MTG Salvation

I wanted to create a forum that had something to do with flavor text. So I guess Ill start.


HALL OF FAME

Fodder cannon
Step 1: Find your cousin.
Step 2: Get your cousin in the cannon.
Step 3: Find another cousin.

Brightstone Ritual
the wizards fought over it to exploit its power.
the goblins fought over it because it was shiny.

Hex
"When killing five just isn't enough"

Incinerate
"I think 'toast' is a better description"

Null Rod
Gerrard: "But it doesn't do anything!"
Hanna: "No—it does nothing."

Remand
"Well, at least all of that arm-waving and arcane babbling you did was impressive."

Obliterate
"The enemy has been destroyed, sir. So have the forest,the city,your palace,your dog..."
-Keldon Soldier

Foul Imp
"the imp, unaware of its own odor, paused to catch its breath..and promptly died"

Skirk Prospector
"I like goblins. They make funny little popping sounds when they die." -Braids, dementia summoner

Reparations
"Sorry I burned down your village. Here's some gold."

Hunted Dragon
"The knights see a mighty quarry. The dragon sees breakfast, lunch and dinner."

Gorilla Titan


"I want a Banana this big!"

Niv-Mizzet, the Firemind
If you turn it sideways the flavor text will say niv-mizzet


Have fun.

i like the bottle gnomes flavor text
reinforcements..........or refreshments

I like Dark Confidant's...."Greatness, at any cost"

I can't remember the name of the card, but the flavor text was "Of course you fight fire with fire. You should fight everything with fire."- Jaya, Task Mage

I have always liked Patrol Hound:
To the camp, it was a fierce and loyal protector. To the sentry's youngest daughter, it would always be her Wuv Muffin.

Other than that, you grabbed the rest of my favorites, including Hex, Reparations, and Foul Imp.

I always liked Root Greevil, just good for a chuckle.

That and Akroma, Angel of Wrath. Good flavor text and a great card.

Skyshroud Poacher has always gave me a good laugh.

Nightmare, 4th edition, gets my vote.

Let's see:

how about:
Scarblade Elite

“Rejoice, eyeblight. In your last hours above the earth, those who bury you will finally make you beautiful."

That, IMHO, is some great flavor text.

Quote from lord_of_obscurity

I can't remember the name of the card, but the flavor text was "Of course you fight fire with fire. You should fight everything with fire."- Jaya, Task Mage

The answer to this the 8th Edition version of Sizzle.

Speaking of which, I nominate all cards with quotes attributed to Jaya Ballard. And here they are: http://ww2.wizards.com/gatherer/index.aspx?term=Jaya%20Ballard&Field_Flavor=on&setfilter=All%20sets

I always liked Hidden Gibbons and Raging Goblin for a laugh.

When these apes want something, it's a matter of gibbon take.
-Hidden Gibbons

He raged at the world, at his family, at his life. But mostly he just raged.
-Raging Goblin

hatred: "i will flay the skin from your flesh, the flesh from your bones, and scrape your bones dry. and still, you wouldn't have suffered enough." -greven il-vec, to gerard

my favorite flavor text from literature...

wasteland: "i will show you fear in a handful of dust." t.s. eliot, the waste land

For literature references, I like the DCI Carnophage:
"And in their blind and unattaining state their miserable lives have sunk so low that they must envy every other fate." - Dante, Inferno, trans. Ciardi

Laughing Hyena

Muffin jokes pwn.

ALso,

Bravado & Lord of the Undead.

Excellent.

'buster

On Lord of the Undead: I think the "my dear" makes that text.

I also REALLY like Sengir's, it's kind of my motto as a black mage:
Empires rise and fall, but evil is eternal.

Everytime I play Congregation at Dawn, I always read the flavor text out loud. It's awesome.

10th edition Arcanis the Omnipotent is sweet.

I really like Break Asunder as well. This is one you really have to 'combine' with the art to have a good appreciation for it.

There are a bunch of others I like that I can't even think of right now...

My favorite is Bronze Bombshell next would be Borborygmos

i love all flavor text of the 5 cards of the Cycle of wishes of judgment

Quote from Masamune

On Lord of the Undead: I think the "my dear" makes that text.

I also REALLY like Sengir's, it's kind of my motto as a black mage:
Empires rise and fall, but evil is eternal.

Hmm, that wasn't the version I was talking about...but I guess I'm glad I did because it's pretty damned decent.

Also like Grandmother Sengir, Shivan Dragon (4th), Royal Assassin (4th) & Gorilla Chieftain (Oh no, not YOU again!)

'buster

"Ach! Hans, Run! It's the Lhurgoyf!"
Saffi Eriksdotter, last words.

wow im surprised no one said Intimidation

"If they move, kill them. In fact, kill one now to make sure the other understands."

i also really enjoy 8th ed Obliterate. Invasion obliterate is kinda sad.
Anurid Brushhopper, the Incarnation cycle in Judgement, Wish Cyle, and Volrath, The Fallen.

Bottomless Pit. For that matter, most of the Weatherlight crew quotes are varying degrees of amusing.

Goblin Ski Patrol

Nuff said

Favorite flavor text? This is tough, but from most recent memory I very much enjoyed Flasfreeze:
"Nature? Fire? Bah! Both are chaotic and difficult to control. Ice is structured, latticed, light as a feather, massive as a glacier. In ice, there is power!" - Heidar, Rimewind master

And also all the cycle of uncommon lands from Coldsnap: Frost Marsh, Boreal Shelf, Arctic Flats, Highland Weald and Tresserhorn Sinks.
I fell in love with the "Dynasty of Winter Kings". Awesome.

Enormous Baloth and The Reaper King.It's a shadowmoor preview.
It's harvest time.
Have to love Tar Pitcher and Tarfire though.
Spitebellows and Gilded Lotus have power.