I'm not sure where this belonged, I'm probably completely wrong. I sort of took a guess between here and special occasions. Please move it if I'm off.
I just needed to vent.
Just...ugh.
I'm really, really annoyed/upset right now. to the point where I'm probably going to end up swearing, something I've only done once, three years ago. I'm moving. My dad's decided this. At the beginning of July, when I go to the Gaelic College, I'm not coming back. He's been talking about this for ages, but now he's made up his mind. Today, when he told me, he asked if I had anything to say on the matter. I said no. Even if I had said something, it wouldn't have made any difference at all. Every time he's suggested it, I've expressed my dissatisfaction with the idea, but apparently that's irrelevant. He's not going to change his mind. This always happens. We always move. I've never gone to one school for more than two years in a row, you know that? Never. And I've only made it to two, once, at Kelvin. I was hoping I could finish out high school here, but apparently no, that's not a possibility.
As for the reason we're moving, it's just ridiculous. It's because my mom lives in this city. She lives nowhere near us, she doesn't know our phone number, and even though she does know our address, she's not allowed to come within a certain distance of the house unless we invite her. But apparently, her being in the same city is too much for my dad to handle. It's stupid. It's a big city, and the odds of us randomly running into her are tiny.
I wanted to live here, just for another year. After that I would have been happy to go. But no, he has to do it now, because he's too ****ing scared of our mother to stay here any longer.
I hate moving. I hate having to adjust to a new school, a new city, new people. I hate it so much. My dad knows I hate it. Yet we still keep doing it, every year or two. It's so completely illogical. So stupid. He knows it upsets me, I've told him that.
Abd now, for the first time in forever, I have a fairly large group of friends that I hang out with beyond school. All that, gone. For the first time, I have schoolteachers I'm happy with, and I'm involved in courses I like. All that, gone as well. The GSA*? Gone. JAAW^? Gone. Basically everything in my life that offers me any sort of pleasure? It's all. ****ing. gone.
Anyway, I'm sorry for burdening you all with this. I just needed to get it down on paper. Or internet, rather.
i pity you. i had to move last(its almost been a year) summer, and id say it sucked more than having to move every two years. heres why: im not good at making friends, but once im friends with some one, ill hang out with them for years, but my parents expect me to have friends i can show them. as im just newly a teen, and my friends are girls(just friends), id feel rly uncomfortable showing my parents them. I had good friends at my old school, who i would do nything to have here. in ***hole land. land of the redneck-or-gang member-or ****-or outcast. Why is your dad so afraid of your mom? and if you are on friendly relations with her, sould you not live with her for the remaining year? your dad sounds like a paranoid ***:-/ poor you. im not being sarcastic with the pity. moving sux, especially when you have good friends. just fight with ur dad to the point where he gives up. every day, remind him at meals how much you h8 him. keep saying i wish u were dead to him, and dont do nything he tells you to. itll be vengeance for ruining ur life. for more advice, id need to know more of ur family situation. could you give more details?
We live in a country were ~50% of the populace believe public schooling is a socialist conspiracy and that being called Einstein is an insult. We could try and fix it, but unfortunately the other 50% don't believe in euthanasia.
I have to move for the first time this summer, from Boston, Massachussetts to Fayetteville, Arkansas. Big changes. Leaving all my friends and all that. It's different from your story because we are actually moving for a reasonable reason (my dad getting a good job there), but I can kind of understand what you are going through. My sympathies.
Wow, that's an idiotic reason. I moved last summer, but it didn't affect me much because I went to boarding school and had basically no friends where I lived. I'm happier for moving, though, since West Orange is not an exurb so far removed from everything. And since it's closer to New York, I get to spend time there too. But I feel you, buddy.
Yes, it does suck, but telling him I hate him or whatever is untrue and unnecessarily cruel.
hes ruining ur senior year and you dont h8 him?? and the cruelty is the intent. hes ****ing with ur life so u should **** with his. make him suffer as revenge for dragging you around so much. take revenge. and if he does stuff in retaliation, thats what they have child abuse/neglect laws for.
We live in a country were ~50% of the populace believe public schooling is a socialist conspiracy and that being called Einstein is an insult. We could try and fix it, but unfortunately the other 50% don't believe in euthanasia.
Yes, it does suck, but telling him I hate him or whatever is untrue and unnecessarily cruel.
As far as why I can't live with my mom, I haven't seen her since december. She has rather severe problems of her own.
Any one else you can stay with? You are old enough to take care of yourself... Can you just stay by your self? Your dad can visit relatives until you are done with everything. Then he can move anywhere he wants...
Really now. Moving because of some selfish reason like that is really really stupid.
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From what I gather from your description here is that he's never satisfied with staying still. He's the type of person who constantly has to change for fear of being too adjusted. This, in turn, is dragging you into it and therefore ruining every aspect of your most-important stages in life. If your father cannot sit still because of some renegade female, then obviously he's never been involved in harsh relationships that most people tend to go through in their lives, wipe it off, ignore it, and move on. I've gone through something devastating myself which involved a betrayal of someone who I thought had loved me. Did I run away? **** no. I livei n the same city as her and I do not fear once of the chance to run into her. My soul has been fortified by other means and by no means am I afraid of confrontation.
In saying that, I think you need to sit down with your father and have a deep conversation about this. His fear of other matters should not prevent you from having a life. Mind you, I think also too that the reason he's doing this is to prevent you from being exposed to your mother's "Behaviour," as you put it, and "burden" you even further. I sense there was a fall-out between your parents which could have involved you extrinsically. There's a long crevasse of despair on all sides of the field here. Running away from them is not going to mend them, but will continue to close your space and literally landlock you until you are surrounded to move any further.
This movement is about to happen unless someone, mainly you, puts their foot down and takes action now.
If she gives him strife, there are rules. The Canadian laws offer such protection. *I live in Toronto just for reference :); One Canadian to another*
Granted, I think there's something else you're not telling us here. I can feel it.
'buster, the Mystic
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'buster
HR Analyst. Gamer. Activist | Fearless, and forthright | Aggro-control is a mindset. Elspeth and Jhoira rock my world.
Granted, I think there's something else you're not telling us here. I can feel it.
Seconded.
In the US we have something called Emancipated Minor. Once you reach a certain age, 16 I think, you can leave home and support yourself if you declare your emancipation to the courts. this varies from state to state, and I don't know if it's available in Canada at all. The responsibility still lies with you to earn money to support yourself, finish your education, and manage your personal affairs on your own. But at least you can then decide to leave or stay as you saw fit, not because of alimony problems or dysfunctional family dynamics.
Definitely you should go speak with a school counselor or someone besides this messageboard if you want to take the next definitive step. They may be able to help, or may know someone who can help. But the long and short of it is, if you are still a minor and your father is materially supporting you, you are obligated to stay with him even if he moves for reasons you don't agree with.
Well, I definitely don't want to see my mom either, but I feel her living in the same city is not really a problem.
As far as living on my own, it wouldn't work. I'm only fifteen. And even if I were older, I doubt I'm ready for that. I probably will talk to a counsellor, though.
As far as leaving something out, I'm afraid I probably am. You see, I originally posted this on my LiveJournal, and everyone I'm friends with on there knows me personally, so I left out a couple things, like my age. Then, when I copy+pasted it, I didn't think to add them.
I just needed to vent.
Just...ugh.
I'm really, really annoyed/upset right now. to the point where I'm probably going to end up swearing, something I've only done once, three years ago. I'm moving. My dad's decided this. At the beginning of July, when I go to the Gaelic College, I'm not coming back. He's been talking about this for ages, but now he's made up his mind. Today, when he told me, he asked if I had anything to say on the matter. I said no. Even if I had said something, it wouldn't have made any difference at all. Every time he's suggested it, I've expressed my dissatisfaction with the idea, but apparently that's irrelevant. He's not going to change his mind. This always happens. We always move. I've never gone to one school for more than two years in a row, you know that? Never. And I've only made it to two, once, at Kelvin. I was hoping I could finish out high school here, but apparently no, that's not a possibility.
As for the reason we're moving, it's just ridiculous. It's because my mom lives in this city. She lives nowhere near us, she doesn't know our phone number, and even though she does know our address, she's not allowed to come within a certain distance of the house unless we invite her. But apparently, her being in the same city is too much for my dad to handle. It's stupid. It's a big city, and the odds of us randomly running into her are tiny.
I wanted to live here, just for another year. After that I would have been happy to go. But no, he has to do it now, because he's too ****ing scared of our mother to stay here any longer.
I hate moving. I hate having to adjust to a new school, a new city, new people. I hate it so much. My dad knows I hate it. Yet we still keep doing it, every year or two. It's so completely illogical. So stupid. He knows it upsets me, I've told him that.
Abd now, for the first time in forever, I have a fairly large group of friends that I hang out with beyond school. All that, gone. For the first time, I have schoolteachers I'm happy with, and I'm involved in courses I like. All that, gone as well. The GSA*? Gone. JAAW^? Gone. Basically everything in my life that offers me any sort of pleasure? It's all. ****ing. gone.
Anyway, I'm sorry for burdening you all with this. I just needed to get it down on paper. Or internet, rather.
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^-Japanese Anime Association of Winnipeg
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Somehow, I don't think that will help.
I think you are just going to have to deal with it. I know it sucks, but alas, such is life. You have to "move" on.
If he doesn't... well... why can't you live with your mom?
That sucks
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As far as why I can't live with my mom, I haven't seen her since december. She has rather severe problems of her own.
hes ruining ur senior year and you dont h8 him?? and the cruelty is the intent. hes ****ing with ur life so u should **** with his. make him suffer as revenge for dragging you around so much. take revenge. and if he does stuff in retaliation, thats what they have child abuse/neglect laws for.
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Any one else you can stay with? You are old enough to take care of yourself... Can you just stay by your self? Your dad can visit relatives until you are done with everything. Then he can move anywhere he wants...
Really now. Moving because of some selfish reason like that is really really stupid.
From what I gather from your description here is that he's never satisfied with staying still. He's the type of person who constantly has to change for fear of being too adjusted. This, in turn, is dragging you into it and therefore ruining every aspect of your most-important stages in life. If your father cannot sit still because of some renegade female, then obviously he's never been involved in harsh relationships that most people tend to go through in their lives, wipe it off, ignore it, and move on. I've gone through something devastating myself which involved a betrayal of someone who I thought had loved me. Did I run away? **** no. I livei n the same city as her and I do not fear once of the chance to run into her. My soul has been fortified by other means and by no means am I afraid of confrontation.
In saying that, I think you need to sit down with your father and have a deep conversation about this. His fear of other matters should not prevent you from having a life. Mind you, I think also too that the reason he's doing this is to prevent you from being exposed to your mother's "Behaviour," as you put it, and "burden" you even further. I sense there was a fall-out between your parents which could have involved you extrinsically. There's a long crevasse of despair on all sides of the field here. Running away from them is not going to mend them, but will continue to close your space and literally landlock you until you are surrounded to move any further.
This movement is about to happen unless someone, mainly you, puts their foot down and takes action now.
If she gives him strife, there are rules. The Canadian laws offer such protection. *I live in Toronto just for reference :); One Canadian to another*
Granted, I think there's something else you're not telling us here. I can feel it.
'buster, the Mystic
HR Analyst. Gamer. Activist | Fearless, and forthright | Aggro-control is a mindset.
Elspeth and Jhoira rock my world.
In the US we have something called Emancipated Minor. Once you reach a certain age, 16 I think, you can leave home and support yourself if you declare your emancipation to the courts. this varies from state to state, and I don't know if it's available in Canada at all. The responsibility still lies with you to earn money to support yourself, finish your education, and manage your personal affairs on your own. But at least you can then decide to leave or stay as you saw fit, not because of alimony problems or dysfunctional family dynamics.
Definitely you should go speak with a school counselor or someone besides this messageboard if you want to take the next definitive step. They may be able to help, or may know someone who can help. But the long and short of it is, if you are still a minor and your father is materially supporting you, you are obligated to stay with him even if he moves for reasons you don't agree with.
As far as living on my own, it wouldn't work. I'm only fifteen. And even if I were older, I doubt I'm ready for that. I probably will talk to a counsellor, though.
As far as leaving something out, I'm afraid I probably am. You see, I originally posted this on my LiveJournal, and everyone I'm friends with on there knows me personally, so I left out a couple things, like my age. Then, when I copy+pasted it, I didn't think to add them.
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