Myself:
I am 16, I have been playing magic for 4 years, and I came to this store 3 years ago. I feel I have grown a fair amount in that time, and I try and stay a good sport. I was lucky at birth and have some money, and no expenses, being 16. This means I generally am okay with playing things like x4 JtMS in decks. I usually play control or combo. I took a 6 month break from magic recently, getting back in 3-4 months ago. I get along with everyone but this one person.
Him (Lets call him Bob): Bob is in his 40's, a good friend of the store owner, was his best man at the store owners wedding, ect. He seems to have a stable job, and has no issue with playing money cards, typically plays aggro He is usually a good sport, except against me (More on this later) He gets along with everyone but me.
Reasons that I think he dislikes me:
-I have enough money to buy expensive cards
-I am young, usually the youngest at our store
-I play control
-I do better than him consistently
Examples:
Back in Zen/Scars standard, we are playing in a tournament. I am playing UB control, he is playing WW. We have a tough struggle for the first 5 turns or so, then he overextended into a consume the meek. I manage to lock him down with me at 7 life and take him out with a JtMS 5 or 6 turns later. This was game 3. I say gg (And earnestly meant it), and he looks right at me and says "No, it wasn't. You just countered everything". Bob then stands up and walks away, rather pointedly turning his back to me, leaving his deck on the table.
Shards/Zen standard, I am playing WUr planeswalkers, he is playing Quest (A semi-homebrew UW aiming to use quest of the holy relic with memnites and hawks to win the game, while he stalls with JtMS and co. A bunch of us brewed this and he wanted to play it). Game 2, I won game one due to his mana screw. He plays memnite, hawk bouncing memnite, hawk, and I mindbreak trap the memnite, and path the hawk on his next upkeep, playing a tapped land. He scoops up his deck, and says forfeit. Bob then turns to me, and actually rants at me on my character flaws.
His list:
-I interrupt people when they are talking.
This was true at the time, and I appreciate him telling me this. I have since fixed it to the best of my knowledge.
-I don't respect others
Untrue, I return all respect others show me
-I just netdeck
In standard, yes. I am not a really strong deckbuilder solo, but I enjoy creating a good EDH deck as much as the next guy.
-I only win because I buy expensive cards
I don't think so. I buy them as control tends to get pricey, but I like to think I am winning on skill as much as others are.
-I insult others as im winning
To this he was referring to game one where I said gg. It is honestly just an ingrained habit at this point for the end of every game.
Final example for now:
Recently, playing EDH, 4 player table. He walks in and sits down making it a 5 player table. He is playing BR land destruction, I am playing Karthrus dragon tyrant. From a turn 2 sinkhole on my karoo, to a turn 3 stonerain on my dual, to a turn 4 more LD (Forgot which) on my next land, he LD's me all game, until the azami players combo's out and wins on turn 8. He flashes me a lightning bolt and then turns to the rest of the table and says gg. We do another one without him and it is a massive 3 hour game, he gets back from his table at the 2 hour mark, sees that I have a strong board position, and says "This is why I destroyed his lands, he always plays like a douche" and walks off.
I have talked to several others in my store at this point, and he just REALLY dislikes me for some reason. He is not like this to anyone else, and he even seems ok when he doesn't know I'm around. But then I show up and he clams up and throws passive aggressive insults at me...
Sorry for the long post, this has been going on quite a while, and was even the reason I left magic for the 6 months. So... Long story short, does anyone have any ideas for what I should do?
Do you remember how you met this guy? What was the first game you played against him? Might you have left a bad first impression.
Honestly, I'm not sure what to make of this, but I have to say, I'm probably close to your age (pretty newly 16) and it would make me feel extremely uncomfortable as well if I had someone like this in my hobby, and I hope that, at 40, I am not being a passive aggressive douche to a 16 year old.
But yeah, the only thing that I can really think of is that you somehow, probably unintentionally, caused him some great insult when you first met.
Have you and/or other people at the store complained to the owner?
You're not going to magically convince the "douche" to like you. If his behavior is bad enough that you're considering no longer playing at that store, make sure the owner knows this. Get a few friends on board and stage a walkout. Hopefully convincing the owner that his best friend's behavior is hurting his business will get him to tell the guy to shut up.
Also, if the guy is insulting you during a tournament, stop what you're doing and immediately call judge. Regardless of the reason (yes, you are a Mr. Moneybags who netdecks), there should be no toleration of players harassing each other.
Have you and/or other people at the store complained to the owner?
You're not going to magically convince the "douche" to like you. If his behavior is bad enough that you're considering no longer playing at that store, make sure the owner knows this. Get a few friends on board and stage a walkout. Hopefully convincing the owner that his best friend's behavior is hurting his business will get him to tell the guy to shut up.
Also, if the guy is insulting you during a tournament, stop what you're doing and immediately call judge. Regardless of the reason (yes, you are a Mr. Moneybags who netdecks), there should be no toleration of players harassing each other.
Complaining to the store owner won't do much since the guy was the best man at the store owner's wedding. The guy will likely just tell his side of the story and the store owner will of course side with his friend. I'd call him out on it. Fight fire with fire. There's no reason to tolerate that kind of behavior. No guy in his 40s should treat a teenager that way, especially when it appears that you have done nothing wrong. Some people don't like shaking hands with someone after they lose - I get that. But he seems to have gone above and beyond making his dislike for you public. Approach him and say that his remarks and attitude are making you uncomfortable. If he scoffs at it, then it's clearly his problem and I'd be a dick back. Others might disagree with me on this, but f*** him in all honesty. People like that boggle my mind. Best of luck.
Complaining to the store owner won't do much since the guy was the best man at the store owner's wedding. The guy will likely just tell his side of the story and the store owner will of course side with his friend. I'd call him out on it. Fight fire with fire. There's no reason to tolerate that kind of behavior. No guy in his 40s should treat a teenager that way, especially when it appears that you have done nothing wrong. Some people don't like shaking hands with someone after they lose - I get that. But he seems to have gone above and beyond making his dislike for you public. Approach him and say that his remarks and attitude are making you uncomfortable. If he scoffs at it, then it's clearly his problem and I'd be a dick back. Others might disagree with me on this, but f*** him in all honesty. People like that boggle my mind. Best of luck.
Not necessarily. He could just sit there and be blank about the situation if he knows Bob is in the wrong. In either case, you won't gain any real ground here. It shouldn't bother you too much, but if it gets to the point where you just won't go there anymore, then tell the owner as you depart from the store completely and permanently. I'm sure the owner knows of Bob's problem toward you. They're close and he's probably pointed it out to the owner.
It'll be bad business if Bob pushes you out of the store and the owner doesn't try to control the issue. That's money the owner is losing out on, and word of mouth spreads like wild fire. I'd would be a mad owner at my friend killing my income like that.
One final word, you can't change someone's view of you if they just naturally dislike you. Understand it and move on. "You got 99 problems but a ...... aint one!"
His laundry list of excuses as you've typed out are vague enough to suggest that his brain simply decided at some point not to like you. Short of ambushing him after hours and performing a lobotomy with plastic utensils from the KFC across the street, there is very little you can do to change his opinion of you.
More importantly, you have no reason to care what he thinks. His position as friend of the owner is nebulous at best, and aside from ungentlemanly behavior appears to have done nothing overt towards you. I believe it is summed up best by the flavor text on Enfeeblement:
"If it is weak, either kill it or ignore it. Anything else honors it." -Kaervek
You need to realize that he is just a mindless aggro player, and as a fellow control player you need to realize we are better than them. They are stupid and usually really bad magic players so obviously he is going to hate someone so much smarter and better at Magic than he is.
We need to cleanse the world of aggro players.
The only thing I can really think of is if you become close enough friends with other people in the community you won't have the problem anymore because they can defend you and he won't want to pick a fight with a group.
It's unfortunate that your playgroup can't keep games civil and that someone holds grudges between games. I think the best way to fix that is to get enough people to put pressure on him to keep him from attacking one person. I know that if someone I play with started exclusively attacking and destroying lands of one player then everyone else at the table would start berating him. That's extremely uncool to do and it shouldn't be stood for.
I hope you don't let the guy's behavior bother you.
You need to realize that he is just a mindless aggro player, and as a fellow control player you need to realize we are better than them. They are stupid and usually really bad magic players so obviously he is going to hate someone so much smarter and better at Magic than he is.
We need to cleanse the world of aggro players.
I can't tell if you're trolling or not, but I suggest you rethink your statement and understand that control is reactionary and doesn't take as much thinking as the aggro, combo, or mid range player will need to do.
If it were me I'd just do my best to ignore him and not let it get to me. Some people just hate for no good reason and, sadly, often direct it at one specific person. I've seen older players complain about younger ones having lots of big money cards but I personally think that's a stupid complaint. Teens don't generally have bills so of course they have a lot of money to spend on cards.
I'm willing to bet if you call him out on it in front of other people he would back down and maybe have a rational conversation with you (just be polite about it if you do). And if not then at least everyone else will see that it's him and not you.
Ask him not a bunch of strangers on the net. I don't mean to sound like an ass, but confront him and explain yuor observations.
Exactly this. In fact, explain that you were at fault for many things before, and ask him exactly why he has a problem with you now. If you talk about this in a civil tone, especially in front of key witnesses (like the store owner) you are sure to gain more headway in your situation. Don't be aggressive, as that will only exacerbate the problem.
That flavor text really rings true in this situation. As an immature, un-wise 40 year old man, this guy is not going to change his opinion based on anything you say. You could string together the most logical, well thought-out explanation for why his judgment of you is incorrect, and I guarantee he'll still find a way to validate himself.
In this case, you can ignore him completely. Don't even dignify his words with a response. His opinion of you is of no value to you at all.
You could go the other route, and, as they say, kill him with kindness.
Before a tournament just approach him, smile on your face and say something like "Hey man, I don't know if I did anything to piss you off in the past, but I wanted to be sure we're cool." Don't make it overly public, don't make a scene where you're putting him on the spot. Be a better man... he may have the same perception of you, that you're an "arrogant punk kid" or what have you. Shatter that perception and bridge the gap.
Who cares if he likes you. Years ago I had a similar dork whine about me and blue decks. So I honored his retarded attitude by countering most of his spells and casting treachery on what was left. I just laughed as he made snide remarks like counters are for noobs counters suck blue is for weaklings etc. Just beat him all the time and smile politely.
You're 16, and this guy is 40? Really? This 40 year old guy has nothing better to do than defend his "kingdom" from 16 year olds? Frankly, I don't need to know anything else about him. He's a sad, insecure man.
Someone else suggested you ask him if everything is cool in private. I'd suggest otherwise: ask him if there's anything to apologize for IN PUBLIC, and tell him you want to make things right. Do it right after a multiplayer game or something, so that there are plenty of witnesses. If he says everything's cool, then the burden is on you both to show kindness to one another. If he gives you a douchebag response, then everyone sees it. At that point, DON'T respond in hostility. Tell him you're sorry things couldn't be resolved. Then, ignore him.
Of course, with one-sided stories like this, I should tell you that this will only have a potential effect if you have actually been respectful and not a douchebag yourself, regardless of how you've been treated.
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I think you should use a dictionary and look for the word irony
And I thought we Germans were supposed not to understand the concept of irony (well maybe I´m an exception )
@Peperono
I know such people, but just from back in school.
Something unimportants created a spark, (could have been just the first eye contact) he thinks you hate him, and acts accordingly, becaue of that you think he hates you, and even if you two would talk he would still think you are thinking something different then you say.
Thats the worst case
Best thing for you to do is to ask his good friend, the store owner (if he is on good terms with you) why the guy dislikes you.
Don´t ask him to interfere or do something against the behaviour.
Maybe you´ll find out that you once did something totally harmless which created much discomfort for him.
Once a guy hated me, and finally I found out that I once had "stolen" a parking space from right under his nose, and he and his grandma (especially bad for her) had to walk nearly a quarter-half a mile to get to place X because the next free parking space was so far away.
I didn´t do that back then on purpose, I saw a parking space (no disabled or anything, just a normal parking space) and took it really quick because it was in an area where its really hard to get one big enogh for my car back then. I didn´t even notice the other guy or that he had an old woman in the car.
He thought I did it on purpose.
Such things happen all the time, and maybe the situation can be solved.
If talking to the store manager doesn´t help, go to the guy.
When there is nobody else in sight.
(You don´t say anything about violent threats so that sould be ok)
Because sometimes people act because they want to appear a certain way.
Maybe he just needs an enemy to show other guys that he can do all these things and that he has the power.
If no one is in sight, maybe you can talk normally to him.
Sorry that its such a wall of text, thats just some stuff I remember from back in middle school when I was in a sort of "problem/arguments between pupils, solving group".
Nope. A control player will need to play a single counter or a single board wipe and the board will be tipped into their favor. A proactive player will need to figure out if their hand will be able to race their opponent to 0 before that happens, or play just enough creatures to force the control players reset, or counter, just to keep on going after your spell. Other arch types are proactive which requires going around your defenses, while the reactive player just decides whether deny a particular creature or spell.
Preemptive/Proactive action requires a lot of thinking.
1) he is old as hell and he's pretty much a douchebag. He's 40 and you're 16. Even if you were the most obnoxious 16 year old, that other guy is still an idiot b/c by that age, he shouldn't be such a whiny beech.
2) He is best friends w/ the store owner - the store owner who probably doesn't care about you. At my LGS, the owner is not good w/ ppl. If it wasn't for the people that run it day to day, the place would close like 99% of the other MTG shops.
3) You're 16 - a lot of adults don't take kids seriously b/c...they're kids.. With that said you'll realize that in life you're going to meet ppl who flat out don't like you because you wear Reeboks and they like Nike's. Or some other ridiculous reason like that. Its just part of life. Part of getting older is getting thicker skin and learning that you can't please everyone.
I don't run into this IRL too often but if someone starts raging about something i''ll usually call them out on it. Last week a guy at my LGS, who i'm more or less friends with, was bagging on my draft deck after i beat him. The general response he got was "stop losing to bad decks with dumb tricks."
The point of the story is that you may just be wasting your time trying to be friendly with the guy. Just move on and call him out on his BS if and when it comes up.
first rule is always to speak in private first.
Its easy to call somebody out in public, but after that you have locked every other possiblity.
the other way you can talk to him, the store owner, and if that doesnt help you can still ask him in public.
Then I guess we'll agree to disagree, no disrespect intended. I'd like to point out, though, that I made no mention of "calling him out" on his actions. I suggested a public peace offering. Sorry if that was unclear.
The fact that this 40 yr old guy is picking on a 16 yr old tells me that the OP is dealing with more than just some perceived offense that needs to be rectified. I'll bet money that this guy enjoys harassing the OP, and finds some self affirmation out of the public nature of it.
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1.) He's probably annoyed you have more money at 16 than he did at that time. The 99% often aren't fans of the 1%. It's a fact of life, learn to cope.
2.) Why do you really care? Seriously. Not everyone you meet in life will like you. Some will downright despise you. So long as you are a respectful person, it's not your problem if you're not liked...so why bother caring if he likes you or not.
I realize that wanting everyone to like you is a big part of the teenage psyche, but once you realize that not everyone in life will be your best friend it's much easier to deal with this.
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You could go the other route, and, as they say, kill him with kindness.
Before a tournament just approach him, smile on your face and say something like "Hey man, I don't know if I did anything to piss you off in the past, but I wanted to be sure we're cool." Don't make it overly public, don't make a scene where you're putting him on the spot. Be a better man... he may have the same perception of you, that you're an "arrogant punk kid" or what have you. Shatter that perception and bridge the gap.
I have met very few kids your age that aren't obnoxious in some respect or another, but you say you've been working on improving that. Continue to be introspect and work to better yourself.
You're talking about how you're better than him and have more money than him. If you go around acting like that, you're probably not being as respectful as you think you are. You might be coming off as conceited or arrogant.
What do the other people in the store think of this guy? Have you talked to anyone else?
There are some people who play Magic that are just kind of ****ty people. It happens. We have a guy who grumbles a lot, doesn't wear deodorant, and in general is a tremendous pain in the ass to play with. This guy could be one of them.
What seems most interesting in your story is that you haven't mentioned how other people react to this guy. If other people think he's a douchebag or a weirdo or grumpy or whatever, then what he thinks of you is less important. If people do not feel this way, it may be that you in fact bother multiple people, and this guy is the only one who is vocal about it.
Whatever the issue is, the adult thing to do is talk to him about it openly and honestly, privately, and do not get defensive.
Be glad it's this guy and not the store owner that hates you. When I was 16 I played Yu-Gi-Oh and the store owner hated me for several reasons I won't get into now. When the store owner hates you, you get screwed out of prizes at tournaments. I had to stop going to that shop. That was my solution. But since it's not the owner and he doesn't seem to have valid reasons for hating you I guess talking to him about it is the best thing, like others have said.
And there's probably a better than 50% chance that the nameless counterpart is also a member of this forum and will read the original post. So that might clear things up.
Yes, at some point in the past, you probably did things that - intentionally or not - generated animosity between you two. And once you are on that side, some/most people have a hard time letting go.
If you can't ignore it until he's able to move on, then talking to a friend of his or talking to him directly in private would be highly recommended.
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Myself:
I am 16, I have been playing magic for 4 years, and I came to this store 3 years ago. I feel I have grown a fair amount in that time, and I try and stay a good sport. I was lucky at birth and have some money, and no expenses, being 16. This means I generally am okay with playing things like x4 JtMS in decks. I usually play control or combo. I took a 6 month break from magic recently, getting back in 3-4 months ago. I get along with everyone but this one person.
Him (Lets call him Bob): Bob is in his 40's, a good friend of the store owner, was his best man at the store owners wedding, ect. He seems to have a stable job, and has no issue with playing money cards, typically plays aggro He is usually a good sport, except against me (More on this later) He gets along with everyone but me.
Reasons that I think he dislikes me:
-I have enough money to buy expensive cards
-I am young, usually the youngest at our store
-I play control
-I do better than him consistently
Examples:
Back in Zen/Scars standard, we are playing in a tournament. I am playing UB control, he is playing WW. We have a tough struggle for the first 5 turns or so, then he overextended into a consume the meek. I manage to lock him down with me at 7 life and take him out with a JtMS 5 or 6 turns later. This was game 3. I say gg (And earnestly meant it), and he looks right at me and says "No, it wasn't. You just countered everything". Bob then stands up and walks away, rather pointedly turning his back to me, leaving his deck on the table.
Shards/Zen standard, I am playing WUr planeswalkers, he is playing Quest (A semi-homebrew UW aiming to use quest of the holy relic with memnites and hawks to win the game, while he stalls with JtMS and co. A bunch of us brewed this and he wanted to play it). Game 2, I won game one due to his mana screw. He plays memnite, hawk bouncing memnite, hawk, and I mindbreak trap the memnite, and path the hawk on his next upkeep, playing a tapped land. He scoops up his deck, and says forfeit. Bob then turns to me, and actually rants at me on my character flaws.
His list:
-I interrupt people when they are talking.
This was true at the time, and I appreciate him telling me this. I have since fixed it to the best of my knowledge.
-I don't respect others
Untrue, I return all respect others show me
-I just netdeck
In standard, yes. I am not a really strong deckbuilder solo, but I enjoy creating a good EDH deck as much as the next guy.
-I only win because I buy expensive cards
I don't think so. I buy them as control tends to get pricey, but I like to think I am winning on skill as much as others are.
-I insult others as im winning
To this he was referring to game one where I said gg. It is honestly just an ingrained habit at this point for the end of every game.
Final example for now:
Recently, playing EDH, 4 player table. He walks in and sits down making it a 5 player table. He is playing BR land destruction, I am playing Karthrus dragon tyrant. From a turn 2 sinkhole on my karoo, to a turn 3 stonerain on my dual, to a turn 4 more LD (Forgot which) on my next land, he LD's me all game, until the azami players combo's out and wins on turn 8. He flashes me a lightning bolt and then turns to the rest of the table and says gg. We do another one without him and it is a massive 3 hour game, he gets back from his table at the 2 hour mark, sees that I have a strong board position, and says "This is why I destroyed his lands, he always plays like a douche" and walks off.
I have talked to several others in my store at this point, and he just REALLY dislikes me for some reason. He is not like this to anyone else, and he even seems ok when he doesn't know I'm around. But then I show up and he clams up and throws passive aggressive insults at me...
Sorry for the long post, this has been going on quite a while, and was even the reason I left magic for the 6 months. So... Long story short, does anyone have any ideas for what I should do?
Do you remember how you met this guy? What was the first game you played against him? Might you have left a bad first impression.
Honestly, I'm not sure what to make of this, but I have to say, I'm probably close to your age (pretty newly 16) and it would make me feel extremely uncomfortable as well if I had someone like this in my hobby, and I hope that, at 40, I am not being a passive aggressive douche to a 16 year old.
But yeah, the only thing that I can really think of is that you somehow, probably unintentionally, caused him some great insult when you first met.
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You're not going to magically convince the "douche" to like you. If his behavior is bad enough that you're considering no longer playing at that store, make sure the owner knows this. Get a few friends on board and stage a walkout. Hopefully convincing the owner that his best friend's behavior is hurting his business will get him to tell the guy to shut up.
Also, if the guy is insulting you during a tournament, stop what you're doing and immediately call judge. Regardless of the reason (yes, you are a Mr. Moneybags who netdecks), there should be no toleration of players harassing each other.
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Complaining to the store owner won't do much since the guy was the best man at the store owner's wedding. The guy will likely just tell his side of the story and the store owner will of course side with his friend. I'd call him out on it. Fight fire with fire. There's no reason to tolerate that kind of behavior. No guy in his 40s should treat a teenager that way, especially when it appears that you have done nothing wrong. Some people don't like shaking hands with someone after they lose - I get that. But he seems to have gone above and beyond making his dislike for you public. Approach him and say that his remarks and attitude are making you uncomfortable. If he scoffs at it, then it's clearly his problem and I'd be a dick back. Others might disagree with me on this, but f*** him in all honesty. People like that boggle my mind. Best of luck.
Not necessarily. He could just sit there and be blank about the situation if he knows Bob is in the wrong. In either case, you won't gain any real ground here. It shouldn't bother you too much, but if it gets to the point where you just won't go there anymore, then tell the owner as you depart from the store completely and permanently. I'm sure the owner knows of Bob's problem toward you. They're close and he's probably pointed it out to the owner.
It'll be bad business if Bob pushes you out of the store and the owner doesn't try to control the issue. That's money the owner is losing out on, and word of mouth spreads like wild fire. I'd would be a mad owner at my friend killing my income like that.
One final word, you can't change someone's view of you if they just naturally dislike you. Understand it and move on. "You got 99 problems but a ...... aint one!"
More importantly, you have no reason to care what he thinks. His position as friend of the owner is nebulous at best, and aside from ungentlemanly behavior appears to have done nothing overt towards you. I believe it is summed up best by the flavor text on Enfeeblement:
"If it is weak, either kill it or ignore it. Anything else honors it." -Kaervek
I collect pre-release Stone-Tongue Basilisk
We need to cleanse the world of aggro players.
...and that's strike three. Infraction issued.
-Memnarch
It's unfortunate that your playgroup can't keep games civil and that someone holds grudges between games. I think the best way to fix that is to get enough people to put pressure on him to keep him from attacking one person. I know that if someone I play with started exclusively attacking and destroying lands of one player then everyone else at the table would start berating him. That's extremely uncool to do and it shouldn't be stood for.
I hope you don't let the guy's behavior bother you.
I can't tell if you're trolling or not, but I suggest you rethink your statement and understand that control is reactionary and doesn't take as much thinking as the aggro, combo, or mid range player will need to do.
I'm willing to bet if you call him out on it in front of other people he would back down and maybe have a rational conversation with you (just be polite about it if you do). And if not then at least everyone else will see that it's him and not you.
Exactly this. In fact, explain that you were at fault for many things before, and ask him exactly why he has a problem with you now. If you talk about this in a civil tone, especially in front of key witnesses (like the store owner) you are sure to gain more headway in your situation. Don't be aggressive, as that will only exacerbate the problem.
In this case, you can ignore him completely. Don't even dignify his words with a response. His opinion of you is of no value to you at all.
Before a tournament just approach him, smile on your face and say something like "Hey man, I don't know if I did anything to piss you off in the past, but I wanted to be sure we're cool." Don't make it overly public, don't make a scene where you're putting him on the spot. Be a better man... he may have the same perception of you, that you're an "arrogant punk kid" or what have you. Shatter that perception and bridge the gap.
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Lavinia of the Tenth (MTGO)
Someone else suggested you ask him if everything is cool in private. I'd suggest otherwise: ask him if there's anything to apologize for IN PUBLIC, and tell him you want to make things right. Do it right after a multiplayer game or something, so that there are plenty of witnesses. If he says everything's cool, then the burden is on you both to show kindness to one another. If he gives you a douchebag response, then everyone sees it. At that point, DON'T respond in hostility. Tell him you're sorry things couldn't be resolved. Then, ignore him.
Of course, with one-sided stories like this, I should tell you that this will only have a potential effect if you have actually been respectful and not a douchebag yourself, regardless of how you've been treated.
UBW Sharuum
BR Olivia Voldaren
UR Jhoira
URG Riku
U Vendilion Clique
Nope. A control player will need to play a single counter or a single board wipe and the board will be tipped into their favor. A proactive player will need to figure out if their hand will be able to race their opponent to 0 before that happens, or play just enough creatures to force the control players reset, or counter, just to keep on going after your spell. Other arch types are proactive which requires going around your defenses, while the reactive player just decides whether deny a particular creature or spell.
Preemptive/Proactive action requires a lot of thinking.
1) he is old as hell and he's pretty much a douchebag. He's 40 and you're 16. Even if you were the most obnoxious 16 year old, that other guy is still an idiot b/c by that age, he shouldn't be such a whiny beech.
2) He is best friends w/ the store owner - the store owner who probably doesn't care about you. At my LGS, the owner is not good w/ ppl. If it wasn't for the people that run it day to day, the place would close like 99% of the other MTG shops.
3) You're 16 - a lot of adults don't take kids seriously b/c...they're kids.. With that said you'll realize that in life you're going to meet ppl who flat out don't like you because you wear Reeboks and they like Nike's. Or some other ridiculous reason like that. Its just part of life. Part of getting older is getting thicker skin and learning that you can't please everyone.
I don't run into this IRL too often but if someone starts raging about something i''ll usually call them out on it. Last week a guy at my LGS, who i'm more or less friends with, was bagging on my draft deck after i beat him. The general response he got was "stop losing to bad decks with dumb tricks."
The point of the story is that you may just be wasting your time trying to be friendly with the guy. Just move on and call him out on his BS if and when it comes up.
Then I guess we'll agree to disagree, no disrespect intended. I'd like to point out, though, that I made no mention of "calling him out" on his actions. I suggested a public peace offering. Sorry if that was unclear.
The fact that this 40 yr old guy is picking on a 16 yr old tells me that the OP is dealing with more than just some perceived offense that needs to be rectified. I'll bet money that this guy enjoys harassing the OP, and finds some self affirmation out of the public nature of it.
UBW Sharuum
BR Olivia Voldaren
UR Jhoira
URG Riku
U Vendilion Clique
2.) Why do you really care? Seriously. Not everyone you meet in life will like you. Some will downright despise you. So long as you are a respectful person, it's not your problem if you're not liked...so why bother caring if he likes you or not.
I realize that wanting everyone to like you is a big part of the teenage psyche, but once you realize that not everyone in life will be your best friend it's much easier to deal with this.
it may take some time to explain."
Jace Beleren, to Garruk Wildspeaker
i agree. Gandhi stile always seems to work.
I have met very few kids your age that aren't obnoxious in some respect or another, but you say you've been working on improving that. Continue to be introspect and work to better yourself.
You're talking about how you're better than him and have more money than him. If you go around acting like that, you're probably not being as respectful as you think you are. You might be coming off as conceited or arrogant.
What do the other people in the store think of this guy? Have you talked to anyone else?
There are some people who play Magic that are just kind of ****ty people. It happens. We have a guy who grumbles a lot, doesn't wear deodorant, and in general is a tremendous pain in the ass to play with. This guy could be one of them.
What seems most interesting in your story is that you haven't mentioned how other people react to this guy. If other people think he's a douchebag or a weirdo or grumpy or whatever, then what he thinks of you is less important. If people do not feel this way, it may be that you in fact bother multiple people, and this guy is the only one who is vocal about it.
Whatever the issue is, the adult thing to do is talk to him about it openly and honestly, privately, and do not get defensive.
And there's probably a better than 50% chance that the nameless counterpart is also a member of this forum and will read the original post. So that might clear things up.
Yes, at some point in the past, you probably did things that - intentionally or not - generated animosity between you two. And once you are on that side, some/most people have a hard time letting go.
If you can't ignore it until he's able to move on, then talking to a friend of his or talking to him directly in private would be highly recommended.