotus!
Ghostway - I just added this card, but I’ve seen it in action in another deck. I figure that I’m not playing tokens, so why not?
Stranglehold - We've all been in a game where that guy takes seven turns and plays with himself for a half an hour. At least my extra attack steps are for delivering beats only.
Evolving Wilds, Terramorphic Expanse - Early game, they fix mana. Late game, they activate Ob Nixlis’ landfall more than once a turn is pretty neat
Cavern of Souls - Typically on Cleric, as they are probably my most mana-intensive tribe early. Also saves Kaalia from being Spell Crumpled or Hindered
Vault of the Archangel - My guys are so fat that the lifegain alone is worth it
Hall of the Bandit Lord, Slayers' Stronghold - Haste on Kaalia or anything else is pretty neat
Reliquary Tower - I don’t draw a lot of cards, but if there’s a Group Hug player (or someone pretending to be one. I’m onto you guys), it is worth fetching with Weathered Wayfarer
Spinerock Knoll - I'm surprised this card is so cheap…I got my copy for free! One swing for Kaalia will activate it, or one swing from someone else at the table even
Bojuka Bog - I don’t like running the bouncelands required to really abuse this card, but it is nice to have anyway.
Vivid Meadow - To be honest, I got a Russian copy as a gift. This could just as easily be another basic land
6 Mountain, 7 Plains, 5 Swamp[/card] - Basic lands are always nice, especially since most Group Hug players run green to allow us to fetch them!
Sword of Light and Shadow - The recursion is pretty valuable to this deck
Scrubland, Badlands, Plateau, Arid Mesa, Marsh Flats, Bloodstained Mire - Since they are just for mana fixing, I don’t see a need for them right now. If I ever get ahold of them, though, you can bet I will play the heck out of them
Enlightened Tutor - Most of the key cards in my deck are enchantments or artifacts
Legion’s Initiative - Could work well as a second Ghostway or something. Or just make my guys bigger!
Kokusho, the Evening Star - I wish he wasn’t so expensive. Kokopuffs would definitely increase my security, life total wise
Other things, when I think of them
Credit where credit is due: I got an idea of how the deck was supposed to run from the primer of 3drinks here and also blueram’s here.
Decks
(paper) Competitive Prime Speaker Zegana - Explosive Ashling
(MODO) Kangee, Aerie Keeper Bird Tribal - Sisters of Stone Death Lady Tribal - Jeleva, Nephalia's Scourge something or another - Isperia Supreme Judge Control
Legacy
Burn
Pauper (MODO)
Mono Black Control
Modern
RW Norin - UWR Control
And my opponent scoops.