Girl wants me to go to church with her

  • #1
    So i was hanging out with the girl I really like last night, and near the end she asked me if I would start going to church with her.

    I'm not very religous, but i promised her I would go with her, as I'm not very stubborn and i enjoy spending time with her. (she is 18 freshman in college, I'm 17 senior in high school)

    Im not asking if i should go, because I already decided that I will.

    I want opinions on why she asked me.

    I'm pretty sure she knows I like her, because Ive made it pretty obvious.

    As always, thanks for any advice in advance. You guys are always great!

    Edit: I thought this was going into Real Life advice. Mods feel free to move it. My bad!
    Last edited by gemuadrken: 11/10/2011 8:20:04 AM
    Currently playing:

    Standard:
    UControlW
    RBig RedR

    EDH:
    UWGRafiq, the ManyUWG
    GRWMayael the AnimaGRW
  • #2
    Quote from gemuadrken
    I want opinions on why she asked me.


    I would wager two things:

    1. she likes you! and, because of that:
    2. she wants you to share a part of her life that is important for/to her

    Not necessarily share in the sense of "you should start coming here with me every week" at this point in the relationship, but share in maybe the same way you would teach her to play Magic or something - not that I'm comparing the two, rather that it is something that she's passionate about and wants you to see/understand/experience even this very personal part of her life.

    The explosion that... destroyed our city, razed our home, and turned our fields into wasteland was nothing compared to what was now happening to those who survived.

  • #3
    Quote from gemuadrken
    So i was hanging out with the girl I really like last night, and near the end she asked me if I would start going to church with her.
    It's not much info.
    I want opinions on why she asked me.
    I daresay you're important enough for her to bring you to something that is important to her. I suppose there is the potential for romance too.

    It could be read that she's not bringing you to church but she's trying to bring God to you. I suppose this depends on how faithful or pious she is and how you guys are.
    I'm pretty sure she knows I like her, because Ive made it pretty obvious.
    Does she like you?

    Also, how obvious have you made the fact that you like her? It's a completely different thing if you explicitly make it obvious, say, by saying it or writing it.
  • #4
    Quote from gemuadrken
    I want opinions on why she asked me.


    Because she wants to hang out with you.

    Quote from gemuadrken
    I'm pretty sure she knows I like her, because Ive made it pretty obvious.


    How did you make it obvious?
    "For small creatures such as we the vastness is bearable only through love." --Carl Sagan
  • #5
    I suppose I dont know how i've made it obvious, but I really feel like I have. But i guess its possibke that I havent quite made it THAT obvious.

    I really dont know i she likes me. She told me abou how all of her other guy friends at school are just friends. I'm pretty sure she was tryin to get me to tell her that I like her last night, due to a lot of questions about if i loved anybody, things like that. She told me about when she wants to get married and when she wants to have kids, and that she doesnt want short term relationships, and looks for long term relationships, which i told her I agreed with.

    Ive never had a girlfriend, or even kissed a girl. she has never had a boyfriend, or been asked out on dates, and how she hasnt kissed a guy in about 4 years.

    [lol typos all over. sorry. typing on ipod isnt as easy]

    I dont know if any of this info is useful in interpreting her actions, so it may be somewhat of a ramble.
    Last edited by gemuadrken: 11/10/2011 11:42:45 AM
    Currently playing:

    Standard:
    UControlW
    RBig RedR

    EDH:
    UWGRafiq, the ManyUWG
    GRWMayael the AnimaGRW
  • #6
    Quote from gemuadrken

    I dont know if any of this info is useful in interpreting her actions


    Why are you asking us to do this? Shouldn't you ask her? Either way you're better off.
    Please abide by all rules and regulations of MTGS its parent and its affiliates. Malicious activity will result in termination of your account. Do not smoke fake weed. Refrain from trolling the staff and/or its sponsored trolls. This may result in your suspension or account termination. Do not reveal the location of Senior Staff members. Do not purchase Big Gulps outside of Manhattan to bring them there. Do not purchase Kinder Surprise eggs. Offer expires after 40 days. Cursing Annorax optional.
  • #7
    Because I like her too much to ask her yet. I lack experience with women, and If i have a chance with her, I dont want to screw it up.

    You guys have a lot more experience with woman than I do.

    I dont want to scare her away...
    Currently playing:

    Standard:
    UControlW
    RBig RedR

    EDH:
    UWGRafiq, the ManyUWG
    GRWMayael the AnimaGRW
  • #8
    So why are you stressing out about this? The girl spent time with you and asked you to go to church with her. From the questions she asked she's obviously interested in fermenting a long-term relationship.

    If you like her, and enjoy going to church with her and dating her, there's nothing to worry about.

    You know how you don't scare women away? Learn to relax and be yourself. That's all there is too it. If you two fit and work together everything else will happen naturally in time.
    Legacy Decks
    ~~~~~~~~~
    Too many to list efficiently. Find me online with the same SN if you want to play, or message me here to set up a time to play.

    Modern
    ~~~~~~~~~
    Whatever pile of 75 I throw together the night before without testing. Usually: :symb::symu::symg:
  • #9
    Quote from gemuadrken
    Because I like her too much to ask her...

    Does not compute.

    Either just hang out with her for a while and be happy about it (in other words, relax) and just let the relationship grow over time. Alternatively, just go ahead and tell her out you feel, then relax. You'll have to tell her eventually unless you want to regret it forever, and though there's really no need to rush it you may as well just get it over with.

    Good luck!
  • #10
    While it's wise to look before you leap, this is unapplied, pointless speculation and over-thinking.
    If you want to hang out with her, do so.
    If you want to tell her how you feel but can't, maybe out of fear or something, try to do so. I don't wanna rag on you but some guys aren't worthless but they aren't worthwhile, no thanks to, to no small part, their being too busy by living up in their head and their inability to wear their hearts on their sleeves, so to speak.
    Quote from gemuadrken
    Because I like her too much to ask her yet. I lack experience with women, and If i have a chance with her, I dont want to screw it up.

    You guys have a lot more experience with woman than I do.

    I dont want to scare her away...
    That's rather presumptuous if I were to be honest.

    In general, people aren't turned on, not even in a non-sexual manner, by doubt, fear, and insecurity. Chillax.
    Quote from gemuadrken
    I suppose I dont know how i've made it obvious, but I really feel like I have. But i guess its possibke that I havent quite made it THAT obvious.
    You probably should tell her but don't hold me accountable if things don't necessarily go as planned or desired. :p
    I really dont know i she likes me. She told me abou how all of her other guy friends at school are just friends. I'm pretty sure she was tryin to get me to tell her that I like her last night, due to a lot of questions about if i loved anybody, things like that.
    Imperfect information; sic vita est.
    She told me about when she wants to get married and when she wants to have kids, and that she doesnt want short term relationships, and looks for long term relationships, which i told her I agreed with.
    Jesus, I think she talks too much and/or she likes you and/or has little sense of propriety.

    Unless she's "friend-zoned" you, she's interested in you, or less common things, it seems out of place to talk about these things.
    Ive never had a girlfriend, or even kissed a girl. she has never had a boyfriend, or been asked out on dates, and how she hasnt kissed a guy in about 4 years.
    How innocent! Redface
    Not sure what your road signs say but we have "Danger Ahead!". To be less pessimistic, I'll say that it's potentially, and nebulously, dangerous. Without previously done things, and done wrong things, I am uncertain if you can avoid disappointments, pitfalls, and hurt/hurting that most mortals suffer (some items were a match made in Heaven and don't seem to suffer anything).
  • #11
    Quote from gemuadrken
    So i was hanging out with the girl I really like last night, and near the end she asked me if I would start going to church with her.

    I'm not very religous, but i promised her I would go with her, as I'm not very stubborn and i enjoy spending time with her. (she is 18 freshman in college, I'm 17 senior in high school)

    Im not asking if i should go, because I already decided that I will.

    I want opinions on why she asked me.


    Church is a place of social gathering, she wants to be socially gathering with you?
    Quote from TheInfamousBearAssassin »
    Should I really care what some emotionally ******** emo kid, Johnny the Homocidal Maniac wannabe thinks about any issue related to morality or life in general? You're part of the problems we talk about.

    Quote from Blinking Spirit
    You're describing the existentialist movement that appeared after the end of the First World War.

    The proper response to which is, "Get your **** together, you big baby. You don't like it, do something about it."

    Quote from ElricJC »
    But life is too short for cheap beer.
  • #12
    Perhaps the other side of the coin.
    Quote from Highroller
    Church is a place of social gathering, she wants to be socially gathering with you?
    Church; a place, a service, a congregation; an organisation or religion. To me, it expressly refers to a congregation and, aside from the occasional use of the 4th definition, nothing else, and the place of worship is but a meeting hall, chapel, or anything but "church" itself.
    Although church services and the building of worship may have become a place for collective worship and fellowship with brothers and sisters in faith, services and the building are dedicated to God and should, as such, be solely for the fitting and proper worship of God, to seek God, to understand the Word of God, to glorify God, to walk as Jesus would (presumably, the church is some sort of Christian church).


    Your response is perfectly valid and I'm likely to be responding, albeit in a delayed manner, to the concept of inviting people to church for things that can be done but aren't necessarily good.


    Edit: To that end, I hypothesise that maybe services have become boring and she's in need of something to smooth the sermons over or something else to think about. That might be a leading-on but it's unlikely.
    Last edited by 9909: 11/10/2011 5:24:43 PM
  • #13
    She gets 10% commission on any offerings donated by people she brings. Wink

    A part of going to church is spreading the gospel of Jesus Christ. She could be trying to recruit you.
  • #14
    Quote from Ball Lightning
    She gets 10% commission on any offerings donated by people she brings. Wink

    A part of going to church is spreading the gospel of Jesus Christ. She could be trying to recruit you.


    That's a pyramid scheme, and I'm pretty sure the OP is in America, not Egypt.

    *Pauses for applause, to stunned silence and facepalms*

    Annnyway, I think you have a shot. But be yourself, honestly. I'm probably one of the worst in the world for Over-analysing everything (lucky me, my girlfriend likes it and does it too!), but it generally does more harm than good. Just relax, let things happen, then tell her how you feel. Don't leave signs, or "make it obvious". Just say the damn words. It's hard, but either you save yourself a long time of dreaming, followed by heartbreak, or you start going out with her. But from what you're saying, I think you have a better shot at going out with her! Wink *Thumbs up*
  • #15
    few girls would ask you to go with her to the church. obviously, she's not a standard girl. if have 3 hypothesis, and they are not exclusive. in fact, it is probably more than one of those.
    1- she wants you to be constant part f her life
    2- she wants to share her beliefs with you
    3- she wants feedback from you. she wants to know if you would like to be with her. i said this because it is pretty easy to say that you have anotehr beliefs to avoid the church, so this would be a good test. it worked, actually XD

    The thing I'm sure about is that this is no bad sign. Good for you Wink
  • #16
    Are you prepared to possibly convert to her religion to continue your relationship? I ask this because I grew up in a town that was ninety percent Mormon and if a girl asked you to go to church it basically meant that if things were going to proceed, you were going to convert. I don't know if this has any bearing on your life, but some people will not date outside their religion.
  • #17
    Quote from Mobo
    That's a pyramid scheme, and I'm pretty sure the OP is in America, not Egypt.

    *Pauses for applause, to stunned silence and facepalms*


    I actually laughed out loud for 2-3 seconds.

    ...

    To the OP, at a cursory glance I would say that she likes you, but I don't quite understand her logic. If she wants a long-term relationship I'm not sure targeting a guy who's most likely going to end up at a totally different college in a few months is the right call.

    So then, are you planning on going to college? The same one as her? Skip college completely and work? Because unless you're going to the same college, it's going to be hard to make the time to see each other. Plus you have the proximity rule working against you. She's going to see guys all over the place at college, and inevitably at least one of them will be spending much more time with her than you.

    Also, don't decide the next four years of your life, and possibly your future based on one girl you happen to like. I think that love at first sight is totally asinine. But, I digress.

    Advice: It's obvious she's interested in you one way or another. Either she wants to get to know you better, or thinks you need some religious inspiration. So go to church with her, and decide from there which is more likely. What's the worst that can happen? Waste a few hours and lose a few bucks in the basket thing they pass around?

    After typing this I forgot what your original question was. Oh well.
    My apologies, children, for I am afraid I cannot save you all.

    Commander Decks
    URG Animar, Soul of Elements
    UB Grimgrin, Corpse-Born

  • #18
    Quote from Darklich528

    If she wants a long-term relationship I'm not sure targeting a guy who's most likely going to end up at a totally different college in a few months is the right call.

    So then, are you planning on going to college? The same one as her? Skip college completely and work? Because unless you're going to the same college, it's going to be hard to make the time to see each other. Plus you have the proximity rule working against you. She's going to see guys all over the place at college, and inevitably at least one of them will be spending much more time with her than you.



    She currently lives on campus 10-15 minutes away from my house, and where she lives is only about 2 minutes away (all driving). Honestly, i'm not quite sure why she lives on campus. I'll try to convince her to move home...

    If i do start dating her, I may very well go to her college. If not, i'll probably live at home and go to community college then transfer to the university of Minnesota school of business, but I will still live at home.

    Anyways...i'm going to see her soon. she forgot her boots in my car so i'm going to go bring them back to her.
    Currently playing:

    Standard:
    UControlW
    RBig RedR

    EDH:
    UWGRafiq, the ManyUWG
    GRWMayael the AnimaGRW
  • #19
    Quote from havesome2
    Are you prepared to possibly convert to her religion to continue your relationship?


    Yeah. i'm not very stubborn.
    Currently playing:

    Standard:
    UControlW
    RBig RedR

    EDH:
    UWGRafiq, the ManyUWG
    GRWMayael the AnimaGRW
  • #20
    Her asking you to go to church with her is a big thing.
    Plus it is a sort of test as well.

    1. She is wanting to share something that is important to her more so on a spiritual level whether you believe it or not. She wants you to see this part of her life because it is important for her to share that with you.

    This is a good thing. I doubt she would ask anyone to go if she wasn't to serious.

    2. Most of her friends probably attend there as well and you have to pass the sniff test as i call it.

    more than likely they are going to want to know why are you interested in her.

    the fact that she opened up to you what kind of relationship that she wants is important as well. She is testing your bounderies. probably of which partly derive from her belief structure.

    Are you prepared to possibly convert to her religion to continue your relationship?


    very few christain religions require you to convert. convertion is mostly for marriage anyway, but again that is just a few.

    catholic, mormon are about the only 2 that i know of under the christain catagory (if you consider mormon christain some do some don't different thread). baptist, methodists, etc ... there is no convertion.

    She sounds like a good women to be going out with. don't blow it by doing something stupid. you are both young and have tons of time so just play it by ear and enjoy your time with her.

    you will do much better in the long run once you build a base and foundation.


    Thanks to Epic Graphics the best around.
    Thanks to Nex3 for the avatar visit ye old sig and avatar forum
  • #21
    If someone is religious and goes to church often, he wants a person which he or she enjoys to be with to accompany him or her, it's that simple for me. It's like I'm playin' magic at FNM, so sometimes my girlfriend comes with me, even if she doesn't play herself (at FNM's only :P)
  • #22
    I would agree that it means she wants to get to know you more and/or share an important aspect of her life with you, but truthfully it can mean a lot of things. A few of my male friends have invited me to church before too (I'm a dude). Being an atheist, I view it as just a friendly overture that means you're worth enough to the asker to be invited. It's a good sign, just don't look too much into it.

    Personally, I think you should go, if you have no strong inclination against religion or anything like that. It's an interesting experience and you do get to spend time with her, as mentioned. Just don't (falsely) convert just because you think it'll score points in her book.

  • #23
    aaah that is beautiful. Now just do not ruin it by copping a feel before communion. That would be bad form.


    Insert witty phrase here
  • #24
    Quote from ein
    1. she likes you! and, because of that:
    2. she wants you to share a part of her life that is important for/to her


    This is true, but she probably wants to know you believe the same thing she does before she starts going out with you. To some people having a partner that believes the same thing is really important.

    Your beliefs are part of who you are, and she is testing you to see if you are right. Go through with it and be nice and things will probably work out okay Smile
    Quote from Woohah
    Green - Imagine hippies, except they're all the Hulk.

    Pretty much sums up why I like green so much Smile

    On the internet, everywhere is Soviet Russia[/QUOTE]
  • #25
    Bro, don't sweat it, you are doing fine. She's hanging out with you, she invited you to go to church with her, etc etc. After all, she could of not asked you to go to church with her? She could of said no all of those times you guys hung out, so obviously, this girl wants to spend time with you. At this point, yup, she likes you, it's your job not to mess it up. About the college thing, let her do her thing and you should too. Your only 17, don't hold yourself back just because of a girl, if you have a chance to go to a better college somewhere else, do it.
    winning isnt everything, it's the only thing

    Caw-Blade by Me!
    Format: Standard - NPH
    Location: 2011 MMS Qualifier - Minneapolis, MN (6/4)
    Players: 99
    Finished: 2nd Place

    TRADE THREAD

    http://forums.mtgsalvation.com/showthread.php?t=347708
  • To post a comment, please or register a new account.
Posts Quoted:
Reply
Clear All Quotes