"Yeah...are you okay? You're really flushed." Whitney lifted Shirin's head up, but she was smart enough to avert her gaze.
"Hmm...I think I can help you. Just relax, don't do anything sudden." Whitney holds Shirin's hands in hers and closes her eyes.
Whitney's hands were so soft, almost like silk. Shirin was looking at the other mage in a way she hadn't looked at anyone else before...the girl was an angel in every sense of the word. A strange magic was flowing into her mind, exacerbating her emotions and turning her brain inside out. It was too much, all the sensations thrashing at her consciousness, waiting for this moment of weakness to break free...
And then, silence. Her mind was totally quiet, the only thoughts running through her were mundane things, her class schedule, her lunch plans, things like that. Whatever Whitney had done had eliminated the crushing weight of confusion and misplaced passion she had been afflitced with. However, whatever happened came at a cost, she was blushing furiously.
"I...you really think I'm that cute?"
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With that question, Shirin's mind turned a little less quiet, as she thought of what to say. "I don't... I'm not sure what I'm... feeling, okay?" she said defensively. She felt compelled not to lie though, and she followed with a hesitant "But... I guess?"
"I...I see..." Whitney seems unsure of what to make of the situation as well; and the silence from both of you speaks volumes.
"We...probably shouldn't get to close to each other until our study session at the library. I don't want another...meltdown..." The girl's face is horribly flushed, Whitney seems to have found something really shocking. Before Shirin can say anything, Whitney turns and leaves.
Checking her watch, Shirin sees that it might be time for her to leave as well.
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Shirin was left behind confused by Whitney, at least, for a moment. Then her brain switched back to normal and she realizes she should be off to Chemistry. Still, somewhere in her mind, as her legs moved her body onward, a tiny voice questioned what the hell just went wrong in her life...
As Shirin walked, her mind was still going on, wondering what she had done. (and what Whitney had done -- what would have happened had she not intervened?) And despite her best efforts, she couldn't think of anything. No understaqnding as to why Whitney had freaked out, or why she felt so alone.
South Boston Municipal High School, Boston, MA
Wednesday, October 10, 2012; 2:38 PM Eastern Daylight Time
Classes were almost over, and Shirin was just sitting, waiting for the final bell to ring. Ever since this morning, she'd been distracted and it showed. She barely touched her lunch, her normally unflappable concentration was always being interupted, the girl even had a hard time acknowledging the growing number of people who seemed to take interest in her.
"You know, it's troubling to see you this depressed...it doesn't reflect well on your abilities. Please, at least spell out what is bothering you, it should help a little..." The voice in Shirin's head awakened again, the soft feminine voice carrying a kind of motherly tone to it. It certainly couldn't hurt, seeing as she wasn't gonna get anything more done today...
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Feeling uneasy, but somehow comforted by the sound of voice, Shirin decided to respond honestly "It's Whitney... I think she used magic to read my subconscious, and she found something, well, I guess disturbing is the good word." She played with her pencil while she listened with one ear to the teacher's words. History was about the Cold War today, and though she usually found the classes very interesting, today she just couldn't focus. Not that she had to worry, the teacher just rambled on while most of the class chatted or dreamed away.
"Well she definitely used magic, but...I doubt it could have been anything too disturbing. Maybe it's something she just didn't expect.
What do you think of her?"
The voice seems to be trying to get you to dig deep within yourself, to see if you can figure out the answer on your own. Of course that doesn't stop the teacher from taking a rare moment to pose a question.
"Now Shirin, after the Bay of Pigs incident in Cuba, what other factors led to the cuban missile crisis and why did the Soviet union not attack outright?" It wasn't a hard question if she thought it through...
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"Um..." Shirin only responded, as always, she was unable to say anything for the first moments after the question. Quickly though, she recovered, and answered the question before the teacher would get suspicious "Well... the installation of tactical missiles on Cuba by the Soviets, which was seen as a move of aggression by us. And the USSR didn't attack because they were afraid of mutual assured destruction."
Shirin falls back into her usual daze-like state, her mind thinking about other matters. Not the least of which is her fateful meeting with Whitney...
what was she planning?
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To be honest to herself, Shirin had no idea how she was going to fix this whole problem that somehow had come to be. As she drifted further away from the classroom she suddenly remember that the voice had posed a question just before she got distracted. "What was it you asked me again?"
"That other girl, Whitney I think you said her name was...she's obviously a mage, but you don't have to be a mind-reader to know there's something going on between the two of you. The real question is what that something is; neither of you seem to know that yet."
Shirin ponders the exacts of what is going on between the two of them, going over what she knows. She knows Whitney can use magic. She knows the girl is attractive (at least to her). She knows that Whitney knows Shirin finds her attractive.
But what does that all add up to?
"But you asked me to repeat the question, so I will: What do you think of her?"
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"Well, I think I like her... really like her..." Shirin thinks, and lets out a mental sigh "She's... so beautiful, I guess that's what I should call it..."
"I see...well, she probably wouldn't see that coming, and it certainly explains a lot." While the voice in your head seems to understand the situation, Shirin is still clueless.
"If that's truly how you feel about her...then your magic will make those thoughts clear. Just...if I were you, I'd be careful about how much you give her. Magic can explode easily when paired with an intense emotion."
Well, the voice doesn't seem to want to give her any more than that. but it does allow a bit of reflection. Did she truly love Whitney?
She thought so. but at the moment, she couldn't say for sure...
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"I... I will try to keep that in mind..." Shirin responded as awkwardly as she was feeling. She just wanted to be done with school and get her mind at least fixed a little bit.
It toko longer than Shirin would have wanted but eventually the final bell rang, giving the girl a much needed break.
Farrokh Residence, Boston, MA Wednesday, October 10, 2012; 3:27 PM Eastern Daylight Time
Shirin has finished what little homework she had, but now she's just trying to rest before her meeting with Whitney. There's something that's bugging her, but she can't pinpoint exactly what.
If there was ever a time for a little magical introspection, this would be it.
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Shirin found it odd, disturbing even, that there was again that uneasy feeling in her mind. To add to that, the emotions were still creating conflict in her mind. She tapped out her last resources, the last drops of energy still left, to explain to herself what was actually going on. She probed her own mind with her magic.
(OOC: she hasn't cast a single spell today, so while something like this would be taxing on her magic, it wouldn't tap her out.)
Shirin sat in her bed, focusing her thoughts inwards. She needed to put everything into perspective, make sense of everything. Even if it defied everything that seemed logical and rational, she needed to talk with herself.
"Hey...you there? come on, wake up..."
As shirin opens her eyes, she sees a strange site in front of her as the sun shines in her face. Looking around, she recognizes this place. Her parents have been here before, and she had intended to make a trip here once she was older.
This was the Atash Behram in Yzad - the holiest Zoroastrian temple outside of India. There's a reflecting pool just outside the building (OOC: no, not that kind) and inside behind her is a pyre, the sacred flame as alight as ever. And standing in front of her was...well, it could be her twin. The other girl was wearing a much more traditional Iranian robe, almost as if she worked at this place; but everything else about her was a spitting image to the inexperienced water mage.
"Well, you're awake, I guess that's good. You obviously have plenty of questions, but I'll try to knock out the obvious ones." It's certainly like something she would say, as the girl continues her explanation.
"This is because of that last spell you cast, you're effectively inside your own mind. Everything about here is because you wanted it, and if you wanna change it, feel free. But for now I guess this is as good a place as any. As far as the real world is concerned, you're just sleeping so you can relax a little. I won't keep you from your meeting." Shirin blushes a little as she remembers what all that will entail. Her twin proceeds.
"Well...fire and water signify purity - purity of mind, of spirit. You seem like you want that same kind of purity and clarity in everything: to be able to have everything clean and simple, not having to read through all sorts of euphemisms and innuendo. am I right?"
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ooc: I didn't mean taxing on her magical reserves, but more on her mental condition.
"Um..." Shirin pondered on what to say as she took further notice of the strange phenomena taking place "I guess so, I want to know what's going on with my life... why I feel so strange inside, and not just about the concept of magic..."
Shirin's twin sat next to the mage and put a hand on her shoulder, almost as if she knew what Shirin was going through.
If she thought about it, the robed girl kinda did.
"Well, you probably already know this, but change is tough for Aspies. You like things to stay the same, to just continue going the path you'ver always taken. Might explain why you have an affinity for the water - no matter what you do with it, it's still gonna end up as water when it's all said and done." While you'd never thought of it that way, it makes as much sense as anything else you could come up with.
"All of high school things have been changing. Cliques form, friendships are made and broken faster than you can say "rebound", and everything you thought you knew about people is turned upside down and inside out. There's no such thing as 'status quo' anymore, and that bugs you. And then the magic..." The doppleganger didn't need to continue, but she did.
"Magic is just plain weird. you've always dreamed about the possibilities, what it would be like - but the logistics of it? There's no way you could tell me you'd considered how you'd live if it actually happened. You're scared of what this will bring, scared of what it'll do to you, just scared of the change. I get it - you have to remember that we're the same person. I understand what you're going through, because I'm going through it too."
That seemed to calm Shirin down, but only just.
"The bottom line is that you're changing. Physically, mentally, spiritually...and it's impossible to wind back the clock. So you can embrace the new you, or you can live in fear of 'what if' and 'why me' for the rest of your life. Do you remember that little phrase from the AA flier?" Seeing that Shirin has no recollection of such a trivial event, the girl continues. "Oh right...you probably forgot it the next day. Your mind never actually forgets anything, it just gets buried deep in your subconscious, where I can dig it up.
You were at the library, and you saw a quote on a flier to an AA meeting...do you remember it now?"
Shirin is still unable to remember what exactly happened, even if she can recreate it in her mind's eye. Of course that's not the only thing that's going on in her head at the moment.
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"Um..." Shirin sought and stumbled across various thoughts and memories. She was sure she wouldn't just forget such a trivial thing, because those were often the things she could actually remember, even after months. She tried to imagine the library, but she automatically connected that to Whitney... she damned herself for trailing off like that. It was just her wish to remember the one little detail, not everything that happened today, nor imagine what was yet to come...
"Grant me the peace to accept what I cannot change; Grant me the courage to change what I can, Grant me the wisdom to know the difference."
Of course, now that she hears the words the memory falls into place, but it doesn't do much to help her mood.
"Hey, cheer up...oh." Shirin's doppleganger sees what the original is thinking and draws the same conclusions. "Worried about this meeting, aren't you?" She doesn't need a reply as she sits down. "Look, there's nothing wrong with liking someone, especially someone smart and cute like her. All you have to do is make sure she understands you and what you're like...or is something else bothering you?"
While the robed iranian girl knew what Shirin was thinking, she wanted the water mage to actually say it. Perhaps that would help her understand what she was really thinking, under the surface.
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"I just fear in telling her of my... affection... she'll turn away from me, that she'll draw draw the wrong conclusions." Shirin told the other her "I don't even know how she's really like... she acts so mysterious..."
"Well...I have a theory about her. Take it with a grain of salt but I, that is to say, you, might be able to relate." Sitting next to her twin, the dream Shirin tried to explain.
"She's new to this place. Obviously she has considerable skill when it comes to casting, but she doesn't sem to be that great in figuring out social situations -- completely oblivious to what she did to you, and her use of charm magic shows that she wants to be someone, but isn't sure how to go about it. I'm sure you know how that goes." With a light chuckle, the girl continued.
"Regardless, she said that mental magic is something of a specialty of the element. While you may not be able to read her mind, if you can read her emotions, her body language...if you can gauge how her heart feels, you should be able to get through to her. Just trust your instincts and make sure that you care."
That was it? act like someone who gives a damn and she'd open up? It almost sounds too easy, Shirin figures.
"She's lost. In a strange town, doesn't know a single soul, much less someone that she can talk with - her magic is probably somethign that she's kept bottled up for who knows how long. What she wants...what she needs is a friend. You do that for her and there's no telling what she'd do for you."
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"Well, I guess it won't hurt to try..." Shirin said with a slim smile, she finally felt a bit reassured, that everything might just as well go right now and not wrong. But in her head, turmoil still ruled, as she now started to plan ahead as usual, which had its up and downsides...
As Shirin was left alone to her machinations, the scene around her changed to suit the scenario playing out in her head. What was a Zoroastrain temple was now the local library, Shirin's twin now dressed in clothes that could have come from her closet, people reading and studying quietly.
"You know...intuition tells me that the most important thing will be the power of your conviction. If you're on the fence about doing something or saying something, *don't do it*. Making a move on her is gonna require you commit to it, and if you don't want it with all of your heart and soul...well that might be the easiest way to lose her."
While it was easier said than done, Shirin felts fairly confident in her ability to not hold anything back around Whitney. The only question was...how?
Unfortunately for her, Shirin was the only one who could answer that.
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"Hmm...I think I can help you. Just relax, don't do anything sudden." Whitney holds Shirin's hands in hers and closes her eyes.
Whitney's hands were so soft, almost like silk. Shirin was looking at the other mage in a way she hadn't looked at anyone else before...the girl was an angel in every sense of the word. A strange magic was flowing into her mind, exacerbating her emotions and turning her brain inside out. It was too much, all the sensations thrashing at her consciousness, waiting for this moment of weakness to break free...
And then, silence. Her mind was totally quiet, the only thoughts running through her were mundane things, her class schedule, her lunch plans, things like that. Whatever Whitney had done had eliminated the crushing weight of confusion and misplaced passion she had been afflitced with. However, whatever happened came at a cost, she was blushing furiously.
"I...you really think I'm that cute?"
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"We...probably shouldn't get to close to each other until our study session at the library. I don't want another...meltdown..." The girl's face is horribly flushed, Whitney seems to have found something really shocking. Before Shirin can say anything, Whitney turns and leaves.
Checking her watch, Shirin sees that it might be time for her to leave as well.
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South Boston Municipal High School, Boston, MA
Wednesday, October 10, 2012; 2:38 PM Eastern Daylight Time
Classes were almost over, and Shirin was just sitting, waiting for the final bell to ring. Ever since this morning, she'd been distracted and it showed. She barely touched her lunch, her normally unflappable concentration was always being interupted, the girl even had a hard time acknowledging the growing number of people who seemed to take interest in her.
"You know, it's troubling to see you this depressed...it doesn't reflect well on your abilities. Please, at least spell out what is bothering you, it should help a little..." The voice in Shirin's head awakened again, the soft feminine voice carrying a kind of motherly tone to it. It certainly couldn't hurt, seeing as she wasn't gonna get anything more done today...
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What do you think of her?"
The voice seems to be trying to get you to dig deep within yourself, to see if you can figure out the answer on your own. Of course that doesn't stop the teacher from taking a rare moment to pose a question.
"Now Shirin, after the Bay of Pigs incident in Cuba, what other factors led to the cuban missile crisis and why did the Soviet union not attack outright?" It wasn't a hard question if she thought it through...
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Shirin falls back into her usual daze-like state, her mind thinking about other matters. Not the least of which is her fateful meeting with Whitney...
what was she planning?
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Shirin ponders the exacts of what is going on between the two of them, going over what she knows. She knows Whitney can use magic. She knows the girl is attractive (at least to her). She knows that Whitney knows Shirin finds her attractive.
But what does that all add up to?
"But you asked me to repeat the question, so I will: What do you think of her?"
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"If that's truly how you feel about her...then your magic will make those thoughts clear. Just...if I were you, I'd be careful about how much you give her. Magic can explode easily when paired with an intense emotion."
Well, the voice doesn't seem to want to give her any more than that. but it does allow a bit of reflection. Did she truly love Whitney?
She thought so. but at the moment, she couldn't say for sure...
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Farrokh Residence, Boston, MA
Wednesday, October 10, 2012; 3:27 PM Eastern Daylight Time
Shirin has finished what little homework she had, but now she's just trying to rest before her meeting with Whitney. There's something that's bugging her, but she can't pinpoint exactly what.
If there was ever a time for a little magical introspection, this would be it.
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Shirin sat in her bed, focusing her thoughts inwards. She needed to put everything into perspective, make sense of everything. Even if it defied everything that seemed logical and rational, she needed to talk with herself.
"Hey...you there? come on, wake up..."
As shirin opens her eyes, she sees a strange site in front of her as the sun shines in her face. Looking around, she recognizes this place. Her parents have been here before, and she had intended to make a trip here once she was older.
This was the Atash Behram in Yzad - the holiest Zoroastrian temple outside of India. There's a reflecting pool just outside the building (OOC: no, not that kind) and inside behind her is a pyre, the sacred flame as alight as ever. And standing in front of her was...well, it could be her twin. The other girl was wearing a much more traditional Iranian robe, almost as if she worked at this place; but everything else about her was a spitting image to the inexperienced water mage.
"Well, you're awake, I guess that's good. You obviously have plenty of questions, but I'll try to knock out the obvious ones." It's certainly like something she would say, as the girl continues her explanation.
"This is because of that last spell you cast, you're effectively inside your own mind. Everything about here is because you wanted it, and if you wanna change it, feel free. But for now I guess this is as good a place as any. As far as the real world is concerned, you're just sleeping so you can relax a little. I won't keep you from your meeting." Shirin blushes a little as she remembers what all that will entail. Her twin proceeds.
"Well...fire and water signify purity - purity of mind, of spirit. You seem like you want that same kind of purity and clarity in everything: to be able to have everything clean and simple, not having to read through all sorts of euphemisms and innuendo. am I right?"
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"Um..." Shirin pondered on what to say as she took further notice of the strange phenomena taking place "I guess so, I want to know what's going on with my life... why I feel so strange inside, and not just about the concept of magic..."
Shirin's twin sat next to the mage and put a hand on her shoulder, almost as if she knew what Shirin was going through.
If she thought about it, the robed girl kinda did.
"Well, you probably already know this, but change is tough for Aspies. You like things to stay the same, to just continue going the path you'ver always taken. Might explain why you have an affinity for the water - no matter what you do with it, it's still gonna end up as water when it's all said and done." While you'd never thought of it that way, it makes as much sense as anything else you could come up with.
"All of high school things have been changing. Cliques form, friendships are made and broken faster than you can say "rebound", and everything you thought you knew about people is turned upside down and inside out. There's no such thing as 'status quo' anymore, and that bugs you. And then the magic..." The doppleganger didn't need to continue, but she did.
"Magic is just plain weird. you've always dreamed about the possibilities, what it would be like - but the logistics of it? There's no way you could tell me you'd considered how you'd live if it actually happened. You're scared of what this will bring, scared of what it'll do to you, just scared of the change. I get it - you have to remember that we're the same person. I understand what you're going through, because I'm going through it too."
That seemed to calm Shirin down, but only just.
"The bottom line is that you're changing. Physically, mentally, spiritually...and it's impossible to wind back the clock. So you can embrace the new you, or you can live in fear of 'what if' and 'why me' for the rest of your life. Do you remember that little phrase from the AA flier?" Seeing that Shirin has no recollection of such a trivial event, the girl continues. "Oh right...you probably forgot it the next day. Your mind never actually forgets anything, it just gets buried deep in your subconscious, where I can dig it up.
You were at the library, and you saw a quote on a flier to an AA meeting...do you remember it now?"
Shirin is still unable to remember what exactly happened, even if she can recreate it in her mind's eye. Of course that's not the only thing that's going on in her head at the moment.
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Of course, now that she hears the words the memory falls into place, but it doesn't do much to help her mood.
"Hey, cheer up...oh." Shirin's doppleganger sees what the original is thinking and draws the same conclusions. "Worried about this meeting, aren't you?" She doesn't need a reply as she sits down. "Look, there's nothing wrong with liking someone, especially someone smart and cute like her. All you have to do is make sure she understands you and what you're like...or is something else bothering you?"
While the robed iranian girl knew what Shirin was thinking, she wanted the water mage to actually say it. Perhaps that would help her understand what she was really thinking, under the surface.
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"She's new to this place. Obviously she has considerable skill when it comes to casting, but she doesn't sem to be that great in figuring out social situations -- completely oblivious to what she did to you, and her use of charm magic shows that she wants to be someone, but isn't sure how to go about it. I'm sure you know how that goes." With a light chuckle, the girl continued.
"Regardless, she said that mental magic is something of a specialty of the element. While you may not be able to read her mind, if you can read her emotions, her body language...if you can gauge how her heart feels, you should be able to get through to her. Just trust your instincts and make sure that you care."
That was it? act like someone who gives a damn and she'd open up? It almost sounds too easy, Shirin figures.
"She's lost. In a strange town, doesn't know a single soul, much less someone that she can talk with - her magic is probably somethign that she's kept bottled up for who knows how long. What she wants...what she needs is a friend. You do that for her and there's no telling what she'd do for you."
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"You know...intuition tells me that the most important thing will be the power of your conviction. If you're on the fence about doing something or saying something, *don't do it*. Making a move on her is gonna require you commit to it, and if you don't want it with all of your heart and soul...well that might be the easiest way to lose her."
While it was easier said than done, Shirin felts fairly confident in her ability to not hold anything back around Whitney. The only question was...how?
Unfortunately for her, Shirin was the only one who could answer that.
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