(This banner is my own elaboration on the art of the card Imminent Doom by Daniel Ljunggren.)
July MCC Round 4 (Finals)
"The Return of the God-Pharaoh"
This month we're going to focus on the mechanics and flavor of HOU. It's literally just yesterday that we've seen Nicol Bolas defeating the Gatewatch, so it feels like the right time for us to pay tribute to our new Dragon overlord... Ehm... I mean, to the winner of the fight on Amonkhet. Nothing more. Of course...
Main challenge: Design a signature spell for Nicol Bolas. It can't be a land. Please see clarifications."Either he would have deaths, screams, and blood, or he would, perhaps, have something better."
Subchallenge 1: The card is not a creature."Miserable lives that would soon have ended anyway ended just a bit sooner, with a touch more violence."
Subchallenge 2: The card has a monocolored mana cost. It can have offcolor mana symbols in its rules text."But fire, against a dragon? A dragon. I have standards."
Main Challenge
A "signature spell" is one strongly associated with the specific planeswalker, either because the character casts it him or herself or because of other flavor reasons (sometimes mechanical reasons too). Ideally, it should contain the character's name in the card name. The following cycles from M11, M12 and M13 are provided as reference. What I expect from you this round is something like this, but for Bolas (yes, ignoring the fact that it already happened in M13, we're looking for a new card here).
Subchallenge 1
Should be self-explanatory. Your card does not have the creature card type. No artifact creatures, enchantment creatures, or such.
Subchallenge 2
Pay attention: this time we're only caring about mana cost, not color identity for once. This means that this time you CAN have off-color mana symbols in the rules text, including mana symbols of any kind, such as hybrid mana or Phyrexian mana.
Feel free to ask any additional questions you might have in the discussion thread.
A friendly reminder I left everyone a few months ago but it's still valid:
A reminder to everyone: In the MCC, putting rarity on cards is mandatory! If you don't put a rarity on your card, expect huge deductions in both Viability AND Quality.
Also, you should format your text cards accordingly to the forum rules (see the "this formatting looks best" spoiler in the linked OP). Again, expect deductions in Quality otherwise.
(The link to the forum rules has been fixed as of August 2nd 2017.)
Design - (X/3) Appeal: Do the different player psychographics (Timmy/Johhny/Spike) have a use for the card? (X/3) Elegance: Is the card easily understandable at a glance? Do all the flavor and mechanics combined as a whole make sense?
Development - (X/3) Viability: How well does the card fit into the color wheel? Does it break or bend the rules of the game? Is it the appropriate rarity? (X/3) Balance: Does the card have a power level appropriate for contemporary constructed/limited environments without breaking them? Does it play well in casual and multiplayer formats? Does it create or fit into a deck/archetype? Does it create an oppressive environment?
Creativity - (X/3) Uniqueness: Has a card like this ever been printed before? Does it use new mechanics, ideas, or design space? Does it combine old ideas in a new way? Overall, does it feel “fresh”? (X/3) Flavor: Does the name seem realistic for a card? Does the flavor text sound professional? Do all the flavor elements synch together to please Vorthos players?
Polish - (X/3) Quality: Points deducted for incorrect spelling, grammar, and templating. (X/2) *Main Challenge: Was the main challenge satisfied? Was it approached in a unique or interesting way? Does the card fit the intent of the challenge? (X/2) Subchallenges: One point awarded per satisfied subchallenge condition.
Total: X/25
*An entry with 0 points here is subject to disqualification.
DEADLINES
Design deadline: Monday, July 31st 2017 23:59 EDT
Judging deadline: Friday, August 4th 2017 23:59 EDT
JUDGES
bravelion83
StonerOfKruphix
Rocco
Blydden
PLAYERS
admirableadmiral
Jimmy Groove
The_Hittite
willows
Only the above players are allowed to submit a card. To everyone else, better luck next month!
This is the final round, so every judge will judge every card and the player who gets the highest combined score will be our MCC champion for this month.
MCC - Winner (6): Oct 2014, Apr Nov 2017, Jan 2018, Apr Jun 2019 || Host (15): Dec 2014, Apr Jul Aug Dec 2015, Mar Jul Aug Oct 2016, Feb Jul 2017, Jun Nov 2018, Feb Jul 2019 (last one here) || Judge (34): every month from Nov 2014 to Nov 2016 except Oct 2015, every month from Feb to Jul 2017 except Apr 2017, then Oct 2017, May Jun Nov 2018, Feb Jul 2019 (last one here) CCL - Winner (3): Jul 2016 (tied with Flatline), May 2017, Jul 2019 (last one here) || Host (5): Feb 2015, Mar Apr May Jun 2016 DCC - Winner (1): Mar 2015 (tied with Piar) || Host (3): May Oct 2015, Jan 2016
• The two public custom sets I've been part a part of the design team for: "Brotherhood of Ormos" - Blog post with all info - set thread - design skeleton / card list || "Extinctia: Homo Evanuit" - Blog post with all info - set thread - card list spreadsheet
• "The Lion's Lair", my article series about MTG and custom card design in particular. Latest article here. Here is the article index.Rather outdated by now, and based on the old MCC rubric, but I'm leaving this here for anybody that might be interested anyway.
• My only public attempt at being a writer: the story of my Leonin custom planeswalker Jeff Lionheart. (I have a very big one that I'm working on right now but that's private for now, and I don't know if I will ever actually publish it, and I also have ideas for multiple future ones, including one where I'm going to reprise Jeff.)
Bolas’ Dominion6BB
Sorcery [M]
You control target opponent during his or her next turn. Exile Bolas’ Dominion.
Overload 7UBR(You may cast this spell for its overload cost. If you do, change its text by replacing all instances of "target" with "each.") The surviving guilds were given a choice: kneel before Bolas or be knelt.
In Bolas' Claw3UU
Enchantment - Aura (R)
Enchant creature
You control enchanted creature.
Sacrifice enchanted creature, BR: Enchanted creature deals damage equal to its power to it's owner. That player discards that many cards.
While searching your library, you may cast In Bolas' Claw if you control a Bolas planeswalker. Those who oppose Bolas must be afraid even of their own allies, because none are safe from his influence.
Bolas's TreacheryRR
Enchantment [R]
Whenever you gain control of a permanent from another player, Bolas's Treachery deals 3 damage to that player. You may sacrifice that permanent at the beginning of the next end step. 3RR: Gain control of target creature until end of turn. Untap it. It gains haste until end of turn. At the beginning of the next end step, sacrifice Bolas's Treachery. Activate this ability only any time you could cast a sorcery.
Bolas' Monologue3UU
Enchantment (R)
At the beginning of your upkeep, exile the top card of each opponent's library. Then, you may cast an instant or sorcery card exiled with Bolas' Monologue or a Bolas planeswalker and you may spend mana as though it were mana of any color to cast it. "You see, I wanted you to do all those things. It was all a part of a greater plan…"
— Nicol Bolas
The round is closed. Judging may begin. Every judge judges every card.
Judges, let's try to make it in a few days if possible, thanks.
Private Mod Note
():
Rollback Post to RevisionRollBack
MCC - Winner (6): Oct 2014, Apr Nov 2017, Jan 2018, Apr Jun 2019 || Host (15): Dec 2014, Apr Jul Aug Dec 2015, Mar Jul Aug Oct 2016, Feb Jul 2017, Jun Nov 2018, Feb Jul 2019 (last one here) || Judge (34): every month from Nov 2014 to Nov 2016 except Oct 2015, every month from Feb to Jul 2017 except Apr 2017, then Oct 2017, May Jun Nov 2018, Feb Jul 2019 (last one here) CCL - Winner (3): Jul 2016 (tied with Flatline), May 2017, Jul 2019 (last one here) || Host (5): Feb 2015, Mar Apr May Jun 2016 DCC - Winner (1): Mar 2015 (tied with Piar) || Host (3): May Oct 2015, Jan 2016
• The two public custom sets I've been part a part of the design team for: "Brotherhood of Ormos" - Blog post with all info - set thread - design skeleton / card list || "Extinctia: Homo Evanuit" - Blog post with all info - set thread - card list spreadsheet
• "The Lion's Lair", my article series about MTG and custom card design in particular. Latest article here. Here is the article index.Rather outdated by now, and based on the old MCC rubric, but I'm leaving this here for anybody that might be interested anyway.
• My only public attempt at being a writer: the story of my Leonin custom planeswalker Jeff Lionheart. (I have a very big one that I'm working on right now but that's private for now, and I don't know if I will ever actually publish it, and I also have ideas for multiple future ones, including one where I'm going to reprise Jeff.)
I found myself being more critical than in prior rounds, which I suppose could be appropriate for a final. Apologies for the low scores, but at least everyone got the same Darth Rocco treatment.
Bolas’ Dominion6BB
Sorcery [M]
You control target opponent during his or her next turn. Exile Bolas’ Dominion.
Overload 7UBR(You may cast this spell for its overload cost. If you do, change its text by replacing all instances of "target" with "each.") The surviving guilds were given a choice: kneel before Bolas or be knelt.
Design - (2/3) Appeal: Timmy is considering building another EDH deck JUST to put this card in it. I think he'll be disappointed by how things play out if he ever overloads it, but for now, he's in love. Johnny likes the meta-game of figuring out how to reliably cast this, but prefers his expensive combo payoffs to be more open-and-shut game winners. Spike is drooling at the potential to control entire rounds of EDH, but isn't holding his breath that this will ever get cast. (2/3) Elegance: I'm a bit torn on this. "Control target player" and Overload are some of the most inelegant mechanics on their own, but this is as straightforward and clever an implementation of them as could be expected.
Development - (1.5/3) Viability: The main effect is definitely black. If the overload cost were also monoblack, I'd expect it to cost more than just mana, but making it Grixis sidesteps this. Blue and red are the other "gain control" colors, and this IS a Bolas-themed card, so it all checks out, color-wise. No rules are broken, and it couldn't be anything other than mythic. This would never be printed in a Standard-legal set, and I'm not sure Wizards would print a big, bombastic story-related mythic in a Commander Series precon that ISN'T a legendary creature. Actually, no non-creature mythics have been printed in a commander release except for the planeswalkers that can be commanders. (3/3) Balance:Worst Fears is undeniably a powerful card, but it actually saw hardly any competitive play (especially in Standard). Since this card is just "Worse Worst Fears" in two-player formats, it's essentially unplayable except in multiplayer (and really, only in Highlander variants like Commander). Because it's a multiplayer-focused design, being strictly worse than its non-overload-able counterpart isn't so much an issue. The balance is just about perfect for Commander, though other multiplayer formats not so much. I almost talked myself into deducting points here, but all of these gripes are actually viability-related. I compromised with a 0.5 point deduction in that category.
Creativity - (2.5/3) Uniqueness: The main effect isn't anything new, or even used in a unique way on its own. Overload is an existing mechanic, and has no new implementations here. But taken together, the result is an effect that hasn't been seen before. I do like the creative use of old tools. (3/3) Flavor: Yeah, that's very Bolas. Name fits the mechanics great, and flavor text builds meaning into the card using simple, evocative storytelling.
Polish - (1.5/3) Quality: Singular possessives ending in S normally do get the 's at the end, but this isn't the case for ancient names, like Hercules. Bolas is an elder dragon, after all, so no points deducted. The first effect should read, "You control target player during that player's next turn." I know, I know. Sounds weird, but there'sprecedence (-0.5). Both of those examples are also mythics, and they still include reminder text for this very weird and unintuitive "control target player" mechanic. This should have, too (-1). (1/2) *Main Challenge: It's definitely Bolas-themed, but the effect is just something we could imagine him doing at some point. It doesn't reference, supplement, or synergize with an existing Bolas planeswalker. (2/2) Subchallenges: Yup and yup.
Total: 18.5/25
*An entry with 0 points here is subject to disqualification.
In Bolas' Claw3UU
Enchantment - Aura (R)
Enchant creature
You control enchanted creature.
Sacrifice enchanted creature, BR: Enchanted creature deals damage equal to its power to it's owner. That player discards that many cards.
While searching your library, you may cast In Bolas' Claw if you control a Bolas planeswalker. Those who oppose Bolas must be afraid even of their own allies, because none are safe from his influence.
Design - (3/3) Appeal: Timmy will gladly overlook the steep color requirements and the "sac controlled creature" clause in order to cast this as often as possible forever. There are like six things about this card Johnny is pretty sure he can break wide open. Spike is looking forward to showing both of them how this card should REALLY be played. So much opportunity for synergy! It's like three different cards all in the same slot. If it were possible, I'd give this a 4 or 4.5 for Appeal. (0/3) Elegance: You're combining some very unusual and unrelated mechanics here. They feel completely disjointed from each other, and would even be a bit confusing on their own. This card essentially has two modes: "You control target creature" and "Destroy target creature, then ***** hits the fan." And yes, sometimes you'll end up keeping the creature around, then saccing it later. As much as I generally like non-obvious design like that, it feels swingy and clumsy here. (Full disclosure — I've had points deducted for using the Panglacial Wurm ability, too. If it were just that, it might be OK.)
Development - (1.5/3) Viability: Color wheel is fine. Each effect is solidly within the colors of its cost. There's so much going on, and it would usually result in such huge life swings and hand disruption that this absolutely needed to be mythic. The line between rare and mythic rare isn't always well-defined, but this card isn't anywhere near that line. No rules are explicitly broken, but the "unwritten rules" are being walked all over (See Balance). (0/3) Balance: This is INSANE. It's a Mind Control with no less than THREE huge upsides that are each arguably stronger than the "Control enchanted creature" ability (The last ability is obviously dependent on the first, but you take my meaning). Just like... daaaaaang, Jimmy my man.
Creativity - (2/3) Uniqueness: The first half of Cruel Ultimatum has never been an aura before, so that's something, heh heh. The "steal then sac for value" effect isn't NEW, per se, though we don't usually expect to see the best of both of those effects printed on the same card. Imbalanced as that is, it's a fun attempt at an explosive, flavorful rare. And the Panglacial Wurm ability is interesting here. (1.5/3) Flavor: Just considering the imagery of the abilities, they do feel very Bolas-like — very "inevitable". I actually adore that the card depicts an insignificant hero being literally grabbed by an elder dragon and flung at the actually-worthy enemy. It's so great. The problem with this is that it works so well under a literal translation of the name of the card that the flavor text falls very flat. If being "in Bolas' claw" is only supposed to be metaphorical, as the flavor text implies, then it mars the fantastic mechanical flavor of the rest of the card. On a more minor note, a single claw isn't really capable of grabbing things. The name should be "In Bolas' Claws"
Polish - (.5/3) Quality: Singular possessives ending in S normally do get the 's at the end, but this isn't the case for ancient names, like Hercules. Bolas is an elder dragon, after all, so no points deducted. The mana cost of the sac ability should precede the non-mana cost (-0.5). The second "its" in the same ability contains an erroneous apostrophe (-0.5). The final ability isn't a replacement effect, and shouldn't use the word "if". (-1) There should also be an extra "your", as-per the only printed example of this effect (-0.5). All said, it should read, "As long as you control a Bolas planeswalker, while you're searching your library, you may cast ~ from your library." (2/2) *Main Challenge: Little bit clumsy in its interaction with Bolas, but the flavor of the ability makes up for it. (2/2) Subchallenges: Yup and Yessir
Total: 12.5/25
*An entry with 0 points here is subject to disqualification.
Bolas's TreacheryRR
Enchantment [R]
Whenever you gain control of a permanent from another player, Bolas's Treachery deals 3 damage to that player. You may sacrifice that permanent at the beginning of the next end step. 3RR: Gain control of target creature until end of turn. Untap it. It gains haste until end of turn. At the beginning of the next end step, sacrifice Bolas's Treachery. Activate this ability only any time you could cast a sorcery.
Design - (1.5/3) Appeal: Timmy doesn't like sacrificing things for incremental value, especially things he had to invest so much into obtaining, but if he figures out this is literally a Slave of Bolas glued to a Lava Spike, he might come around. Johnny's all over this, as it has significant combo potential. Spike sees a do-nothing 2-drop that forces him into red. it also would cause him to reveal his plan pretty far in advance, and he prefers playing his cards closer to his chest... um, so to speak. (1/3) Elegance: The first ability on its own is already a bit awkward, both because of its relative obscurity and the delayed triggered ability that that also has a "may" clause. Then, its interplay with the second ability caused me to second-guess whether I had even read it correctly. The actual way it interacts with the second ability is a bit different than I thought by reading it the first time. The second ability also subverts expectations on its own, due to a departure from the usual ending to this style of effect. You'd expect it to force the sacrifice of the stolen creature, but it sacs itself instead. As a whole, once the card is fully comprehended, I actually do like how everything fits together. It's just laid out in a discombobulating way.
Development - (2/3) Viability: This is mostly fine, color-wise, though one of its spiritual predecessors is more black than red. It's definitely too weird to be uncommon, and probably not powerful enough for mythic, so the rarity's good. Why could this not have said "Whenever you gain control of a creature an opponent owns...?" limiting it to creatures you take control of while they're already on the battlefield closes off a lot of fun possible interactions. It wouldn't be game-breaking to let this combo with the likes of Deadeye Navigator or Grave Betrayal. There doesn't seem to be a good enough reason to quote a 15-year-old card with the only existing instance of this wording (It's not that big a deal, just a minor gripe). 2.5/3) Balance: The end result of this card, minus any incidental value from the first ability, is the same as casting Lava Spike followed by Slave of Bolas. That would cost only a mana less than this card, which lets you spread the cost out as well as having the possibility of exploiting its first ability. I don't think it would mess up the strategy if its mana cost was 2R instead of RR. In limited, the first ability won't often be relevant, but it COULD get out of hand in eternal formats. In EDH, not many cards that sound like they'd work with this actually would (For instance, Thieves' Auction doesn't interact with the first ability, since no player controls cards in exile). However, there are some that would combo with this in ridiculous ways: Molten Primordial, Mass Mutiny, Scrambleverse...
Creativity - (1.5/3) Uniqueness: Its component elements are combined in an artful way, and the damage trigger from stealing creatures is uncommon enough to warrant calling it "unique-ish". However, as mentioned a few times now, most of the time, this card's effect will be that of Lava Spike followed by Slave of Bolas, with wording borrowed from Risky Move. Knowing that rather dulls my enjoyment of an otherwise creative design. (2/3) Flavor: Everything is mostly great. All the elements work towards a common flavor goal, which is indeed very Bolas-like. I'm not taking a point for the lack of flavor text, as the mechanical flavor is almost strong enough to carry the card on its own. But the final clause of the card's second ability that causes you to sacrifice itself seems like it was included purely out of mechanical necessity. Since the card is relying entirely on mechanical flavor, it's quite jarring from a fluff perspective.
Polish - (3/3) Quality: At first glance I THOUGHT I would be docking you for the "from another player" phrase, but it's definitely Oracle-sanctioned terminology. I give you a hundred style points for making such a risky move by referencing Risky Move. You've chosen the classically correct possessive form of Bolas (singular names ending in S get the 's treatment), though Wizards has shied away from printing his name in the possessive so far, so it's impossible to know which form they'd choose. Everything is fine here. (2/2) *Main Challenge: It has cool synergy with OG Bolas, but I call foul on using an existing card with "Bolas" in the name as a framework for designing a new Bolas signature spell. (2/2) Subchallenges: Yes and Affirmative
Total: 17.5/25
*An entry with 0 points here is subject to disqualification.
Bolas' Monologue3UU
Enchantment (R)
At the beginning of your upkeep, exile the top card of each opponent's library. Then, you may cast an instant or sorcery card exiled with Bolas' Monologue or a Bolas planeswalker and you may spend mana as though it were mana of any color to cast it. "You see, I wanted you to do all those things. It was all a part of a greater plan…"
— Nicol Bolas
Design - (2/3) Appeal: Timmy's in love. Johnny knows this is unreliable and very dependent on the matchup. Spike loves the idea of killing opponents with their own weapons, but the critical mass of value is just too hard to get to for this to be competitive enough for him. All three would gladly play this in EDH, but not necessarily because it "speaks" to them. I think this is worth a collective point. (3/3) Elegance: Everything flows nicely and makes perfect sense. There's an issue with the "Bolas planeswalker" clause, but it doesn't really detract from the elegance of the card.
Development - (0/3) Viability: Blue CAN get this opponent's-top-card exile effect, but not often, and only by jumping through some hoops (See: Mindreaver, Grimoire Thief, Daxos of Meletis). Red even has an easier way to get this effect (See: Grenzo, Havok Raiser). It isn't a huge bend, and wouldn't be a big issue, but it would have made a much more appropriate Grixis-colored card. Seems like it was kept monoblue only because of the stipulations of the challenge. Worded the way you have it, you will be able to cast cards exiled with ANY Bolas walker, not just ones you control(led). If this is an accident, then the design fails to even get off the ground. Assuming this is intended, that's crazy, man! Clever, but crazy. Wizards just wouldn't do this; it's too weird and feel-bad. Additionally, none of the exiling abilities of Nicol Bolas, God-Pharaoh call for remembering which cards they exile; they just go into the generic exile zone. This effect would be damn near impossible to track correctly in most cases. This could and would straight-up brick games. (2.5/3) Balance: Evaluating the balance of this card is tricky. Near as I can tell, exiling a single card off the top, and being able to cast it with any mana, costs about 1. This card limits you to instants and sorceries, but allows a potentially larger selection. Taking into account the relative unreliability of getting this working with Nicol Bolas, God-Pharaoh, I'm costing its effect at 1.5 mana per opponent, per upkeep. In a two-player game, it would have to stick around for 3 to 4 triggers in order to pay for itself, which is reasonable in most cases (It's basically a bizarro-world, one-of Honden of Seeing Winds, so the cost is even a bit high). In Commander, though, there are more potential hits, and all exiled cards continue to be available to cast with the upkeep trigger. The value increases exponentially, rather than just x4, because you have the potential of hitting multiple instants/sorceries, casting one, and saving the other(s) for later turns. This extra power is balanced by the greater density of enchantment removal in the format, so I think it's just about right in Commander. Creavity - (3/3) Uniqueness: As mentioned, similar effects have been printed, but this is different enough, and designed creatively enough, not to feel rehashed. (1.5/3) Flavor: You're clearly aiming to depict a classic "Evil Genius" speech. The name and flavor text make that pretty explicit. Bolas is a big, scaly puppeteer, pulling everyone's strings behind the scenes. I can dig it. My two complaints are that a) It paints Bolas in the same light as a goofy Bond villain, foolishly explaining his master plan before ensuring the hero can't possibly escape and thwart it. And b) That flavor text is pretty bland. It reads like a rushed draft of an idea for flavor text. Polish - (3/3) Quality: Singular possessives ending in S normally do get the 's at the end, but this isn't the case for ancient names, like Hercules. Bolas is an elder dragon, after all, so no points deducted. (2/2) *Main Challenge: Met. Nice job having this interact with a Bolas planeswalker. (2/2) Subchallenges:Hai and Si.
Total: 19/25
*An entry with 0 points here is subject to disqualification.
Bolas's TreacheryRR
Enchantment [R]
Whenever you gain control of a permanent from another player, Bolas's Treachery deals 3 damage to that player. You may sacrifice that permanent at the beginning of the next end step. 3RR: Gain control of target creature until end of turn. Untap it. It gains haste until end of turn. At the beginning of the next end step, sacrifice Bolas's Treachery. Activate this ability only any time you could cast a sorcery.
Design (2/3) Appeal - I don't think Timmy would be very interested in this, unlike Johnny, who is very interested. The first ability is very open ended and I think there are a lot of tricks he can do with this card. Spike likes being able to activate the Threaten ability repeatedly in a vacuum, but then he looks at the cost and realizes he will not realistically be able to activate it multiple times before having to sacrifice the enchantment. (1.5/3) Elegance - Very wordy. Also, "sacrifice this" being a delayed effect of the activated ability rather than a cost feels not so good to me in this area. I feel like "3RR, Sacrifice Bolas's Treachery" would have been much cleaner.
Development (2.5/3) Viability - No problems with the color pie. I don't have particular problems with this at rare, but I feel like this could (should?) be a mythic too. (1/3) Balance - In limited, it's essentially an Act of Treason for seven mana (two to cast and five to activate), and if you see it in that way it's essentially unplayable. Stealing permanents doesn't happen as often in limited as to justify this being used there for its first ability. In constructed it looks more playable, but you still need a critical mass of stealing effects that are not exactly cheap in mana usually. A constructed deck built around this looks potentially powerful but very slow, something that might be acceptable in casual but certainly not in competitive formats. Anyway, stealing permanents is a notorious example of an ability that's perceived as unfun by a lot of players, so if you manage to build a deck around this in casual, I don't know how long it will last in your play group. Of course you can never generalize, but I think a lot of casual players wouldn't want to play against such a deck.
Creativity (3/3) Uniqueness - Having an ability trigger when you gain control of a permanent feels very original and has not been done before if I checked Gatherer correctly. (2.5/3) Flavor - The name is good and plays very nicely into the Act of Treason space. No flavor text, but the rules text is already nine lines in MSE, so there is really no room for it. Not a big problem.
Polish (3/3) Quality - My first instinct was that the "from another player" part just had to be wrong, but luckily I have the habit of checking Gatherer before making any call in this area. It turns out Risky Move exists and both its printed text and its Oracle text have the same exact wording you used for that ability, so it's actually good. (2/2) Main Challenge - Good. (2/2) Subchallenges - Both met.
Total: 19.5/25
In Bolas' Claw3UU
Enchantment - Aura (R)
Enchant creature
You control enchanted creature.
Sacrifice enchanted creature, BR: Enchanted creature deals damage equal to its power to it's owner. That player discards that many cards.
While searching your library, you may cast In Bolas' Claw if you control a Bolas planeswalker. Those who oppose Bolas must be afraid even of their own allies, because none are safe from his influence.
Design (2.5/3) Appeal - Timmy has a very asymmetrical experience with this: he likes to play it but hates having it played against. Johnny could use the last two abilities somehow. Spike likes the high powered activated ability that turns this card into straight up removal. (1/3) Elegance - Wordy and the last ability feels tackled on to me. I don't see any connection to the other abilities. It's not necessarily needed but it would have been nice if the abilities were connected somehow.
Development (1.5/3) Viability - Mind Control is blue, the activated ability is red (direct damage) and black (discard). The last ability has only been on a green card before, but I can see it in blue too. It's also a known rules nightmare. I feel like this could (should?) be a mythic though. (1/3) Balance - So for the same cost as the basic Mind Control effect you get two additional upsides, and what upsides! A bunch of damage to the head and discard on top of getting rid of the creature you stole, AND being able to cast this out of, say, a fetchland activation. Honestly, it feels a bit too much to me. I think this should cost at least one mana more than the base effect. As for playability, this is definitely playable in limited. Mind Control effects are usually not very playable in competitive constructed, but I feel like the activated ability is so good that it can change that. This looks very (too?) good in a Grixis control shell, and that's already a Standard playable deck as of now, I'm not sure a further boost is needed. The fetchland thing might have Modern implications too, but I'm afraid it might make casting this a bit too easy. The "its owner" part is relevant in multiplayer. Finally, stealing creature is notoriously not that fun from the other side of the table, especially in casual.
Creativity (1/3) Uniqueness - Just another twist on Mind Control, and there are a lot of those in esistence. Panglacial Wurm too. (3/3) Flavor - The name is good and it reminds me of In Garruk's Wake in a way. The flavor text is also quite good.
Polish (0/3) Quality - The Saxon genitive form keeps the "s" when the name is singular (example in Magic: Rakdos's Return), so this card should be called In Bolas's Claw (-0.5 for mild grammar mistake). In an activated ability, the mana cost always comes before the non-mana costs (-1 for very well known fact). In "its owner" there should be no apostrophe (-1 for serious grammar mistake). The ironic thing, that makes this mistake even worse, is that you just wrote it right two words before ("its power")! In both cases it's a possessive adjective and not a verb, so its right use is without the apostrophe. Finally, Panglacial Wurm says that the last ability should be "While you're searching..." (-0.5), or at least I guess that's what it would say if Wurms could talk! (2/2) Main Challenge - Good. (2/2) Subchallenges - Both met.
Total: 14/25
Bolas’ Dominion6BB
Sorcery [M]
You control target opponent during his or her next turn. Exile Bolas’ Dominion.
Overload 7UBR(You may cast this spell for its overload cost. If you do, change its text by replacing all instances of "target" with "each.") The surviving guilds were given a choice: kneel before Bolas or be knelt.
Design (2/3) Appeal - This is a perfect Timmy card, a big spell that lets him experience something that viscerally feels powerful. I don't see anything for Johnny (thank goodness this can't be recurred...) or Spike (he just looks at the costs and moves on). (3/3) Elegance - Very elegant, short and flavorful. Overloading this also looks intuitive enough.
Development (3/3) Viability - Controlling a player is black in the color pie, and I can definitely see it in blue too. Red is a stretch, but the Bolas flavor is so strong that this feels like an acceptable bend. Also, you're still requiring blue and black mana to overload, not just red. Mythic is definitely right. (1.5/3) Balance - I really like the comparison to Worst Fears: same CMC but one more colored mana for the ability to overload it in multiplayer games. There is another difference with this specifying "opponent" rather than "player", but let's be honest: when would you ever target yourself or a teammate with a Mindslaver effect? There's no point in controlling yourself (you always do in theory...), and controlling a teammate looks useless too as they should be helping you anyway and in some cases you can even see their cards and discuss strategy with them (Two-Headed Giant, Archenemy, or any other shared turn variant). The exile clause is just mandatory on this kind of cards. I don't think this would see play in limited, even though it could be useful to break a stall (just control your opponent and make them attack right into your hopefully bigger creatures), or even competitive constructed (eight mana is just too much). Where this shines, though, is free-for-all multiplayer formats. Overloading this is just backbreaking with multiple opponents, definitely worth nine mana in three colors. Anyway, Mindslaver effects are notoriously unfun, at least in casual. I'd say in constructed too when pushed too far... I think Emrakul might have something to say about this...
Creativity (1.5/3) Uniqueness - As I've just mentioned, Mindslaver and most of all Worst Fears already exist. Despite how original this feels, it's really just a twist on that effect. (3/3) Flavor - Perfect. This spell is definitely something Bolas would cast, in fact something like this was supposed to be its original planeswalker card ultimate, before getting passed to Sorin Markov. The flavor text also manages to tell a whole story in a single sentence: what would happen if Bolas invaded Ravnica? And honestly, who says that's not actually his plan in the real story, sending his Eternals through the Planar Bridge to invade Ravnica because of its "planeswalker hub" status? Let's remember he has already had affairs on Ravnica in the past...
Polish (2.5/3) Quality - The Saxon genitive form keeps the "s" when the name is singular (example in Magic: Rakdos's Return), so this card should be called Bolas's Dominion (-0.5 for mild grammar mistake). (2/2) Main Challenge - Good. (2/2) Subchallenges - Both met.
Total: 20.5/25
Bolas' Monologue3UU
Enchantment (R)
At the beginning of your upkeep, exile the top card of each opponent's library. Then, you may cast an instant or sorcery card exiled with Bolas' Monologue or a Bolas planeswalker and you may spend mana as though it were mana of any color to cast it. "You see, I wanted you to do all those things. It was all a part of a greater plan…"
— Nicol Bolas
Design (2.5/3) Appeal - Timmy likes how this plays and the thrill of seeing what the top card of his opponent's library is. I feel like this only hitting opponents is not the best thing for Johnny. Spike likes stealing cards from his opponents, it's kind of like getting card advantage in a way. (3/3) Elegance - Not too long and certainly easy enough to understand.
Development (3/3) Viability - No problems with color pie or rarity. (2/3) Balance - Two things immediately took my attention: 1- "or a Bolas planeswalker": I really feel like this wants to be followed by "you control". I don't think you want this card to allow you to cast cards your opponent exiled with their own, say, Nicol Bolas, God-Pharaoh, both for balance and for flavor. 2- "mana of any color": this means you can't have it be colorless, so you wouldn't be able to cast one of the Eldrazi from OGW that require colorless mana, for example Reality Smasher. I really feel like you would want this to be "mana of any type", so that it could be colorless too. That's also the direction real Magic is taking after OGW, check for example Gonti, Lord of Luxury and Vizier of the Menagerie versus Daxos of Meletis, Psychic Intrusion and a lot of other cards printed before OGW. Oath of Nissa is in OGW but says "color" because it's restricted to planeswalker cards, and there are none actually that require colorless mana. Both colorless planeswalkers that actually exist (Karn and Ugin) only require generic mana, not specifically colorless (aka the difference between 1 and C). As for playability, the lack of a specified duration makes this much more playable than it would be otherwise, as you don't have to cast the card right away like it happens, for example, with impulsive draw in red. I expect this to be playable in limited, but the card having to be an instant or sorcery hurts in competitive constructed. I can definitely see this card being liked in casual constructed though, and it's also very interesting in multiplayer. Exiling multiple cards a turn makes much more likely that you will hit at least one instant or sorcery to steal. It's also amazing how all cards this round play into the "steal resources from your opponent" design space. I guess that's just what Bolas does.
Creativity (2.5/3) Uniqueness - Caring about cards exiled by other cards in addition to itself feels very original. There have been cards in the past playing in similar space though. (3/3) Flavor - Perfect in this regard. The name is spot on (we just saw Bolas doing quite some monologue in the last HOU story...) and the flavor text is not only something Bolas would definitely say but it's also true in-story with the relationship between Bolas and the very formation of the Gatewatch.
Polish (2/3) Quality - The Saxon genitive form keeps the "s" when the name is singular (example in Magic: Rakdos's Return), so this card should be called Bolas's Monologue (-0.5 for mild grammar mistake). Two very minor mistakes that together make -0.5: the only time "then" if followed by a comma in black border is when there is an "if" or "for" clause right afterwards (I searched Gatherer for all instances of "Then, " with the comma in Oracle text and there are only four results: Jalum Grifter doesn't count because it's silver-bordered, the other three are Calming Verse, Raging River and Rhystic Study) and there should be no space between the long dash and the flavor text attribution (there are plenty of examples in modern-era Magic sets, HOU too of course, let's say Puncturing Blow just to mention one). (2/2) Main Challenge - Good. (2/2) Subchallenges - Both met.
Total: 22/25
willows: 22
The_Hittite: 20.5
admirableadmiral: 19.5
Jimmy Groove: 14
MCC - Winner (6): Oct 2014, Apr Nov 2017, Jan 2018, Apr Jun 2019 || Host (15): Dec 2014, Apr Jul Aug Dec 2015, Mar Jul Aug Oct 2016, Feb Jul 2017, Jun Nov 2018, Feb Jul 2019 (last one here) || Judge (34): every month from Nov 2014 to Nov 2016 except Oct 2015, every month from Feb to Jul 2017 except Apr 2017, then Oct 2017, May Jun Nov 2018, Feb Jul 2019 (last one here) CCL - Winner (3): Jul 2016 (tied with Flatline), May 2017, Jul 2019 (last one here) || Host (5): Feb 2015, Mar Apr May Jun 2016 DCC - Winner (1): Mar 2015 (tied with Piar) || Host (3): May Oct 2015, Jan 2016
• The two public custom sets I've been part a part of the design team for: "Brotherhood of Ormos" - Blog post with all info - set thread - design skeleton / card list || "Extinctia: Homo Evanuit" - Blog post with all info - set thread - card list spreadsheet
• "The Lion's Lair", my article series about MTG and custom card design in particular. Latest article here. Here is the article index.Rather outdated by now, and based on the old MCC rubric, but I'm leaving this here for anybody that might be interested anyway.
• My only public attempt at being a writer: the story of my Leonin custom planeswalker Jeff Lionheart. (I have a very big one that I'm working on right now but that's private for now, and I don't know if I will ever actually publish it, and I also have ideas for multiple future ones, including one where I'm going to reprise Jeff.)
Bolas’ Dominion6BB
Sorcery [M]
You control target opponent during his or her next turn. Exile Bolas’ Dominion.
Overload 7UBR(You may cast this spell for its overload cost. If you do, change its text by replacing all instances of "target" with "each.") The surviving guilds were given a choice: kneel before Bolas or be knelt.
Design - (2/3) Appeal: Timmy loves this card very much; controlling an entire multiplayer table for a whole round of turns is the sort of unforgettable experience that can last for years to come.
This is an effectively expressive card for Johnny. However, the self-exile resolution text prevents this card from ever realizing its full combo potential.
This card is simply far too expensive for Spike. (2/3) Elegance: Mindslaver effects are inelegant by their very nature. Around a multiplayer table, multiple mindslaver effects are each, by their very nature, very inelegant.
Development - (2.5/3) Viability: Mindslaver effects have definitively deemed to be Black (see Worst Fears), and I see no problem with the colors chosen for the mana cost of the Overload version. The chosen rarity of Mythic Rare for this card is absolutely perfect.
However, my fellow judge, Rocco, brings up a poignant viability concern. Where in the Multiverse could this card ever see actual print? Surely not a Standard-legal set. Commander is also likely not an option either due to this card not having the potential to exist as a commander despite existing as a Mythic Rare. Perhaps something akin to Conspiracy? (1.5/3) Balance: As previously discussed, my fellow judges have deemed this card to be a worse Worst Fears. However, let us be honest, this card is not interested in Standard; this card is interested in multiplayer. Therefore, one should judge this card with multiplayer in mind, rather than the usual Standard and Modern.
In all honesty (and as a Spike myself this realization has terrified me), the overload cost on this card should either be eleven or twelve mana total. This is mainly because the option to target a single opponent around the table exists regardless and can still be game-winning all on its own.
Furthermore, since the majority of multiplayer formats are more casual and focused on the fun, I inevitably have to bring up just how unfun this effect is to play against. It is even worse that everyone else other than the caster may have to play against this effect. The cruelty of such effects was an important contributing factor as to why Emrakul, the Promised End was eventually banned from Standard.
Creativity - (1.5/3) Uniqueness:Worst Fears meets Bolas. (3/3) Flavor: Ever since my previous blunder this month, I have recently taken the time to read the entirety of the Amonkhet story and the Hour of Devastation story for the purposes of properly judging the rest of this month's contest that followed. Without doing so, I could not have given this card the perfect score for this criterion that I also believe that it rightfully deserves. My fellow judges have explained why this card deserves such better than I could. Otherwise, I shall refrain from spoilers.
Polish - (2/3) Quality: Singular possessives ending in S sometimes receive another S after the apostrophe, but this can also be grammatically omitted (which I actually often do myself in my own writing).
In the first sentence of the rules text, "his or her" should surely be 'that player's' instead (minus half a point).
My fellow judge, Rocco, brought up an excellent point regarding the possibility of reminder text on this card. To elaborate, both Worst Fears and Mindslaver have reminder text, while Emrakul, the Promised End does not have reminder text for this effect. Mythic Rare cards can technically eschew reminder text at all times, but it seems far too weird to me that the reminder text for overload has been included here while the reminder text for the much more complicated effect of the two has not been included under these specific circumstances (minus half a point). (2/2) Main Challenge: Main challenge met! (2/2) Subchallenges: Both subchallenges met!
Total: 18.5/25
Final thoughts: While my fellow judges have disagreed as to whether or not this properly serves as a signature spell for Bolas, I am inclined to believe that it does meet the main challenge enough to merit both points for the criterion.
In Bolas' Claw3UU
Enchantment - Aura (R)
Enchant creature
You control enchanted creature.
Sacrifice enchanted creature, BR: Enchanted creature deals damage equal to its power to it's owner. That player discards that many cards.
While searching your library, you may cast In Bolas' Claw if you control a Bolas planeswalker. Those who oppose Bolas must be afraid even of their own allies, because none are safe from his influence.
Design - (3/3) Appeal: Both Spike and Johnny love the toolbox of this card's rules text so much that Timmy's somewhat lukewarm opinion by comparison is honestly rather irrelevant. (0/3) Elegance: While I personally like the difference between control and ownership being highlighted by this card (which also feels very Bolas), it does constitute an inelegance for many players.
This card's fourth line of rules text is heavy enough on the rules as to constitute a major inelegance, infamy aside.
Finally, this card seems as though it were stapled or mixed together out of other cards rather than mechanically connected or elegantly woven. Attributing as powerful of a flavor as Bolas's to a card can still only do so much to provide context.
Development - (0.5/3) Viability: This card is definitely Blue, and the activated ability of this card is definitely Black and Red (and not Black or Red). However, this card surely should have been a Mythic Rare.
Furthermore, the total text of this card fills nine lines in all, which is not ideal and constitutes a minor viability concern. The flavor text would likely have to be cut down the line.
I also sincerely doubt that any card with the infamous rules text of Panglacial Wurm shall ever see official print ever again (and I do not mean the trample). (0/3) Balance: Firstly, this card is a strictly better Mind Control with three upsides. Hence, I believe that this card has three upsides too many. Furthermore, the card itself is not just undercosted, but the activated ability is also undercosted. Admittedly, the fourth line of rules is often little more than mere trinket text, due to the two very specific conditions.
Truthfully, the nail-driving reminder that hit me personally relating to this card's balance, or lack thereof, was how truly miserable this card would be to play against, especially among casual players. Perhaps not quite on the levels of Worst Fears miserable, but miserable enough to play against that it would undermine the point of Magic, which is to be a fun game first and foremost.
Creativity - (2.5/3) Uniqueness: There likely will only ever be one Panglacial Wurm, but I admit that this card is almost there in terms of uniqueness. Almost. (1.5/3) Flavor: The card name is absolutely fantastic. The flavor text is completely unnecessary in all honesty, and it seems very forced as well.
Polish - (0/3) Quality (2/2) Main Challenge: Main challenge met! (2/2) Subchallenges: Both subchallenges met!
Total: 11.5/25
Final thought: If you are interested in my reasonings for the quality score pertaining to this card, please feel free to send me a PM.
Bolas's TreacheryRR
Enchantment [R]
Whenever you gain control of a permanent from another player, Bolas's Treachery deals 3 damage to that player. You may sacrifice that permanent at the beginning of the next end step. 3RR: Gain control of target creature until end of turn. Untap it. It gains haste until end of turn. At the beginning of the next end step, sacrifice Bolas's Treachery. Activate this ability only any time you could cast a sorcery.
Design - (1/3) Appeal: Timmy ends up disliking this card as it does nothing initially and only becomes exciting later but only for a single turn. Delayed gratifications that are temporary are not Timmy's favorites.
Johnny can definitely build a deck around this card.
Spike does not like the weighted mana cost nor the inherent predictability of this card. (1.5/3) Elegance: Two delayed sacrifice effects put together lead to two minor inelegances. Two effects that affect the board state that both trigger 'at the beginning of the next end step', with the first being optional and the second being mandatory, lead to another minor quibble for me (although this may just be a personal pet peeve rather than anything of importance).
Development - (2.5/3) Viability: This card checks a lot of boxes for Red. The rarity of Rare also seems correct.
However, this card possesses nine lines worth of rules text, which constitutes a minor viability concern. (2/3) Balance: This card is not noteworthy regarding Limited, which Rares are allowed to be, so I shall focus this balance score primarily regarding Constructed.
The theoretical deck that would be constructed around this card actually seems fairly alright. Definitely not anything meta-defining, but for the time being supportable at the very least.
However, it should be noted that effects that change control are awfully unfun to play against, and this card is entirely based around an even harsher variant of that effect as well.
Creativity - (3/3) Uniqueness: Simply put, 'Whenever you gain control of a permanent from another player' has never been used as a trigger for an ability before. Congratulations. (2/3) Flavor: This card's name is quite serviceable. No room for flavor text.
The mechanical flavor presented here may well have fared better if this card did not sacrifice itself as part of its second ability (in fact, that actually does not seem like Bolas' style at all, to be perfectly honest).
Polish - (3/3) Quality: Perfect! (2/2) Main Challenge: Main challenge met! (2/2) Subchallenges: Both subchallenges met!
Total: 19/25
Final thoughts: My one final thought on this card is that the mana cost is awfully weird. Truth be told, this is one of those weird cards where the cost of the activated ability matters a lot more than the actual mana cost.
Bolas' Monologue3UU
Enchantment (R)
At the beginning of your upkeep, exile the top card of each opponent's library. Then, you may cast an instant or sorcery card exiled with Bolas' Monologue or a Bolas planeswalker and you may spend mana as though it were mana of any color to cast it. "You see, I wanted you to do all those things. It was all a part of a greater plan…"
— Nicol Bolas
Design - (1.5/3) Appeal: Timmy kind of likes this card as it can definitely create those memorable moments against one's opponent(s), but it can also end up disappointingly doing nothing.
Johnny somewhat likes this card as he would prefer to use his own deck to express himself, if possible, rather than an adversary's.
Spike is appealed to by this interesting sort of draw engine, yet it is also quite match-up dependent. (3/3) Elegance: Perhaps Bolas' own monologues lack elegance (can we get to the bloody point already?), but this card of yours most certainly does not.
Development - (2/3) Viability: This is an acceptable bend in Blue for various good reasons. I believe that a rarity of Rare for this card is also be correct.
However, this card is not without viability concerns. Firstly, as my fellow judges have also designated, this card's rules text should include the following pair of words 'you control' after the words "or a Bolas planeswalker". Otherwise, players might have to start tracking cards that were also never officially intended to be tracked, which becomes especially nightmarish should the corner cases involved ever come to pass. I also doubt that this change would meaningfully impact the power level of this card.
Secondly, as bravelion83 invaluably mentioned, this card's rules text should use the word 'type' in place of the word "color", since colorless mana is not a color of mana but is instead a type of mana. Perhaps a couple of examples might aid in explaining this particular concern. While there are no sorceries that use C in their mana cost, there are two instants that do (which also validates this viability concern significantly): Spatial Contortion and Warping Wail. With the word "color" instead of 'type', if you do not control a land (or other source of mana) that produces C, you could not cast either of these spells, despite how they would otherwise have been (for the sake of this thought experiment) exiled by this card (or a Bolas planeswalker) satisfactorily.
Both of the above viability concerns are minor ones. Admittedly, there is technically nothing wrong qualitatively with either of these quibbles. (2.5/3) Balance: I suppose that this card is potentially playable in Limited, although I would be loathe to draft it (which speaks more about my specific Limited style of play than this specific card).
However, where this card truly shines is in Constructed, especially multiplayer. However, this card lacks the consistency to make much of anything competitive (especially when compared to Nicol Bolas, God-Pharaoh himself), but it does seem like quite a lot of casual fun...for yourself, anyway. Having an opponent's spells turned against them is not quite as unhealthful as taking control of an opponent's permanents, but it is somewhat unhealthful nonetheless. After much thought, that might be the only relevant balance problem that I have with this card in particular.
Creativity - (2.5/3) Uniqueness: I honestly am not sure about this score; I only know that similar cards have been printed in the past but not that many. This feels original without being revolutionary. (2.5/3) Flavor: The card name is functional; the flavor text is suitable (plus the emphasis is definitely welcome for livening it up). It is just that these mechanics are not quite the perfect fit for this rather specific flavor. Truthfully, the parts are all there for a perfect score, it is just that I would recommend some more fine-tuning here and there before then.
Polish - (2/3) Quality: Singular possessives ending in S sometimes receive another S after the apostrophe, but this can also be grammatically omitted (which I actually often do myself in my own writing).
For the second sentence within the first (and only) line of rules text, the comma after the word "then" should be nixed (minus half a point).
There should be no space between the long dash and the name "Nicol Bolas" in the flavor text (minus half a point). Thank you for utilizing the correct long dash! (2/2) Main Challenge: Main challenge met! (2/2) Subchallenges: Both subchallenges met!
Total: 20/25
Final thoughts: As bad of a mechanic as fateseal is, it does synergize quite nicely with this one card in particular.
Also, bloody hells, this particular card of yours was quite the absolute pain for me to judge accurately, especially while fatigued from being under the weather. Nevertheless, no lasting harm has been done, thankfully!
MCC - Winner (6): Oct 2014, Apr Nov 2017, Jan 2018, Apr Jun 2019 || Host (15): Dec 2014, Apr Jul Aug Dec 2015, Mar Jul Aug Oct 2016, Feb Jul 2017, Jun Nov 2018, Feb Jul 2019 (last one here) || Judge (34): every month from Nov 2014 to Nov 2016 except Oct 2015, every month from Feb to Jul 2017 except Apr 2017, then Oct 2017, May Jun Nov 2018, Feb Jul 2019 (last one here) CCL - Winner (3): Jul 2016 (tied with Flatline), May 2017, Jul 2019 (last one here) || Host (5): Feb 2015, Mar Apr May Jun 2016 DCC - Winner (1): Mar 2015 (tied with Piar) || Host (3): May Oct 2015, Jan 2016
• The two public custom sets I've been part a part of the design team for: "Brotherhood of Ormos" - Blog post with all info - set thread - design skeleton / card list || "Extinctia: Homo Evanuit" - Blog post with all info - set thread - card list spreadsheet
• "The Lion's Lair", my article series about MTG and custom card design in particular. Latest article here. Here is the article index.Rather outdated by now, and based on the old MCC rubric, but I'm leaving this here for anybody that might be interested anyway.
• My only public attempt at being a writer: the story of my Leonin custom planeswalker Jeff Lionheart. (I have a very big one that I'm working on right now but that's private for now, and I don't know if I will ever actually publish it, and I also have ideas for multiple future ones, including one where I'm going to reprise Jeff.)
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(This banner is my own elaboration on the art of the card Imminent Doom by Daniel Ljunggren.)
July MCC Round 4 (Finals)
"The Return of the God-Pharaoh"
This month we're going to focus on the mechanics and flavor of HOU. It's literally just yesterday that we've seen Nicol Bolas defeating the Gatewatch, so it feels like the right time for us to pay tribute to
our new Dragon overlord... Ehm... I mean, to the winner of the fight on Amonkhet. Nothing more. Of course...Main challenge: Design a signature spell for Nicol Bolas. It can't be a land. Please see clarifications. "Either he would have deaths, screams, and blood, or he would, perhaps, have something better."
Subchallenge 1: The card is not a creature. "Miserable lives that would soon have ended anyway ended just a bit sooner, with a touch more violence."
Subchallenge 2: The card has a monocolored mana cost. It can have offcolor mana symbols in its rules text. "But fire, against a dragon? A dragon. I have standards."
Main Challenge
A "signature spell" is one strongly associated with the specific planeswalker, either because the character casts it him or herself or because of other flavor reasons (sometimes mechanical reasons too). Ideally, it should contain the character's name in the card name. The following cycles from M11, M12 and M13 are provided as reference. What I expect from you this round is something like this, but for Bolas (yes, ignoring the fact that it already happened in M13, we're looking for a new card here).
Subchallenge 1
Should be self-explanatory. Your card does not have the creature card type. No artifact creatures, enchantment creatures, or such.
Subchallenge 2
Pay attention: this time we're only caring about mana cost, not color identity for once. This means that this time you CAN have off-color mana symbols in the rules text, including mana symbols of any kind, such as hybrid mana or Phyrexian mana.
Feel free to ask any additional questions you might have in the discussion thread.
A friendly reminder I left everyone a few months ago but it's still valid:
(The link to the forum rules has been fixed as of August 2nd 2017.)
(X/3) Appeal: Do the different player psychographics (Timmy/Johhny/Spike) have a use for the card?
(X/3) Elegance: Is the card easily understandable at a glance? Do all the flavor and mechanics combined as a whole make sense?
Development -
(X/3) Viability: How well does the card fit into the color wheel? Does it break or bend the rules of the game? Is it the appropriate rarity?
(X/3) Balance: Does the card have a power level appropriate for contemporary constructed/limited environments without breaking them? Does it play well in casual and multiplayer formats? Does it create or fit into a deck/archetype? Does it create an oppressive environment?
Creativity -
(X/3) Uniqueness: Has a card like this ever been printed before? Does it use new mechanics, ideas, or design space? Does it combine old ideas in a new way? Overall, does it feel “fresh”?
(X/3) Flavor: Does the name seem realistic for a card? Does the flavor text sound professional? Do all the flavor elements synch together to please Vorthos players?
Polish -
(X/3) Quality: Points deducted for incorrect spelling, grammar, and templating.
(X/2) *Main Challenge: Was the main challenge satisfied? Was it approached in a unique or interesting way? Does the card fit the intent of the challenge?
(X/2) Subchallenges: One point awarded per satisfied subchallenge condition.
Total: X/25
*An entry with 0 points here is subject to disqualification.
DEADLINES
Design deadline: Monday, July 31st 2017 23:59 EDT
Judging deadline: Friday, August 4th 2017 23:59 EDT
JUDGES
bravelion83
StonerOfKruphix
Rocco
Blydden
PLAYERS
admirableadmiral
Jimmy Groove
The_Hittite
willows
Only the above players are allowed to submit a card. To everyone else, better luck next month!
This is the final round, so every judge will judge every card and the player who gets the highest combined score will be our MCC champion for this month.
MCC - Winner (6): Oct 2014, Apr Nov 2017, Jan 2018, Apr Jun 2019 || Host (15): Dec 2014, Apr Jul Aug Dec 2015, Mar Jul Aug Oct 2016, Feb Jul 2017, Jun Nov 2018, Feb Jul 2019 (last one here) || Judge (34): every month from Nov 2014 to Nov 2016 except Oct 2015, every month from Feb to Jul 2017 except Apr 2017, then Oct 2017, May Jun Nov 2018, Feb Jul 2019 (last one here)
CCL - Winner (3): Jul 2016 (tied with Flatline), May 2017, Jul 2019 (last one here) || Host (5): Feb 2015, Mar Apr May Jun 2016
DCC - Winner (1): Mar 2015 (tied with Piar) || Host (3): May Oct 2015, Jan 2016
• The two public custom sets I've been part a part of the design team for:
"Brotherhood of Ormos" - Blog post with all info - set thread - design skeleton / card list || "Extinctia: Homo Evanuit" - Blog post with all info - set thread - card list spreadsheet
• "The Lion's Lair", my article series about MTG and custom card design in particular. Latest article here. Here is the article index. Rather outdated by now, and based on the old MCC rubric, but I'm leaving this here for anybody that might be interested anyway.
• My only public attempt at being a writer: the story of my Leonin custom planeswalker Jeff Lionheart. (I have a very big one that I'm working on right now but that's private for now, and I don't know if I will ever actually publish it, and I also have ideas for multiple future ones, including one where I'm going to reprise Jeff.)
Sorcery [M]
You control target opponent during his or her next turn. Exile Bolas’ Dominion.
Overload 7UBR (You may cast this spell for its overload cost. If you do, change its text by replacing all instances of "target" with "each.")
The surviving guilds were given a choice: kneel before Bolas or be knelt.
Enchantment - Aura (R)
Enchant creature
You control enchanted creature.
Sacrifice enchanted creature, BR: Enchanted creature deals damage equal to its power to it's owner. That player discards that many cards.
While searching your library, you may cast In Bolas' Claw if you control a Bolas planeswalker.
Those who oppose Bolas must be afraid even of their own allies, because none are safe from his influence.
Enchantment [R]
Whenever you gain control of a permanent from another player, Bolas's Treachery deals 3 damage to that player. You may sacrifice that permanent at the beginning of the next end step.
3RR: Gain control of target creature until end of turn. Untap it. It gains haste until end of turn. At the beginning of the next end step, sacrifice Bolas's Treachery. Activate this ability only any time you could cast a sorcery.
Enchantment (R)
At the beginning of your upkeep, exile the top card of each opponent's library. Then, you may cast an instant or sorcery card exiled with Bolas' Monologue or a Bolas planeswalker and you may spend mana as though it were mana of any color to cast it.
"You see, I wanted you to do all those things. It was all a part of a greater plan…"
— Nicol Bolas
Judges, let's try to make it in a few days if possible, thanks.
MCC - Winner (6): Oct 2014, Apr Nov 2017, Jan 2018, Apr Jun 2019 || Host (15): Dec 2014, Apr Jul Aug Dec 2015, Mar Jul Aug Oct 2016, Feb Jul 2017, Jun Nov 2018, Feb Jul 2019 (last one here) || Judge (34): every month from Nov 2014 to Nov 2016 except Oct 2015, every month from Feb to Jul 2017 except Apr 2017, then Oct 2017, May Jun Nov 2018, Feb Jul 2019 (last one here)
CCL - Winner (3): Jul 2016 (tied with Flatline), May 2017, Jul 2019 (last one here) || Host (5): Feb 2015, Mar Apr May Jun 2016
DCC - Winner (1): Mar 2015 (tied with Piar) || Host (3): May Oct 2015, Jan 2016
• The two public custom sets I've been part a part of the design team for:
"Brotherhood of Ormos" - Blog post with all info - set thread - design skeleton / card list || "Extinctia: Homo Evanuit" - Blog post with all info - set thread - card list spreadsheet
• "The Lion's Lair", my article series about MTG and custom card design in particular. Latest article here. Here is the article index. Rather outdated by now, and based on the old MCC rubric, but I'm leaving this here for anybody that might be interested anyway.
• My only public attempt at being a writer: the story of my Leonin custom planeswalker Jeff Lionheart. (I have a very big one that I'm working on right now but that's private for now, and I don't know if I will ever actually publish it, and I also have ideas for multiple future ones, including one where I'm going to reprise Jeff.)
I found myself being more critical than in prior rounds, which I suppose could be appropriate for a final. Apologies for the low scores, but at least everyone got the same Darth Rocco treatment.
Sorcery [M]
You control target opponent during his or her next turn. Exile Bolas’ Dominion.
Overload 7UBR (You may cast this spell for its overload cost. If you do, change its text by replacing all instances of "target" with "each.")
The surviving guilds were given a choice: kneel before Bolas or be knelt.
Design -
(2/3) Appeal: Timmy is considering building another EDH deck JUST to put this card in it. I think he'll be disappointed by how things play out if he ever overloads it, but for now, he's in love. Johnny likes the meta-game of figuring out how to reliably cast this, but prefers his expensive combo payoffs to be more open-and-shut game winners. Spike is drooling at the potential to control entire rounds of EDH, but isn't holding his breath that this will ever get cast.
(2/3) Elegance: I'm a bit torn on this. "Control target player" and Overload are some of the most inelegant mechanics on their own, but this is as straightforward and clever an implementation of them as could be expected.
Development -
(1.5/3) Viability: The main effect is definitely black. If the overload cost were also monoblack, I'd expect it to cost more than just mana, but making it Grixis sidesteps this. Blue and red are the other "gain control" colors, and this IS a Bolas-themed card, so it all checks out, color-wise. No rules are broken, and it couldn't be anything other than mythic. This would never be printed in a Standard-legal set, and I'm not sure Wizards would print a big, bombastic story-related mythic in a Commander Series precon that ISN'T a legendary creature. Actually, no non-creature mythics have been printed in a commander release except for the planeswalkers that can be commanders.
(3/3) Balance: Worst Fears is undeniably a powerful card, but it actually saw hardly any competitive play (especially in Standard). Since this card is just "Worse Worst Fears" in two-player formats, it's essentially unplayable except in multiplayer (and really, only in Highlander variants like Commander). Because it's a multiplayer-focused design, being strictly worse than its non-overload-able counterpart isn't so much an issue. The balance is just about perfect for Commander, though other multiplayer formats not so much. I almost talked myself into deducting points here, but all of these gripes are actually viability-related. I compromised with a 0.5 point deduction in that category.
Creativity -
(2.5/3) Uniqueness: The main effect isn't anything new, or even used in a unique way on its own. Overload is an existing mechanic, and has no new implementations here. But taken together, the result is an effect that hasn't been seen before. I do like the creative use of old tools.
(3/3) Flavor: Yeah, that's very Bolas. Name fits the mechanics great, and flavor text builds meaning into the card using simple, evocative storytelling.
Polish -
(1.5/3) Quality: Singular possessives ending in S normally do get the 's at the end, but this isn't the case for ancient names, like Hercules. Bolas is an elder dragon, after all, so no points deducted. The first effect should read, "You control target player during that player's next turn." I know, I know. Sounds weird, but there's precedence (-0.5). Both of those examples are also mythics, and they still include reminder text for this very weird and unintuitive "control target player" mechanic. This should have, too (-1).
(1/2) *Main Challenge: It's definitely Bolas-themed, but the effect is just something we could imagine him doing at some point. It doesn't reference, supplement, or synergize with an existing Bolas planeswalker.
(2/2) Subchallenges: Yup and yup.
Total: 18.5/25
*An entry with 0 points here is subject to disqualification.
Enchantment - Aura (R)
Enchant creature
You control enchanted creature.
Sacrifice enchanted creature, BR: Enchanted creature deals damage equal to its power to it's owner. That player discards that many cards.
While searching your library, you may cast In Bolas' Claw if you control a Bolas planeswalker.
Those who oppose Bolas must be afraid even of their own allies, because none are safe from his influence.
Design -
(3/3) Appeal: Timmy will gladly overlook the steep color requirements and the "sac controlled creature" clause in order to cast this as often as possible forever. There are like six things about this card Johnny is pretty sure he can break wide open. Spike is looking forward to showing both of them how this card should REALLY be played. So much opportunity for synergy! It's like three different cards all in the same slot. If it were possible, I'd give this a 4 or 4.5 for Appeal.
(0/3) Elegance: You're combining some very unusual and unrelated mechanics here. They feel completely disjointed from each other, and would even be a bit confusing on their own. This card essentially has two modes: "You control target creature" and "Destroy target creature, then ***** hits the fan." And yes, sometimes you'll end up keeping the creature around, then saccing it later. As much as I generally like non-obvious design like that, it feels swingy and clumsy here. (Full disclosure — I've had points deducted for using the Panglacial Wurm ability, too. If it were just that, it might be OK.)
Development -
(1.5/3) Viability: Color wheel is fine. Each effect is solidly within the colors of its cost. There's so much going on, and it would usually result in such huge life swings and hand disruption that this absolutely needed to be mythic. The line between rare and mythic rare isn't always well-defined, but this card isn't anywhere near that line. No rules are explicitly broken, but the "unwritten rules" are being walked all over (See Balance).
(0/3) Balance: This is INSANE. It's a Mind Control with no less than THREE huge upsides that are each arguably stronger than the "Control enchanted creature" ability (The last ability is obviously dependent on the first, but you take my meaning). Just like... daaaaaang, Jimmy my man.
Creativity -
(2/3) Uniqueness: The first half of Cruel Ultimatum has never been an aura before, so that's something, heh heh. The "steal then sac for value" effect isn't NEW, per se, though we don't usually expect to see the best of both of those effects printed on the same card. Imbalanced as that is, it's a fun attempt at an explosive, flavorful rare. And the Panglacial Wurm ability is interesting here.
(1.5/3) Flavor: Just considering the imagery of the abilities, they do feel very Bolas-like — very "inevitable". I actually adore that the card depicts an insignificant hero being literally grabbed by an elder dragon and flung at the actually-worthy enemy. It's so great. The problem with this is that it works so well under a literal translation of the name of the card that the flavor text falls very flat. If being "in Bolas' claw" is only supposed to be metaphorical, as the flavor text implies, then it mars the fantastic mechanical flavor of the rest of the card. On a more minor note, a single claw isn't really capable of grabbing things. The name should be "In Bolas' Claws"
Polish -
(.5/3) Quality: Singular possessives ending in S normally do get the 's at the end, but this isn't the case for ancient names, like Hercules. Bolas is an elder dragon, after all, so no points deducted. The mana cost of the sac ability should precede the non-mana cost (-0.5). The second "its" in the same ability contains an erroneous apostrophe (-0.5). The final ability isn't a replacement effect, and shouldn't use the word "if". (-1) There should also be an extra "your", as-per the only printed example of this effect (-0.5). All said, it should read, "As long as you control a Bolas planeswalker, while you're searching your library, you may cast ~ from your library."
(2/2) *Main Challenge: Little bit clumsy in its interaction with Bolas, but the flavor of the ability makes up for it.
(2/2) Subchallenges: Yup and Yessir
Total: 12.5/25
*An entry with 0 points here is subject to disqualification.
Enchantment [R]
Whenever you gain control of a permanent from another player, Bolas's Treachery deals 3 damage to that player. You may sacrifice that permanent at the beginning of the next end step.
3RR: Gain control of target creature until end of turn. Untap it. It gains haste until end of turn. At the beginning of the next end step, sacrifice Bolas's Treachery. Activate this ability only any time you could cast a sorcery.
Design -
(1.5/3) Appeal: Timmy doesn't like sacrificing things for incremental value, especially things he had to invest so much into obtaining, but if he figures out this is literally a Slave of Bolas glued to a Lava Spike, he might come around. Johnny's all over this, as it has significant combo potential. Spike sees a do-nothing 2-drop that forces him into red. it also would cause him to reveal his plan pretty far in advance, and he prefers playing his cards closer to his chest... um, so to speak.
(1/3) Elegance: The first ability on its own is already a bit awkward, both because of its relative obscurity and the delayed triggered ability that that also has a "may" clause. Then, its interplay with the second ability caused me to second-guess whether I had even read it correctly. The actual way it interacts with the second ability is a bit different than I thought by reading it the first time. The second ability also subverts expectations on its own, due to a departure from the usual ending to this style of effect. You'd expect it to force the sacrifice of the stolen creature, but it sacs itself instead. As a whole, once the card is fully comprehended, I actually do like how everything fits together. It's just laid out in a discombobulating way.
Development -
(2/3) Viability: This is mostly fine, color-wise, though one of its spiritual predecessors is more black than red. It's definitely too weird to be uncommon, and probably not powerful enough for mythic, so the rarity's good. Why could this not have said "Whenever you gain control of a creature an opponent owns...?" limiting it to creatures you take control of while they're already on the battlefield closes off a lot of fun possible interactions. It wouldn't be game-breaking to let this combo with the likes of Deadeye Navigator or Grave Betrayal. There doesn't seem to be a good enough reason to quote a 15-year-old card with the only existing instance of this wording (It's not that big a deal, just a minor gripe).
2.5/3) Balance: The end result of this card, minus any incidental value from the first ability, is the same as casting Lava Spike followed by Slave of Bolas. That would cost only a mana less than this card, which lets you spread the cost out as well as having the possibility of exploiting its first ability. I don't think it would mess up the strategy if its mana cost was 2R instead of RR. In limited, the first ability won't often be relevant, but it COULD get out of hand in eternal formats. In EDH, not many cards that sound like they'd work with this actually would (For instance, Thieves' Auction doesn't interact with the first ability, since no player controls cards in exile). However, there are some that would combo with this in ridiculous ways: Molten Primordial, Mass Mutiny, Scrambleverse...
Creativity -
(1.5/3) Uniqueness: Its component elements are combined in an artful way, and the damage trigger from stealing creatures is uncommon enough to warrant calling it "unique-ish". However, as mentioned a few times now, most of the time, this card's effect will be that of Lava Spike followed by Slave of Bolas, with wording borrowed from Risky Move. Knowing that rather dulls my enjoyment of an otherwise creative design.
(2/3) Flavor: Everything is mostly great. All the elements work towards a common flavor goal, which is indeed very Bolas-like. I'm not taking a point for the lack of flavor text, as the mechanical flavor is almost strong enough to carry the card on its own. But the final clause of the card's second ability that causes you to sacrifice itself seems like it was included purely out of mechanical necessity. Since the card is relying entirely on mechanical flavor, it's quite jarring from a fluff perspective.
Polish -
(3/3) Quality: At first glance I THOUGHT I would be docking you for the "from another player" phrase, but it's definitely Oracle-sanctioned terminology. I give you a hundred style points for making such a risky move by referencing Risky Move. You've chosen the classically correct possessive form of Bolas (singular names ending in S get the 's treatment), though Wizards has shied away from printing his name in the possessive so far, so it's impossible to know which form they'd choose. Everything is fine here.
(2/2) *Main Challenge: It has cool synergy with OG Bolas, but I call foul on using an existing card with "Bolas" in the name as a framework for designing a new Bolas signature spell.
(2/2) Subchallenges: Yes and Affirmative
Total: 17.5/25
*An entry with 0 points here is subject to disqualification.
Enchantment (R)
At the beginning of your upkeep, exile the top card of each opponent's library. Then, you may cast an instant or sorcery card exiled with Bolas' Monologue or a Bolas planeswalker and you may spend mana as though it were mana of any color to cast it.
"You see, I wanted you to do all those things. It was all a part of a greater plan…"
— Nicol Bolas
Design -
(2/3) Appeal: Timmy's in love. Johnny knows this is unreliable and very dependent on the matchup. Spike loves the idea of killing opponents with their own weapons, but the critical mass of value is just too hard to get to for this to be competitive enough for him. All three would gladly play this in EDH, but not necessarily because it "speaks" to them. I think this is worth a collective point.
(3/3) Elegance: Everything flows nicely and makes perfect sense. There's an issue with the "Bolas planeswalker" clause, but it doesn't really detract from the elegance of the card.
Development -
(0/3) Viability: Blue CAN get this opponent's-top-card exile effect, but not often, and only by jumping through some hoops (See: Mindreaver, Grimoire Thief, Daxos of Meletis). Red even has an easier way to get this effect (See: Grenzo, Havok Raiser). It isn't a huge bend, and wouldn't be a big issue, but it would have made a much more appropriate Grixis-colored card. Seems like it was kept monoblue only because of the stipulations of the challenge. Worded the way you have it, you will be able to cast cards exiled with ANY Bolas walker, not just ones you control(led). If this is an accident, then the design fails to even get off the ground. Assuming this is intended, that's crazy, man! Clever, but crazy. Wizards just wouldn't do this; it's too weird and feel-bad. Additionally, none of the exiling abilities of Nicol Bolas, God-Pharaoh call for remembering which cards they exile; they just go into the generic exile zone. This effect would be damn near impossible to track correctly in most cases. This could and would straight-up brick games.
(2.5/3) Balance: Evaluating the balance of this card is tricky. Near as I can tell, exiling a single card off the top, and being able to cast it with any mana, costs about 1. This card limits you to instants and sorceries, but allows a potentially larger selection. Taking into account the relative unreliability of getting this working with Nicol Bolas, God-Pharaoh, I'm costing its effect at 1.5 mana per opponent, per upkeep. In a two-player game, it would have to stick around for 3 to 4 triggers in order to pay for itself, which is reasonable in most cases (It's basically a bizarro-world, one-of Honden of Seeing Winds, so the cost is even a bit high). In Commander, though, there are more potential hits, and all exiled cards continue to be available to cast with the upkeep trigger. The value increases exponentially, rather than just x4, because you have the potential of hitting multiple instants/sorceries, casting one, and saving the other(s) for later turns. This extra power is balanced by the greater density of enchantment removal in the format, so I think it's just about right in Commander.
Creavity -
(3/3) Uniqueness: As mentioned, similar effects have been printed, but this is different enough, and designed creatively enough, not to feel rehashed.
(1.5/3) Flavor: You're clearly aiming to depict a classic "Evil Genius" speech. The name and flavor text make that pretty explicit. Bolas is a big, scaly puppeteer, pulling everyone's strings behind the scenes. I can dig it. My two complaints are that a) It paints Bolas in the same light as a goofy Bond villain, foolishly explaining his master plan before ensuring the hero can't possibly escape and thwart it. And b) That flavor text is pretty bland. It reads like a rushed draft of an idea for flavor text.
Polish -
(3/3) Quality: Singular possessives ending in S normally do get the 's at the end, but this isn't the case for ancient names, like Hercules. Bolas is an elder dragon, after all, so no points deducted.
(2/2) *Main Challenge: Met. Nice job having this interact with a Bolas planeswalker.
(2/2) Subchallenges: Hai and Si.
Total: 19/25
*An entry with 0 points here is subject to disqualification.
The_Hittite — 18.5
admirableadmiral — 17.5
Jimmy Groove — 12.5
Enchantment [R]
Whenever you gain control of a permanent from another player, Bolas's Treachery deals 3 damage to that player. You may sacrifice that permanent at the beginning of the next end step.
3RR: Gain control of target creature until end of turn. Untap it. It gains haste until end of turn. At the beginning of the next end step, sacrifice Bolas's Treachery. Activate this ability only any time you could cast a sorcery.
Design
(2/3) Appeal - I don't think Timmy would be very interested in this, unlike Johnny, who is very interested. The first ability is very open ended and I think there are a lot of tricks he can do with this card. Spike likes being able to activate the Threaten ability repeatedly in a vacuum, but then he looks at the cost and realizes he will not realistically be able to activate it multiple times before having to sacrifice the enchantment.
(1.5/3) Elegance - Very wordy. Also, "sacrifice this" being a delayed effect of the activated ability rather than a cost feels not so good to me in this area. I feel like "3RR, Sacrifice Bolas's Treachery" would have been much cleaner.
Development
(2.5/3) Viability - No problems with the color pie. I don't have particular problems with this at rare, but I feel like this could (should?) be a mythic too.
(1/3) Balance - In limited, it's essentially an Act of Treason for seven mana (two to cast and five to activate), and if you see it in that way it's essentially unplayable. Stealing permanents doesn't happen as often in limited as to justify this being used there for its first ability. In constructed it looks more playable, but you still need a critical mass of stealing effects that are not exactly cheap in mana usually. A constructed deck built around this looks potentially powerful but very slow, something that might be acceptable in casual but certainly not in competitive formats. Anyway, stealing permanents is a notorious example of an ability that's perceived as unfun by a lot of players, so if you manage to build a deck around this in casual, I don't know how long it will last in your play group. Of course you can never generalize, but I think a lot of casual players wouldn't want to play against such a deck.
Creativity
(3/3) Uniqueness - Having an ability trigger when you gain control of a permanent feels very original and has not been done before if I checked Gatherer correctly.
(2.5/3) Flavor - The name is good and plays very nicely into the Act of Treason space. No flavor text, but the rules text is already nine lines in MSE, so there is really no room for it. Not a big problem.
Polish
(3/3) Quality - My first instinct was that the "from another player" part just had to be wrong, but luckily I have the habit of checking Gatherer before making any call in this area. It turns out Risky Move exists and both its printed text and its Oracle text have the same exact wording you used for that ability, so it's actually good.
(2/2) Main Challenge - Good.
(2/2) Subchallenges - Both met.
Total: 19.5/25
Enchantment - Aura (R)
Enchant creature
You control enchanted creature.
Sacrifice enchanted creature, BR: Enchanted creature deals damage equal to its power to it's owner. That player discards that many cards.
While searching your library, you may cast In Bolas' Claw if you control a Bolas planeswalker.
Those who oppose Bolas must be afraid even of their own allies, because none are safe from his influence.
Design
(2.5/3) Appeal - Timmy has a very asymmetrical experience with this: he likes to play it but hates having it played against. Johnny could use the last two abilities somehow. Spike likes the high powered activated ability that turns this card into straight up removal.
(1/3) Elegance - Wordy and the last ability feels tackled on to me. I don't see any connection to the other abilities. It's not necessarily needed but it would have been nice if the abilities were connected somehow.
Development
(1.5/3) Viability - Mind Control is blue, the activated ability is red (direct damage) and black (discard). The last ability has only been on a green card before, but I can see it in blue too. It's also a known rules nightmare. I feel like this could (should?) be a mythic though.
(1/3) Balance - So for the same cost as the basic Mind Control effect you get two additional upsides, and what upsides! A bunch of damage to the head and discard on top of getting rid of the creature you stole, AND being able to cast this out of, say, a fetchland activation. Honestly, it feels a bit too much to me. I think this should cost at least one mana more than the base effect. As for playability, this is definitely playable in limited. Mind Control effects are usually not very playable in competitive constructed, but I feel like the activated ability is so good that it can change that. This looks very (too?) good in a Grixis control shell, and that's already a Standard playable deck as of now, I'm not sure a further boost is needed. The fetchland thing might have Modern implications too, but I'm afraid it might make casting this a bit too easy. The "its owner" part is relevant in multiplayer. Finally, stealing creature is notoriously not that fun from the other side of the table, especially in casual.
Creativity
(1/3) Uniqueness - Just another twist on Mind Control, and there are a lot of those in esistence. Panglacial Wurm too.
(3/3) Flavor - The name is good and it reminds me of In Garruk's Wake in a way. The flavor text is also quite good.
Polish
(0/3) Quality - The Saxon genitive form keeps the "s" when the name is singular (example in Magic: Rakdos's Return), so this card should be called In Bolas's Claw (-0.5 for mild grammar mistake). In an activated ability, the mana cost always comes before the non-mana costs (-1 for very well known fact). In "its owner" there should be no apostrophe (-1 for serious grammar mistake). The ironic thing, that makes this mistake even worse, is that you just wrote it right two words before ("its power")! In both cases it's a possessive adjective and not a verb, so its right use is without the apostrophe. Finally, Panglacial Wurm says that the last ability should be "While you're searching..." (-0.5), or at least I guess that's what it would say if Wurms could talk!
(2/2) Main Challenge - Good.
(2/2) Subchallenges - Both met.
Total: 14/25
Sorcery [M]
You control target opponent during his or her next turn. Exile Bolas’ Dominion.
Overload 7UBR (You may cast this spell for its overload cost. If you do, change its text by replacing all instances of "target" with "each.")
The surviving guilds were given a choice: kneel before Bolas or be knelt.
Design
(2/3) Appeal - This is a perfect Timmy card, a big spell that lets him experience something that viscerally feels powerful. I don't see anything for Johnny (thank goodness this can't be recurred...) or Spike (he just looks at the costs and moves on).
(3/3) Elegance - Very elegant, short and flavorful. Overloading this also looks intuitive enough.
Development
(3/3) Viability - Controlling a player is black in the color pie, and I can definitely see it in blue too. Red is a stretch, but the Bolas flavor is so strong that this feels like an acceptable bend. Also, you're still requiring blue and black mana to overload, not just red. Mythic is definitely right.
(1.5/3) Balance - I really like the comparison to Worst Fears: same CMC but one more colored mana for the ability to overload it in multiplayer games. There is another difference with this specifying "opponent" rather than "player", but let's be honest: when would you ever target yourself or a teammate with a Mindslaver effect? There's no point in controlling yourself (you always do in theory...), and controlling a teammate looks useless too as they should be helping you anyway and in some cases you can even see their cards and discuss strategy with them (Two-Headed Giant, Archenemy, or any other shared turn variant). The exile clause is just mandatory on this kind of cards. I don't think this would see play in limited, even though it could be useful to break a stall (just control your opponent and make them attack right into your hopefully bigger creatures), or even competitive constructed (eight mana is just too much). Where this shines, though, is free-for-all multiplayer formats. Overloading this is just backbreaking with multiple opponents, definitely worth nine mana in three colors. Anyway, Mindslaver effects are notoriously unfun, at least in casual. I'd say in constructed too when pushed too far... I think Emrakul might have something to say about this...
Creativity
(1.5/3) Uniqueness - As I've just mentioned, Mindslaver and most of all Worst Fears already exist. Despite how original this feels, it's really just a twist on that effect.
(3/3) Flavor - Perfect. This spell is definitely something Bolas would cast, in fact something like this was supposed to be its original planeswalker card ultimate, before getting passed to Sorin Markov. The flavor text also manages to tell a whole story in a single sentence: what would happen if Bolas invaded Ravnica? And honestly, who says that's not actually his plan in the real story, sending his Eternals through the Planar Bridge to invade Ravnica because of its "planeswalker hub" status? Let's remember he has already had affairs on Ravnica in the past...
Polish
(2.5/3) Quality - The Saxon genitive form keeps the "s" when the name is singular (example in Magic: Rakdos's Return), so this card should be called Bolas's Dominion (-0.5 for mild grammar mistake).
(2/2) Main Challenge - Good.
(2/2) Subchallenges - Both met.
Total: 20.5/25
Enchantment (R)
At the beginning of your upkeep, exile the top card of each opponent's library. Then, you may cast an instant or sorcery card exiled with Bolas' Monologue or a Bolas planeswalker and you may spend mana as though it were mana of any color to cast it.
"You see, I wanted you to do all those things. It was all a part of a greater plan…"
— Nicol Bolas
Design
(2.5/3) Appeal - Timmy likes how this plays and the thrill of seeing what the top card of his opponent's library is. I feel like this only hitting opponents is not the best thing for Johnny. Spike likes stealing cards from his opponents, it's kind of like getting card advantage in a way.
(3/3) Elegance - Not too long and certainly easy enough to understand.
Development
(3/3) Viability - No problems with color pie or rarity.
(2/3) Balance - Two things immediately took my attention: 1- "or a Bolas planeswalker": I really feel like this wants to be followed by "you control". I don't think you want this card to allow you to cast cards your opponent exiled with their own, say, Nicol Bolas, God-Pharaoh, both for balance and for flavor. 2- "mana of any color": this means you can't have it be colorless, so you wouldn't be able to cast one of the Eldrazi from OGW that require colorless mana, for example Reality Smasher. I really feel like you would want this to be "mana of any type", so that it could be colorless too. That's also the direction real Magic is taking after OGW, check for example Gonti, Lord of Luxury and Vizier of the Menagerie versus Daxos of Meletis, Psychic Intrusion and a lot of other cards printed before OGW. Oath of Nissa is in OGW but says "color" because it's restricted to planeswalker cards, and there are none actually that require colorless mana. Both colorless planeswalkers that actually exist (Karn and Ugin) only require generic mana, not specifically colorless (aka the difference between 1 and C). As for playability, the lack of a specified duration makes this much more playable than it would be otherwise, as you don't have to cast the card right away like it happens, for example, with impulsive draw in red. I expect this to be playable in limited, but the card having to be an instant or sorcery hurts in competitive constructed. I can definitely see this card being liked in casual constructed though, and it's also very interesting in multiplayer. Exiling multiple cards a turn makes much more likely that you will hit at least one instant or sorcery to steal. It's also amazing how all cards this round play into the "steal resources from your opponent" design space. I guess that's just what Bolas does.
Creativity
(2.5/3) Uniqueness - Caring about cards exiled by other cards in addition to itself feels very original. There have been cards in the past playing in similar space though.
(3/3) Flavor - Perfect in this regard. The name is spot on (we just saw Bolas doing quite some monologue in the last HOU story...) and the flavor text is not only something Bolas would definitely say but it's also true in-story with the relationship between Bolas and the very formation of the Gatewatch.
Polish
(2/3) Quality - The Saxon genitive form keeps the "s" when the name is singular (example in Magic: Rakdos's Return), so this card should be called Bolas's Monologue (-0.5 for mild grammar mistake). Two very minor mistakes that together make -0.5: the only time "then" if followed by a comma in black border is when there is an "if" or "for" clause right afterwards (I searched Gatherer for all instances of "Then, " with the comma in Oracle text and there are only four results: Jalum Grifter doesn't count because it's silver-bordered, the other three are Calming Verse, Raging River and Rhystic Study) and there should be no space between the long dash and the flavor text attribution (there are plenty of examples in modern-era Magic sets, HOU too of course, let's say Puncturing Blow just to mention one).
(2/2) Main Challenge - Good.
(2/2) Subchallenges - Both met.
Total: 22/25
willows: 22
The_Hittite: 20.5
admirableadmiral: 19.5
Jimmy Groove: 14
MCC - Winner (6): Oct 2014, Apr Nov 2017, Jan 2018, Apr Jun 2019 || Host (15): Dec 2014, Apr Jul Aug Dec 2015, Mar Jul Aug Oct 2016, Feb Jul 2017, Jun Nov 2018, Feb Jul 2019 (last one here) || Judge (34): every month from Nov 2014 to Nov 2016 except Oct 2015, every month from Feb to Jul 2017 except Apr 2017, then Oct 2017, May Jun Nov 2018, Feb Jul 2019 (last one here)
CCL - Winner (3): Jul 2016 (tied with Flatline), May 2017, Jul 2019 (last one here) || Host (5): Feb 2015, Mar Apr May Jun 2016
DCC - Winner (1): Mar 2015 (tied with Piar) || Host (3): May Oct 2015, Jan 2016
• The two public custom sets I've been part a part of the design team for:
"Brotherhood of Ormos" - Blog post with all info - set thread - design skeleton / card list || "Extinctia: Homo Evanuit" - Blog post with all info - set thread - card list spreadsheet
• "The Lion's Lair", my article series about MTG and custom card design in particular. Latest article here. Here is the article index. Rather outdated by now, and based on the old MCC rubric, but I'm leaving this here for anybody that might be interested anyway.
• My only public attempt at being a writer: the story of my Leonin custom planeswalker Jeff Lionheart. (I have a very big one that I'm working on right now but that's private for now, and I don't know if I will ever actually publish it, and I also have ideas for multiple future ones, including one where I'm going to reprise Jeff.)
(2/3) Appeal: Timmy loves this card very much; controlling an entire multiplayer table for a whole round of turns is the sort of unforgettable experience that can last for years to come.
This is an effectively expressive card for Johnny. However, the self-exile resolution text prevents this card from ever realizing its full combo potential.
This card is simply far too expensive for Spike.
(2/3) Elegance: Mindslaver effects are inelegant by their very nature. Around a multiplayer table, multiple mindslaver effects are each, by their very nature, very inelegant.
Development -
(2.5/3) Viability: Mindslaver effects have definitively deemed to be Black (see Worst Fears), and I see no problem with the colors chosen for the mana cost of the Overload version. The chosen rarity of Mythic Rare for this card is absolutely perfect.
However, my fellow judge, Rocco, brings up a poignant viability concern. Where in the Multiverse could this card ever see actual print? Surely not a Standard-legal set. Commander is also likely not an option either due to this card not having the potential to exist as a commander despite existing as a Mythic Rare. Perhaps something akin to Conspiracy?
(1.5/3) Balance: As previously discussed, my fellow judges have deemed this card to be a worse Worst Fears. However, let us be honest, this card is not interested in Standard; this card is interested in multiplayer. Therefore, one should judge this card with multiplayer in mind, rather than the usual Standard and Modern.
In all honesty (and as a Spike myself this realization has terrified me), the overload cost on this card should either be eleven or twelve mana total. This is mainly because the option to target a single opponent around the table exists regardless and can still be game-winning all on its own.
Furthermore, since the majority of multiplayer formats are more casual and focused on the fun, I inevitably have to bring up just how unfun this effect is to play against. It is even worse that everyone else other than the caster may have to play against this effect. The cruelty of such effects was an important contributing factor as to why Emrakul, the Promised End was eventually banned from Standard.
Creativity -
(1.5/3) Uniqueness: Worst Fears meets Bolas.
(3/3) Flavor: Ever since my previous blunder this month, I have recently taken the time to read the entirety of the Amonkhet story and the Hour of Devastation story for the purposes of properly judging the rest of this month's contest that followed. Without doing so, I could not have given this card the perfect score for this criterion that I also believe that it rightfully deserves. My fellow judges have explained why this card deserves such better than I could. Otherwise, I shall refrain from spoilers.
Polish -
(2/3) Quality: Singular possessives ending in S sometimes receive another S after the apostrophe, but this can also be grammatically omitted (which I actually often do myself in my own writing).
In the first sentence of the rules text, "his or her" should surely be 'that player's' instead (minus half a point).
My fellow judge, Rocco, brought up an excellent point regarding the possibility of reminder text on this card. To elaborate, both Worst Fears and Mindslaver have reminder text, while Emrakul, the Promised End does not have reminder text for this effect. Mythic Rare cards can technically eschew reminder text at all times, but it seems far too weird to me that the reminder text for overload has been included here while the reminder text for the much more complicated effect of the two has not been included under these specific circumstances (minus half a point).
(2/2) Main Challenge: Main challenge met!
(2/2) Subchallenges: Both subchallenges met!
Total: 18.5/25
Final thoughts: While my fellow judges have disagreed as to whether or not this properly serves as a signature spell for Bolas, I am inclined to believe that it does meet the main challenge enough to merit both points for the criterion.
(3/3) Appeal: Both Spike and Johnny love the toolbox of this card's rules text so much that Timmy's somewhat lukewarm opinion by comparison is honestly rather irrelevant.
(0/3) Elegance: While I personally like the difference between control and ownership being highlighted by this card (which also feels very Bolas), it does constitute an inelegance for many players.
This card's fourth line of rules text is heavy enough on the rules as to constitute a major inelegance, infamy aside.
Finally, this card seems as though it were stapled or mixed together out of other cards rather than mechanically connected or elegantly woven. Attributing as powerful of a flavor as Bolas's to a card can still only do so much to provide context.
Development -
(0.5/3) Viability: This card is definitely Blue, and the activated ability of this card is definitely Black and Red (and not Black or Red). However, this card surely should have been a Mythic Rare.
Furthermore, the total text of this card fills nine lines in all, which is not ideal and constitutes a minor viability concern. The flavor text would likely have to be cut down the line.
I also sincerely doubt that any card with the infamous rules text of Panglacial Wurm shall ever see official print ever again (and I do not mean the trample).
(0/3) Balance: Firstly, this card is a strictly better Mind Control with three upsides. Hence, I believe that this card has three upsides too many. Furthermore, the card itself is not just undercosted, but the activated ability is also undercosted. Admittedly, the fourth line of rules is often little more than mere trinket text, due to the two very specific conditions.
Truthfully, the nail-driving reminder that hit me personally relating to this card's balance, or lack thereof, was how truly miserable this card would be to play against, especially among casual players. Perhaps not quite on the levels of Worst Fears miserable, but miserable enough to play against that it would undermine the point of Magic, which is to be a fun game first and foremost.
Creativity -
(2.5/3) Uniqueness: There likely will only ever be one Panglacial Wurm, but I admit that this card is almost there in terms of uniqueness. Almost.
(1.5/3) Flavor: The card name is absolutely fantastic. The flavor text is completely unnecessary in all honesty, and it seems very forced as well.
Polish -
(0/3) Quality
(2/2) Main Challenge: Main challenge met!
(2/2) Subchallenges: Both subchallenges met!
Total: 11.5/25
Final thought: If you are interested in my reasonings for the quality score pertaining to this card, please feel free to send me a PM.
(1/3) Appeal: Timmy ends up disliking this card as it does nothing initially and only becomes exciting later but only for a single turn. Delayed gratifications that are temporary are not Timmy's favorites.
Johnny can definitely build a deck around this card.
Spike does not like the weighted mana cost nor the inherent predictability of this card.
(1.5/3) Elegance: Two delayed sacrifice effects put together lead to two minor inelegances. Two effects that affect the board state that both trigger 'at the beginning of the next end step', with the first being optional and the second being mandatory, lead to another minor quibble for me (although this may just be a personal pet peeve rather than anything of importance).
Development -
(2.5/3) Viability: This card checks a lot of boxes for Red. The rarity of Rare also seems correct.
However, this card possesses nine lines worth of rules text, which constitutes a minor viability concern.
(2/3) Balance: This card is not noteworthy regarding Limited, which Rares are allowed to be, so I shall focus this balance score primarily regarding Constructed.
The theoretical deck that would be constructed around this card actually seems fairly alright. Definitely not anything meta-defining, but for the time being supportable at the very least.
However, it should be noted that effects that change control are awfully unfun to play against, and this card is entirely based around an even harsher variant of that effect as well.
Creativity -
(3/3) Uniqueness: Simply put, 'Whenever you gain control of a permanent from another player' has never been used as a trigger for an ability before. Congratulations.
(2/3) Flavor: This card's name is quite serviceable. No room for flavor text.
The mechanical flavor presented here may well have fared better if this card did not sacrifice itself as part of its second ability (in fact, that actually does not seem like Bolas' style at all, to be perfectly honest).
Polish -
(3/3) Quality: Perfect!
(2/2) Main Challenge: Main challenge met!
(2/2) Subchallenges: Both subchallenges met!
Total: 19/25
Final thoughts: My one final thought on this card is that the mana cost is awfully weird. Truth be told, this is one of those weird cards where the cost of the activated ability matters a lot more than the actual mana cost.
(1.5/3) Appeal: Timmy kind of likes this card as it can definitely create those memorable moments against one's opponent(s), but it can also end up disappointingly doing nothing.
Johnny somewhat likes this card as he would prefer to use his own deck to express himself, if possible, rather than an adversary's.
Spike is appealed to by this interesting sort of draw engine, yet it is also quite match-up dependent.
(3/3) Elegance: Perhaps Bolas' own monologues lack elegance (can we get to the bloody point already?), but this card of yours most certainly does not.
Development -
(2/3) Viability: This is an acceptable bend in Blue for various good reasons. I believe that a rarity of Rare for this card is also be correct.
However, this card is not without viability concerns. Firstly, as my fellow judges have also designated, this card's rules text should include the following pair of words 'you control' after the words "or a Bolas planeswalker". Otherwise, players might have to start tracking cards that were also never officially intended to be tracked, which becomes especially nightmarish should the corner cases involved ever come to pass. I also doubt that this change would meaningfully impact the power level of this card.
Secondly, as bravelion83 invaluably mentioned, this card's rules text should use the word 'type' in place of the word "color", since colorless mana is not a color of mana but is instead a type of mana. Perhaps a couple of examples might aid in explaining this particular concern. While there are no sorceries that use C in their mana cost, there are two instants that do (which also validates this viability concern significantly): Spatial Contortion and Warping Wail. With the word "color" instead of 'type', if you do not control a land (or other source of mana) that produces C, you could not cast either of these spells, despite how they would otherwise have been (for the sake of this thought experiment) exiled by this card (or a Bolas planeswalker) satisfactorily.
Both of the above viability concerns are minor ones. Admittedly, there is technically nothing wrong qualitatively with either of these quibbles.
(2.5/3) Balance: I suppose that this card is potentially playable in Limited, although I would be loathe to draft it (which speaks more about my specific Limited style of play than this specific card).
However, where this card truly shines is in Constructed, especially multiplayer. However, this card lacks the consistency to make much of anything competitive (especially when compared to Nicol Bolas, God-Pharaoh himself), but it does seem like quite a lot of casual fun...for yourself, anyway. Having an opponent's spells turned against them is not quite as unhealthful as taking control of an opponent's permanents, but it is somewhat unhealthful nonetheless. After much thought, that might be the only relevant balance problem that I have with this card in particular.
Creativity -
(2.5/3) Uniqueness: I honestly am not sure about this score; I only know that similar cards have been printed in the past but not that many. This feels original without being revolutionary.
(2.5/3) Flavor: The card name is functional; the flavor text is suitable (plus the emphasis is definitely welcome for livening it up). It is just that these mechanics are not quite the perfect fit for this rather specific flavor. Truthfully, the parts are all there for a perfect score, it is just that I would recommend some more fine-tuning here and there before then.
Polish -
(2/3) Quality: Singular possessives ending in S sometimes receive another S after the apostrophe, but this can also be grammatically omitted (which I actually often do myself in my own writing).
For the second sentence within the first (and only) line of rules text, the comma after the word "then" should be nixed (minus half a point).
There should be no space between the long dash and the name "Nicol Bolas" in the flavor text (minus half a point). Thank you for utilizing the correct long dash!
(2/2) Main Challenge: Main challenge met!
(2/2) Subchallenges: Both subchallenges met!
Total: 20/25
Final thoughts: As bad of a mechanic as fateseal is, it does synergize quite nicely with this one card in particular.
Also, bloody hells, this particular card of yours was quite the absolute pain for me to judge accurately, especially while fatigued from being under the weather. Nevertheless, no lasting harm has been done, thankfully!
admirableadmiral — 19
The_Hittite — 18.5
Jimmy Groove — 11.5
willows
Congratulations to willows and many thanks to all those who played and judged this month! If everything goes as planned, we'll meet again on Ixalan.
willows: 22 + 21 + 19 + 20 = 82
The_Hittite: 20.5 + 22 + 18.5 + 18.5 = 79.5
admirableadmiral: 19.5 + 21.5 + 17.5 + 19 = 77.5
Jimmy Groove: 14 + 17 + 12.5 + 11.5 = 55
MCC - Winner (6): Oct 2014, Apr Nov 2017, Jan 2018, Apr Jun 2019 || Host (15): Dec 2014, Apr Jul Aug Dec 2015, Mar Jul Aug Oct 2016, Feb Jul 2017, Jun Nov 2018, Feb Jul 2019 (last one here) || Judge (34): every month from Nov 2014 to Nov 2016 except Oct 2015, every month from Feb to Jul 2017 except Apr 2017, then Oct 2017, May Jun Nov 2018, Feb Jul 2019 (last one here)
CCL - Winner (3): Jul 2016 (tied with Flatline), May 2017, Jul 2019 (last one here) || Host (5): Feb 2015, Mar Apr May Jun 2016
DCC - Winner (1): Mar 2015 (tied with Piar) || Host (3): May Oct 2015, Jan 2016
• The two public custom sets I've been part a part of the design team for:
"Brotherhood of Ormos" - Blog post with all info - set thread - design skeleton / card list || "Extinctia: Homo Evanuit" - Blog post with all info - set thread - card list spreadsheet
• "The Lion's Lair", my article series about MTG and custom card design in particular. Latest article here. Here is the article index. Rather outdated by now, and based on the old MCC rubric, but I'm leaving this here for anybody that might be interested anyway.
• My only public attempt at being a writer: the story of my Leonin custom planeswalker Jeff Lionheart. (I have a very big one that I'm working on right now but that's private for now, and I don't know if I will ever actually publish it, and I also have ideas for multiple future ones, including one where I'm going to reprise Jeff.)