(This banner based on Rowdy Crew art from Wizards of the Coast)
September MCC Round 2
"You are a Pirate!"
Ixalan. A whole world that waits to be discovered. Ancient ruins from the Sun Empire's heyday can now be found, overgrown and half-buried, in the depths of the jungle. Sacred springs infused with magical power well up from high mountainsides. Hidden coves hold pirate treasures stowed by captains long forgotten. Brave explorers from all four peoples uncover such sites as they scour Ixalan in search of the golden city.
For centuries, the untamed jungles of Ixalan have hidden a coveted secret: Orazca, the city of gold. But no secret can remain undiscovered, and no treasure can be taken uncontested. Unfurl your sails, saddle up a dinosaur, and battle your rivals as you embark on a journey to claim the plane’s greatest fortune for yourself!
Guided by ancient maps, pirates are constantly looking for treasures – and for foes who will make a good food for fishes as well…
Main challenge: Design a colored Pirate creature card.
Subchallenge 1: The card is nongreen, nonwhite.
Subchallenge 2: Your card has Raid mechanic OR/AND your card cares about Treasure tokens.
Main Challenge
The card needs to be a creature. The card also needs to be colored. It should have Pirate creature type. It also may have any other creature types if necessary, but friendly reminder – most known Ixalan pirates are Humans, Goblins, Orcs and Sirens.
Subchallenge 1
Your card should have monoblue, monoblack, monored, blue-black, blue-red, black-red or blue-black-red color identity. It should have one or more colored mana symbols in mana cost and may have any nongreen, nonwhite mana symbols in rules text if necessary.
Subchallenge 2
- If you chose Raid, your card has Raid mechanic printed on it (If you attacked with a creature this turn, "effect"). Examples are Ruin Raider and Storm Fleet Aerialist.
- If you chose Treasure, it cares about colorless Treasure artifact tokens with "t, Sacrifice this artifact: Add one mana of any color to your mana pool". It can create them or somehow interact with them. Captain Lannery Storm and Prosperous Pirates are examples.
- If you chose both, do both.
Plase feel free to ask additional questions if you have any in the MCC Discussion thread.
A friendly reminder bravelion83 left everyone a few months ago but it's still valid:
In the MCC, putting rarity on cards is mandatory! If you don't put a rarity on your card, expect huge deductions in both Viability AND Quality.
Also, you should format your text cards accordingly to the forum rules (see the "this formatting looks best" spoiler in the linked OP). Again, expect deductions in Quality otherwise.
Design - (X/3) Appeal: Do the different player psychographics (Timmy/Johhny/Spike) have a use for the card? (X/3) Elegance: Is the card easily understandable at a glance? Do all the flavor and mechanics combined as a whole make sense? Development - (X/3) Viability: How well does the card fit into the color wheel? Does it break or bend the rules of the game? Is it the appropriate rarity? (X/3) Balance: Does the card have a power level appropriate for contemporary constructed/limited environments without breaking them? Does it play well in casual and multiplayer formats? Does it create or fit into a deck/archetype? Does it create an oppressive environment? Creativity - (X/3) Uniqueness: Has a card like this ever been printed before? Does it use new mechanics, ideas, or design space? Does it combine old ideas in a new way? Overall, does it feel “fresh”? (X/3) Flavor: Does the name seem realistic for a card? Does the flavor text sound professional? Do all the flavor elements synch together to please Vorthos players? Polish - (X/3) Quality: Points deducted for incorrect spelling, grammar, and templating. (X/2) *Main Challenge: Was the main challenge satisfied? Was it approached in a unique or interesting way? Does the card fit the intent of the challenge? (X/2) Subchallenges: One point awarded per satisfied subchallenge condition. Total: X/25
*An entry with 0 points here is subject to disqualification.
DEADLINES Design deadline: Saturday, September 16th 2017 23:59 EDT
Judging deadline: Tuesday, September 19th 2017 23:59 EDT
Dire Fleet Manhunter1B
Creature - Orc Pirate Assassin (R)
Deathtouch 1B, t, Sacrifice a Treasure: Destroy target creature. "They get coin, they get name, they get rid of problem." — Grukko, Dire Fleet Pirate 1/2
Goblin SwabbieR
Creature - Goblin Pirate (Uncommon)
Menace
Whenever Goblin Swabbie deals combat damage to a player, create a colorless Treasure artifact token with "T, Sacrifice this artifact: Add one mana of any color to your mana pool." "Hand over yer booty, landlubber.
No, not yer gold, yer shoes!"
1/2
Rum-Crazed Buccaneer2UR
Creature – Human Pirate (R)
Double strike Raid — When Rum-Crazed Buccaneer enters the battlefield, if you attacked with a creature this turn, discard your hand, then draw that many cards. "A drinking contest, you say? Let's make it a little more interesting."
2/2
Captain Ripley Vance2RR
Legendary Creature - Human Pirate [mythic rare]
Menace
Whenever you cast a red spell, Captain Ripley Vance deals 2 damage to target opponent. Raid — Red spells you cast cost 1 less to cast if you attacked with a creature this turn. "All cannons fire!"
2/3
Shipwreck Salvager2U
Creature - Human Pirate Artificer [U]
Prowess
Treasures you control have "T, Sacrifice this artifact: Add CC to your mana pool. Spend this mana only to cast artifact spells." “Every part of High and Dry used to be a ship. For the right price, it can be again.”
1/2
Relentless SkeletonB
Creature - Skeleton Pirate (U) Raid — When Relentless Skeleton dies, if you attacked with a creature this turn, return it to its owner’s hand. The captain ordered to attack and it just never stopped.
1/1
Multiple instances of lifelink on the same creature are redundant.
Multiple instances of lifelink on the same creature are redundant.
Multiple instances of lifelink on the same creature are redundant.
—Eli Shiffrin, Rules Manager, on a design stacking lifelink instances
Captain Harlock1U
Legendary Creature - Human Pirate [R]
Captain Harlock’s power and toughness are each equal to the number of Treasure artifact tokens you control. “Ooh, shiny!”
*/*
Crew's AdvocateU
Creature - Siren Pirate (U)
Whenever you sacrifice a Treasure for the first time each turn, add C to your mana pool. "The money's good, but you're going to have to sweeten the pot a bit. We are going to need a favor."
1/1
Captain Black Sparrow (Mythic) UBR
Legendary Creature - Bird Pirate
3/2
Flying
Hexproof t: Gain control of target vehicle until end of turn. Untap it. It becomes a creature in addition to its other types and gains haste until end of turn. Activate this ability only at any time you could cast a sorcery.
Dorganta, Captain of Blades2RR
Legendary Creature - Orc Pirate (R)
Dorganta, Captain of Blades has double strike as long as two Equipments are attached to her.
Sacrifice a Treasure: Gain control of target Equipment an opponent controls until end of turn. Attach it to Dorganta. When you lose control of that Equipment, unattach it.
3/3
Passionate GamblerUR
Creature - Human Pirate (Uncommon)
Sacrifice a Treasure or pay 3, t: Flip a coin. If you win the flip, draw a card and create two colorless Treasure artifact tokens with "T, Sacrifice this artifact: Add one mana of any color to your mana pool." "True piracy is the price of rum those today, but enough talking. Up for a little game?"
2/3
Voice of GreedUB
Creature - Siren Pirate {R}
Spend only mana produced by Treasures to cast Voice of Greed.
Flying
Sacrifice a Treasure: Exile Voice of Greed. Return it to the battlefield under its owner's control at the beginning of the next end step.
5/4
Dire Fleet Necromancer3BB
Creature - Orc Pirate Wizard (R) Raid — At the beginning of your end step, if you attacked with a creature this turn, you may choose target creature card in a graveyard that was put there from the battlefield this turn. Put that card onto the battlefield under your control. A fleet that never runs out of crew is a fearsome fleet indeed.
4/3
Captain Ripley Vance2RR
Legendary Creature - Human Pirate [mythic rare]
Menace
Whenever you cast a red spell, Captain Ripley Vance deals 2 damage to target opponent. Raid — Red spells you cast cost 1 less to cast if you attacked with a creature this turn. "All cannons fire!"
2/3
Shipwreck Salvager2U
Creature - Human Pirate Artificer [U]
Prowess
Treasures you control have "T, Sacrifice this artifact: Add CC to your mana pool. Spend this mana only to cast artifact spells." “Every part of High and Dry used to be a ship. For the right price, it can be again.”
1/2
Passionate GamblerUR
Creature - Human Pirate (Uncommon)
Sacrifice a Treasure or pay 3, t: Flip a coin. If you win the flip, draw a card and create two colorless Treasure artifact tokens with "T, Sacrifice this artifact: Add one mana of any color to your mana pool." "True piracy is the price of rum those today, but enough talking. Up for a little game?"
2/3
Captain Dell McAvoy2UR
Legendary Creature — Human Pirate (M) Raid — At the beginning of your end step, if you attacked with a creature this turn, create a colorless Treasure artifact token with "T, Sacrifice this artifact: Add one mana of any color to your mana pool.”, then choose one —
- Gain control of target creature with converted mana cost X or less, where X is the number of artifacts you control.
- Captain Dell McAvoy deals X damage to target creature or player, where X is the number of artifacts you control. “If you won’t listen to the gold, I’ll let the cannons do the talking.”
4/4
Dire Fleet Necromancer3BB
Creature - Orc Pirate Wizard (R) Raid — At the beginning of your end step, if you attacked with a creature this turn, you may choose target creature card in a graveyard that was put there from the battlefield this turn. Put that card onto the battlefield under your control. A fleet that never runs out of crew is a fearsome fleet indeed.
4/3
Design - (2/3) Appeal: Johnny and Spike like, Timmy doesn't care. (3/3) Elegance: Straightforward enough. Development - (2.5/3) Viability: Definitely fine color pie wise, though I think this'd be more appropriate at rare. (2/3) Balance: On the weak side for a Spikey mythic, no immediate board impact on an easily removable body and the untap effect (whether through combat or its abilities) doesn't do enough to justify. Creativity - (2.5/3) Uniqueness: Damage off spell casts has been done a few times before (Balefire Liege, flip Chandra plays in the same space), but the tacked on cost reduction is an interesting direction to take it in. (2/3) Flavor: Yarr harr! The flavor is fine, although the mechanics or flavor text aren't super evocative; they could be for any old pirate captain.
Polish - (3/3) Quality: Check. (2/2) *Main Challenge: Check. (2/2) Subchallenges: and check. Total: 21/25
*An entry with 0 points here is subject to disqualification.
Design - (1.5/3) Appeal: Johnny and Timmy like the ramp but aren't wild, Spike is off this 100%. (2.5/3) Elegance: Straightforward enough, though the ability should just be "Sac a treasure: Add CC to your mana pool."
Development - (3/3) Viability: Artifact ramp is well within blue's purview. (1/3) Balance: So bear in mind Treasures themselves can generate one mana anyway, so you're netting one mana from the ability. So the card essentially has "T: Add C to your mana pool. Spend this mana only on artifacts", except worse because you need a Treasure to activate the ability.
This compares super poorly to similar cards; you get CC from Renowned Weaponsmith along with an (arguably) better body, lower cost and an ability to search out select artifacts to cast with that ability. Cultivator Drone is at common and yet had a better body, a looser restriction on what the mana could be spent on, no treasure requirement, and whose C mana was way more relevant in its limited format.
Combined with a very sub-par body (1/2 Prowess for 3) and this card is gonna go around the table every time (note that there's 14 artifacts in Ixalan, none of which are above 5 mana and would want a big ramper into).
Combined with the really subpar body for 3 mana and... well the card kind of sucks.
Creativity - (2.5/3) Uniqueness: Artifact ramp has been done, but tying it to treasures is interesting. (3/3) Flavor: Lovely flavor (though you totally stole it from Conntroll!)
Polish - (3/3) Quality: Check. (2/2) *Main Challenge: check. (2/2) Subchallenges: check. Total: 20.5/25
*An entry with 0 points here is subject to disqualification.
Design - (2/3) Appeal: One of the first decks I built was coin flips, and one of my guilty pleasure cards is Tavern Swindler (after winning 4 flips in a row and stealing an aggro mirror in RtR draft). So I think a certain type of Timmy just loves these effects, and Johnny is somewhat interested in a limited Treasure payoff (and a consistent treasure producer for the Treasure win-con). Spike does not want coin flip effects to be good. (2/3) Elegance: The payment clause is kind of messy.
Development - (3/3) Viability: UR are the coin flip colors. (3/3) Balance: Yeah I think this is fine as a multicolor uncommon payoff.
Creativity - (2.5/3) Uniqueness: Yarr harr, gambling! Been done a few times before, but not with this kind of payout. (3/3) Flavor: This really resonated with me and I'm not quite sure why. I can picture him laidback in a seedy tavern with a grin on his face, bottle of rum in one hand and loaded die the other.
Polish - (2/3) Quality:"...is the price of rum these days". (2/2) *Main Challenge: Check. (2/2) Subchallenges: Check. Total: 21.5/25
*An entry with 0 points here is subject to disqualification.
Design - (2/3) Appeal: Johnny and Spike are sold, Timmy less so. (0/3) Elegance: Holy balls. So this is 10 lines of text in MSE, uses a mechanic, uses an unusual token (though used frequently in the set), uses a choose one effect at each end step, with both modes using a variable based on #artifacts.
Development - (3/3) Viability: All effects that could be UR, and (2/3) Balance: And like that the Improvise decks are really bloody scary. The payoff here is with the KLD artifacts, where you drop this on turn 5 or 6 with 3-4 artifacts in play and steal a creature. At least instant speed removal can stop the EtB, but still the power level here is kind of absurd.
Creativity - (3/3) Uniqueness: Uh yeah this is pretty unique. (2.5/3) Flavor: Love the flavor text, although you're not exactly bribing the creature with the first ability. More like showing off your gold in a pyramid scheme sort of way ("Look how much booty we have, this could be yoouuuurs if you work hard enough.")
Polish - (2.5/3) Quality: Choose ones should be bullet points. (2/2) *Main Challenge: Check. (2/2) Subchallenges: Check. Total: 19/25
*An entry with 0 points here is subject to disqualification.
Design - (2.5/3) Appeal: Johnny and Timmy are onboard, Johnny because of loop shenanigans and Timmy because of reanimation shenanigans. Spike is more skeptical; the value is difficult to guarantee if the opponent is actively playing around it (using their instant speed removal as sorceries, blocking tokens instead of creatures etc) and much of the removal an opponent played would be burned earlier. (3/3) Elegance: Straightforward enough, I think the animation clause is clear enough on the restriction despite it being weird.
Development - (3/3) Viability: All good. (3/3) Balance: The "from the battlefield this turn" restriction keeps the repeated reanimation effect in check, as it gives the opponent a lot more agency on what actually comes back. That and it kind of neatly dodges the infinite chumpblocker issue by forcing the creature to die on your turn.
Creativity - (2/3) Uniqueness: Second Sunrise effects have been done a few times before (hence the name), but the mix with Raid is a fresh take on the effect. (3/3) Flavor: Appropriately ominous for the relentlessness of dead effect. Also that Dire fleet's got a lot of Orc Pirate Wizards huh?
Design - (2/3) Appeal: Timmy and Spike are moderately pleased to see a valuable 1-drop, Johnny is less interested probably baceuse most possible combos are too straightforward. (3/3) Elegance: Pretty elegant if you ask me. (3/3) Viability: Red has menace and can do things with Treasures so everything is fine. Uncommon and no less. (2,5/3) Balance: This card can be compared to Isolent Neonate in terms of playability which is something. Creativity - (2,5/3) Uniqueness: Creating mana ramp through the damage to a player is not completely new but the mix is okay. (2/3) Flavor: Name is perfect fit for Pirate faction though I don't think swabbies are really menacing. Polish - (2/3) Quality: Flavor text is not a rhyme so I think two separate lines for it are not necessary. (2/2) *Main Challenge: Yes. (2/2) Subchallenges: Yes. Total: 21/25
*An entry with 0 points here is subject to disqualification.
Design - (3/3) Appeal: All three players would like to play it. (3/3) Elegance: Pretty much understandable. Development - (3/3) Viability: Can be monored as well but the Raid effect can be blue, so yes. Rarity is correct. (2,5/3) Balance: I guess this guy is pushed but the Raid effect is not plain ETB so it's not broken but still powerful. Creativity - (2,5/3) Uniqueness: The Tolarian Winds effect is well known but the mix is fresh enough. (3/3) Flavor: Effect is crazy so I guess it fits Pirate faction well enough. Polish - (3/3) Quality: All good. (2/2) *Main Challenge: Yes. (2/2) Subchallenges: Yes. Total: 24/25
*An entry with 0 points here is subject to disqualification.
Design - (1,5/3) Appeal: Johnny can find a use for it though here and there are better Skeletons for repeatable effects. Timmy and Spike are not impressed (for Spike, it doesn't work well as defensive card which lowers its value a lot). (3/3) Elegance: Elegant enough. Development - (3/3) Viability: Black and uncommon thanks to the repeatable ability. (2/3) Balance: Kinda weak for Limited play and too weak for other formats as is - but combos! I need to say, it can create some degenerative loops with things like Ashnod's Altar or be used with Skullclamp. Creativity - (2/3) Uniqueness:Endless Cockroaches want to say something to you, but it works only on your turn and requires Raid so... (2/3) Flavor: I liked the previous version much more. Image of bottomwalking Skeleton Pirate was YARR! enough to get all three points but then you changed the name to something plain and less YARR than I wanted it to be. Flavor text is still okay. Polish - (3/3) Quality: Perfect. (2/2) *Main Challenge: Yes. (2/2) Subchallenges: Yes. Total: 20,5/25
*An entry with 0 points here is subject to disqualification.
Design - (1/3) Appeal: All three demographics aren't really impressed. (3/3) Elegance: Well understandable. Development - (3/3) Viability: Producing C is appropriate in Blue. Uncommon rarity is okay since the card doesn't work well as its own. (1,5/3) Balance: Pretty weak thanks to ability that can be used only once per turn and 1/1 body is pretty useless when you have nothing to do with ability. Creativity - (3/3) Uniqueness: Can't remember anything similar (maybe Erdwal Illuminator but he is still different). (1/3) Flavor: Man, you made a SIREN without flying. What have you done? It'd better be any other creature type. Also I didn't quite get the connection between advocates and colorless mana. Polish - (3/3) Quality: All fine. (2/2) *Main Challenge: Yes. (2/2) Subchallenges: Yes. Total: 19,5/25
*An entry with 0 points here is subject to disqualification.
Subject16 21/25
Sub_Silentio 24/25
doomfish 20,5/25
Jimmy Groove 19,5/25
Design -
(2/3) Appeal: All a bit small-scale and understated for Timmy. Has a build-around ability for Johnny and is efficient and versatile with the possibility of 2-for-1ing or better on the block for Spike.
(3/3) Elegance: Extremely elegant.
Development -
(3/3) Viability: Solidly black and rare.
(3/3) Balance: The removal activated ability is good and all on such a cheap card but it's expensive and relies on a relatively parasitic cost. Looks like it could be sort of good in Standard and Commander, possibly Limited depending on if you can draft enough Treasure making.
Creativity -
(1.5/3) Uniqueness: All kind of a variant of the general "Assassin" idea - the kind of card you see once per block on average - but still unique in terms of actual material.
(3/3) Flavor: Well-flavored with a name that rolls off the tongue.
Polish -
(3/3) Quality: No problems.
(2/2) *Main Challenge: Done.
(2/2) Subchallenges: And done.
Total: 22.5/25
Design -
(2/3) Appeal: Timmy sees the potential to crew really big Vehicles, Johnny is all over this for many reasons, Spike doesn't find it worth the effort.
(1/3) Elegance: I do love this card, but phew, is it inelegant - three fairly wordy abilities, all of which relate to a different aspect of Vehicles, and one that can create multiple token copies, which seems like a hell of a lot of tracking and memory complexity.
Development -
(1.5/3) Viability: Rarity is missing. I guess this is supposed to be rare? Blue is theoretically okay too, but the "super-crewing" ability is unprecedented and I'm not sure I like it in blue. I've never liked the idea of "here's a strange fiddly ability, just throw it to blue" - that's how blue got an overwhelmingly huge share of the color pie in Magic's earliest days. Mechanically it seems sorta green but that doesn't really fit in this context.
(3/3) Balance: This is a highly situational card, so much so that it needs to be wholly built around, and isn't breaking anything for sure.
Creativity -
(3/3) Uniqueness: You'd be hard-pressed to say this card isn't unique.
(2.5/3) Flavor: The mechanical flavor is perfect, as is the name, but I just only wish there was a tiny bit of flavor text. I'm sure fitting it would be hard, but... it's the last missing piece.
Polish -
(2/3) Quality: I can't tell you exactly how the first ability should be worded but the precedent is Diligent Farmhand/Pardic Firecat, so "for the purpose of" isn't the phrase that'd be used. Also, again, rarity missing.
(2/2) *Main Challenge: Fits.
(2/2) Subchallenges: And done.
Total: 19/25
Design -
(1/3) Appeal: Timmy doesn’t see this growing quickly or impactfully enough. Johnny sees a parasitic/build-around card so there’s a general sense of appeal there even if there’s no specific draw. Spike sees a pretty low efficiency level that requires huge building around and doesn’t want to bother.
(2.5/3) Elegance: An extremely elegant one-line card hampered by the counterintuitiveness of rewarding you for keeping around permanents that you’re meant to sacrifice, thus being some kind of Wood Elemental analogue.
Development -
(2.5/3) Viability: Rare works for a legend and all, and it’s okay as a blue card mechanically, but I can’t help but feel like a Pirate who hoards Treasures for the sake of it is actually supposed to be black.
(2.5/3) Balance: As stated with the Elegance category, this is a fairly underpowered card - since it doesn’t generate its own Treasures and forces you to keep rather than sac Treasures - for the mere goal of pumping a creature rather than outright winning you the game like Revel in Riches does. In fact, even in Commander this card seems like a complete dud.
Creativity -
(1/3) Uniqueness: Follows the template of innumerable other variable P/T cards, swapping out only the subtype it checks for.
(0.5/3) Flavor: Uses the name of an anime series for its name and has a cliche, generic flavor text.
Polish -
(2.5/3) Quality: Wording’s not wrong, per se, but it’s also not up to current templating - it would normally just say “...number of Treasures…”
(2/2) *Main Challenge: Met.
(2/2) Subchallenges: Met also.
Total: 16.5/25
Design -
(2/3) Appeal: Timmy appeal - Voltron beatz - is obvious. The marquee ability is sort of reactive for Johnny but, again, it’s build-around and Voltron is also somewhat of a Johnny idea. Spike appeal depends on whether Equipment-based decks are big in the environment - if they are this would be a hoser that would be used quite a bit, I think.
(3/3) Elegance: Pretty elegant indeed!
Development -
(3/3) Viability: Red, rare, legend, all checks out. Fun Commander stuff!
(3/3) Balance: As said before, the primary ability of this card is reactive, so there’s no
Creativity -
(2.5/3) Uniqueness: Stealing/attaching Equipment isn’t a totally unique idea but the execution is unique, same deal with double strike/double strike while “dual wielding.”
(2/3) Flavor: Once again, the “dual wield” flavor is delightful, but the name, while fitting, is slightly generic (what Pirate captain doesn’t have something to do with a blade?) and I wish there were short flavor text.
Polish -
(2.5/3) Quality: A card’s ability referring to it as “him” or “her” only happens with planeswalkers, not legends.
(2/2) *Main Challenge: Done.
(2/2) Subchallenges: And done.
Total: 22/25
Design -
(3/3) Appeal: Timmy loves him some undercosted beaters, Johnny sees a build-around card that can also self-blink to abuse ETB triggers, and Spike sees a combination of those things: Undercosted fat plus removal-proofing plus - bonus - evasion, to hell if it’s got a narrow condition to cast!
(3/3) Elegance: Three abilities but all solidly elegant.
Development -
(2.5/3) Viability: Rare and blue make sense but I just don’t see the black in this card - there’s nothing about it except the word “Greed” in the name that couldn’t be purely monoblue, and it feels multicolor for the sake of being multicolor like the worst excesses of Alara block.
(2.5/3) Balance: This is an incredibly swingy card - either you get it in hand and can’t get two Treasures out and it’s a dead card, or you have enough Treasures to cast it and keep it flickering and it’s game-deciding. Obviously the card is highly build-around and not “broken” per se but it’s frustratingly good when it works.
Creativity -
(2/3) Uniqueness: This is very close to a narrower/more parasitic version of Myr Superion, down to being 5 power for two mana.
(1.5/3) Flavor: The name is a strong point for the flavor but I’m not quite sure why this card is any greedier than your average Pirate or why it can only be hired with Treasures when most Pirates can be cast with any old mana. Some flavor text would really help explicate this all.
"You are a Pirate!"
Ixalan. A whole world that waits to be discovered. Ancient ruins from the Sun Empire's heyday can now be found, overgrown and half-buried, in the depths of the jungle. Sacred springs infused with magical power well up from high mountainsides. Hidden coves hold pirate treasures stowed by captains long forgotten. Brave explorers from all four peoples uncover such sites as they scour Ixalan in search of the golden city.
For centuries, the untamed jungles of Ixalan have hidden a coveted secret: Orazca, the city of gold. But no secret can remain undiscovered, and no treasure can be taken uncontested. Unfurl your sails, saddle up a dinosaur, and battle your rivals as you embark on a journey to claim the plane’s greatest fortune for yourself!
Guided by ancient maps, pirates are constantly looking for treasures – and for foes who will make a good food for fishes as well…
Main challenge: Design a colored Pirate creature card.
Subchallenge 1: The card is nongreen, nonwhite.
Subchallenge 2: Your card has Raid mechanic OR/AND your card cares about Treasure tokens.
Main Challenge
The card needs to be a creature. The card also needs to be colored. It should have Pirate creature type. It also may have any other creature types if necessary, but friendly reminder – most known Ixalan pirates are Humans, Goblins, Orcs and Sirens.
Subchallenge 1
Your card should have monoblue, monoblack, monored, blue-black, blue-red, black-red or blue-black-red color identity. It should have one or more colored mana symbols in mana cost and may have any nongreen, nonwhite mana symbols in rules text if necessary.
Subchallenge 2
- If you chose Raid, your card has Raid mechanic printed on it (If you attacked with a creature this turn, "effect"). Examples are Ruin Raider and Storm Fleet Aerialist.
- If you chose Treasure, it cares about colorless Treasure artifact tokens with "t, Sacrifice this artifact: Add one mana of any color to your mana pool". It can create them or somehow interact with them. Captain Lannery Storm and Prosperous Pirates are examples.
- If you chose both, do both.
Plase feel free to ask additional questions if you have any in the MCC Discussion thread.
(X/3) Appeal: Do the different player psychographics (Timmy/Johhny/Spike) have a use for the card?
(X/3) Elegance: Is the card easily understandable at a glance? Do all the flavor and mechanics combined as a whole make sense?
Development -
(X/3) Viability: How well does the card fit into the color wheel? Does it break or bend the rules of the game? Is it the appropriate rarity?
(X/3) Balance: Does the card have a power level appropriate for contemporary constructed/limited environments without breaking them? Does it play well in casual and multiplayer formats? Does it create or fit into a deck/archetype? Does it create an oppressive environment?
Creativity -
(X/3) Uniqueness: Has a card like this ever been printed before? Does it use new mechanics, ideas, or design space? Does it combine old ideas in a new way? Overall, does it feel “fresh”?
(X/3) Flavor: Does the name seem realistic for a card? Does the flavor text sound professional? Do all the flavor elements synch together to please Vorthos players?
Polish -
(X/3) Quality: Points deducted for incorrect spelling, grammar, and templating.
(X/2) *Main Challenge: Was the main challenge satisfied? Was it approached in a unique or interesting way? Does the card fit the intent of the challenge?
(X/2) Subchallenges: One point awarded per satisfied subchallenge condition.
Total: X/25
*An entry with 0 points here is subject to disqualification.
DEADLINES
Design deadline: Saturday, September 16th 2017 23:59 EDT
Judging deadline: Tuesday, September 19th 2017 23:59 EDT
JUDGES
Raptorchan
ManyCookies
void_nothing
PLAYERS
Groovelord
Sub_Silentio
IcariiFA
doomfish
netn10
RaikouRider
Vertain
BrainPo
Tesco(black)lotus
StonerOfKruphix
Subject16
Jimmy Groove
The_Hittite
Freyleyes
admirableadmiral
RickyRister
Conntroll
BRACKETS (Two TOP players from each bracket to advance)
Raptorchan
Subject16
Sub_Silentio
doomfish
Jimmy Groove
void_nothing
Vertain
Conntroll
Freyleyes
IcariiFA
RaikouRider
ManyCookies
Tesco(black)lotus
The_Hittite
netn10
StonerOfKruphix
RickyRister
Creature - Orc Pirate Assassin (R)
Deathtouch
1B, t, Sacrifice a Treasure: Destroy target creature.
"They get coin, they get name, they get rid of problem."
— Grukko, Dire Fleet Pirate
1/2
Creature - Goblin Pirate (Uncommon)
Menace
Whenever Goblin Swabbie deals combat damage to a player, create a colorless Treasure artifact token with "T, Sacrifice this artifact: Add one mana of any color to your mana pool."
"Hand over yer booty, landlubber.
No, not yer gold, yer shoes!"
1/2
Creature – Human Pirate (R)
Double strike
Raid — When Rum-Crazed Buccaneer enters the battlefield, if you attacked with a creature this turn, discard your hand, then draw that many cards.
"A drinking contest, you say? Let's make it a little more interesting."
2/2
Legendary Creature - Human Pirate [mythic rare]
Menace
Whenever you cast a red spell, Captain Ripley Vance deals 2 damage to target opponent.
Raid — Red spells you cast cost 1 less to cast if you attacked with a creature this turn.
"All cannons fire!"
2/3
Shipwreck Salvager 2U
Creature - Human Pirate Artificer [U]
Prowess
Treasures you control have "T, Sacrifice this artifact: Add CC to your mana pool. Spend this mana only to cast artifact spells."
“Every part of High and Dry used to be a ship. For the right price, it can be again.”
1/2
Creature - Skeleton Pirate (U)
Raid — When Relentless Skeleton dies, if you attacked with a creature this turn, return it to its owner’s hand.
The captain ordered to attack and it just never stopped.
1/1
Multiple instances of lifelink on the same creature are redundant.
Multiple instances of lifelink on the same creature are redundant.
—Eli Shiffrin, Rules Manager, on a design stacking lifelink instances
Legendary Creature - Human Pirate [R]
Captain Harlock’s power and toughness are each equal to the number of Treasure artifact tokens you control.
“Ooh, shiny!”
*/*
Creature - Siren Pirate (U)
Whenever you sacrifice a Treasure for the first time each turn, add C to your mana pool.
"The money's good, but you're going to have to sweeten the pot a bit. We are going to need a favor."
1/1
UBR
Legendary Creature - Bird Pirate
3/2
Flying
Hexproof
t: Gain control of target vehicle until end of turn. Untap it. It becomes a creature in addition to its other types and gains haste until end of turn. Activate this ability only at any time you could cast a sorcery.
Legendary Creature - Orc Pirate (R)
Dorganta, Captain of Blades has double strike as long as two Equipments are attached to her.
Sacrifice a Treasure: Gain control of target Equipment an opponent controls until end of turn. Attach it to Dorganta. When you lose control of that Equipment, unattach it.
3/3
Creature - Human Pirate (Uncommon)
Sacrifice a Treasure or pay 3, t: Flip a coin. If you win the flip, draw a card and create two colorless Treasure artifact tokens with "T, Sacrifice this artifact: Add one mana of any color to your mana pool."
"True piracy is the price of rum those today, but enough talking. Up for a little game?"
2/3
Voice of Greed UB
Creature - Siren Pirate {R}
Spend only mana produced by Treasures to cast Voice of Greed.
Flying
Sacrifice a Treasure: Exile Voice of Greed. Return it to the battlefield under its owner's control at the beginning of the next end step.
5/4
Emille, Seven-Sting Dancer Shalin Nariya
Creature - Orc Pirate Wizard (R)
Raid — At the beginning of your end step, if you attacked with a creature this turn, you may choose target creature card in a graveyard that was put there from the battlefield this turn. Put that card onto the battlefield under your control.
A fleet that never runs out of crew is a fearsome fleet indeed.
4/3
PS. Excuse me Legend, but you're not allowed to participate in Round 2 since you weren't in the TOP of Round 1.
(2/3) Appeal: Johnny and Spike like, Timmy doesn't care.
(3/3) Elegance: Straightforward enough.
Development -
(2.5/3) Viability: Definitely fine color pie wise, though I think this'd be more appropriate at rare.
(2/3) Balance: On the weak side for a Spikey mythic, no immediate board impact on an easily removable body and the untap effect (whether through combat or its abilities) doesn't do enough to justify.
Creativity -
(2.5/3) Uniqueness: Damage off spell casts has been done a few times before (Balefire Liege, flip Chandra plays in the same space), but the tacked on cost reduction is an interesting direction to take it in.
(2/3) Flavor: Yarr harr! The flavor is fine, although the mechanics or flavor text aren't super evocative; they could be for any old pirate captain.
Polish -
(3/3) Quality: Check.
(2/2) *Main Challenge: Check.
(2/2) Subchallenges: and check.
Total: 21/25
*An entry with 0 points here is subject to disqualification.
(1.5/3) Appeal: Johnny and Timmy like the ramp but aren't wild, Spike is off this 100%.
(2.5/3) Elegance: Straightforward enough, though the ability should just be "Sac a treasure: Add CC to your mana pool."
Development -
(3/3) Viability: Artifact ramp is well within blue's purview.
(1/3) Balance: So bear in mind Treasures themselves can generate one mana anyway, so you're netting one mana from the ability. So the card essentially has "T: Add C to your mana pool. Spend this mana only on artifacts", except worse because you need a Treasure to activate the ability.
This compares super poorly to similar cards; you get CC from Renowned Weaponsmith along with an (arguably) better body, lower cost and an ability to search out select artifacts to cast with that ability. Cultivator Drone is at common and yet had a better body, a looser restriction on what the mana could be spent on, no treasure requirement, and whose C mana was way more relevant in its limited format.
Combined with a very sub-par body (1/2 Prowess for 3) and this card is gonna go around the table every time (note that there's 14 artifacts in Ixalan, none of which are above 5 mana and would want a big ramper into).
Combined with the really subpar body for 3 mana and... well the card kind of sucks.
Creativity -
(2.5/3) Uniqueness: Artifact ramp has been done, but tying it to treasures is interesting.
(3/3) Flavor: Lovely flavor (though you totally stole it from Conntroll!)
Polish -
(3/3) Quality: Check.
(2/2) *Main Challenge: check.
(2/2) Subchallenges: check.
Total: 20.5/25
*An entry with 0 points here is subject to disqualification.
(2/3) Appeal: One of the first decks I built was coin flips, and one of my guilty pleasure cards is Tavern Swindler (after winning 4 flips in a row and stealing an aggro mirror in RtR draft). So I think a certain type of Timmy just loves these effects, and Johnny is somewhat interested in a limited Treasure payoff (and a consistent treasure producer for the Treasure win-con). Spike does not want coin flip effects to be good.
(2/3) Elegance: The payment clause is kind of messy.
Development -
(3/3) Viability: UR are the coin flip colors.
(3/3) Balance: Yeah I think this is fine as a multicolor uncommon payoff.
Creativity -
(2.5/3) Uniqueness: Yarr harr, gambling! Been done a few times before, but not with this kind of payout.
(3/3) Flavor: This really resonated with me and I'm not quite sure why. I can picture him laidback in a seedy tavern with a grin on his face, bottle of rum in one hand and loaded die the other.
Polish -
(2/3) Quality: "...is the price of rum these days".
(2/2) *Main Challenge: Check.
(2/2) Subchallenges: Check.
Total: 21.5/25
*An entry with 0 points here is subject to disqualification.
(2/3) Appeal: Johnny and Spike are sold, Timmy less so.
(0/3) Elegance: Holy balls. So this is 10 lines of text in MSE, uses a mechanic, uses an unusual token (though used frequently in the set), uses a choose one effect at each end step, with both modes using a variable based on #artifacts.
Development -
(3/3) Viability: All effects that could be UR, and
(2/3) Balance: And like that the Improvise decks are really bloody scary. The payoff here is with the KLD artifacts, where you drop this on turn 5 or 6 with 3-4 artifacts in play and steal a creature. At least instant speed removal can stop the EtB, but still the power level here is kind of absurd.
Creativity -
(3/3) Uniqueness: Uh yeah this is pretty unique.
(2.5/3) Flavor: Love the flavor text, although you're not exactly bribing the creature with the first ability. More like showing off your gold in a pyramid scheme sort of way ("Look how much booty we have, this could be yoouuuurs if you work hard enough.")
Polish -
(2.5/3) Quality: Choose ones should be bullet points.
(2/2) *Main Challenge: Check.
(2/2) Subchallenges: Check.
Total: 19/25
*An entry with 0 points here is subject to disqualification.
(2.5/3) Appeal: Johnny and Timmy are onboard, Johnny because of loop shenanigans and Timmy because of reanimation shenanigans. Spike is more skeptical; the value is difficult to guarantee if the opponent is actively playing around it (using their instant speed removal as sorceries, blocking tokens instead of creatures etc) and much of the removal an opponent played would be burned earlier.
(3/3) Elegance: Straightforward enough, I think the animation clause is clear enough on the restriction despite it being weird.
Development -
(3/3) Viability: All good.
(3/3) Balance: The "from the battlefield this turn" restriction keeps the repeated reanimation effect in check, as it gives the opponent a lot more agency on what actually comes back. That and it kind of neatly dodges the infinite chumpblocker issue by forcing the creature to die on your turn.
Creativity -
(2/3) Uniqueness: Second Sunrise effects have been done a few times before (hence the name), but the mix with Raid is a fresh take on the effect.
(3/3) Flavor: Appropriately ominous for the relentlessness of dead effect. Also that Dire fleet's got a lot of Orc Pirate Wizards huh?
Polish -
(3/3) Quality: Check.
(2/2) *Main Challenge: Check.
(2/2) Subchallenges: and check.
Great card, I want this pushed further for cube playability.
Total: 23.5/25
*An entry with 0 points here is subject to disqualification.
tesco(black)lotus: 21
The_Hittie: 20.5
netn10: 21.5
StonerofKruphix: 19
RickyRister: 23.5
(2/3) Appeal: Timmy and Spike are moderately pleased to see a valuable 1-drop, Johnny is less interested probably baceuse most possible combos are too straightforward.
(3/3) Elegance: Pretty elegant if you ask me.
(3/3) Viability: Red has menace and can do things with Treasures so everything is fine. Uncommon and no less.
(2,5/3) Balance: This card can be compared to Isolent Neonate in terms of playability which is something.
Creativity -
(2,5/3) Uniqueness: Creating mana ramp through the damage to a player is not completely new but the mix is okay.
(2/3) Flavor: Name is perfect fit for Pirate faction though I don't think swabbies are really menacing.
Polish -
(2/3) Quality: Flavor text is not a rhyme so I think two separate lines for it are not necessary.
(2/2) *Main Challenge: Yes.
(2/2) Subchallenges: Yes.
Total: 21/25
*An entry with 0 points here is subject to disqualification.
(3/3) Appeal: All three players would like to play it.
(3/3) Elegance: Pretty much understandable.
Development -
(3/3) Viability: Can be monored as well but the Raid effect can be blue, so yes. Rarity is correct.
(2,5/3) Balance: I guess this guy is pushed but the Raid effect is not plain ETB so it's not broken but still powerful.
Creativity -
(2,5/3) Uniqueness: The Tolarian Winds effect is well known but the mix is fresh enough.
(3/3) Flavor: Effect is crazy so I guess it fits Pirate faction well enough.
Polish -
(3/3) Quality: All good.
(2/2) *Main Challenge: Yes.
(2/2) Subchallenges: Yes.
Total: 24/25
*An entry with 0 points here is subject to disqualification.
(1,5/3) Appeal: Johnny can find a use for it though here and there are better Skeletons for repeatable effects. Timmy and Spike are not impressed (for Spike, it doesn't work well as defensive card which lowers its value a lot).
(3/3) Elegance: Elegant enough.
Development -
(3/3) Viability: Black and uncommon thanks to the repeatable ability.
(2/3) Balance: Kinda weak for Limited play and too weak for other formats as is - but combos! I need to say, it can create some degenerative loops with things like Ashnod's Altar or be used with Skullclamp.
Creativity -
(2/3) Uniqueness: Endless Cockroaches want to say something to you, but it works only on your turn and requires Raid so...
(2/3) Flavor: I liked the previous version much more. Image of bottomwalking Skeleton Pirate was YARR! enough to get all three points but then you changed the name to something plain and less YARR than I wanted it to be. Flavor text is still okay.
Polish -
(3/3) Quality: Perfect.
(2/2) *Main Challenge: Yes.
(2/2) Subchallenges: Yes.
Total: 20,5/25
*An entry with 0 points here is subject to disqualification.
(1/3) Appeal: All three demographics aren't really impressed.
(3/3) Elegance: Well understandable.
Development -
(3/3) Viability: Producing C is appropriate in Blue. Uncommon rarity is okay since the card doesn't work well as its own.
(1,5/3) Balance: Pretty weak thanks to ability that can be used only once per turn and 1/1 body is pretty useless when you have nothing to do with ability.
Creativity -
(3/3) Uniqueness: Can't remember anything similar (maybe Erdwal Illuminator but he is still different).
(1/3) Flavor: Man, you made a SIREN without flying. What have you done? It'd better be any other creature type. Also I didn't quite get the connection between advocates and colorless mana.
Polish -
(3/3) Quality: All fine.
(2/2) *Main Challenge: Yes.
(2/2) Subchallenges: Yes.
Total: 19,5/25
*An entry with 0 points here is subject to disqualification.
Subject16 21/25
Sub_Silentio 24/25
doomfish 20,5/25
Jimmy Groove 19,5/25
I'm a pirate.
Design -
(2/3) Appeal: All a bit small-scale and understated for Timmy. Has a build-around ability for Johnny and is efficient and versatile with the possibility of 2-for-1ing or better on the block for Spike.
(3/3) Elegance: Extremely elegant.
Development -
(3/3) Viability: Solidly black and rare.
(3/3) Balance: The removal activated ability is good and all on such a cheap card but it's expensive and relies on a relatively parasitic cost. Looks like it could be sort of good in Standard and Commander, possibly Limited depending on if you can draft enough Treasure making.
Creativity -
(1.5/3) Uniqueness: All kind of a variant of the general "Assassin" idea - the kind of card you see once per block on average - but still unique in terms of actual material.
(3/3) Flavor: Well-flavored with a name that rolls off the tongue.
Polish -
(3/3) Quality: No problems.
(2/2) *Main Challenge: Done.
(2/2) Subchallenges: And done.
Total: 22.5/25
Design -
(2/3) Appeal: Timmy sees the potential to crew really big Vehicles, Johnny is all over this for many reasons, Spike doesn't find it worth the effort.
(1/3) Elegance: I do love this card, but phew, is it inelegant - three fairly wordy abilities, all of which relate to a different aspect of Vehicles, and one that can create multiple token copies, which seems like a hell of a lot of tracking and memory complexity.
Development -
(1.5/3) Viability: Rarity is missing. I guess this is supposed to be rare? Blue is theoretically okay too, but the "super-crewing" ability is unprecedented and I'm not sure I like it in blue. I've never liked the idea of "here's a strange fiddly ability, just throw it to blue" - that's how blue got an overwhelmingly huge share of the color pie in Magic's earliest days. Mechanically it seems sorta green but that doesn't really fit in this context.
(3/3) Balance: This is a highly situational card, so much so that it needs to be wholly built around, and isn't breaking anything for sure.
Creativity -
(3/3) Uniqueness: You'd be hard-pressed to say this card isn't unique.
(2.5/3) Flavor: The mechanical flavor is perfect, as is the name, but I just only wish there was a tiny bit of flavor text. I'm sure fitting it would be hard, but... it's the last missing piece.
Polish -
(2/3) Quality: I can't tell you exactly how the first ability should be worded but the precedent is Diligent Farmhand/Pardic Firecat, so "for the purpose of" isn't the phrase that'd be used. Also, again, rarity missing.
(2/2) *Main Challenge: Fits.
(2/2) Subchallenges: And done.
Total: 19/25
Design -
(1/3) Appeal: Timmy doesn’t see this growing quickly or impactfully enough. Johnny sees a parasitic/build-around card so there’s a general sense of appeal there even if there’s no specific draw. Spike sees a pretty low efficiency level that requires huge building around and doesn’t want to bother.
(2.5/3) Elegance: An extremely elegant one-line card hampered by the counterintuitiveness of rewarding you for keeping around permanents that you’re meant to sacrifice, thus being some kind of Wood Elemental analogue.
Development -
(2.5/3) Viability: Rare works for a legend and all, and it’s okay as a blue card mechanically, but I can’t help but feel like a Pirate who hoards Treasures for the sake of it is actually supposed to be black.
(2.5/3) Balance: As stated with the Elegance category, this is a fairly underpowered card - since it doesn’t generate its own Treasures and forces you to keep rather than sac Treasures - for the mere goal of pumping a creature rather than outright winning you the game like Revel in Riches does. In fact, even in Commander this card seems like a complete dud.
Creativity -
(1/3) Uniqueness: Follows the template of innumerable other variable P/T cards, swapping out only the subtype it checks for.
(0.5/3) Flavor: Uses the name of an anime series for its name and has a cliche, generic flavor text.
Polish -
(2.5/3) Quality: Wording’s not wrong, per se, but it’s also not up to current templating - it would normally just say “...number of Treasures…”
(2/2) *Main Challenge: Met.
(2/2) Subchallenges: Met also.
Total: 16.5/25
Design -
(2/3) Appeal: Timmy appeal - Voltron beatz - is obvious. The marquee ability is sort of reactive for Johnny but, again, it’s build-around and Voltron is also somewhat of a Johnny idea. Spike appeal depends on whether Equipment-based decks are big in the environment - if they are this would be a hoser that would be used quite a bit, I think.
(3/3) Elegance: Pretty elegant indeed!
Development -
(3/3) Viability: Red, rare, legend, all checks out. Fun Commander stuff!
(3/3) Balance: As said before, the primary ability of this card is reactive, so there’s no
Creativity -
(2.5/3) Uniqueness: Stealing/attaching Equipment isn’t a totally unique idea but the execution is unique, same deal with double strike/double strike while “dual wielding.”
(2/3) Flavor: Once again, the “dual wield” flavor is delightful, but the name, while fitting, is slightly generic (what Pirate captain doesn’t have something to do with a blade?) and I wish there were short flavor text.
Polish -
(2.5/3) Quality: A card’s ability referring to it as “him” or “her” only happens with planeswalkers, not legends.
(2/2) *Main Challenge: Done.
(2/2) Subchallenges: And done.
Total: 22/25
Design -
(3/3) Appeal: Timmy loves him some undercosted beaters, Johnny sees a build-around card that can also self-blink to abuse ETB triggers, and Spike sees a combination of those things: Undercosted fat plus removal-proofing plus - bonus - evasion, to hell if it’s got a narrow condition to cast!
(3/3) Elegance: Three abilities but all solidly elegant.
Development -
(2.5/3) Viability: Rare and blue make sense but I just don’t see the black in this card - there’s nothing about it except the word “Greed” in the name that couldn’t be purely monoblue, and it feels multicolor for the sake of being multicolor like the worst excesses of Alara block.
(2.5/3) Balance: This is an incredibly swingy card - either you get it in hand and can’t get two Treasures out and it’s a dead card, or you have enough Treasures to cast it and keep it flickering and it’s game-deciding. Obviously the card is highly build-around and not “broken” per se but it’s frustratingly good when it works.
Creativity -
(2/3) Uniqueness: This is very close to a narrower/more parasitic version of Myr Superion, down to being 5 power for two mana.
(1.5/3) Flavor: The name is a strong point for the flavor but I’m not quite sure why this card is any greedier than your average Pirate or why it can only be hired with Treasures when most Pirates can be cast with any old mana. Some flavor text would really help explicate this all.
Polish -
(3/3) Quality: Solid.
(2/2) *Main Challenge: Good.
(2/2) Subchallenges: And done.
Total: 21.5/25
Vertain 22.5
IcariiFA 22
RaikouRider 21.5
Conntroll 19
Freyleyes 16.5
I̟̥͍̠ͅn̩͉̣͍̬͚ͅ ̬̬͖t̯̹̞̺͖͓̯̤h̘͍̬e͙̯͈̖̼̮ ̭̬f̺̲̲̪i͙͉̟̩̰r̪̝͚͈̝̥͍̝̲s̼̻͇̘̳͔ͅt̲̺̳̗̜̪̙ ̳̺̥̻͚̗ͅm̜̜̟̰͈͓͎͇o̝̖̮̝͇m̯̻̞̼̫̗͓̤e̩̯̬̮̩n͎̱̪̲̹͖t͇̖s̰̮ͅ,̤̲͙̻̭̻̯̹̰ ̖t̫̙̺̯͖͚̯ͅh͙̯̦̳̗̰̟e͖̪͉̼̯ ̪͕g̞̣͔a̗̦t̬̬͓͙̫̖̭̻e̩̻̯ ̜̖̦̖̤̭͙̬t̞̹̥̪͎͉ͅo͕͚͍͇̲͇͓̺ ̭̬͙͈̣̻t͈͍͙͓̫̖͙̩h̪̬̖̙e̗͈ ̗̬̟̞̺̤͉̯ͅa̦̯͚̙̜̮f͉͙̲̣̞̼t̪̤̞̣͚e̲͉̳̥r͇̪̙͚͓l̥̞̞͎̹̯̹ͅi͓̬f̮̥̬̞͈ͅe͎ ̟̩̤̳̠̯̩̯o̮̘̲p̟͚̣̞͉͓e͍̩̣n͔̼͕͚̜e̬̱d̼̘͎̖̹͍̮̠,͖̺̭̱̮ ̣̲͖̬̪̭̥a̪͚n̟̲̝̤̤̞̗d̘̱̗͇̮͕̳͕͔ ͖̞͉͎t̹̙͎h̰̱͉̗e̪̞̱̝̹̩ͅ ̠̱̩̭̦p̯̙e͓o̳͚̰̯̺̱̰͔̘p̬͎̱̣̼̩͇l̗̟̖͚̠e̱͉͔̱̦̬̟̙ ̖͚̪͔̼̦w̺̖̤̱e͖̗̻̦͓̖̘̜r̭̥e͔̹̫̱͕̦̰͕ ̗͔̠p̠̗͍͍̱̳̠r̰͔͎̰o͉̥͓̰͚̥s̟͚̹̱͔̣t͉̙̳̖͖̪̮r̥̘̥͙̹a͉̟̫̟̳̠̟̭t͈̜̰͈͎e̞̣̭̲̬ ͚̗̯̟͙i͍͖̰̘̦͖͉ṇ̮̻̯̦̲̩͍ ̦̮͚̫̤t͉͖̫͕ͅͅh͙̮̻̘̣̮̼e͕̺ ͙l͕̠͎̰̥i̲͓͉̲g̫̳̟͈͇̖h̠̦̖t͓̯͎̗ ̳̪̘̟̙̩̦o̫̲f̙͔̰̙̠ ̹̪̗͇̯t͖̼̼͉͖̬h̹͇̩e͚̖̺̤͉̹͕̪ ͚͓̭̝̺G͎̗̯̩o̫̯̮̟̮̳̘d̜̲͙̠-̩̳̯̲̗̜P̹̘̥͉̝h͍͈̗̖̝ͅa͍̗̮̼̗r̜̖͇̙̺a̭̺͔̞̳͈o̪̣͓̯̬͙̯̰̗h̖̦͈̥̯͔.͇̣̙̝