Out of curiosity, is there a reason for your choice in each wedge's primary color? I'm fairly sure the proper method is the odd colored one gets it, as its the one at the tip of the wedge triangle on the pie. (So for WUR, Red would be primary.) But, hey, its a free country, I was just wondering.
It is now over two years since you started posting this (and over a year since the last update.) I stumbled upon the set, and decided to review it. There's good stuff and bad stuff, but I wouldn't have taken the time to read through it all, and write this if I didn't like the set, so don't see any criticism as an insult to the design.
Keywords:
Rally: (Note, it is now the future, and Wizards has used this keyword for a different ability in BFZ. For the purposes of this post, I am pretending that never happened.) I really like rally: the goal is different from Exalted, in that it's about pushing through a soldier or two rather than attacking with your champion. The flavor is all there: the lords sitting cozy in mansions as the tokens do the dirty work. It also asks defensive cards to play aggressively, which is always an interesting place to be in-play, as well as in-design. I like this ability less for rebels, and I'd rather see them approaching from a different angle.
Gravestorm: This is a very dangerous mechanic, and I think that most of the time, cards with this ability will either be broken, or bad. When it's working properly, it's a lot like morbid, and there are some cards here that I think use the ability well, but as a mechanic, I don't think it's one that can be used willy-nilly.
Energize: This mechanic is great. It would be very interesting to play with, and the power level is high enough that it would be sure to make an impression on constructed. The problem is the danger that accompanies the fact that all cards with the ability rainbow mana-dorks: if there was a critical mass of decent ones, some degenerate things would undoubtedly occur, as degenerate things always follow easily accessible fast mana. With two Lifesparks in play, and all your permanents tapped, you have access to any two-mana charm or Counterspell. Wild Cantor is not all that far back from that, but it's a lot of flexibility to have on a keyword.
Tribes:
Lords: I really like the flavor, particularly with the way they work with rally. I could see the serf creature type coming back here. There is a lot of story here that is not being shown in the text of the cards in terms of who the lords are, and how this mixed up feudalism operates. Those things can be hinted at in art and flavor text, and the fact that the creature type effortlessly evokes all of that is a strong sign. A lot of the common lords have names that are far too grandiose for what they are (Lord of Mechanical Greatness, and Lord of Deforestation for example.) This points out one problem: how do you make something grand like a lord feel right at common? One answer would be with art: demonstrating humorously that the lords take themselves far more seriously than they really are. Unfortunately, custom cards like these seldom get art, but at least that works as far as imagination.
Rebels: I feel that there is not enough distinction between the lords and the rebels in terms of how they operate: they both feature the same keyword, and both in very similar ways. Since rebels are actively fighting the Lords, it seems like they should have a tangibly different strategy for doing so. It doesn't necessarily need to be keyworded, and it need not be exactly the same as the searching mechanic in Masques, but something vaguely similar would be nice (perhaps a Goblin Ringleader type effect on 3 to 5 cards would help.)
Elementals: I like the elementals, though I think I want there to be more common green elementals as opposed to common green zombies. I don't like the cards that only work with elementals (out of context, River Water makes Squire look sweet,) but I think you could fix them by making them affect any creature, but have an additional upside for elementals: cards that only work with one creature type can be parasitic, and aren't the kind of tribal bonus you want. Elementals feels like a deck in limited, and that's a good thing. Like lords, they give you a tangible direction to play in: ramp elementals into bigger elementals.
Horrors: I really want to like the horrors as a tribe, but they fail here to carve out any room for themselves. The only difference between the horrors and the elementals is that the horrors are more horrible. Sure, art and flavor can go a long way towards making them satisfying to play, but I feel like you missed some great opportunities. Like rebels, horrors need a distinct style of play, and with them specifically, I think I keyword is needed. Something like extort that is an incrementally punishing feels like it would fit thematically. For example: Bane (at the beginning of your upkeep, each player loses 1 life.)
Zombies: I am not particularly bothered by zombies in blue and green; science zombies, sure. I like that you include animals prominently, and I like the creepy "coccoon" things, though my vision of them is probably different from yours. I think the biggest problem of the zombie tribe is Gravestorm. The mechanic is just so dangerous. I really want the zombies to work in such a way that you can sacrifice and recur them to various abilities, enabling graveyard and death mechanics to work smoothly, but between Energizers and Gravestorm, things get really dangerous really quickly. I think you should simply replace Gravestorm with a Morbid parallel on most cards, and keep Gravestorm (as I do like the idea of bringing it back) as an ability that only appears on uncommons and rares.
All in all:
What shines: As is, I think I could see a limited environment being viable, and enjoyable, as most of the cards are at appropriate rarity for their power level (though some of the common three-color cards are pretty strong,) and there are a few tangible directions to try and draft around. The creature types are interesting choices: lords and horrors are certainly not the obvious choices for a tribal set, and are definitely evocative. I like all the mechanics (as much as I shrink away from Gravestorm,) and I like that you reused some themes to bring the set together (such as the rally walls.)
What is missing: The biggest thing that is missing from this tribal set is tribal effects. Since lords all have rally, and thus are working towards a similar strategy, that tribe definitely has some cohesion (though rebels step on its toes by stealing the ability,) but otherwise, there are very few instances of creature type mattering, which is strange in a set with so many tribal instants and sorceries. Each of the tribes needs a cohesion, so crossover can occur (and doubtlessly will in the murky waters of limited,) but at the core, Horrors are working at the problem in a different way than zombies. Three mechanics is simply not enough for five tribes: not that I am necessarily arguing for more keywords- often the impulse is to create a keyword for an ability that doesn't need one.
I'm sure you're not working on this specific set anymore, but I hope that this review might be helpful to your genereal designing brain.
Your rally keyword is pretty bad... it's hard to imagine the 1/1 token ever really being worth it... it'll usually die, or if it doesn't you'll now have a 1/1 that you can't attack with.
It gets sacrificed at the end of the turn, so you never get to keep it, but I disagree that the ability is bad: you didn't get to keep the +1/+1s from exalted either, but that didn't make it a bad ability, after all, the token may die, but the rally ability probably doesn't. The idea on these cards is to play several cards with the ability, so that you can attack with a completely expendable army, push through 2-3 damage (something exalted never did) and still have a defensive board.
You're first 1/1 is probably a chump attack, but once you have a few, it becomes very annoying for the opponent, and they are put in the position of being asked to trade real cards for expendable tokens. There is also a large potential for combat trick blow-outs, since usually people will be more wary of a chump attack. Add to all that the fact that there are several ways to make the soldiers more relevant, and you have a powerful, and easily built around mechanic. The real problem is you want your rally guys to be defensive enough that you don't mind letting them stay back, but good enough that you don't mind playing several of them, and you need a champion who can usher in the attack and not die.
It's true that some of the cards with the ability are kind of arguing with themselves by wanting to just turn creatures sideways, rather than wanting to create a simultaneously stable and aggressive board position (which is what rally wants to do.) That's not necessarily a problem as most cards are made for limited, and in limited, you need some of those guys. I'm more of a fan of the walls with the ability (though a token making a token is odd,) and the noncreatures with it. What's really missing is a land: Lordly Palace
Land T: Add C to your mana pool
Rally
That would be a card that would most likely see some play in constructed. Along the same lines, Aven MagistrateW
Creature-Bird Lord
Flying, rally
0/2
would be a card that would push that strategy, but that kind of pushing is dangerous, and I'm not recommending it (especially considering the number of two drops that already have the ability.) The point, though is that the ability is inherently powerful.
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Avant Block: Avant -- Stormfront
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Well, here's a few black uncommons, and a rare.
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Keywords:
Rally: (Note, it is now the future, and Wizards has used this keyword for a different ability in BFZ. For the purposes of this post, I am pretending that never happened.) I really like rally: the goal is different from Exalted, in that it's about pushing through a soldier or two rather than attacking with your champion. The flavor is all there: the lords sitting cozy in mansions as the tokens do the dirty work. It also asks defensive cards to play aggressively, which is always an interesting place to be in-play, as well as in-design. I like this ability less for rebels, and I'd rather see them approaching from a different angle.
Gravestorm: This is a very dangerous mechanic, and I think that most of the time, cards with this ability will either be broken, or bad. When it's working properly, it's a lot like morbid, and there are some cards here that I think use the ability well, but as a mechanic, I don't think it's one that can be used willy-nilly.
Energize: This mechanic is great. It would be very interesting to play with, and the power level is high enough that it would be sure to make an impression on constructed. The problem is the danger that accompanies the fact that all cards with the ability rainbow mana-dorks: if there was a critical mass of decent ones, some degenerate things would undoubtedly occur, as degenerate things always follow easily accessible fast mana. With two Lifesparks in play, and all your permanents tapped, you have access to any two-mana charm or Counterspell. Wild Cantor is not all that far back from that, but it's a lot of flexibility to have on a keyword.
Tribes:
Lords: I really like the flavor, particularly with the way they work with rally. I could see the serf creature type coming back here. There is a lot of story here that is not being shown in the text of the cards in terms of who the lords are, and how this mixed up feudalism operates. Those things can be hinted at in art and flavor text, and the fact that the creature type effortlessly evokes all of that is a strong sign. A lot of the common lords have names that are far too grandiose for what they are (Lord of Mechanical Greatness, and Lord of Deforestation for example.) This points out one problem: how do you make something grand like a lord feel right at common? One answer would be with art: demonstrating humorously that the lords take themselves far more seriously than they really are. Unfortunately, custom cards like these seldom get art, but at least that works as far as imagination.
Rebels: I feel that there is not enough distinction between the lords and the rebels in terms of how they operate: they both feature the same keyword, and both in very similar ways. Since rebels are actively fighting the Lords, it seems like they should have a tangibly different strategy for doing so. It doesn't necessarily need to be keyworded, and it need not be exactly the same as the searching mechanic in Masques, but something vaguely similar would be nice (perhaps a Goblin Ringleader type effect on 3 to 5 cards would help.)
Elementals: I like the elementals, though I think I want there to be more common green elementals as opposed to common green zombies. I don't like the cards that only work with elementals (out of context, River Water makes Squire look sweet,) but I think you could fix them by making them affect any creature, but have an additional upside for elementals: cards that only work with one creature type can be parasitic, and aren't the kind of tribal bonus you want. Elementals feels like a deck in limited, and that's a good thing. Like lords, they give you a tangible direction to play in: ramp elementals into bigger elementals.
Horrors: I really want to like the horrors as a tribe, but they fail here to carve out any room for themselves. The only difference between the horrors and the elementals is that the horrors are more horrible. Sure, art and flavor can go a long way towards making them satisfying to play, but I feel like you missed some great opportunities. Like rebels, horrors need a distinct style of play, and with them specifically, I think I keyword is needed. Something like extort that is an incrementally punishing feels like it would fit thematically. For example: Bane (at the beginning of your upkeep, each player loses 1 life.)
Zombies: I am not particularly bothered by zombies in blue and green; science zombies, sure. I like that you include animals prominently, and I like the creepy "coccoon" things, though my vision of them is probably different from yours. I think the biggest problem of the zombie tribe is Gravestorm. The mechanic is just so dangerous. I really want the zombies to work in such a way that you can sacrifice and recur them to various abilities, enabling graveyard and death mechanics to work smoothly, but between Energizers and Gravestorm, things get really dangerous really quickly. I think you should simply replace Gravestorm with a Morbid parallel on most cards, and keep Gravestorm (as I do like the idea of bringing it back) as an ability that only appears on uncommons and rares.
All in all:
What shines: As is, I think I could see a limited environment being viable, and enjoyable, as most of the cards are at appropriate rarity for their power level (though some of the common three-color cards are pretty strong,) and there are a few tangible directions to try and draft around. The creature types are interesting choices: lords and horrors are certainly not the obvious choices for a tribal set, and are definitely evocative. I like all the mechanics (as much as I shrink away from Gravestorm,) and I like that you reused some themes to bring the set together (such as the rally walls.)
What is missing: The biggest thing that is missing from this tribal set is tribal effects. Since lords all have rally, and thus are working towards a similar strategy, that tribe definitely has some cohesion (though rebels step on its toes by stealing the ability,) but otherwise, there are very few instances of creature type mattering, which is strange in a set with so many tribal instants and sorceries. Each of the tribes needs a cohesion, so crossover can occur (and doubtlessly will in the murky waters of limited,) but at the core, Horrors are working at the problem in a different way than zombies. Three mechanics is simply not enough for five tribes: not that I am necessarily arguing for more keywords- often the impulse is to create a keyword for an ability that doesn't need one.
I'm sure you're not working on this specific set anymore, but I hope that this review might be helpful to your genereal designing brain.
Low-power cube enthusiast!
My 1570 card cube (no longer updated)
My 415 Peasant+ Artifact and Enchantment Cube
Ever-Expanding "Just throw it in" cube.
You're first 1/1 is probably a chump attack, but once you have a few, it becomes very annoying for the opponent, and they are put in the position of being asked to trade real cards for expendable tokens. There is also a large potential for combat trick blow-outs, since usually people will be more wary of a chump attack. Add to all that the fact that there are several ways to make the soldiers more relevant, and you have a powerful, and easily built around mechanic. The real problem is you want your rally guys to be defensive enough that you don't mind letting them stay back, but good enough that you don't mind playing several of them, and you need a champion who can usher in the attack and not die.
It's true that some of the cards with the ability are kind of arguing with themselves by wanting to just turn creatures sideways, rather than wanting to create a simultaneously stable and aggressive board position (which is what rally wants to do.) That's not necessarily a problem as most cards are made for limited, and in limited, you need some of those guys. I'm more of a fan of the walls with the ability (though a token making a token is odd,) and the noncreatures with it. What's really missing is a land:
Lordly Palace
Land
T: Add C to your mana pool
Rally
That would be a card that would most likely see some play in constructed. Along the same lines,
Aven Magistrate W
Creature-Bird Lord
Flying, rally
0/2
would be a card that would push that strategy, but that kind of pushing is dangerous, and I'm not recommending it (especially considering the number of two drops that already have the ability.) The point, though is that the ability is inherently powerful.
Low-power cube enthusiast!
My 1570 card cube (no longer updated)
My 415 Peasant+ Artifact and Enchantment Cube
Ever-Expanding "Just throw it in" cube.