Wow, **** this. Bolas as an old fogey? He's so old that planeswalking is considered strenuous for him now? "Master, don't tax yourself!" God ****it this is Nicol ****ing Bolas! ARGH!
And there's a continuity error on the first ****ing page!
20,000 years? Agents of Artifice said he was 25,000 years old. That's a new record!
Bolas' dialogue sucks. McGough and Marnell made him an elegant yet narcissistic yet cunning powerhouse. Bolas now screams out dialogue like "Bring in the ... visitors."
Also, Bolas doesn't kill people for effect. Nor did good writers. You don't show off Evil McBadguy's evilness by having him kill one of his siblings. That just shows that he's petty and foolish, two things that shouldn't even exist in the same sentence as "Nicol" and "Bolas". And of course he threatens to do the same to Malfegor. Nice to see two cliches in the first two pages.
Oh, look: Three. Now the thing I'd really come to fear is going to happen. Bolas' "master plan" is to "eat that there mana" when the Shards collide. The multiverse's premier strategist my ass.
Guys, let's not go into the "first chapter sucks => whole book sucks => Doug Beyer's writing sucks" thing again....immediately.
But to be honest myself, I do not have a good feeling (and great expectations), after reading the chapter. The dialogue and the style is....bland, compared to previous novels.
As I have said before, writing flavor articles is something entirely different than writing a novel... let's hope that the book will be better than this chapter.
Haha I didn't pick up the continuity error on page one...nice find. We basically can now throw the timeline aside now that they are rewriting it every novel.
edit: I was writing this as you did Caranthir. How should we honestly take this then? It is looking bleak in chapter one Chapter one of AoA was atleast good.
Caranthir, I'm sorry, I truly am. I'm just very, very, very upset about this. I knew something like this was going to happen. Beyer's an unproven writer, and he's handling a character that requires lots of experience. I haven't read Agents of Artifice, but I did read the bits and pieces that had Bolas in them--and Ari Marnell kicked so much ass on those pieces it was amazing. I'd be worried about anyone but McGough handling Bolas, but Marnell did an absolutely wonderful job ("We used to be gods, you know."--sent shivers down my spine, no exageration).
But this? Okay, I'm not going to say anything else today. Sorry if I'm being too negative, but to me it's like having Dan Brown write Gandalf--it doesn't work. That being said, I'm not going to go into a Beyer-speech. If anything, this chapter proves that the parts of the novel without Bolas have to be better than this.
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Caranthir, I'm sorry, I truly am. I'm just very, very, very upset about this. I knew something like this was going to happen. Beyer's an unproven writer, and he's handling a character that requires lots of experience. I haven't read Agents of Artifice, but I did read the bits and pieces that had Bolas in them--and Ari Marnell kicked so much ass on those pieces it was amazing. I'd be worried about anyone but McGough handling Bolas, but Marnell did an absolutely wonderful job ("We used to be gods, you know."--sent shivers down my spine, no exageration).
But this? Okay, I'm not going to say anything else today. Sorry if I'm being too negative, but to me it's like having Dan Brown write Gandalf--it doesn't work. That being said, I'm not going to go into a Beyer-speech. If anything, this chapter proves that the parts of the novel without Bolas have to be better than this.
Yeah, Eid....as I have said above, I do not have a good feeling of this myself.
What I meant and what I would like from everybody (myself included) to wait (with the full criticism) the six weeks until the novel is released.
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Ugh... I have to agree with Eid here. This entry is uninspiring to say the least. I'll try not to be negative, but honestly, the character of Bolas is ANYTHING but proper for the most powerful being in the multiverse, and he who promised to be the most interesting character in the book.
Even without changing the script, on which I'll reserve my opinion... This excerpt would have been much more interesting if the autor had used the simple narrative device of telling it from the point of view of one of the two humans. I'll try not to project my opinion of this page on the rest of the book, but so far it's not exciting. At all.
For me, Doug Beyer's entries on Savour the Flavour at wizard's site have been my only experience so far with him. Disapointing to say the least. Especially today's: http://www.wizards.com/Magic/Magazine/Article.aspx?x=mtg/daily/stf/31
It just feels...I don't know. Bleh. I'm no expert on sentence structures or anything, but a lot of time I felt the writing was...awkward. Poor pacing, uninspired... Just read it over again; I'm not reading his book..I'll get the plot synopsis on the forums.
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"I only steal because my dear old family needs the money to live!"
"Liar!"
"I only steal because this wicked world won't let me work an honest trade!"
"LIAR!"
"I only steal because I've temporarily fallen in with bad company."
"LIAR!"
"I only steal because it's heaps of fun!"
"BASTARD!"
that excerpt definitely doesn't grab my attention at all. just makes me roll my eyes and think 'another typical magic book'. i've been holding out the hope for years that they'd return to the quality they once were...everything just seems so cliche now.
I actually like the part where they exlain Bolas as being old. He is no longer immortal or a being of pure energy and since he is so old his body would start betraying him.
Taking that into consideration Bolas is so power hungry I could see him actually turning more and more into a dragon and letting the rage control him a bit more.
Still it is poorly written so that part is not successful at all. I also agree with LArsen, it would have been more interesting out of one of the witches point of view(they are obviously the witches from AoA we saw in Grixis) or even from Malfegor's eyes.
I also agree with that. I mean, there's a reason why no writer has ever had Bolas as a POV. The only way you can really write an evil-overlord-archetype character as a POV is in satire. ("As he gazed across the bones of those poor wretches driven mad by their desperate need to survive in the ruined ashes of what was once their verdant homeland, his mother called. Again. 'Hi, mom,' he said, angrily kicking the skull of the fools' latest 'hero'. 'No, I didn't forget about gradma's birthday.'")
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I haven't even read the Legends II cycle, but even from what I've read Bolas in Future Sight and AoA, he seems a completely different character. He acts more like Tezzeret (lashing out at his own people, losing his cool, and threatening excessively) than he does himself. Bolas seemed to me to be cold, calculating, and power-hungry. He's ruthless, not psychotic. As I said, I haven't read the Legends II cycle, but it seems like Marmell got it right, or at least it felt right. I can't say the same for Beyer, at least from this excerpt. Bolas seems so much more subtle in his threats. Hell, even when Bolas faced Tezz in AoA, he didn't lose his cool. He set a trap and tried to trick him, but he didn't rage and uselessly threaten him. And also, writing style, POV choice, etc. were disappointing. Maybe it gets better, I really hope it does.
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The "reward" aspect was cliche', it would've been more interesting to have Bolas listen to his point of view. Then again I always preferred bad guys that showed a level of humanity with their evil intentions.
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Once the five worlds of Alara collided, he would have his vitality back. The Multiverse owed him that much -- and it had seen fit to provide him with the five little planes, ripe for the picking. He'd crash their worlds into one another and lick the sap from the wounds. And then, finally, he'd be ready to take his revenge.
So this revenge is geared to who? Or is it what? He can't be thinking of the multiverse, or the Blind Eternities. Would he be going after Teferi. Could this be something Karn saw at the end?
Have these two planeswalkers been mentioned anywhere? Masrath and Tessebik.
Despite the Continuity error I actually like it... Bolas isn't all powerful anymore and it's showing... that's a good thing. If he's losing power it's not really tech to make him seem like that he's still on top of the world. This sample shows us one important thing. Bolas is weakening and he knows it. And that my friends is good writing.
I agree it's nice to finally see a non-godlike Bolas, and I enjoy that as well, but that's not what I mind in the excerpt. It's especially Bolas's irational, short-sighted behavior that ruins my enjoyment of it. Beside the ridiculous mistake with Bolas's age, of course. I still can't figure this out - I would understand if Ari Marmell did such continuity error in AoA because he didn't work with MTG-related materials before, but how could Doug Beyer did such a mistake? Didn't he read either Future Sight or Agents of Artifice?
Well I would think he did, but realize that sometimes these "errors" are simply because one number doesn't get fully grasped by the authors. Sure the "5" doesn't seem like much until you realize thats 5,000. It could be as simple as that, more likely, everyone forgot and didn't do a damned fact check.
***** didn't right the excerpt, or the novel itself. It was (is? is being? it comes out soon, doesn't it?) written by Doug Beyer. I think the only thing ***** has written for Magic was the Flight of the White Cat comic. I could be wrong.
The only positive I can see in Bolas being a fogey now is that it could perhaps be enjoyable seeing his rise back to his former power slowly over the course of several novels/trilogies. That could be interesting. Of course, I see him dying when he is "surprisingly" betrayed by Sarkhan Vol or Malfegor. *sigh* Happy thoughts. I'm still looking forward to this book, strangely enough.
Edit: Yeah, that's weird. Why is the continuity director's first name now edited out of posts?
The only positive I can see in Bolas being a fogey now is that it could perhaps be enjoyable seeing his rise back to his former power slowly over the course of several novels/trilogies. That could be interesting. Of course, I see him dying when he is "surprisingly" betrayed by Sarkhan Vol or Malfegor. *sigh* Happy thoughts. I'm still looking forward to this book, strangely enough.
Edit: Yeah, that's weird. Why is the continuity director's first name now edited out of posts?
- Either Sarkhan, Malfegor, Liliana, Jace or even Tezzeret. I'm not looking forward to the current continuity making Nicol Bolas' stay long although i'd welcome it if wasn't true. They might even be planning an "intriquite hoorah" for him ala-TS.
- I wonder why too, i don't see it sharing any bad meaning in wiktionary. Maybe same person asked for his name to be censored up so that Storyline newcomers won't associate all the mishap the storyline's been experiencing to him. /UBERWILDspeculation
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Tezz, we're not censoring his name on purpose. The forum is doing that. Not sure why, unless it's an attempt to turn the head of creative into He Whose Name Must Not Be Spoken, scion of a thousand torments, scourge of a thousand worlds, eater of a thousand souls, wearer of a thousand little nifty plastic rings that you get from those little candy dispensers that give you the candy that comes with a plastic ring so that you may eat the candy while simultaneously wearing candy made to look like a ring ...
But, yeah, we aren't intentionally censoring *****'s name. Does "*****'s" work?
Edit: No. No, it does not.
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Edit: Br@dy is indeed censored. I typed Br@dy ten times and all i get are asterisks. Although i have to say, if he wants his name not to be affiliated to all the Phail he's been doing he should try harder LAWL.
Edit.2: Maybe it's a left over April Fools thingie?
Make no mistake, I want him to eat Teferi for breakfast. Literally. Garruk can be a midnight snack. One of those bad ones that you know you shouldn't eat, and that doesn't really even taste that great, but you find yourself eating anyway. One of those.
Yes, I can see some "funny" conversations arising by censoring his first name. "Good job with all the hard work, *****. You guys really knocked it out of the park, *****." It kind of makes an honest compliment seem like a sarcastic insult, no? (Not that I'd ever make a sarcastic insult.)
Edit: Does *****walker still work?
Edit 2: Wow. No. And it looks like I'm saying something that I really don't mean to be saying! But I'd be lying if I said that wasn't slightly funny.
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And there's a continuity error on the first ****ing page!
20,000 years? Agents of Artifice said he was 25,000 years old. That's a new record!
Bolas' dialogue sucks. McGough and Marnell made him an elegant yet narcissistic yet cunning powerhouse. Bolas now screams out dialogue like "Bring in the ... visitors."
Also, Bolas doesn't kill people for effect. Nor did good writers. You don't show off Evil McBadguy's evilness by having him kill one of his siblings. That just shows that he's petty and foolish, two things that shouldn't even exist in the same sentence as "Nicol" and "Bolas". And of course he threatens to do the same to Malfegor. Nice to see two cliches in the first two pages.
Oh, look: Three. Now the thing I'd really come to fear is going to happen. Bolas' "master plan" is to "eat that there mana" when the Shards collide. The multiverse's premier strategist my ass.
So incredibly distressed about this.
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But to be honest myself, I do not have a good feeling (and great expectations), after reading the chapter. The dialogue and the style is....bland, compared to previous novels.
As I have said before, writing flavor articles is something entirely different than writing a novel... let's hope that the book will be better than this chapter.
Let this great clan rest in peace (2001-2011)
edit: I was writing this as you did Caranthir. How should we honestly take this then? It is looking bleak in chapter one Chapter one of AoA was atleast good.
But this? Okay, I'm not going to say anything else today. Sorry if I'm being too negative, but to me it's like having Dan Brown write Gandalf--it doesn't work. That being said, I'm not going to go into a Beyer-speech. If anything, this chapter proves that the parts of the novel without Bolas have to be better than this.
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Yeah, Eid....as I have said above, I do not have a good feeling of this myself.
What I meant and what I would like from everybody (myself included) to wait (with the full criticism) the six weeks until the novel is released.
Let this great clan rest in peace (2001-2011)
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Even without changing the script, on which I'll reserve my opinion... This excerpt would have been much more interesting if the autor had used the simple narrative device of telling it from the point of view of one of the two humans. I'll try not to project my opinion of this page on the rest of the book, but so far it's not exciting. At all.
http://www.wizards.com/Magic/Magazine/Article.aspx?x=mtg/daily/stf/31
It just feels...I don't know. Bleh. I'm no expert on sentence structures or anything, but a lot of time I felt the writing was...awkward. Poor pacing, uninspired... Just read it over again; I'm not reading his book..I'll get the plot synopsis on the forums.
"Liar!"
"I only steal because this wicked world won't let me work an honest trade!"
"LIAR!"
"I only steal because I've temporarily fallen in with bad company."
"LIAR!"
"I only steal because it's heaps of fun!"
"BASTARD!"
Taking that into consideration Bolas is so power hungry I could see him actually turning more and more into a dragon and letting the rage control him a bit more.
Still it is poorly written so that part is not successful at all. I also agree with LArsen, it would have been more interesting out of one of the witches point of view(they are obviously the witches from AoA we saw in Grixis) or even from Malfegor's eyes.
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Ambition must be made to counteract ambition.
Individualities may form communities, but it is institutions alone that can create a nation.
Nothing succeeds like the appearance of success.
Here is my principle: Taxes shall be levied according to ability to pay. That is the only American principle.
Agreed. IMO, it's the lowest of villains who resort to killing a minion in order to prove a point.
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So this revenge is geared to who? Or is it what? He can't be thinking of the multiverse, or the Blind Eternities. Would he be going after Teferi. Could this be something Karn saw at the end?
Have these two planeswalkers been mentioned anywhere? Masrath and Tessebik.
They hate us cause they ain't us.
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Well I would think he did, but realize that sometimes these "errors" are simply because one number doesn't get fully grasped by the authors. Sure the "5" doesn't seem like much until you realize thats 5,000. It could be as simple as that, more likely, everyone forgot and didn't do a damned fact check.
The only positive I can see in Bolas being a fogey now is that it could perhaps be enjoyable seeing his rise back to his former power slowly over the course of several novels/trilogies. That could be interesting. Of course, I see him dying when he is "surprisingly" betrayed by Sarkhan Vol or Malfegor. *sigh* Happy thoughts. I'm still looking forward to this book, strangely enough.
Edit: Yeah, that's weird. Why is the continuity director's first name now edited out of posts?
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- Either Sarkhan, Malfegor, Liliana, Jace or even Tezzeret. I'm not looking forward to the current continuity making Nicol Bolas' stay long although i'd welcome it if wasn't true. They might even be planning an "intriquite hoorah" for him ala-TS.
- I wonder why too, i don't see it sharing any bad meaning in wiktionary. Maybe same person asked for his name to be censored up so that Storyline newcomers won't associate all the mishap the storyline's been experiencing to him. /UBERWILDspeculation
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But, yeah, we aren't intentionally censoring *****'s name. Does "*****'s" work?
Edit: No. No, it does not.
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***** ***** ***** ***** ***** ***** ***** ***** ***** *****
Edit: Br@dy is indeed censored. I typed Br@dy ten times and all i get are asterisks. Although i have to say, if he wants his name not to be affiliated to all the Phail he's been doing he should try harder LAWL.
Edit.2: Maybe it's a left over April Fools thingie?
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Yes, I can see some "funny" conversations arising by censoring his first name. "Good job with all the hard work, *****. You guys really knocked it out of the park, *****." It kind of makes an honest compliment seem like a sarcastic insult, no? (Not that I'd ever make a sarcastic insult.)
Edit: Does *****walker still work?
Edit 2: Wow. No. And it looks like I'm saying something that I really don't mean to be saying! But I'd be lying if I said that wasn't slightly funny.
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