Set Name: Agrion
Mechanics: Bloodlust, Convert, Renaissance, Blessed, Legacy, Discover
Theme: Civilization has just begun to develop, with revolutionary new advances being made constantly. What were originally just tribes of hunter-gatherers have melded and joined forces to spawn the very first true civilizations.
Size: 250 cards (101 Commons, 81 Uncommons, 53 Rares, 15 Mythic rares)
Expansion code: AGR
Block structure: Large set, small set. Designed for limited play and block constructed.
This set is currently in early common design. The nations and archetypes will not change significantly from this point on, and the keyword mechanics are likely to stay unless there is some major issue with them. The first pass of the white commons is done; the rest of the commons should be coming soon. I strongly dislike "draft chaff," and I'll be taking some creative liberty, so don't expect to see much of it; for every card, there should be someone who is happy it exists.
Agrion supports, in general, the standard 10-pair system, as well as some build-arounds and fringe strategies.
GU and WU: enchantments
WB and UB: graveyard recursion
UR and BR: burst
BG and RG: ramp
RW and GW: tokens
Meronuto is the WuB empire. Their theme is religion. Mechanically, they like interacting with the graveyard.
Qalera is the UbR kingdom. Their theme is revolution. Mechanically, they like doing a lot in a turn.
Nixe is the BrG clan. Their theme is savagery. Mechanically, they like destroying things.
Luho is the RgW band. Their theme is expansion. Mechanically, they like having a lot of permanents, including tokens.
Masati is the GwU republic. Their theme is growth. Mechanically, they like enchantments, including auras (think bogles) and world enchantments.
Nixe
Whenever a creature with Bloodlust kills a creature, put a +1/+1 counter on it. I'm not sure how to flavor it to include artifacts and enchantments, because I'd like to include those in the effect too.
Meronuto
I tried with Convert, but there are too many NWO problems to gaining control of creatures at lower rarities, so I went for a resurrection-themed mechanic in Undying. I'd prefer Persist, but this is a +1/+1 counter set.
Qalera
The condition of Renaissance is met as long as you have cast 2 or more spells this turn.
Masati
The condition of Blessed is met as long as the creature with Blessed is enchanted.
Luho
Whenever you a creature enters the battlefield under your control, a creature you control with Unity gets +1/+1 until end of turn (like the opposite of Prowess). This mechanic needs a better name.
All
Some permanents will have a Discover cost. You may exile the card face-up from your hand and pay its Discover cost any time you could cast a sorcery. Cards with Discover will have a special effect if you "discover" them. At the beginning of your next upkeep, the permanent is put onto the battlefield.
Made my statement on filler cards clearer; added some notes and fixed some rules for the keywords (which was changed to "Keywords" from "Keyword Mechanics") [4/22/15]
Changed most of the keywords; added a little bit more explanation to the nations; thanks for all the feedback you guys, it's really helped to guide me [4/23/15]
Added some information at the top; changed the Nixe mechanic [4/26/15]
Altered Convert; changed the nations' color identities [4/27/15]
Changed the Luho and Meronuto mechanics [4/29/15]
Added white commons first pass, changed formatting [5/6/15]
Green really isn't the "technologies" color. I think that type of theme fits better in WUB, where as GR get most artifact destruction while U gets most artifact searching and manipulation (WB being blue's allies could mingle with the tech ideal.
How are you working graveyard recursion for WUB? Will it be creatures for WB and instants/sorceries for UB?
I think Prosperity should only count nonlands... and maybe one or two less (...six nonland permanents...) SIDENOTE: The number reference in this keyword's reminder would be a written word and not a numeral. It's always written as words when counting something...life, mana costs, and p/t are generally the only numeral values.
Convert seems a little forced and odd to me...couldn't the flavor of this be kept but executed differently, perhaps without a new type of counter? +1/+1 counters could work too, making it a harder choice, do I try to convert my opponent's creature by pumping it up for a few turns? Also, Which opponent would gain control of the creature if I have more than one opponent?
Renaissance could work...
Technology should NOT be enchantments. If tech enters Magic at all, it will be on artifacts.
Legacy seems the best keyword here.
Discovery, to prevent other issues, should exile the card...which then bascally makes it Suspend 1.
I think you should look into the different types of Keywords...but here's a basic rundown...
Keywords (Flying, first strike, deathtouch, bushido, cycling, etc.) These are the keywords that generally aren't italicized on the cards and their reminder texts stays practically the same.
Keyword Abilities (Metalcraft, landfall, radiance, forecast, etc.) These are the abilities that generally italicized (at least in present design). These can have different effects. Most of your keywords above are Keyword Abilities.
Keyword Mechanics (Devotion, threshold, etc) These utilize or create an aspect of the game. Devotion counts mana symbols, threshold counts cards in graveyards. A few of your keywords are Mechanics.
Keyword Actions (Regenerate, scry, clash, etc.) These are keywords that have players take actions using specific rules. Regenerate creates a "shield", scry lets you look and "sift" your top cards. Clash flips a coin to determine outcome.
A well designed set will have one or two of each type of keyword. I think you should try diversifying your list here.
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MEMNARCH FOR PRESIDENT!!!
All cards I post are designed for custom sets...just saying
Don't hold so fast to your idea of what Magic and the Color Pie is or should be. Just because it was done in the past, but isn't done in the present doesn't mean it can't be done at all. Likewise, just because it wasn't done at all doesn't mean it can't be done.
Here's a tip: If you suggest changing a card...it's helpful to suggest HOW it should be changed.
I'd like to see a more fleshed out design goal. What are you hoping to achieve with the set? What feeling or structure is it trying to invoke?
Also you seem to be missing the fact that "draft chaff" does have a purpose. Thus fighting against your previous assertion.
Thanks for the feedback. I am currently very inexperienced in set design, but it's good that I got some replies before I got too far with some iffy ideas. (I call it exploratory design for a reason.) Overall, I think the biggest thing the set needs is a better identity for the five nations. As they are, they're too nebulous and shaky to really design anything for them. I'll try to touch on all of your points.
- You're right on technologies; I still think it's a neat idea and quite flavorful if done correctly, but it's way outside of the color pie in green (maybe on GU cards for things like agriculture). It still belongs on enchantments, though, because artifacts are tangible things-- literally, artifacts. Something like archery is not an artifact. Technologies would be more passive mechanically, too, putting them in the realm of enchantments. After considering it, though, it seems that it's better off being replaced by another keyword.
- Speaking of keywords, that's what I'll retitle the section currently called "Keyword Mechanics," which I tend to use as a blanket term for anything keyword-related. Thanks for pointing that out.
- I'll keep going with convert, but rehash its mechanical identity. Perhaps it would say that, if a creature with Convert would kill another creature in combat, instead you would gain control of it. It's probably good to have a combat-oriented keyword or two.
- I like prosperity counting lands flavorfully, because land is a major part of what actual prosperity is. If it really doesn't work out, I suppose it has to go, but for now I'll keep it, maybe just changing the number attached.
- Yeah, Renaissance is pretty interesting mechanically and makes sense in flavor. I think the Qalera would need a change before Renaissance would, since the connection is where I'm struggling and Renaissance is more solid than the Qalera, who occupy some weird space I'm still figuring out.
- Legacy has the most design space and makes sense, but I have a different issue with it: it doesn't really feel connected to the Nixe. It may work better if Legacy moved to the Luho and Prosperity replaced Technologies as the Masati's "thing," but that would require finding a new mechanic to fill the void, which I'm struggling with.
- I cannot believe I missed the rules flaw in discovery. I tried to keep it simple with the rules, but that evidently has its pitfalls. I'll reword the rules/reminder text on that one.
Archery is a skill, not a technology. Artifacts are ITEMS, tech is best represented by ITEMS. Where as, enchantments are MAGICAL effects and not tech.
Prosperity counting lands generally make green's land ramp top dog...I really think it should ignore lands...
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MEMNARCH FOR PRESIDENT!!!
All cards I post are designed for custom sets...just saying
Don't hold so fast to your idea of what Magic and the Color Pie is or should be. Just because it was done in the past, but isn't done in the present doesn't mean it can't be done at all. Likewise, just because it wasn't done at all doesn't mean it can't be done.
Here's a tip: If you suggest changing a card...it's helpful to suggest HOW it should be changed.
Archery is a skill, the BOW would be the tech. And would still be represented by artifact cards. One example isn't enough to convince me on this.
Enchantment ARE magical, there is no other way. Both cards you linked could be easily explained as a magical effect with no "tech" as you call it.
You're adamant on making this mistake, I believe.
Also, prosperity shouldn't be red at all. It should b GWU, mostly W though.
Private Mod Note
():
Rollback Post to RevisionRollBack
MEMNARCH FOR PRESIDENT!!!
All cards I post are designed for custom sets...just saying
Don't hold so fast to your idea of what Magic and the Color Pie is or should be. Just because it was done in the past, but isn't done in the present doesn't mean it can't be done at all. Likewise, just because it wasn't done at all doesn't mean it can't be done.
Here's a tip: If you suggest changing a card...it's helpful to suggest HOW it should be changed.
Legacy seems really cool legendary legacy creatures could have some large effect, inspiring all of the other soldiers. My only problem is that legacy seems like a white ability, I feel like a brave warrior would impact the creatures more than a 4/4 ape. Here's a thought, what if Legacy was an ability that any color could get. Each group seems focused on some overwhelming ideal. For example meronuto would be inspired by the legacy of a great priest. It would be like in civilization where you could get special units that are known as "greats" for example, there are great writers, great musicians, great generals, etc. You could sacrifice these units to get a special ability. EXAMPLE: WU
Vesio the Pacifist
0/2
[t] target creature cannot attack or block until, then put a convert counter on it. Use this ability only during your turn
Legacy: When Vesio the Idealist dies, gain control of all creatures with one or more convert counters on them, creatures you control may not attack, and gain the ability [t] target creature may not attack or block until your next turn, then put a convert counter on it.
Vesio basically is pacifism on a stick. When he dies, all of his followers start teaching his philosophy to all of the other creatures. Maybe there could be a cycle of 10 legendary creatures, that are not on a certain side, but try to influence the people around them. Maybe Philosophy could be an ability that has to do with teaching the lessons of a certain legendary creature.
Philosophy: Choose a legendary creature you control (the card will state what happens next, different for each card). I really like the idea that each of the groups have some sort of goal, although I do not like nixe, because their common goal is just hitting stuff. What if their thing was to revert back to the "natural way". Black wouldn't be for evil, it would be for death. Maybe they have an ability that hinders other groups.
I like your idea for Nixe, because it's fitting in terms of color and it fills the vacuum that a real theme would occupy. I didn't want them to become Gruul/Temur/Atarka, but it's a hard space to fill with anything else.
Your idea for Legacy, though, sort of defies what was meant of the mechanic; I intended it to last for either the rest of the turn or a couple of turns. Vesio really just has a leaves-the-battlefield effect, though the flavor of Legacy is there.
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Agrion [AGR]: designing commons
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Introduction
Set Name: Agrion
Mechanics: Bloodlust, Convert, Renaissance, Blessed, Legacy, Discover
Theme: Civilization has just begun to develop, with revolutionary new advances being made constantly. What were originally just tribes of hunter-gatherers have melded and joined forces to spawn the very first true civilizations.
Size: 250 cards (101 Commons, 81 Uncommons, 53 Rares, 15 Mythic rares)
Expansion code: AGR
Block structure: Large set, small set. Designed for limited play and block constructed.
This set is currently in early common design. The nations and archetypes will not change significantly from this point on, and the keyword mechanics are likely to stay unless there is some major issue with them. The first pass of the white commons is done; the rest of the commons should be coming soon. I strongly dislike "draft chaff," and I'll be taking some creative liberty, so don't expect to see much of it; for every card, there should be someone who is happy it exists.
GU and WU: enchantments
WB and UB: graveyard recursion
UR and BR: burst
BG and RG: ramp
RW and GW: tokens
Qalera is the UbR kingdom. Their theme is revolution. Mechanically, they like doing a lot in a turn.
Nixe is the BrG clan. Their theme is savagery. Mechanically, they like destroying things.
Luho is the RgW band. Their theme is expansion. Mechanically, they like having a lot of permanents, including tokens.
Masati is the GwU republic. Their theme is growth. Mechanically, they like enchantments, including auras (think bogles) and world enchantments.
Changed most of the keywords; added a little bit more explanation to the nations; thanks for all the feedback you guys, it's really helped to guide me [4/23/15]
Added some information at the top; changed the Nixe mechanic [4/26/15]
Altered Convert; changed the nations' color identities [4/27/15]
Changed the Luho and Meronuto mechanics [4/29/15]
Added white commons first pass, changed formatting [5/6/15]
How are you working graveyard recursion for WUB? Will it be creatures for WB and instants/sorceries for UB?
I think Prosperity should only count nonlands... and maybe one or two less (...six nonland permanents...) SIDENOTE: The number reference in this keyword's reminder would be a written word and not a numeral. It's always written as words when counting something...life, mana costs, and p/t are generally the only numeral values.
Convert seems a little forced and odd to me...couldn't the flavor of this be kept but executed differently, perhaps without a new type of counter? +1/+1 counters could work too, making it a harder choice, do I try to convert my opponent's creature by pumping it up for a few turns? Also, Which opponent would gain control of the creature if I have more than one opponent?
Renaissance could work...
Technology should NOT be enchantments. If tech enters Magic at all, it will be on artifacts.
Legacy seems the best keyword here.
Discovery, to prevent other issues, should exile the card...which then bascally makes it Suspend 1.
I think you should look into the different types of Keywords...but here's a basic rundown...
Keywords (Flying, first strike, deathtouch, bushido, cycling, etc.) These are the keywords that generally aren't italicized on the cards and their reminder texts stays practically the same.
Keyword Abilities (Metalcraft, landfall, radiance, forecast, etc.) These are the abilities that generally italicized (at least in present design). These can have different effects. Most of your keywords above are Keyword Abilities.
Keyword Mechanics (Devotion, threshold, etc) These utilize or create an aspect of the game. Devotion counts mana symbols, threshold counts cards in graveyards. A few of your keywords are Mechanics.
Keyword Actions (Regenerate, scry, clash, etc.) These are keywords that have players take actions using specific rules. Regenerate creates a "shield", scry lets you look and "sift" your top cards. Clash flips a coin to determine outcome.
A well designed set will have one or two of each type of keyword. I think you should try diversifying your list here.
All cards I post are designed for custom sets...just saying
Don't hold so fast to your idea of what Magic and the Color Pie is or should be. Just because it was done in the past, but isn't done in the present doesn't mean it can't be done at all. Likewise, just because it wasn't done at all doesn't mean it can't be done.
Here's a tip: If you suggest changing a card...it's helpful to suggest HOW it should be changed.
Also you seem to be missing the fact that "draft chaff" does have a purpose. Thus fighting against your previous assertion.
Are you designing commons? Check out my primer on NWO.
Interested in making a custom set? Check out my Set skeleton and archetype primer.
I also write articles about getting started with custom card creation.
Go and PLAYTEST your designs, you will learn more in a single playtests than a dozen discussions.
My custom sets:
Dreamscape
Coins of Mercalis [COMPLETE]
Exodus of Zendikar - ON HOLD
- You're right on technologies; I still think it's a neat idea and quite flavorful if done correctly, but it's way outside of the color pie in green (maybe on GU cards for things like agriculture). It still belongs on enchantments, though, because artifacts are tangible things-- literally, artifacts. Something like archery is not an artifact. Technologies would be more passive mechanically, too, putting them in the realm of enchantments. After considering it, though, it seems that it's better off being replaced by another keyword.
- Speaking of keywords, that's what I'll retitle the section currently called "Keyword Mechanics," which I tend to use as a blanket term for anything keyword-related. Thanks for pointing that out.
- I'll keep going with convert, but rehash its mechanical identity. Perhaps it would say that, if a creature with Convert would kill another creature in combat, instead you would gain control of it. It's probably good to have a combat-oriented keyword or two.
- I like prosperity counting lands flavorfully, because land is a major part of what actual prosperity is. If it really doesn't work out, I suppose it has to go, but for now I'll keep it, maybe just changing the number attached.
- Yeah, Renaissance is pretty interesting mechanically and makes sense in flavor. I think the Qalera would need a change before Renaissance would, since the connection is where I'm struggling and Renaissance is more solid than the Qalera, who occupy some weird space I'm still figuring out.
- Legacy has the most design space and makes sense, but I have a different issue with it: it doesn't really feel connected to the Nixe. It may work better if Legacy moved to the Luho and Prosperity replaced Technologies as the Masati's "thing," but that would require finding a new mechanic to fill the void, which I'm struggling with.
- I cannot believe I missed the rules flaw in discovery. I tried to keep it simple with the rules, but that evidently has its pitfalls. I'll reword the rules/reminder text on that one.
Prosperity counting lands generally make green's land ramp top dog...I really think it should ignore lands...
All cards I post are designed for custom sets...just saying
Don't hold so fast to your idea of what Magic and the Color Pie is or should be. Just because it was done in the past, but isn't done in the present doesn't mean it can't be done at all. Likewise, just because it wasn't done at all doesn't mean it can't be done.
Here's a tip: If you suggest changing a card...it's helpful to suggest HOW it should be changed.
Enchantment ARE magical, there is no other way. Both cards you linked could be easily explained as a magical effect with no "tech" as you call it.
You're adamant on making this mistake, I believe.
Also, prosperity shouldn't be red at all. It should b GWU, mostly W though.
All cards I post are designed for custom sets...just saying
Don't hold so fast to your idea of what Magic and the Color Pie is or should be. Just because it was done in the past, but isn't done in the present doesn't mean it can't be done at all. Likewise, just because it wasn't done at all doesn't mean it can't be done.
Here's a tip: If you suggest changing a card...it's helpful to suggest HOW it should be changed.
WU
Vesio the Pacifist
0/2
[t] target creature cannot attack or block until, then put a convert counter on it. Use this ability only during your turn
Legacy: When Vesio the Idealist dies, gain control of all creatures with one or more convert counters on them, creatures you control may not attack, and gain the ability [t] target creature may not attack or block until your next turn, then put a convert counter on it.
Vesio basically is pacifism on a stick. When he dies, all of his followers start teaching his philosophy to all of the other creatures. Maybe there could be a cycle of 10 legendary creatures, that are not on a certain side, but try to influence the people around them. Maybe Philosophy could be an ability that has to do with teaching the lessons of a certain legendary creature.
Philosophy: Choose a legendary creature you control (the card will state what happens next, different for each card). I really like the idea that each of the groups have some sort of goal, although I do not like nixe, because their common goal is just hitting stuff. What if their thing was to revert back to the "natural way". Black wouldn't be for evil, it would be for death. Maybe they have an ability that hinders other groups.
Your idea for Legacy, though, sort of defies what was meant of the mechanic; I intended it to last for either the rest of the turn or a couple of turns. Vesio really just has a leaves-the-battlefield effect, though the flavor of Legacy is there.